A/N: Ren here. (Hi people!)

Okay, I keep on forgetting to say this, so sorry. Anyway, I realize that in this story Temari is not put in a necesarily...'positive light.' We aren't intentionally bashing her, it's just that this is from Ino's POV, so to her, Temari is the enemy. And Sakura goes a long with it because she's the supportive friend.

Yeah, I LIKE Temari. I like ALL of the charecters, actually.

So, yeah. Just wanted to clear that up. And thank all of you guys for the wonderful support, it's really nice to see. Thank you all, and I hope you enjoy.

The Eccentric Files

Act6: Explosion

From: xxRamenNinjaxx

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: The Bastard who likes to call himself 'Sasuke'

Hey Sakura-chan!

I realize that this is probably a bad time, seeing as you and Sasuke have—what, three days?—to finish your final project for math.

Oh wait; I'm in your group too, aren't I?

I'll be moral support! (Please? I'll treat you to ramen!)

Anyway, I think something's up with The Bastard. I mean, more then usual—I don't think we can write this one off as PMS. So seriously, do you have any idea what's wrong with the loser? He sort of broke Kiba's arm in gym today. Well, maybe he didn't break it, but the last I saw of him Kiba was in the nurse's office.

Seriously, how can someone 'accidentally' hit someone in the head with a chair? (But it was pretty funny, all the cheerleaders are seriously afraid of Sasuke now. I laugh at him in all his bitchy-ness.)

You go over to his house today, don't you? Okay, a word of warning: Sasuke doesn't like it when you throw ramen at his ceiling. Almost ripped my ear off when I did that. Jeez, control freak.

The very awesome number one ninja,

--Naruto


From: GreenEyed07

To: xxRamenNinjaxx

Subject: Who likes to call himself Sasuke? What else would he be called, Ernest?

Sasuke-kun and I knew beforehand that you weren't gonna do anything. But I'll take up that offer on the ramen.

He broke Kiba's arm?! Remind me to stab him when I get to his house. I said that he was jealous since I'm dating Kiba, but he got all pissy on me. Seriously, I think he would've been less mad if I had shoved a stick up his ass.

Naruto, NO ONE likes to have ramen thrown at their ceiling. You're lucky your nuts are still intact.

--Sakura


From: xxRamenNinjaxx

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: I like to call him 'Blech' myself

Thank you O Wonderful Math Goddess, please be kind to my Geometry grade. And um, I can come over to Sasuke's with you if you want, though he might refuse to let me inside. And what the hell is with people and ramen on their ceiling? It is ARTWORK I tell you! Ramen noodles dry in very interesting patterns. Plus they make the room smell good. He is just a NEAT-FREAK.

I've always known that Sasuke was an over-reacting, melodramatic, hormonal teenager. I mean, violence is not the answer man—

Wait.

YOU'RE DATING KIBA?! WHAT THE HELL?! I THOUGHT YOU WEREN'T ALLOWED TO DATE UNTIL YOU WERE MARRIED! WE MADE A PINKY PROMISE IN KINDERGARTEN! WHY ARE YOU DATING KIBA?! WHY?! WHY CRUEL WORLD?!

I'm going to BREAK. HIS. OTHER. ARM.

The supremely pissed off but still number one ninja,

--Naruto


From: GreenEyed07

To: xxRamenNinjaxx

Subject: Don't let his fan girls hear you call him that

Oh ew, I am DEFINATELY not a math goddess. You're right, Sasuke-kun probably wouldn't let you come inside, but you can try, since every time we speak we always wind up fighting. Kind of like you and him.

Yes, Naruto, I AM dating Kiba. And there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with us dating.

...Naruto, that was K-I-N-D-E-R-G-A-R-T-E-N. Back then I thought every boy but you had cooties.

And if you touch Kiba, you're on ramen restriction for two weeks.

--Sakura


From: xxRamenNinjaxx

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: Those THINGS scare the crap out of me

Oh whatever, in my eyes you are since I still need a calculator for long division. Do not tell Sasuke that, he will gloat. And then rub it in my face. And then I will have to throw ramen at his ceiling again—and I don't know if I can survive his wrath again.

