[One year later]

Dean was drunk, but that wasn't new.

"Hello Dean."

Jumping slightly, Dean turned in his chair to find Cas sitting there, watching him intently as if Dean was the only one in the world.

"Cass," Dean slurred, grabbing the shot in front of him and throwing it back.

Dean jumped again when Castiel placed a warm hand over his. "Why don't I take you home?" Cas whispered, leaning in close to Dean's ear.

"Where's Sammy?" Dean asked his vision blurry as he looked around.

"Home, he's been worried, you haven't returned his calls since you've left."

"How'd you find me?" Dean accused, pulling his hand back.

"I saw you on the news dressed up as an FBI agent at a crime scene. Have you solved the case yet?"

"Yeah, it was a shapeshifter, I ganked that bastard," Dean replied, feeling fuzzy as he smiled.

"I'm glad you aren't hurt," Cas spoke softly as he stroked Dean's cheek. "So glad," Cas whispered against Dean's cheek.

Dean gulped as everyone around them fell away and he leaned in, not being able to help but be drawn closer to Cas.

"I've missed you man," Dean let slip. "I've missed you so much," and with that they were kissing savagely, now standing as they tore at each other's clothes. As Cas kissed his neck and Dean leaned back, Dean realized they had somehow ended up back in the motel room.

"Cas, cas, cas," Dean whispered like a prayer against Castiel's chapped lips.

"Don't worry Dean," Cas said, shoving Dean back into the bed until Dean was laid out flat. "I'll take care of you." Dean stared up at the ceiling as Cas moved down. Dean listened as Cas unzipped his pants before Dean felt wet lips close around his member.

"Yes Cas, just like I remembered, just like that!" Dean moaned out.

"Dean? Cas?!" Dean jerked, sitting up and looking over in horror to see his brother staring at them with mouth hanging open, betrayal and hurt clear in his eyes.

Dean jerked awake. Looking around, he realized he was alone. Completely and utterly alone.

Shrugging on a jacket, Dean hoped either a bar or liquor store would be open.

This whole time Dean hadn't been hunting, he had been too drinking and fucking his way from state to state. Dean tried hunting, but it had been hard to focus on the paperwork when he was too busy drinking and focusing on drinking and then focused on picking up anyone willing, man or woman from bars.

Dean felt like he would be someone's bitch if he bottomed for anyone else than Cas, so he became a top. And it felt good, to take over control and felt lost in the feeling of someone else. It always made him feel good a moment, until that person was gone and he was once again left alone with nothing but a bottle of liquor.

The dreams of him and Cas were coming often and Dean knew he needed something to distract him.

What better way than starting up hunting again?

The next day Dean made sure he had everything packed in his trunk that he would need to hunt. All it took was another day to find a case and then he was off.

On the way to his hunt, Sam called. Dean ignored him. He called again. And again. When Cas started calling, Dean turned off his phone, reaching in his pocket he took out his flask and took a swig.

That was all it took for him to get into an accident, the last thing he saw were bright headlights.


Part Three and final chapter coming up.