Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts. It belongs to Square Enix and Disney.


Angel in Disguise

6. Naminé: Secrets

I didn't even notice when Roxas first started acting strangely. In fact, it was actually Sora who pointed it out, which was weird because Sora isn't really the most observant person in the world. He can be really oblivious to many things. Roxas is the same way some times.

Anyway, Sora noticed first and asked me and Kairi to spy on Roxas so that he could know where he had been going. He'd been a little restless ever since he broke his leg, not that I could blame him. I would have been restless too.

I hated all of the secrets. Roxas was hiding where he was going from Sora. Sora was hiding the fact that he was dating Riku. Kairi had only told me about her pen pal, Pence. Kairi was the only one who knew that I had been already accepted at Sunset University, the big art college on the main land. Even Axel was hiding something!

The sheer amount of secrets was overwhelming and somehow I managed to find myself smack dab in the middle of it all. I hated it. Despised it, actually.

We had all known each other since we were little kids! There was no reason for us to be hiding things from each other! And it wasn't like the secrets were embarrassing or really bad or anything. It was the exact opposite; all of the secrets were really good things. I just didn't understand it.

So when Sora asked me and Kairi to find out where Roxas was going, I jumped at the chance. If it meant helping to erase one of the secrets, then I was all for it. So the very day that Sora asked me and Kairi, I followed Roxas around while Kairi went to work. She had a small job at a bookstore at that time so that she would always have extra money.

I was both surprised and pleased when I found out that it was Axel who Sora was meeting. I was glad the Roxas was giving him a chance. It was what I wanted.

A part of me was a little jealous though, I think. The two of them were talking and laughing as if they had been friends all of their lives. Axel getting to hold Roxas's hand weakened my breaking point and then seeing Axel hug Roxas just… I couldn't take it. I had to leave.

Looking back, I now feel like I was being so stupid. It wasn't like we had ever dated or anything. I had always just seen him as my best friend. It wasn't like Kairi's situation, where she had a crush on both Sora and Riku at one time. She probably still did and that was why she was kind of avoiding the two of them.

Roxas had noticed that something wasn't right between the three of them. He's not stupid. I kept telling them and Kairi kept telling them to tell Roxas, but they didn't listen. I suppose that if I were in their shoes then I'd be afraid too. I mean, what if their dating does cause a rift in their families? We knew Roxas was okay with Squall and Cloud being together, but what of his own twin?

There are days when the secrets became too much and I just wanted to scream as loudly as I could. I didn't, of course.

I often wondered how I got to be right in the middle of the secrets. And then I realized that in our circle of friends, Riku was the artsy jock, Roxas was the all-around good guy, Sora was the class clown, Kairi was the art-oriented socialite, Selphie was the gossip queen, Tidus was the Blitzball nut, and Wakka was the big brother.

And me? Somehow I had become the 'rock'; the stabilizing force who was there to help anyone. I kept a cheerful mask up so that the others wouldn't worry about me. They had enough to worry and think about without me adding to their problems.

But then… that was where Roxas came in. Somehow, he always understood. I suppose that in some ways I was his rock and he was mine. It went both ways with us.

Everything was starting to fall apart… and I felt like there was nothing that I could do to stop it.


I found myself at the park just as the sun began to set on the day that I saw Axel and Roxas hanging out. I held my pencil limply in my hand and let my sketchpad rest on the stone wall. There were so many things around me that I could sketch, but at that moment not one thing spoke to me. Not the trees, the bushes, the flowers… not even the sunset itself. I felt so… lost? What I felt was not something that could be described with words.

"Naminé?"

I turned my head. I recognized that voice. "Hello, Marluxia." I said, managing to give him a small smile.

He leaned up against the wall beside me and gave me a curious look. I couldn't help but notice the grocery bags that were dangling from his arms and I figured that Larxene had sent him out shopping again. If anything of what Demyx told me was true about the people in that house, then I wouldn't really trust anyone else with the shopping either.

"You seem distracted." He remarked, tapping my sketchpad. "Problems in paradise, ghostling?"

I shrugged. "Yes and no." I murmured, not wanting him to get involved in the mess. "Nothing we can't work out."

Marluxia raised an eyebrow but didn't press for more information just then. "Demyx wants to know if you're coming over to celebrate his birthday with us. It's tomorrow."

"I'm sorry, Marluxia." I apologized, wishing I could go. "I have some work I need to do. Could you tell Demyx I promise to stop by in a few days to give him his presents?"

Marluxia nodded and shifted the bags on his arms. "I will." He promised. "Now, are you going to tell me what's bothering you so much or am I going to have to tickle it out of you?"

I couldn't help but smile. That was his favorite way to get information out of me. He knew all of my ticklish spots. "Okay, I'll tell you." I said, my smile fading away. "It's about Roxas…"

"Ah," Marluxia said knowingly. "The boyfriend."

I blushed. "He is not!" I protested. "You know very well that he isn't, so cut it out. Besides, with all the time he's been spending with Axel and with how friendly he is with him, it's likely that he prefers guys." I said.

"You sound jealous." Marluxia said teasingly, tapping me on the nose. "A guy can have guy friends and not be gay, you know. Just like a guy can have pink hair and not be gay."

I looked away.

I'll admit that I can be really stubborn when I want to be. I just wish that that wasn't one of those times. Marluxia must have thought I was being such a little girl right then.

"Na'né." He used my camp nickname against me. His voice was so gentle and coaxing that I couldn't help but look up at him. "You love him, don't you?" He asked.

I jerkily pulled away from him. "I do not!" I protested vehemently. "I don't- I can't-" My voice grew weak and less sure. "No!" I screamed. "I can't love him! I can't!"

I felt Marluxia's arms wrap around me and the bags clunked against my sides. I sniffed and buried my face in his shirt. Like always, he smelt of roses and the earth.

I don't know how long we stood there, but I know he stayed with me until I was thinking rationally again. I was thankful for that.

Now, before you get any strange ideas, I was not in love with Marluxia. I loved him, sure, but it was in a sister-brother type of way. He was like a big brother to me. He was definitely as protective as one, which made it weird that approved of Roxas without even knowing him.

I wasn't even in love with Roxas! He was my best friend! We grew up together. I couldn't be in love with him.

Could I?


After my talk with Marluxia, I hurried back to Sora and Roxas's house to tell Sora where Roxas had been going.

"He's been hanging out with Axel?" Sora asked, surprised by the news. "That's great! I was hoping they would get along!" He said giddily. "Hey Ro--"

I quickly covered his mouth with his hand. I wasn't about to let him call Roxas in the room to talk to him. I didn't want Roxas to know that I had spent most of my day following him and Axel around town. "Don't call him in here!" I hissed, taking my hand off his mouth so he could talk.

Sora looked at me in confusion. "Why not?"

"Just don't, please." I said pleadingly. "I don't want him to know that I've been spying on him!"

"Oh." Sora said. "Yeah, okay. I won't tell him I know."

I gave him a hug. "Thanks, Sora."

After that I spent the next ten minutes trying to convince Sora to tell Roxas about him and Riku and then we could tell him that we knew he was hanging out with Roxas. Sora ended up kicking me out of his room while telling me that he wasn't ready for Roxas to know yet.

It was worth a shot, right? I hoped that if we kept trying to convince him and Riku to tell Roxas that eventually they would give in just to get us to stop asking. So far it wasn't working all that well, but I was still hopeful.


End Chapter

You know, I got done writing chapters 10 and 11 on Friday, and I can't help but wonder how many of you are going to want to murder me over what happens in chapter 11.