So I haven't written in forever, but I felt like writing so here it goes! Thank you to everyone who is still reading this.


Back in the old days, or up until a few months ago, whenever I was upset I would listen to the Jonas's song Black Keys. But because of my new get-over-Nick policy I thought that would be counterproductive. So instead I lay here on my bed in the guesthouse in silence, wishing more then anything that I was in a different place, living a different life.


The one movie I can watch a thousand times without getting tired of it is The Parent Trap. And it's not because I'm a Lindsay Lohan fan.

Really, I just love the idea of being able to go off and live another life. To go see another way your life could have turned out if just one decision had been made differently.

For example, maybe if my Dad had a different job then our family would still be together. Or maybe if my family had eaten dinner together rather then in our separate rooms every night then we would have been closer. Or maybe if I had been different when I first met the Lucas' then I could have been their friend all these years. Or maybe if just a few key moments in my life were altered, and all the stars aligned, and the heavens shined down on me, then maybe just maybe Nick and I could be together.

But all of these maybe's and could-have-been's are nothing now. And the chances of me and Nick ever being together are about as good as me going to an eight week summer camp, finding my long lost twin sister, and getting my parents back together.


"This steak is burnin' up, burnin' up! For you baby!" Joe sang while he cooked the steaks for dinner, which made Stella giggle.

Whenever Stella is around, Joe sings to try and impress her. I used to tell Stella how jealous I was because she always got a private Jonas concert whenever she hung out with them. And of course she would laugh it off and say that Joe was just singing because he loves to. But everyone in the world and their mother knows how they feel about each other.

"Ha-ha very cute Joe, make sure you don't actually burn them!" Stella said.

Stella, Joe, and I were on the back patio preparing for the dinner. Kevin and Nick were inside making salad and other side dishes. In five hours, no matter what happens, this dinner will be over. That thought is the only thing keeping me from having a panic attack.

I was busying myself around the table fixing napkins and plates while Stella fawned over Joe at the grill.

"Stell, have some faith in me!" Joe answered, smiling at her. Stella gazed back into his eyes for a moment. I felt like I was intruding on their moment by being there.

Well at least one of us would have our happy ending with a Lucas.

"Okay you two, break it up!" Nick commanded as he walked onto the patio with some rolls. "How about we all keep our clothes on till after dinner!"

I couldn't help but laugh while Joe and Stella blushed and moved away from each other. Nick flashed a smile at me before setting down the rolls and helping to put silverware on the table.

"Shut up Nick." Joe said quietly. Nick did his best to not laugh out loud.

"Nick can you take over the grilling? Joe needs to change before dinner!" Stella asked, trying to divert attention from Nick's statement.

"What's wrong with these clothes?" Joe asked in a whiny tone. He glanced down at his Jonas apron and jeans before looking back at Stella.

"Joe." Stella said threateningly. Joe glared at her before walking into the house to change. It was like they were already dating. Actually it was like they were already married.

Stella smiled like an approving mother before following him into the house. Nick smiled shaking his head before going to attend to the grill. It was silent for a moment, except for the sizzling of the meat.

"Why do you think they're taking so long to get together?" Nick said aloud. At first I was kind of shocked he was talking to me. After our little dramatic beach conversation we had avoided talking to each other all day. He just kept sending me looks like I held the secrets of the universe.

"I don't know, maybe they're both afraid of being rejected if they say something."

Nick nodded his head like I had said something truly profound. Silence engulfed us again. I didn't really have much to do so I sat at the table and gazed towards the ocean.

I heard a chair scrape next to me. Nick sat down and sighed loudly. His close proximity made my face go all warm. I could smell his familiar cologne and I tried my best to remember every single time he rejected me throughout high school.

"Personally, I think they should just go for it! What have they got to lose? For all they know they could be soul mates." He said quietly. I looked at the ocean before answering.

"Because they're time together will end. No matter what, it will end. Everything does." I replied without thinking. I looked over and found Nick studying me. I felt like I had revealed too much with that statement. I stared a minute longer before looking away. My eyes had began tearing up.

"Macy," Nick said seriously, "things only end if better things are beginning."

I looked at Nick with tears in my eyes and smiled. His words sounded almost poetic. For a moment, it felt like everything might be alright.

Nick touched my shoulder gently before getting up. It seemed his touched lingered a little longer than necessary. He then turned and went back to the grill.

"We're back and we're fabulous." Stella announced as she and Joe stepped onto the patio. Joe had ditched the apron and was now dressed in a nice shirt and shorts. He struck a pose before runway walking to the grill to resume cooking.


I remember taking a philosophy class my freshman year. One philosophy that has stuck with me for all this time is Murphy's Law: Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.


It turns out the blonde's name is Carrie. She is a teacher who became one of my dad's clients when someone tried to steal her identity through a credit account.

My dad at least had the decency to introduce her as a close friend and client to the rest of the group. Even he knows admitting that she was his mistress that he left his family for doesn't sound very honorable.