Seriously, he is violent. We should get him a gift certificate to a yoga class or something.

How bad is the fighting with Sasuke by the way? He gets pretty nasty when he's upset—I can, um, try to beat him up for you.

Or just throw an egg at him and run for my life—like I did in fifth grade.

Okay, you can date Kiba. Kiba is cool—yes. Kiba will not touch you inappropriately without your consent. I think.

You know, he really wouldn't be able to touch you if he couldn't move either of his arms. But okay, I'll leave you guys alone. Mostly.

And when we were in kindergarten, I seem to remember that pinky promises lasted FOREVER. What happened to that? (You seriously thought I was the only one who didn't have cooties? I feel so special. I AM GOING TO RUB THIS IS SASUKE'S FACE.)

Don't you dare take my ramen from me. I start getting twitchy after three days—I don't even want to think about what'll happen in two weeks.

The cootie-free number one ninja,

--Naruto


From: xxRamenNinjaxx

To: Uchiha723

Subject: COOTIES ATTACK!

Sakura-chan thinks you have cooties. It appears that you will, indeed, die a virgin.

Don't freak out on her when she comes over to your place to work on your math project in a few hours. Seriously, obsessive cleaning is not very attractive.

Dude, why the hell did you break Kiba's arm? I'm enrolling you in an anger-management class.

The number one ninja,

--Naruto


From: Uchiha723

To: xxRamenNinjaxx

Subject: Moron

Just because I don't live in filth does not mean that I clean obsessively, idiot.

I didn't break Kiba's arm, the idiot brought it upon himself.

And I don't have cooties.

--Sasuke

P.S. Knock it off with the ninja crap.

P.P.S. I am going to kill you about the egg thing. The next time you climb up a tree and launch yourself at my window, wait until I open it—don't just crash through the glass. You're paying for that by the way. And for my appointment with the hairstylist to get the damn yolk out of my hair.


From: xxRamenNinjaxx

To: Uchiha723

Subject: Bastard

SASUKE HAS COOTIES!

The still number one ninja, pay no attention to the peanut gallery,

—Naruto


From: Uchiha723

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: Naruto

I didn't break Kiba's arm and I don't have cooties. I need you to come over at 6:30 instead of 6—I need a haircut.

--Sasuke


From: GreenEyed07

To: xxRamenNinjaxx

Subject: I seem to remember being one of those fangirls, Uzumaki Naruto

A yoga class? You must be joking. I'd bet that after fifteen minutes of having to do Pilates, Sasuke-kun would probably kill the instructor.

I know how he gets when he's mad, but I've handled him. And I think I made him sorry, though God knows he'd never utter those words. I can handle him myself, Naruto, but thanks anyway.

No, you WILL leave us alone. Sasuke-kun does that whole I'm-watching-you-Inuzuka-so-if-you-touch-her-I'll-know-about-it-and-I'll-kill-you thing enough, I don't need you added to the mix as well. Our relationship is complicated enough.

But maybe while Kiba and I are busy, you can go hang out with Hinata-chan.

Once again, Naruto, that was K-I-N-D-E-R-G-A-R-T-E-N. I was five. And Sasuke-kun told me that you told him about that whole cootie thing.

That's it, mister-- I'm not making you my specialty ramen for five days.

--Sakura


From: GreenEyed07

To: Uchiha723

Subject: I'll kill him later

I know you don't have cooties, Sasuke-kun. Pay no mind to Naruto; he's just gloating over the fact that when we were in Kindergarten (KINDERGARTEN!) I thought every boy but him had cooties.

Why do you need a haircut? Your hair looks perfectly fine to me. It's not getting long, or anything. Is it getting in your eyes...?

--Sakura


From: xxRamenNinjaxx

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: I was just kidding now…don't get out the blow-torch…

But I want to see Sasuke in the 'dead possum' and 'peeing dog' positions or whatever the hell they're called. THINK ABOUT IT SAKURA-CHAN!

Sakura-chan, I don't think Sasuke knows how to be sorry. His manufactures forgot to program the emotion into him. (I don't care what you say, I still think he's a genetically engineered robot-freak. He can probably spit acid and shoot lasers from his eyes.) But seriously, the only three emotions I have ever seen on him are angry-bored, angry-sad, and angry-HEAR-ME-ROAR!

