People are saying that this looks interesting, Lord have mercy that really was not the intent. This is like a parody omg unless people want a serious story moving, it's mostly humor and silliness for now.

Anyhow, to anon: This story isn't written with serious intentions in the slightest. All those times I brought up Alice's 'averageness' was literally for ironic/satire purposes because in shoujo animes (Cardcaptor Sakura included) they try to put emphasis on how normal the protagonist is before she get her magic/adventure when usually, even before the magic she has a perfect life.

Also this fic doesn't really have a set pairing because the other half to my otp won't be showing up for a while lol I'm just going to have fun letting Alice 'seduce' cards, her best friend, and rival. Gray is literally just here for eye candy like Yukito was in Cardcaptor Sakura so don't worry about him and Alice actually getting together or anything lmfao

-.-

Chapter 2: Alice and the Coffee Peach Crème Rabbit

"Waaaah! I'm late, I'm late, I'm so late! Did I mention that I'm late?"

Nightmare yawned sleepily with a rub to his eye from his makeshift bed within Alice's sock drawer, "What's up with all this noise? It sounds like someone's late," He mumbled.

Alice scrambled to get her top adjusted from in front of her mirror before she dashed over beneath her bed to pull out a pair of Mary Jane shoes frantically. She glanced over at Nightmare in a panic, "Toss me a pair of coffee peach crème colored socks, please!"

"What?" The male blankly questioned the girl that skipped back to her mirror to begin brushing her hair.

"Toss me a pair of coffee peach crème colored socks!"

The Guardian of the Seal was silent for a moment, his visible eye glancing down at the socks all around him before he picked up one that looked beige, "Uh, this?"

Alice glanced over her shoulder before she furrowed her eyebrows, "That's mocha mint mix colored! Are you blind!?"

"Well, sorry! Is it this one?"

"Are you serious!? That's frosted chocolate chip latte!"

"Are you making up these adjectives in your head or…?"

"Talk about unreliable... You can't guard a seal and you can't differentiate between basic colors either." Alice sighed heavily before she made her way over.

Nightmare flew out from the drawer with a cross expression on his face while he watched the female pull out a pair of seemingly white colored socks. The male twitched, "Those are white. Why didn't you just tell me to get the white socks instead of all the fancy words!?"

Alice waved him off after she began pulling the socks on her feet, "They aren't white. They're coffee peach crème." After she finished, she moved to push her feet into her shoes before standing upright.

"It's white! Stop being so pretentious!"

Blowing up some of her bang, Alice went over to the farther side of the room to pick up her book bag, "Lorina calls it coffee peach crème, so it's coffee peach crème. I guess wearing that pirate eye patch screws up your sense of color or something."

With her motions making it appear as though she were about to depart, Nightmare became more attentive from his spot on her dresser top.

Alice adjusted her bow on top of her head with a sigh while she clutched her bag a bit tighter, "Alright, I'm going to be heading off to school for a couple of hours. Lorina and Edith leave within an hour or less after me, so when they leave the house is basically empty until I come home. You can feel free to go around the house on your own when they're gone. I left some snacks and stuff out on top of the fridge in case you get hungry."

Nightmare nodded understandingly, "Are you sure you don't want me going with you—"

"Bye!"

Slam!

Alice descended down the steps quickly and as she did, she halted about one step from the bottom with a frown coming to her face.

This was going to be her first time facing her family since her averageness was taken away. She had eaten dinner in her room with Nightmare last night in order to learn more about this cardcaptoring business so now she was going to have to be extremely discrete about everything.

Taking a deep breath, she continued going down the stairs with a straighter posture.

"Good morning to my normal and non-magical siblings. It's me, equally normal, average, non-magical Alice here for breakfast before school, hahahahaha…" The brunette laughed out nervously with a wave as she moved to take a seat at the table.

She totally nailed it.

Edith gave her a strange look through the thick of her black dyed hair before she went back to texting on her phone dismissively and Lorina let out a small giggle as she turned away from washing the dishes, "Good morning to you too, Alice."

