I'm not showing what happens in the nightclub; I thought it would be funnier to see Edward's distress. Anyway, you'll see the funny side of it. So hopefully this wont suck.
I don't own Twilight or New Moon. I do, however, own a year's supply of turtle wax, very generously donated to wrecking hotel rooms, the coolest person I don't know.
Edward looked at the clock anxiously, tapping the table beside him anxiously. A splintering sound echoed in the silence, and his face blanched as he looked at the table. A giant hole had split the wood around it.
Glancing around to make sure Esme hadn't seen, Edward frowned, grabbing a coaster and placing it over the hole. He looked at the clock again. Bella had been gone for exactly three hours, twenty-three minutes, and fifteen seconds. That was three hours, twenty-three minutes, and fourteen seconds too long for Edward's liking.
Sighing, he looked up to see Jasper walk in the door. His blonde-haired brother glanced at him, picking up on his mood. 'Bella not back yet, huh?' Edward's eyes narrowed, and Jasper held his hands up. 'It wasn't my idea…don't take it out on me.' And suddenly Edward was alone again.
Edward jumped up as he heard a car approach. It stopped, and the sounds of a door opening and closing caught his attention. A high pitched giggle echoed in the silence, and the sounds of someone tripping. Bella.
The door was open before Edward could blink, and Emmett stood there, supporting the human. Edward sniffed, tasting the scent of Bella's blood in the air, and snarled. "How much did you let her drink?"
Emmett winced. 'It's not like I knew how easily humans could get intoxicated…' He helped a hysterically laughing Bella over to the chair. "Um, well…okay, it's not as bad as it looks…she's a little excited…"
Edward turned to glare at him. "Excited? Emmett, she's drunk!" Bella blinked, swaying on the spot, and burst out laughing, as though what Edward had said was absolutely hilarious. She stood up. Edward pushed her straight back down. Bella stood straight back up again.
She frowned. "I'm not so think as you drunk I am…" She tilted forward, and Edward caught her just before she hit the ground. Bella giggled. "Hello Mr. Floor…" She burst out into a fit of laughter again.
Alice and Jasper appeared in the room, both not sure whether to laugh or turn straight back. They decided to stay, and both promptly bit back grins. Bella saw them, and waved, stepping forward to talk to them, but tripping instantly. Edward caught her again, sending a furious glare to Emmett.
Alice coughed, hiding a laugh. "I'll call Charlie and ask if I can have Bella stay overnight…I'll say it's for a school project." She danced from the room, gracefully, and Bella tilted her head, pouting.
"How does she do that?" She murmured. "I can't walk like that and I'm Ballerina Bella…" She turned to look at Emmett. "You're so pretty…" Emmett blinked, then shrugged, and held his chin high at the compliment.
Edward growled, glowering at his supposedly older brother. "He is so dead." Bella frowned, turning to face him. She swayed, and his arms snaked around her waist to hold her up.
"Knew I already that." She blinked. "I knew already that." The door opened as Bella cursed, and Esme gasped, holding her hand up to her mouth.
Esme glanced at a shocked Carlisle. "Oh my…Bella? What happened to…" Emmett started to sneak out of the room, but Esme fixed her gaze on him, apparently furious. "Emmett McCarty Cullen, you get back here right now! What did you do?"
Emmett winced, biting his lip. "Bella had a little too much to drink while I was…chastising the bouncers for allowing in underage teenagers! Shocking, honestly. And I turned around, and…Bella had a few…" He grimaced under Edward's scowl. "Sorry?"
Bella smiled, swaying, and giggled as she surveyed Jasper. "You're cute…cutiepie…hi cutiepie…" She hiccuped, and let out another giggle. "Want to play Monopoly? You can be the car…" She turned to grin at Edward, and he held her up tightly. "You're so mean…meany…play nicely with Emma…Emmy…Emmytee…" She giggled. "He's my friend."
"Oh sweet Jesus, Bella, don't make it worse." Emmett groaned. Bella attempted to push Edward's chest in an attempt to free herself, and tripped in the process. Edward's grip on her prevented her from falling too far.
The bronze-haired vampire sighed, exasperated. "Come on, love, let's get you to bed before you hurt yourself…or your dignity." He glanced at Emmett. "I'll deal with you when I'm sure you wont be her cause of death." He scooped Bella up, and she laughed gleefully.
"Wait, Eddyward…meany…I don't wanna go to sleep." She grinned at Jasper. "Lie down with Bella?" Jasper's face blanched, as Alice burst out laughing. Emmett cringed again, and Edward's jaw tensed.
He exhaled deeply. "What have you done, Emmett?"
Sorry it took so long. Drunk Bella is completely, well, intoxicated. No, I have never experienced this. But I know people who have been drunk to this extent. And this could be possible. Next chapter I will attempt to make longer, but I cant be bothered. To those who read it; Vampires And Technology Don't Mix will be up very soon.
If you love Edward and you know it, please review…type, type!
Just A Little Bit Dramatic