I didn't know you knew about me and Hinata-chan. Um... I have a question that I think you, as a female, will be able to answer. Why is it that Hinata flips out whenever I try to give her a ring? I thought girls like jewelry/shiny stuff. It wasn't half as bad when I gave her a coupon to ramen.

Sasuke TOLD on me about the cooties thing? What is he, like, five?! "Oh no, teacher, teacher! Naruto stole my red crayon again!"

Whatever, that crayon was mine and it was crimson according to Crayola.

The number one ninja,

Naruto

P.S. DO NOT WITHHOLD THE RAMEN FROM ME, WOMAN! MY LEFT HAND IS ALREADY TWITCHING.

P.P.S. I am never going to let that crayon thing go. Seriously. He was such a teachers-pet.


From: Uchiha723

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: Please do.

Why was Naruto exempt from the cooties paranoia? He was dirty. He rolled in the mud. And ate it. I was very clean and did not have cooties—I even shared the red crayon with you sometimes.

Due to recent encounters with the moronic dip-shit sometimes known as 'Naruto', I have egg yolk lodged in my hair. And it is not coming out. So I'll see you in two hours.

--Sasuke


From: GreenEyed07

To: xxRamenNinjaxx

Subject: Don't tempt me

...you're stupid. "Peeing dog" position?! In yoga?! I'll have to make Hinata-chan take YOU to a yoga class, so that you can learn the proper names.

I think you've been watching too many Sci-Fi movies. Sasuke-kun, for the last time, is NOT a robot. The only reason YOU ever see those emotions is because you're stupid enough to provoke his anger.

Hmm... probably because when you propose, you give your girlfriend a ring. But we DO like jewelry. Try giving her a necklace-- she won't flip out as bad. Or earrings.

Naruto, LET IT GO. You WERE the one who stole the crayon, because I was watching you two. You took it from his 64-crayon box and then swore vehemently that it was yours.

--Sakura

P.S- Good. You know how when little kids are bad, they get put in time-out? Well, consider me not making you my ramen that you love so much as time-out.

P.P.S- He wasn't a teachers pet. You're just sore because his finger painting was nicer than yours.


From: GreenEyed07

To: Uchiha723

Subject: But isn't that YOUR job to kill him?

Well, Naruto was my first friend there. And he was nicer than you were. The times that you shared your red crayon with me were very rare-- all the other times you were just mean to me and called me worthless. AND you made fun of my drawings!

Now I remember why I hated you so much. MY HOUSE WAS DEFINATELY PRETTIER THAN YOURS!

How in the seven hells did Naruto get YOLK in your hair?! What'd he do, throw an egg through the window?

--Sakura


From: xxRamenNinjaxx

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: SIR, YESSIR!

DO NOT MAKE ME GO TO YOGA CLASS! I FEAR ENYA AND OTHER SLEEP-INDUCING MUSIC!

Like seriously, how do they expect you to RELAX when your head has somehow managed to touch your spine?!

Look, name THREE TIMES when Sasuke hasn't been sulking/angry/depressed. Robot I tell you. And he has an aversion to water—a CLEAR INDICATOR that he's worried his hard-drive is going to zap.

Plus, he can like, multiply ridiculously large numbers in his head. That isn't normal. It's the built in calculator in his brain, savvy?

Hey, Sakura-chan—is it a bad thing that Hinata has suddenly taken said ring and is demanding, (I seriously didn't think that was even possible) I meet her family? Do you normally do that when you date someone? Because I've known you for YEARS and I've NEVER see your 'rents.

Concerning the crimson crayon: Kindergarten is all about SHARING. Sasuke needed to GET. OVER. IT. It was ONE crayon—and I was only borrowing it! It's not my fault the dork carried 64 crayons around with him, unlike us, who had 12.

The number one ninja who can borrow crayons whenever he pleases,

--Naruto

P.S. F-Fine! I DON'T NEED YOU!

(Seriously, I need my ramen. I tried making the instant stuff a minute ago and burned the water.)