"Yeah, good morning. Haha, such a great day for people that don't possess magic, right?" She coughed before taking a bite of the sausage on her plate.

This was going great. They didn't suspect her at all.

She just had to keep playing it cool.

"Freak." Edith muttered lowly causing one of Alice's eyes to give a twitch with an irritated glare her way.

Lorina stopped the flow of the faucet with a small twinkling laugh, "Well, I like to think we all possess a little magic in us all."

The teen's face immediately faltered and she slammed her hands on the table before she stood to her feet abruptly.

In surprise, both of her sisters turned to her questioningly causing the middle Liddell daughter to airily laugh, "Wow, would you look at the time? I'm going to head out now, see you normal, non-magical chicas later!" With a wave she immediately ran over to the door to begin putting on her skates before she dashed out of the house.

Sighing heavily, Alice slowly skid down the pavement, "I really don't know about this cardcaptor business…" She mumbled to herself lowly with her eyes closed.

Yes, it was dangerous to skate with your eyes closed, but she knew that all main characters in TV shows had to close their eyes when they were sulking all alone.

It was for dramatic effect or something.

"Maybe Nightmare's wrong and made a mistake… I'm just an average girl, I can't possibly catch those cards, much less even have magic." Alice heaved another sigh as she continued skating forward until she bumped into someone solid up ahead.

Squeaking in surprise, her eyes fluttered opened to view whoever she hit in the middle of her depressed outer monologue.

"Careful, you hit me in the middle of your depressed outer monologue." Gray laughed lightly as he caught the female in his arms before she could fall.

Alice's cheeks immediately glowed red in embarrassment and her eyes grew even wider than their already larger-than-life appearance.

"G-Gray!" She called his name loudly despite the fact that both of them were already well aware of who each other were, "Ah! I'm so sorry! I didn't see you there!"

"Well, that's kind of expected since you were skating with your eyes closed. Don't you know that's dangerous?" He scolded with furrowed eyebrows, though it was obvious he was concerned.

It was then that Alice came to notice he was still holding her in his arms.

His strong arms.

His strong, firm arms.

His strong, firm, lean arms.

God bless.

"R-Right! Silly me! I was just getting lost while narrating in my head, aha!" Alice nervously laughed out with a hand to her cheek while she kept her eyes ahead at Gray's chest.

"It's alright, just be more careful, please? I'm sure that whatever has you down will be solved eventually. You're a strong and capable girl after all." Gray nodded at her with a sweet smile before he released her, "Have a good day at school, Alice." He waved politely before continuing his way.

Alice waved back, "Thanks! You too! Ah, damn he is so fine." She moaned with a bite to her bottom lip, her cheeks still pink though a new sense of happiness was in her body.

If a perfect piece of ass like Gray thought she was strong and capable that meant she could do anything!

Now feeling more upbeat, the brunette began skating toward her school more quickly than before and with her eyes opened.

As Alice made it closer to the gates of her school, she could see kids still beginning to pour in and she smiled and waved at each of the kids she passed that all greeted her for the morning.

Up ahead, she could make out Peter standing by the entrance of the large iron gates primly and the instant he caught sight of her he straightened up with his eyes going from 'I'm surrounded by morons' to 'I've felt God and he is real.'

"Alice, good morning!" Peter exclaimed with a large wave over to her and Alice grunted while she clutched her bag strap tighter.

As air-headed as Peter could be whenever it came down to her, the guy could be scarily observant. He usually noticed when the slightest things were off with her.

Hell, sometimes he even knew she was getting sick days before Alice even developed a cough.

But that was aside the point.

What was important was making sure he didn't know she was a cardcaptor and that she was burdened with great mystical purpose.

She had this in the bag.

"Alice?" Peter questioned now with a tilt to his head right as the female ceased skating right in front of him.

Alice squeaked fearfully as she was thrust out of her thoughts with a flail to her hands in the air madly, "WHAT MAGICAL POWERS!?"

