Arnold opened the door to Helgas room and tossed the bag onto the bed. She looked at him curiously and he closed the door behind him.
"You're being released into my care today." He said.
"Why?" She asked.
"Well the hospital feels there is nothing for you to gain by staying here." He said.
"I don't want to go with you. I want to go home." She said.
"With your dad?" He asked.
"No." She said stubornly.
"Then where are you planning on going?" He asked.
"I don't know." She said with a sigh.
"Helga, there's something you're not telling me...a lot you're not telling me actually. What really happened?" He asked sitting down in his usual chair.
"I told you he offered me a ride." She said.
"You were a lot of things when we were eleven Helga, but stupid wasn't one of them." He pointed out.
"I just want to be free." She said.
"You are, you'll have so many opportunities at the hospital I work at." He said.
"How long do I have to stay there?" She asked.
"I don't know." He admitted.
"How much more of my life do I have to give up?" She asked.
He took a deep breath, she was angry and upset. He understood that of course, but what he didn't understand was what happened to her all those years ago. The Helga he once knew never would have gotten into a car with a man she didn't know. She was going to put up a fight being at the hospital and he knew that.
"Look, if you cooperate with me there's no reason you can't be out and on your own in as little as six months." He said.
She shook her head and he saw the brokeness in her eyes. She didn't want to go and he knew it, but regardless of their history he had to be proffesional about this.
"Helga, I want to make this easy for you, I want to help you." He said gently.
"Then just let me go." She said.
"I can't do that. I have to be sure you're not a danger to yourself or others." He said.
She looked away from him chewing on her bottom lip. He sighed standing up.
"I'll give you a few minutes to change." He said and she didn't acknowledge him.
He waited outside until the door opened and she stepped into the hallway. Her IV had been removed earlier that morning. She was skinny and frail looking, her long blonde hair fell in curls over her shoulders and down her back. The dark blue sweatpants and gray t-shirt from the hospital were baggy on her.
"I'll get you a wheel chair...you shouldn't be walking." He said.
She didn't say anything and when he reached for her she shrugged him off. So this was how she wanted to play it? She was going to go back into her shell and wait for him to break down and release her. He shook his head as he watched her walk towards his car. Her body was weakened from going a few days without food, and he was concerened about the strain. He opened the car door for her and she slid wordlessly onto the seat.
She was silent the entire ride to the hospital and he could almost feel her physically closing off. He pulled up infront of massive building and shut off his car.
"It's not a bad as it looks on the outisde." He promised.
Her blue eyes scanned the tall brick building. It was covered in vines and looked ridiculously cold. This was the place that they were sending her, salvation was supposed to be found inside those doors.
"It's another cage." She said softly.
"Helga..."He started to speak she interrupted him.
"I won't stay here."
"You don't have a choice." He said gently.
He got out and walked around to open her door. He offered her a hand to help her out and she ignored him. She walked slowly up the stairs toward the building like a lamb to the slaughter, and she felt more guilty about bringing her here with every step.
He opened the door to the main hall and as she stepped inside all of the other residents turned to lok at her. She didn't seem to notice their attention and he waved to Claire who was speaking to a patient.
"There's someone I want you to meet." He said, and once again Helga ignored him.
Claire smiled at Arnold as she moved to join them as he spoke.
"Claire this is Helga, Helga this is Claire, My mentor." He said.
"It's nice to finally meet you Helga." Claire said.
Helga didn't reply instead she stood looking around the room at the other patients. Her eyes were mostly blank and her expression wasn't readable.
"It's been a long day." Arnold said.
"I can imagine...Why don't you go ahead and get her settled into her room." Claire said.
"Come on Helga." Arnold said taking her arm.
He pulled her down the hall passed the patients that lingered in the hallways, including one who was eating wallpaper. Another patient sat on the floor gripping his head and rocking back and forth. Arnold pointed at him and an orderly rushed to pick him up. Helga winced as she moved down the seemingly endless hallway. Finally they came to a room and Arnold opened the door motioning her to go inside.
The walls were white, the floor was white, against the right wall was a twin size bed with blue and white bedding. Other than the bed the room was void of furniture. She moved immediately to the window. She put her hand against the glass. There were bars on the other side but she didn't seem to mind.
"The window won't open." Arnold said.
She leaned her forehead against the glass and looked like the picture of pure empty, loneliness. He wanted to touch her but he didn't. Instead he left his working mind take over.
"I'll be back to get you around three for lunch. Feel free to walk around and get to know the place." He said.
He closed the door behind him and stepped back into the hall way. Claire was waiting a few feet away and he offered her a tired smile.
"How is she?" Claire asked.
"She's relapsing, bad." Arnold admitted.
"Arnold she's been through a lot. It's going to be up and down with her. Just keep trying." Claire said.