P.P.S. If Sasuke's finger painting was better than mine, then it was better than yours too. And he was a total teachers pet. He actually brought her an apple on the first day of school. I thought they only did that in cartoons.


From: Uchiha723

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: He heals too quickly, it's getting boring. Your turn.

How exactly did you two become friends?

Wait.

That was about the red crayon, wasn't it? The one he STOLE from me? And then when the teacher said he couldn't have any of that days snack, (in punishment) you shared your cookies with him.

I shared the red crayon with you a lot. You were holding the record at seven times. And your drawings WERE pathetic. You drew a ninja princess every single time.

--Sasuke

P.S. Your house didn't have a chimney. Mine did. It was obviously superior. I can show you the two drawings for proof.

P.P.S. Naruto throwing an egg through my window is not that surprising.


From: GreenEyed07

To: xxRamenNinjaxx

Subject: DID YOU JUST CALL ME SIR?!

Hey! Enya is very pretty. Have you ever listened to Only Time? It's a beautiful song. Oh Naruto, they make you put your legs behind your head and stuff. I can put my head to my spine; all you gotta do is lean your head back and you're touching the base of it.

1) All seven times he leant me his crayon. He wasn't being mean THEN.

2) When I crashed into him, he asked if I was okay.

3) The first day we came to school.

Naruto, I've WATCHED him drink water. And the numbers may seem big to YOUR tiny brain, but they're really not all that big. Besides, Sasuke-kun is the second smartest kid in school.

No, you meeting Hinata-chan's family isn't bad if you're dating her; after all, I've met Kiba's family. And there is a very good reason why you haven't met my family.

The more crayons you have, the prettier the picture. (Even though my drawings TOTALLY owned his; I don't care what he says. ISN'T THAT RIGHT, NARUTO?!)

--Sakura

P.S- Alright, I'll come over your house tomorrow and make you some, since you obviously can't function properly without me.

P.P.S- You're just mad because when YOU brought the teacher an apple the next day, when she bit into it she took off a good chunk of a worm that was in there.


From: GreenEyed07

To: Uchiha723

Subject: Oh thank you, kind sir. Would you like me to lick your boots for you while you're being so gracious?

Well, I felt bad for him. And besides, he looked kinda lonely.

NUH-UH! I drew a unicorn a couple of times! AND I SEEM TO REMEMBER YOU DRAWING KNIGHTS, BUDDY BOY! My ninja princess' were TOTALLY better than yours, you jerk.

--Sakura

P.S- My house didn't have a chimney because I had a chiminea outside!

P.P.S- Okay, Naruto throwing an egg through your window ISN'T surprising. But you didn't answer my question.


From: xxRamenNinjaxx

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: You know very well that I get my pronouns mixed up

Enya sounds like a bunch of people mooing. With harps and pianos and whatever freaky instruments they use going on in the background.

I just tried to put my legs behind my head. I lost my balance and fell off the chair—there was a snapping noise. It might've had to do with me landing in the splits. I don't think I'll be able to walk for a while.

Hey. I just noticed something—all three of the above times were happening to you. Why is it that you get all the luck?! And dude—Sasuke let you use the crimson crayon? I didn't think that anyone other than him was allowed to BREATHE on his stuff. He never let ME use his crayons.

I still say he's a robot. He twitches a lot when you poke his sides—probably a glitch in the system. I mean, it has to be that. The other possibility is that he's ticklish, and that possibility is just too horrible for me to contemplate.

Um, I just realized that by meeting Hinata's family, I'll have to eat politely. SAKURA-CHAN, WE HAVE A PROBLEM. I have this feeling that they might eat me if I throw ramen at their ceiling.

I think that my drawings were better than yours AND Sasuke's. But yeah, the ninja babes you drew were pretty hot, I must say. What was it that he was always drawing again? I can't remember.

Number one ninja,

Naruto

P.S. THANK YOU, I PROMISE TO BEHAVE FROM NOW ON, OH LOVELY RAMEN COOKING GODDESS.

P.P.S. My apple was better. It had protein.


From: Uchiha723

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: Don't. These are new shoes.

Whatever. You obviously know mine were better since your flipping out over it. And those things with four legs were unicorns? I thought they were cows.