Peter blinked.

Oh, shit. He was onto her.

Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God.

She had to play this off. She couldn't let him know the truth.

"Ahahahaha! Peter, Peter White, Peter not-so-Cottontail, you my friend, are the definition of a jokester. Pfft, me? Magic? So funny. Good one, mate."

"I never—"

"I'm too average for that, Peter. Gosh, just drop it." Alice huffed with an oh-so dramatic hair flip over her shoulder and a shaky scoff.

Her friend appeared entirely bemused while he stared down at her silently.

Did she finally shake him off of her back?

If she played her cards right, she'd be able to make him forget this all ever happened…

"LOOK AT MY COFFEE PEACH CRÈME COLORED SOCKS!" She shouted loudly before pulling her foot out of her skates and smashing her clean socked foot into his face.

As average as Alice was she was also an average part time cheerleader at her school. She was only average enough to be one of the best on the squad, but nothing more so making a kick as high as that though extremely painful looking to the average observer was nothing to her.

Peter stiffly stood, "Dzey schluk morgeous on vou." His voice muffled out from behind her foot.

Riiiiiiing

Alice lowered her leg, "Wow, class time! Ah, I still have to put up my skates! I'll see you in first period, Peter!"

God, that couldn't have been any closer.

He was so close to finding out the truth.

Alice placed her skates inside of her locker with a loose breath. She was already a couple minutes late for first period and though she loved having perfect attendance, since she was already late there was no point in rushing there now anyways.

"Gosh, I'm lying to my best friend and family, I'm bumping into Gray when my eyes are closed, and now I'm late for class… I can't do anything right," Alice mumbled out glumly with slumped shoulders after she closed her locker door.

"I can't do those things… Obviously I'll fail at being a cardcaptor." Picking up her back and slinging it over one arm, she began to exit the shoe-locker room, "Nightmare was definitely wrong. I'm not cut out for…" She trailed off with wide eyes as she looked down the hallway.

It was all so…

"Clean," Alice muttered in surprise with one of her hands fleeting to her mouth.

Her school wasn't normally dirty by any means, but this was just perfect.

The halls were empty and she knew it was because classes had started only a couple minutes ago. Still filled with amazement, she walked out into the corridor and glanced around at the seemingly sparkling area.

The janitors were stepping up their game, it was beautiful.

"Mmmph!"

Alice stopped her steps as she felt some motion occurring from within her bag.

Confused, she slung it around to her front in order to unzip it and the moment she did, she found her eyebrow twitching when Nightmare erupted from the confines of it huffing tiredly.

"Geez, it's so stuffy in here! And what do you do!? Spray in here with perfumes? It's so suffocating!"

"What are you doing in my bag!? I told you to stay home!" Alice irritably said with a slight glare.

Nightmare held the blue flamingo head key in his hands, "You left this! A cardcaptor can't leave home without it! No need to thank me." He arrogantly remarked causing Alice to growl under her breath.

"I don't need that! I'm at school!"

He shrugged, "It's a good thing that I did bring it to you for school considering how I feel the presence of a Wonder Card right now."

Before she could respond, Alice found her eyes widening at the feeling of someone touching her skin just below her knee.

In surprise, she glanced down and somehow her teal gaze landed on what appeared to be a white rabbit wearing not only a red patterned coat, but also cute round little glasses while it stood up on its hind legs staring up at her with its beady little red eyes.

She blinked, "A stuffed bunny—" Her words didn't get to finish as she watched the oddly clothed fuzzy creature begin to hop away from her.

A bit of fear made its way into her system from the moment she saw it move and she speechlessly watched it flee down the hall, however, glancing back down at herself where the animal had touched her, Alice came to notice that her socks seemed much brighter than before…

Almost as though they were fresh out of the original packaging they had come in.

"Huh…?"

"Alice, that's it! That's the Wonder Card! Wow, such convenient timing. What are the odds that it'd pop up right in front of you with no one else in the halls around to see you or it, huh?" Nightmare contentedly inquired.