At the moment, the blonde (I can't bring myself to call her by name) is regaling Kevin and Nick with the tale of how my father saved her from losing her life savings by finding who was trying to steal her identity.

"If it wasn't for him I would be living in some dingy apartment living off pizza scraps!" Carrie exclaimed while placing a hand on my dad's shoulder.

I choked on the water I was drinking at that moment. The four of them looked at me with concern but I waved at them motioning that I was alright. I couldn't help but realize that the future my dad saved the blonde from was the reality my mom and I were living. Bitterness rose in my chest to unruly heights. A few more comments like that from Carrie and I wasn't going to make it through dinner.


The feeling of hate is much more powerful than I imagined it to be. Feeling hurt by someone but still loving them is another beast entirely. But hating someone, truly wishing that all the wrongs they committed would come back to strike them a thousand times harder, is something much different.


"That's a beautiful dress you have on Macy." Carrie commented. I glanced up at her in surprise.

I hadn't said more than two words to her yet. When my dad and Carrie arrived at the mansion I welcomed them in and said hello. I was careful to not seem overly friendly but I kept my voice even so not to tip off the others that anything was wrong.

Up until this moment, the Lucas' and Stella had kept a constant commentary going with the two so that I didn't have to say anything. My plan of avoidance and silence was working well. And honestly I didn't think Carrie would have the guts to address me directly. There is no way she doesn't realize what her presence has done to my life. To my mother's life.

Instead of telling her all of this and confronting her over the steak dinner, I simply replied, "Thank you, my mother bought it for me."

Carrie's face faltered for a moment but became unreadable as she returned to her dinner. I could see my father sending me a look across the table but I really didn't care. Was mentioning his wife insulting to his mistress or something?

Stella and Nick were shooting me confused looks while Kevin and Joe remained oblivious, completely entranced by their food.

"So… who is responsible for this delicious steak?" My dad asks, no doubt trying to get past the awkward silence.

"That would be me!" Joe says through his mouth full of food. My dad nodded at him in recognition.

"You are a great cook Joe. Tommy is an amazing cook too, don't you think Macy?" Carrie asked with a smile. I couldn't tell if she was being sincere or if she was intentionally flaunting the fact that she was the one he cooked for now.

"Well you know he hasn't really cooked for me or my mom for awhile so I couldn't say." I responded coldly. Now everyone at the table seem to sense the tension. It was funny that such a warm and sunny evening was slowly being ruined by storm clouds of anger and resentment.

"Am I missing something…"Kevin whispered to Nick. Nick shushed him and everyone continued eating in an awkward silence. But the pent up feelings I held toward my dad were hard to hold back. It felt as if one more push would send me over the edge.

My Dad cleared his throat before asking, "So, how was your mother when you last saw her?"

With that, I broke.


I remember one really tough basketball game I played in before I quit sports. The score was tight, it was winding down to the last few minutes of the game, and everyone was being overly aggressive. The girl I was guarding was a little too pushy. She kept taking cheap shots whenever the referee wasn't looking. I was beyond frustrated and I was ready to start pushing right back, but then I caught a glimpse of my Dad's face in the stands. He shook his head just a little, seeming to say, "Don't give in."

From that little shake of the head, I recalled what he had told me once before.

"In sports, and in life, there is a time and place to fight back. You alone have to decide whether it is worth it."

Well it was about time I start pushing back Dad.


I threw my fork on the plate and stood up abruptly. The scrape of my chair made everyone freeze.

"Are you kidding me?" I asked quietly. My voice had taken on a scary quality. My dad looked taken aback.

"How is she? How do you think she is?" My voice was steadily getting louder. My dad looked around like I was embarrassing him.

"Macy this is hardly the time or place." My dad said calmly. I laughed humorlessly then pointed to Carrie.

"This became the time and place when you brought your lover to dinner! I don't hear from you for months and the first thing you do is throw it in my face that you are fine? That you don't care that you left a daughter and a wife behind? That you can't admit you weren't man enough to be a father and husband?" I sneered.

Well, so much for acting like nothing was wrong.

My Dad looked like he had been slapped. His face was pale and frozen in shock. Carrie didn't look much different. By now I was starting to feel a little self-conscious of our audience. Stella had a thousand emotions on her face, from realization to anger to sadness. Joe and Kevin looked stunned and uncomfortable. While Nick was staring at me with an intense look of concern. I stared back into his eyes for a moment longer before turning back to my Dad. He looked sad, so so sad.

"Mace…" he whispered. But I put up a hand to stop him.

"This time, I get to leave." With that, I walked off the patio and into the house as fast as I could. I swiped one of the Lucas' car keys and ran the rest of the way to the garage. Before I could peel out of the driveway the passenger door opened and Stella jumped in. She gave me a look of understanding before saying, "Let's get out of here."

I didn't need to be told twice.


Meh! I felt that Macy deserved the chance to finally confront her father. What will happen now that everyone knows whats going on? Review please!