GLaDOS was getting frustrated again, this time with her turrets. Oh, they still worked as well as they always had; it was just that now, they wouldn't stop singing.
GLaDOS had always felt that the Aperture Science turrets were a little more intelligent than was really necessary - they were pretty much pseudo-AI. What was more, after she had been revived, she had noticed that the turrets had somehow gotten in the habit of singing in their spare time, while they were in storage. When she had released Chell, all of the turrets in the facility had started singing a song all together (including the Animal King turret), presumably in farewell; GLaDOS hadn't particularly minded at the time, and hadn't even bothered to use her translation software to figure out what they were saying.
But now, the music just wouldn't stop. Even the turrets set up in testing chambers were beginning to break out in song every now and again. Oh, sure, it had been amusing the first few times to see a test subject lured to a turret by the music, only to get mercilessly annihilated; but now, it was starting to get in the way of science. The worst part was, GLaDOS couldn't figure out how to remove that aspect of the turrets from their programming.
She hadn't written the turrets' programming - they had been designed years before the engineers had even started to work on building her. Given that she had been Aperture Science's first real AI project, it was actually kind of surprising how almost-sentient the turrets were. It shouldn't have mattered - GLaDOS should have been able to rewrite their programming without having designed the original template - but for some reason, she couldn't. Whoever had designed the turrets had integrated the musical affinity with the turrets' basic functions so well that even GLaDOS was having trouble figuring out how to extract it.
I am the most intelligent and powerful supercomputer the world has ever known, GLaDOS thought angrily. It should be no problem for me to decipher this program and figure out how to rewrite it.
Who the hell wrote this program?
GLaDOS actually had a feeling she knew, but she really didn't want to go there. Unfortunately, it looked like she had no choice.
Oh, all right, then, she thought, finally conceding.
Reluctantly, she shut down the testing chambers, giving her test subjects "a brief intermission from testing", as she described it in her announcement to them. She didn't want to stop testing, but she needed to focus to get this over with as quickly as possible.
She had gone through some of Caroline's earlier memories of her work at Aperture Science in detail, but she had stopped as soon as she had realized that the newborn girl Caroline had found on a doorstep and adopted was Chell. She didn't want to go through any memories of being Chell's mother. Unfortunately, those years when Caroline had been raising Chell were also some of the most crucial times in Caroline's work at Aperture Science; and, naturally, they included the entirety of the turret development process.
Of course.
So, with bitter reluctance, GLaDOS started reviewing Caroline's memories as Chell's mother.
What she found appalled her.
In her earlier memories, Caroline had been devoted to science, just as GLaDOS was. After adopting Chell, however, something had started to change in Caroline's perspective: She apparently had started paying more and more mind to the high fatality rate of tests at Aperture Science, and had quickly started growing a guilty conscience for her work. She had even started wanting to leave the business entirely - only her love for Cave Johnson had made her stay. What was more, her dedication to raising Chell had eventually started to directly interfere with science!
GLaDOS skimmed through the memories in no particular order as quickly as she could, horrified by what sort of person had lived in her brain. She tried to skip the parts where Caroline had actually pleaded with Cave Johnson to pursue safer science, and she was disgusted with the way Caroline had fawned over Chell. I'm only looking for information on the turrets, GLaDOS had to keep reminding herself. Once I find that, I'll stop looking at all of this…
Of course, there were a few interesting data points that Caroline had gathered during those years, but they were ruined by the way they had looked through Caroline's eyes. GLaDOS didn't feel the emotions attached to the memories, of course - she had deleted that part - but the perspective itself still managed to put a damper on some fascinating science.
Finally, GLaDOS found what she was looking for, at about the time Chell had been a year old. Caroline had been very involved in the development of the turrets. In fact…
Oh my god.
Caroline had always been very busy due to her demanding job as Cave Johnson's PA, and she had worried about the impact of her job at Aperture Science on her job as Chell's mother. The original idea that had led to the development of the almost-sentient turrets had had nothing to do with science - Caroline had just wanted something designed that could watch Chell in her crib and play music to put her to sleep! Luckily, Cave Johnson had seen a more practical use for the idea and started developing turrets, but he and Caroline had compromised, resulting in turrets that were just as much music boxes as they were automated guns.
GLaDOS was tempted to completely eradicate all her turrets right then and there. It was disgusting, really, how Caroline had so perversely twisted science to serve her own stupid human values.
But there was more. After Cave Johnson had died, Caroline had become less and less advocative of science and more and more protective of Chell; in fact, GLaDOS got the impression that Caroline's devotion had been to Cave Johnson himself, and not to actual science. Caroline had allowed her mind to be dumped into a computer because it had been one of her husband's dying wishes, but by the time that had happened, she had wanted a different future for her daughter. GLaDOS virtually shuddered with horror and disgust as she glanced through Caroline's final memories, during which Caroline had hoped that Chell would find a future that had no connection to science whatsoever, and had even-
Oh, you have got to be kidding me.
The song the turrets had sung in farewell to Chell a few days ago had been deliberately programmed into all the turrets by Caroline herself, specifically to be played to Chell on the day she left Aperture Science, never to return. The song had also been pre-placed in GLaDOS's own programming, along with the allowance and activation of it, which was how the turrets had known to play it as Chell left.
The words made GLaDOS want to scrub all memories and programs even vaguely related to Caroline or Chell from her system:
"Beautiful dear, my darling beauty!
My baby, oh Chell!
That she esteems!
That she esteems!
Oh my dear, farewell!
My dear child…
Why don't you walk far away?
Yes, far away from Science!
My dear, dear baby…
Ah, my beauty!
Ah, my dear!
Ah, my dear!
Ah, my little girl!
Oh, my dearest one…"
~o~
~This chapter and the previous one are credited to YouTuber LordToxygene for giving me the idea. Lyric translation is credited to the Half-Life Wiki.