Alice unsurely placed her bag back on her back as Nightmare flew beside her, "That's a Wonder Card?" She questioned as it turned down a corner and she immediately began trailing after it.

"Yup, the White Rabbit card!" Nightmare nodded as they turned around the corridor and came upon the sight of it now touching the walls and the instant after it did so, the dingy slightly yellow painted wall became a sparkling white free of any sort of vandalism and Instagram self-promotions.

Afraid of being detected by the being again, Alice hid behind a wall of lockers while the White Rabbit card continued touching things down the new hall.

"What's it doing!?" Alice questioned frantically as she watched it go on.

"It's," Nightmare seriously began, his voice dropped a few octaves and the brunette turned to look at him fearfully, "Bleaching everything."

Alice turned to him with her hands to her chest, "What's that mean!?"

"It's cleaning whatever it comes in contact with to the utmost perfection." He explained gravely and Alice found herself blinking.

With a raised brow she skeptically eyed him, "No, seriously."

The guardian didn't lose his solemn expression, "I'm completely serious."

"Are you even for real? Is that seriously what you have me racing to capture!? A card that works as a maid!? That isn't bad! In fact, the world needs more cards like that! I say we let it loose in the city, Lord knows how dirty it is!"

Nightmare shook his head, "No, Alice, you don't understand… The White Rabbit at first seems like an innocent OCD-diagnosed card, but Carroll had to fuck shit up by making it have a bit of a quirk added to the mix."

The female curiously watched at him as a way to signal for him to continue, but the sound of footsteps coming down from the other end of hall infiltrated her ears and she perked up instantly.

Cautiously, she leaned herself against the lockers as tightly as she could before she peeked over.

Her eyes grew wide the moment she spotted Peter now approaching the White Rabbit, though he remained entirely oblivious seeing as his attention was focused on a sheet of paper he had in his hands.

"Peter!" Alice instinctively called out in fear when she saw the card visibly notice the teen's presence.

Hearing his name, the albino blinked before glancing over his shoulder and right at that moment the White Rabbit began hopping towards him faster than Alice expected.

But Peter was always spick and span and 100% cleaner than Obama's snapchat, the White Rabbit wouldn't have anything to bleach off of him, so what was going to happen if it touched him? Alice nervously bit her bottom lip while she watched on.

Peter blew up.

No, just kidding, but in Alice's mind he might as well have considering how it was as though his whole life force was absorbed into the White Rabbit's body.

"PETER!" The brunette screamed in horror with a hand raised out in the direction of the card and she had no idea why her hand was held outward because it wasn't even like she was within arms distance of Peter.

"You- You killed Peter!" Alice hollered at the card in mortification though it ignored her and returned its attention to bleaching the lockers.

Alice found tears coming to her eyes as she shook. "P-Peter… You… He's gone…"

"No, he's not. The card just absorbed him… That's certainly interesting…" Nightmare wistfully stated with a hand to his chin, "He must be compatible with the same magic Carroll used to make the White Rabbit card."

Alice's tears vanished, "Oh. He's not dead, 'kay cool, so how do I get him back?" She seriously asked her companion who sighed.

"You need to seal the card first. Also, I feel like I should mention… Your friend Peter got lucky. You see, after the White Rabbit bleaches you once, if it tries to bleach you again but sees you're about as clean as you can get, it takes away your color," He explained briefly and Alice blinked her eyes curiously.

"It takes away your color?"

"Mmhm. It literally sucks out your life force and the parts of your personality that make you unique until you're basically a lifeless zombie."

"Well, that isn't so bad."

"Then if it encounters you for a third time, it shoots you."

"Damn."

"Yeah."

"Okay, well, I'm not in the mood to be shot, so I guess it's time to seal this bad boy… Bad card… Bad bunny… Bad thing…" Alice lamely tried out while Nightmare rolled his eyes.