I'll see you in thirty minutes. Bring a protractor, I can't find mine.

--Sasuke

P.S. Your roof was the same color as the building. It looked like a giant blob. I have the picture sitting right next to me—I would know.

P.P.S. The egg yolk's out now, it doesn't matter what the idiot did. But now my hair is sticking up in the back.


From: GreenEyed07

To: xxRamenNinjaxx

Subject: Excuses excuses

I should most definitely be offended by that. Enya is pretty! When I come over there tomorrow you are DEFINATELY listening to it. I'll make you listen to it.

Yeah, I think the only person Sasuke-kun is actually nice to is ME. I wonder why that is...?

Duh, Naruto, of COURSE he's ticklish. Tickle his feet-- it'll make him squeal like a little girl. (Trust me, I did that once and I thought it was INO.)

Naruto, if you throw ramen at the Hyuuga's ceilings they'd probably do something that involves knives and your butt. You probably DON'T wanna know.

Alright, this weekend I'll teach you the proper etiquette on how to eat. AND I'll obviously have to pick your clothes out for you too, since knowing you you'd probably just go there in a t-shirt and jeans and think it's acceptable.

He liked to draw knights. And please, my ninja princess' TOTALLY pwned yours like, tenfold.

--Sakura

P.S- Damn right you'll behave.

P.P.S- Sure, if you can count eating worms as having protein. Cause, y'know, that's JUST how I like my apples-- it's the same way I like my cereal boxes, with the little surprise inside.


From: GreenEyed07

To: Uchiha723

Subject: I wasn't REALLY going to lick your shoes. I'd rather stab myself

You know, just for insulting my unicorns AND my houses, I should totally skip going over your house.

Well, Kiba said that I could always go over HIS if I wanted to. Hmmm...

--Sakura

P.S- Sasuke, your hair's ALWAYS stuck up in the back. What are you, blind?!


From: xxRamenNinjaxx

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: I'm good with them.

Fine, I'll listen to your hippie music. But I'm mooing along.

This is true, he is relatively nice to you compared to others. Dang. You must scare the hell out of him or something. He's been pretty nasty lately though—ever since you started dating Kiba—

OH.

SASUKE'S GOT A CRUSH! SASUKE'S GOT A CRUSH!

I am never letting him live this down.

Wait—you KNEW he was ticklish and you never TOLD me?! I thought we were best friends Sakura-chan! WHERE IS THE LOVE?! Okay, we have to gang up on him. I'll hold him down, you tickle his feet. I seriously have to hear this squealing. How did you manage to tickle his feet anyway? Was this a while ago? Cause he's a lot bigger now, and the two of you only started really interacting a few months ago.

I knew I should have gone to manners school. Seriously. I think Neji might spread rumors about me or something…

Sakura-chan, I'm scared! Hold me!

Ninja-dude,

--Naruto

P.S. My lygers ATE your ninja babes and trampled Sasuke's knights.

P.P.S. Ew…last time I eat breakfast with YOU…


From: xxRamenNinjaxx

To: Uchiha723

Subject: It's a secret….

SASUKE LIKES SAKURA, SASUKE LIKES SAKURA!

Oh, and I told her you did.

You know, it's probably a good thing that you can't touch me right now. And I should probably not click the 'send' button. But I'm going to anyway.

Time to re-locate…

Ninja to the extreme,

--Naruto


From: Uchiha723

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: Don't bleed on me.

Do not listen to Naruto. Ever. Or Kiba.

And if you don't come over then I won't work on the project and we'll both fail Geometry. Get over here.

--Sasuke

P.S. My hair looks like a duck's ass. Before now it just kind of flipped out a little. I feel like some sort of retarded comic book character Naruto likes to read about.


From: GreenEyed07

To: xxRamenNinjaxx

Subject: Obviously, since you called me SIR and are thinking you're gonna get away with it

Naruto, if you moo, you will NEVER be able to have little blond-haired idiots running around. And that's a PROMISE.

WHAT?! Me and Sasuke-kun?! No, he doesn't like me like that, Naruto. He's ALWAYS been unpleasant. He's always hated Kiba, too, so he's just mad because one of his... acquaintances is dating one of his enemies.

