I can't believe the opulence of the train sent to wisk us off to the capital, me off to my death.
I've come to terms with it already, or so I tell myself. LaMer's don't survive, that's just the way it is.
I'm going to try with everything in me not to lose my humanity, because that's what the Capitol wants , to turn us into animals. But I also won't just lay down and die. I refuse to die at the hands of another tribute. If the Capitol wants me dead they will have to do it themselves and keep trying to tell everyone that this isn't rigged. This all sounds well and good from the privacy of my room on this stinking Capitol train, but I know it won't be easy once I'm faced with the reality of it. So in the meantime I'm going to try to make the most of the time I have left. I slide back into the too soft mattress, and crawl under the silky covers. It's chilly in here, I'm not used to air conditioning. I already miss the sea breeze and salt air, the loud laughter of my brothers, my father's gentle humming as he works on his log books, my own bed with the open windows and billowing mosquito netting, a necessity in our area. I finally let a couple of tears fall, this is the only time I can afford this luxury.
I'm startled out of my moment of self pity by a knock on my door. I quickly wipe my eyes and straighten myself before opening the door to find Finnick standing on the other side.
"Finnick"
"Can I come in for a minute?"
I shrug holding the door wider for him to step inside. Closing the door behind him I wait for him to start.
"What can I say Marina, I'm sorry."
"For what? YOU don't control the reaping Finnick."
He gives me a quick warning look. Of course our rooms are probably monitored. Lovely, I'll feel so comfortable dressing from now on.
"I'm sorry that I've haven't been a better cousin to you, that I haven't been around."
"You have responsibilities . Come on, it's not like I've been deprived. I have brothers and a father."
" I know, and I know that they've prepared you for the Games physically and maybe even mentally. But there are politics and you need sponsors. Make the right people like you and you'll go a long way in helping me get you out of this alive. You're beautiful and unusual, people will want to like you, to love you."
"Beautiful, please. You and I both know, that me becoming a Victor is very unlikely. And what about Turner, your other Tribute? Giving up on him so easily?"
"Marina, he's a 13 year old boy who is small for his age. If I thought for a second he could possibly survive I'd give him everything I have, but you and I know that no matter what he can't possibly make it. And I know you think you can protect him, trust me in this, it never works, there is only one Victor. The most we can hope for him is to give him a little confidence and pray that he doesn't suffer."
"That's disgusting Finnick."
"It's the reality of the situation we're in Marina. Now you need to make a good impression when we reach the Capitol, there will be crowds of people just waiting to see you. You won't have met your stylist yet so ask Violet to help you put something together. Ok?"
"Fine, I'll play it your way for now, but please don't give up on Turner."
Finnick gives me a nod. "Goodnight Marina."
"Goodnight."
I know I'll never sleep yet, and it's not terribly late. I decide that now's as good a time as any to ask Violet for help. Her room is only two doors down from mine.
I knock , hoping I'm not waking her.
"Yes?" I hear on the other side of the door.
"Violet its Marina, may I speak to you?"
The door opens and I almost wouldn't recognize her. Her black hair is brushed out and long, she has removed her makeup, and without it she looks much younger, maybe 23. You also notice her striking dark blue eyes when they are not hidden by false lashes. The most surprising thing about her though, is her bed attire, she is wearing what can only be a large men's shirt. It's a little old and tattered and extremely big on her.
I can't help the little gasp that escapes. "Violet you're beautiful."
Violet's pale skin goes red with a blush. "Thank you Marina." she says almost embarrassed. " If anyone from the Capital ever saw me like this, I'd lose my job. In the capital you don't ever hear compliments on your natural state, only how much you've done to improve yourself. Unless of course you're like yourself and beautiful and from the districts, then they consider natural beauty exotic." She shrugging.
Most of the time I can't understand how the people from the Capitol think, if any of the men from District 4 saw Violet like this, let's just say she'd have a huge fan base.
"What can I help you with Marina?"
"Finnick suggested that I ask you for help with my outfit tomorrow. He said something about the politics behind the games."
"He makes a good point. Of course I'll help you. And you should listen to Finnick he truly does understand the politics. "
Violet and I spend about an hour going through the wardrobe in my room and playing with my hair. Once she's comfortable with how she's going to style me in the morning we say goodnight.
"Thank you Violet, I really appreciate your help."
"I'm here to help you in any way that I can Marina, I mean that. Goodnight."