He watched her knowingly, "Alright, just take out your sealing key and say 'The key that holds the powers of madness and wonder, reveal your true form to me. I, Alice, command thee under our contract! Release!'"

Taking his words into consideration, Alice glanced down at the item within her hand before taking a breath, "Alright, here goes nothing. I have nothing to lose but my life force and personality and then potentially my life."

"The key that holds the powers of madness and wonder, reveal your true form to me. I, Alice, command thee under our contract! Release!" Alice exclaimed much louder than potentially necessary as she found herself getting all into the feeling.

Before her eyes she watched as the small flamingo headed key grew immensely in size into that of a staff. Instinctively, she reached out to grab it and the moment she did, the magical circle beneath her feet vanished and she stared at the item in amazement.

"W-whoa! I did this!?"

"Yes, you did! Now focus! The White Rabbit's your target, now seal him!" Nightmare commanded with a finger pointed at the small creature that was in the process of cleaning the bottom row of lockers. However, it now seemed to take notice to the female's presence and turned to her curiously.

Alice nodded in determination, "Gotcha!" She then paused with a clueless blink before she stood upright and pointed at herself, "Uh, how do I seal him?"

The silver haired guardian slapped himself in the forehead.

"Just say 'Wonder Card created beneath the deck of Time, return to your true form,' and then the name of the card!"

Alice pursed her lips at him, "Why are you giving me attitude!? This is my first time doing this! Sorry that I don't know everything!"

"I don't need your sass right now! Just seal the card!"

"So you mad or nah?"

"Alice, seriously!"

"Okay, okay. Sorry. Now just calm down and watch the cardcaptor do some capturing!" Alice released a calming exhale before raising up her staff in her right hand.

Taking a step forward, she shut her eyes and swung her staff forward while allowing herself to become overwhelmed by the vast amount of magic that seemed to flow all around her.

"Wonder Card created beneath the deck of Time, I command you to return to your true form, White Rabbit!" She ordered before twirling her staff in her hands and hitting the air in front of her as hard as she could.

Nightmare watched her blankly, "Why are you hitting the air!? The White Rabbit's over there!"

The brunette sweatdropped as she stared ahead, her stance not faltering, "Ah… I sort of thought some magic was going to happen and… Wow… Awkward…"

The White Rabbit tilted its head at her before taking an advancing hop forward.

"Uh oh…" Alice sweated anxiously with a step backward whereas Nightmare darted off in the opposite direction, "Run!"

Alice gave a cry before she turned on her heel and began sprinting after the winged guardian as quickly as she could manage, tears at the corners of her eyes as the White Rabbit chased after her.

"Nightmare, help! What do I do!?" The brunette asked desperately after she managed to catch up with him.

"Keep running!"

"I'm pretty sure I'm supposed to chase the White Rabbit, not the other way around! Now how do I seal this thing!?" Alice cried in desperation before she made a sharp turn down one of the halls.

Nightmare sighed with a look backward though his speed didn't slow, "U-Uh… I don't know! You did everything you were supposed to! You called its name, you said the incantation, you struck the staff, and you kissed it!"

The brunette's eyes grew wide, "Wait, what was that last part!?"

"You called its name!"

"No, that was the first part! God damn it, Nightmare! Work with me here!"

"Oh, you kissed it!?"

Alice huffed tiredly as she opened the door to the staircase before promptly shutting it and laying her back on it tiredly. She gazed up at Nightmare tiredly through the thick of her bangs, "I did not kiss it! Grr... You're a terrible guardian. How could you leave that part out?"

The silver haired male twitched in irritation while he glared down at her, "You're the terrible one! Running from the face of danger, hah! Some cardcaptor you are!"

"You were the one that told me to run!" Alice exclaimed up at him in disbelief.

"That was a test and I am sorry to inform you that you failed. F. You got an F, Alice. You know what that means? That means you're a failure. I hope you can live with that."

Clenching her fists, Alice growled, "Whatever! I—Ack!" Without warning, Alice found herself flying forward on her face as the door swung open from behind her.