I found out on accident. I was over his house and talking on the phone with Ino cause we were working on the Geometry project and my toe brushed the bottom of his foot and I heard this girlish scream and I thought it was Ino, but it wasn't. My last choice was Sasuke-kun, obviously, but he looked tensed, so I figured it out. And he made me promise on pain of death that I'd NEVER mention it aloud again.

Neji isn't that kind of guy! I think.

Naruto, if I held you, you'd probably crush me; you're too damn tall!

--Sakura


From: GreenEyed07

To: Uchiha723

Subject: Jeez, bloodophobe much?

Since when do I listen to Naruto? And what does Kiba have to do with this?

Or you could always come to me, instead of being such a freaking alpha male.

--Sakura

P.S- Actually, before it looked like a CHICKEN'S ass. But your little "hair flippy thing" is what we call a cowlick. Get it?


From: Uchiha723

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: Whatever

Just get over here, will you? I need you to eat some turkey—the lady next door keeps on thinking that she needs to feed me and I don't want to just throw it away.

--Sasuke

P.S. It's sticking up at a ninety degree angle. It was maybe half this bad before.


To: Ino

From: Sakura

So, how goes it with PH and McDonalds? Talk to me, because I hate Geometry. Which is why I'm texting you. SO...BORED...


To: Sakura

From: Ino

All is well. I kick ass at making French fries. I meet Chouji tomorrow, so I'm really nervous. Are you at home? Ditch geometry and party.


To: Ino

From: Sakura

Probably because you were banished back there. And no, I'm with Sasuke-kun.


To: Sakura

From: Ino

Banished? Only a little. Should I dress nice for Chouji? Having fun with Sasuke? You jumped him yet?


To: Ino

From: Sakura

Yeah, OKAY. How long've you been there? Exactly--banished. And, uhm... yeah, dress nice. Not TOO nice, though. NO I HAVE NOT JUMPED HIM, YAMANAKA INO! Pervert.


To: Sakura

From: Ino

Thanks. I heard Chouji owns a restaurant, so there will be good food. Why have you not jumped him yet? Are you guys just doing math?


To: Ino

From: Sakura

Oh really, what kind? And yeah, we're just doing that Geometry project.


To: Sakura

From: Ino

Italian, which means I'll be in heaven as I swell up like a balloon. I don't believe you guys are doing math. Some date. Tell Sasuke I say 'Hi.'


To: Ino

From: Sakura

Ino! We aren't on a date, and he said he blames you if we fail our Geometry project. And now he's yelling at me to stop texting you. Bastard.


To: Sakura

From: Ino

Grouch. Tell him you're talking to Ino—NOT KIBA, and that he needs to stop being a monopolizing jealous dork.


To: Ino

From: Sakura

He started yelling that he's not jealous, he has no REASON to be jealous and that I should stop texting because you're dividing my attention from what's important.


To: Sakura

From: Ino

Damn he's jealous. (Things that are important…? Like HIM maybe?) Did he feed you yet? Demand food if not. His neighbor is a very good cook.


To: Ino

From: Sakura

No, he meant the Geometry project. And I'm eating her turkey as we speak-- it's so good!


To: Sakura

From: Ino

FINE, just stomp the romance from life. Pretend to choke on your meat and see if he gives you CPR. Oh, and PH is ditching The Bitch to introduce me to Chouji. Muahahaha.


To: Ino

From: Sakura

What are you, crazy?! You must be desperate. Haha, Temari-Bitch. Haha.


To: Sakura

From: Ino

Just do it. Ten bucks says he has a heart attack and has no idea what to do. My victory over Temari would be more satisfying if she wasn't having a fashion show tomorrow.


To: Ino

From: Sakura

I am NOT choking and dying for your sick satisfaction. And I'm praying that Temari trips and falls. Hey, that sounds like a good idea...


To: Sakura

From: Ino

Fine, killjoy. Can you just make out with him then? (I am praying she trips too. Maybe I should rig her shoes…)


From: GreenEyed07

To: Angel4awhile

Subject: Houston, we have a problem...

Sorry that I just stopped texting you abruptly, but see that subject thing? Majorly true.