"I'm worried about her. Yesterday she seemed a little more relaxed today...I can see it in her eyes, She's like a wild animal in a cage. She's going to lash out anytime now." He said.
"She's angry...she wouldn't be human if she wasn't." Claire said.
"I know. Have you seen Leon today?" Arnold asked.
"He was in the main hall last time I saw him." Claire said.
"Thanks I'm going to talk to him about yesterday, I'll catch you later." Arnold said.
"I'm sure you will." Claire said with a laugh.
Arnold found Leon in the main hall pretending to be dusting. A few inches away from him sat Irene reading a book. Every so often Leon would say something to her and she would answer. If he kept up the pretend cleaning she wouldn't know she was being watched.
"Leon, Can I speak with you a minute?" Arnold asked.
"Sure thing." Leon put down the rag he was using to dust, and Irene picked up her book.
They walked to the other end of the room before Arnold spoke double checking to be sure Irene wasn't watching them.
"How's it going with Irene?" Arnold asked.
"Seems to be going okay. I got her to eat a little yesterday." Leon said.
"I saw that good work." Arnold said.
"She's an awful nice lady." Leon said shaking his head.
"I'm sure she is. She's been through a lot." Arnold said.
"I know. I hate to think of any woman being mistreated, especially one like Miss Irene." Leon said.
"Well they just don't make men like you anymore Leon." Arnold said.
"You're a good man too, I've never once seen you even raise your voice." Leon said.
"Yeah, well we're not extinct yet." Arnold said.
"Miss Irene seems to think so anytime I move to fast she flinches away." Leon said with a sigh.
"She'll come around just keep...keep doing what you're doing." Arnold said.
"For how long?" Leon asked.
"Until...she doesn't need you too. "Arnold said.
Arnold was in his office reading over the release papers for one of his younger patients. He scratched his head before tossing down his pen. The two nights he spent at the hospital in the plastic chair were catching up with him. He needed rest and his back ached. He pushed back his chair and glanced at his watch. Helga was in the main hall spenging time getting used to her surroundings. Lunch wasn't for another hour, he decided a nap would be okay. He moved to the small couch in the corner of his office and stretched out. It felt good to lay flat for once, and soon he was asleep.
The screams and shouts woke him from a deep sleep. He jumped and rolled off the small couch with a thud onto the hard floor. Wincing at the pain in his back he stood and rushed from his office. The noise was coming from the main hall, and somehow he knew it was Helga. He stepped into the hall and looked around.
Leon had pushed Irene and a few other reisdents behins him into a corner. A few more ran about screaming, and Claire was talking to Helga. Helga was sitting at a table with a pair of scissors.
"Helga..."Arnold said her name, but she didn't look at him.
"Helga, put the scissors down." Clarie said gently.
"I'm not trying to kill myself." Helga said stubbornly.
"Helga...what are you doing?" Arnold asked moving closer.
"I'm not trying to kill myself." She said again.
"Okay, what are you doing?" He asked.
"I haven't had a hair cut in fifteen years..." She said holding up a ridiculously long handful of hair.
"HELGA!" Before he could stop her she snipped.
The handful of hair fell to the ground and she quickly snipped another handful. He watched her with a sinking feeling, she was defintiely struggling. After three more snips, two large orderlies approached on grabbed her arm and pried the scissors loose, but the damaged was done. Her once long hair that hung in gold silk past her hips, was now a choppy cut that hung just an inch or two below her shoulders.
"LET GO OF ME!" She screamed as the men dragged her from the chair.
"Take her to her room." Arnold said with a sigh.
As they dragged her down the hall she kicked, and screamed her protest. Once the door to her room was securely locked she began beating on it and screaming.
"Arnold...are you okay?" Claire asked.
"I'll be fine. Just a relapse." He said forcing a smile.
He bent to pick up the long satin strands of hair and Claire winced.
"We'll have someone clean this up. Why don't you go home? Get some rest." She said gently.
"No, this is going to be harder than I thought. I need to be here for her." He said.
"You're no good to her if you're burned out." Claire said.
"I thought...that if I got her here with me..."He trailed.
"I know you thought it'd make it all better. It will, but she needs time." Claire said.
"Maybe you're right, I'm tired." He said.
"I am, you go home and get some sleep and a shower. I'll stay here and make sure nothing else happens. If I need you I'll call." She promised.
"Thanks, I'll see you tomorrow." He said tossing down the long handful of hair he had been holding.
"See you tomorrow." She said with a smile.
He waved at Leon on his way out the door, and when he reached his car realized how tired he truly was. Tomorrow he'd come back refreshed and ready to battle her demons, whatever it cost however long it took, he was in this for the long haul.
READ AND REVIEW
