I really didn't think I would update so quickly, but whatever. This is what I think would happen when Sherlock came back. It's kind of short, but that's mostly 'coz I'm feeling lazy right now...Oh well! Enjoy!
Two years. It takes two years for Sherlock to remember John exists. And then he comes sauntering in to interrupt his date, and John is feeling so many flashes of déjà vu. And like all the other times, his first thought is, "Oh God, please let him be polite enough for her to like him." Because John cares about both of them, and he needs them to get along. His second thought is, "That bastard left me for two years!" Hence, his instinctive reaction.
His heart literally jumps out of his chest when he sees the 'waiter'- actually, a lot of his organs spontaneously shift places. Because Sherlock is here, and he came back, and he had come to meet John, and for a moment he floats in a euphoric haze, until he remembers that he was abandoned, the bloody prat. So he stands and stares at Sherlock, until he starts to fidget and avoid eye contact, until he finally pulls himself together. "Short version? Not dead." He continues to say something about how he shouldn't have surprised John, because it could have caused a heart attack or something, and John is standing there and trying his very best to not punch him, he is an idiot, you know that, but it isn't working. Then Mary suddenly realises who it is, who is causing John to get so angry and happy and irritated and hurt.
"Oh no! You're ..."
"Oh yes." He glances at her and then obviously dismisses her
"Oh, my God."
"Not quite."
"You died. You jumped off a roof."
"No."
"You're dead!"
"No. I'm quite sure. I checked. Excuse me". He cleans of that ridiculous moustache, looking a little like a little boy caught stealing cookies.
"Does, er, does yours rub off, too?" At this point John starts wondering why, exactly, he hasn't punched Sherlock yet.
"Oh my God, oh my God. Do you have any idea what you've done to him?"
At this point John decides it is probably better to intervene, partly because Mary is starting to sound murderous, and partly because it will probably help him keep his temper.
"I knew you weren't dead."
Sherlock freezes, mouth open, before he coughs. "Come again?"
John feels a small spark of pride that he managed to surprise Sherlock Homes, before he repeats his statement, glaring at Sherlock. "I knew you weren't dead, idiot. I'm a doctor, remember? That little trick of yours wouldn't work on me. So yes, I knew you weren't dead. I waited for you to tell me, but you didn't. And it isn't like you knew that I knew, which means that you would have been perfectly happy to leave me in the dark." He stops here to draw breath, fully intending to go on, when Sherlock speaks. "John, I realise that I probably owe you some kind of apology…" At this, John shoots his gaze up incredulously, because, probably? Sherlock sees the look and hastily tries to defend himself. "Wait – before you do anything that you might regret ... um, one question. Just let me ask one question. Um ..."
John waits. Sherlock looks at him. "Are you really going to keep that?" He gestures to the moustache and chuckles, and Mary laughs, and John loses his tenacious grip on his anger. Next thing he knows, waiters are pulling him and Sherlock apart, and the three of them spend the rest of the night shifting from one place to another, because Sherlock is an idiot, and there is a limit to John's temper. By the end of the night, though, Mary obviously likes Sherlock, Sherlock has collected an admirable number of bruises, and John has a few memories which, in retrospect, are rather funny. Not that he will ever admit it. He will also never admit that by the third fight he had more or less been faking anger. Because this was Sherlock, and John would always forgive him, because that was how it worked.
All in all, he thinks it is a good night, because the two most important people in his life (other than Harry, because Harry doesn't like Sherlock very much, and at the moment, he doesn't like Harry very much) are getting along. But he pretends to ignore Sherlock, act as if he isn't forgiven, because Mary is pretty much consoling Sherlock, and it makes John feel all bubby and happy.
And he does not shave of his moustache just because Sherlock said something. Mary doesn't know everything. Actually, Mary appears to be convinced that he and Sherlock were in some kind of relationship (but then, most people tend to think so), and strangely enough seems very happy about that fact. He decides to worry later about the fact that his future wife (hopefully) is a total fangirl.
Unfortunately, he may have been rather enthusiastic about acting upset to Sherlock, which means that Sherlock doesn't contact him, and he spends the day bored out of his mind 9because there is a voice in his head saying Sherlock's here, go to him, he's exciting and fun.
Of course, Sherlock coming back means that the kidnappings double in number, and after about four failed attempts and a long day at work, he is caught unprepared outside 221B Baker Street and taken. He wakes up surrounded by wood and other really flammable substances, and the flickers of flame and fire that he sees through his 'prison' tell him where he is.
He is the human Guy that will be burned tonight.
Then he is surrounded by light and heat and it hurts, damn it. He feels hands, pulling and pushing, protecting, saving hands. Sherlock. Mary. They are screaming his name, and they sound scared. And they shouldn't be scared, ever, because it is his job to protect them, and he is still alive, so he struggles to get up, to protect them. And he hears relief in their voices, and calms down, because they are safe.
He goes to Sherlock after he is discharged from the hospital, and sees him with two people, and they are sweet and caring, and at the same time fiercely protective of Sherlock and when he says they are his parents, John can see the resemblance so acutely, but he knows Sherlock, knows he cannot say that, so he jokes about how ordinary they are (but they can't be; they brought Sherlock and Mycroft into the world) and Sherlock plays along. Then he says sorry, so quiet and desperate, and John has no choice, because Sherlock is hurting, so he nods, and he knows Sherlock will take that as the forgiveness it is. Then they get to work, just like they always do, as if the last two years didn't happen, because they fall into place with the ease of puzzle pieces, Sherlock explaining, and John listening and unknowingly pushing him into the answers.
And then they are off, running around London, around the city they protect, searching for the bomb that threatens it. And they find it, and they are stuck there, and Sherlock manages to weasel a compliment out of John, and almost gives John a heart attack, but they live and laugh together again, and John is overwhelmingly happy. All that remains is to bring Mary into his life as well. Permanently.
Granted, his proposal is rather spontaneous. He is walking with her on the banks of the river, trying to pluck up the courage to ask her, when Sherlock appears, congratulates Mary and tells John that he has a case. "Come on John! Bring your fiancée too, if you must; I'm sure she'll enjoy it." And Mary is laughing at his annoyed face, and Sherlock is looking impatient, so he just gets down on one knee and takes her hand. "Mary Morstan, you're smart and you probably figured out what Sherlock was going on about, and you haven't run, so I'm going to take that as a yes. So here." He places the box with the ring in her hand, stands up, takes her other hand, and they follow Sherlock, her laughter at the rather unorthodox proposal floating on the wind, joined eventually by Sherlock's and his laughter as well.
And he is glad that his new life starts just like his life with Sherlock did; laughter in the face of danger. Because the Game was ON.
I...have no idea what to say about that. Meh, whatever. Hope you liked it, tell me if you did. And if you didn't, tell me why. Review please!