"Ow…" She moaned painfully while rubbing her reddening nose right as the door gave a heavy close that echoed throughout the stairwell.

Nightmare gave a grunt from above, "Don't turn your back on a card!"

Quickly rising to her feet, Alice nodded before defensively standing with her staff positioned in front of her, "Right!" She could feel the determination returning to her body and she knew she could do this.

She'd capture the card!

The White Rabbit stood at the door looking up at her with its beady red eyes filled with nothing but curiosity and wonder.

The more she looked at it… The more she realized how cute it was...

Within the stairwell silence washed over as Alice and the White Rabbit remained in a stare-down that Alice slowly found herself losing as her cheeks flushed pink and her grip on her staff became shaky.

"S-So cute…" She whined gently before taking a cautious step toward it.

Nightmare's eye twitched, "Careful, Alice!"

With a deep breath, Alice found herself going to her knees before she outstretched one of her hands over to the card welcomingly.

"Come here, little guy… I promise I won't hurt you." Alice coaxed it warmly, a smile coming to her face right before the card took a single hop toward her.

She kept her hand out in offering as it took another hop and another in her direction right before the two of them were mere centimeters apart.

Right then, Alice jumped up from her position close to the ground in order to scoop the rabbit into her arms. Swiftly, she gave it a kiss on the top of its head, her lips brushing on the pure white and soft fur for a single moment before she dropped it to the floor.

Already feeling drained, the female gave a grunt with a step back while she twirled her staff in her fingers.

"Wonder Card created beneath the deck of Time, I command you to return to your true form, White Rabbit!" Alice shouted as her hands struck her staff down on the air and just then the beak of Alice's staff gave a blinding white glow. A card shape made entirely of light began to materialize at the tip where the staff struck and Alice watched with wide eyes as the White Rabbit started to seemingly evaporate into a light that trailed into the card that was now forming in the place her staff had hit.

Peter's body remained in the spot that the rabbit had previously been at, apparently motionless.

Alice gasped as the card finished solidifying and began to float into her awaiting grasp.

That was so cool.

Sure, she almost got her life force and individuality drained away from her forever, but it was still cool.

Kinda.

"I… I did it?" Alice breathed out in disbelief as the situation began to settle in her mind before her eyes grew wide and a smile of triumph made it to her lips, "I did it!" She happily exclaimed while gripping the card with both of her hands.

The White Rabbit.

It had the White Rabbit holding a large pocket watch on the face and some elaborate magical circle inscribed on the back.

"You're officially a cardcaptor now! I knew you could do it!" Nightmare praised her before Alice grunted and gave him a dark side eye, "You called me a failure before."

Nightmare scratched his cheek sheepishly, "That was another test."

Glare.

"Ahaha…?"

Rolling her eyes, Alice returned her pleasant expression to the card before her, "I still can't believe I did it! I guess I'm not as average as I thought!" She sighed, though her smile didn't fade, "The kissing thing wasn't so bad. I can see myself capturing the rest of cards no problem!"

Nightmare looked off expressionlessly, "That's only because the White Rabbit is a non-humanoid card. Just wait until you get to the bigger, more demanding cards like the Knight or the Hatter…"

"What?"

"What."

Alice nodded slowly before she turned the staff back into a key and sighed, "Anyways, I really need to get to class. I'm sure I'm really late… Er…"

"What's wrong? Why are you...? Oh…."

The two stiffly stood now facing Peter as he watched them both with still eyes from his position on the floor.

"Awkward." Nightmare coughed into his hand.

"Alice, what just happened?" Peter questioned cautiously while he adjusted his glasses on his face steadily.

"Uh… I suppose now wouldn't be a good time to show you how much cleaner my coffee peach crème socks are now than they were earlier, huh?" Alice laughed anxiously as brief thoughts of Googling 'How to kill someone and not get arrested' flashed in her mind.

-.-

Wonder Card Index

Cards Captured: The White Rabbit

Cards Remaining: 17