So, Sasuke-kun and I were doing the Geometry project, and we were having a little bit of trouble. I said that maybe I should just call you or text you or something, but you know Sasuke-kun and his pride, and he refused. Then I ever-so-innocently said that Kiba was good at this stuff, so maybe I should give him a call, and Sasuke-kun SNAPPED. He started yelling about how ever since I've been seeing Kiba he's all I ever talk about and he's been driving away my attention from my school work and so how am I supposed to get to college if all I ever think about is some stupid boy?

Well, I was pretty mad too. So I told him that he was an idiot and that I don't know WHY he hates me dating Kiba so much but that he better get over it because I don't even want to talk to him if he's going to be mean to me, just like he always is, and then I stormed out of the house.

So now Sasuke-kun and I are fighting again, and that damned Geometry thing STILL isn't finished.

I'm really in a pickle, aren't I, Ino-pig?

--Sakura


From: Angel4awhile

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: Well, you could always land the damn rocket ship.

That ding-bat. Good for you on the dramatic exit—I hoped you remembered to stomp and slam the door. But he really has no right to tell you that stuff—meaning I will be having words with him.

He is so obviously jealous. You're starting to irritate me with your blind little denial issues, by the way. If you people would just shut up and make out already, none of this would happen.

Then again, I love drama. Soap operas especially, (do not laugh at me, I know you watch cartoons on Saturday mornings) so maybe these love spats of yours are a good thing.

I just thought of something—you do realize that your guys' way of flirting is fighting, right? Wow, that's kind of kinky.

You have two days to get that project done Sakura. Two days. Either you patch things up with Sasuke, or get someone to help you finish the entire thing by yourself. In any case, I would talk to Kiba. He is pretty good at math, and you really should figure out where you guys are on the whole dating thing.

I'd say you're more in a pumpkin, Cinderella.

Now then, news about me:

-I have a sort of date tomorrow with Shika so I can meet Chouji. It is very important that I get along with him, since it will be very awkward between PH and I if I don't.

-Mr. Butters has run away from home. I am sick with worry, and have already started designing his tomb stone. This is not only bad because I love Mr. Butters and do not want anything to happen to him, but I am very unattractive when I cry, and I need all the help I can get in the beauty department, seeing as I live with Temari.

-Someone tried to rob McDonalds yesterday—though it wasn't on my shift, thank God. We apparently lost a lot of money, and now The Burger King is flipping out.

That's all,

--Ino


From: GreenEyed07

To: Angel4awhile

Subject: I thought it was a space shuttle...?

Of course I slammed the door-- after all, I was pretty mad at him. Ooooh, Sasuke-kun's gonna get yelled at!

HE. IS. NOT. JEALOUS! I mean, in order for him to be jealous he'd have to see me as something more than an irritating classmate with whom he's forced to work with on this Geometry project, which is why he doesn't like me dating Kiba; apparently, it takes away my focus from that project.

If fighting was Sasuke-kun's way of flirting, he and Naruto would be fucking each other already.

Oh, EW! EW EW EW EW EW! Groooooss. Excuse me while I go bury my head under the covers and whimper with disgust.

I've already talked to Kiba, and he said that yes, he's helping me and we're just casually dating. It's nothing serious, Ino, and you know that. I don't have time for a real relationship. That's why Sasuke-kun and I wouldn't work out. It's for the best, really.

Alright, off the subject of me.

I'm sure you and Chouji will get along just fine. After all, who WOULDN'T like you? Even Temari's been nice to you on some occasions. (doesn't stop me from hating her, though.)

Oh dear. Have you talked to PH about this? You should make him drive around and go find poor Mr. Butters. I BET YOU THIS IS ALL TEMARI'S DOING, THAT SNEAKY LITTLE BITCH! She's probably sacrificing cats in order to make Shikamaru love her. Voodoo! Or, wait... would that be classified as voodoo?

Hmm... maybe you should dress in your sluttish clothes. A lot of guys will come there if you do, and you'll not only regain money (and thus resulting in a raise, perhaps) but you'll be back in The Burger King's good graces (and that will DEFINATELY earn you a raise.)

--Sakura


From: Angel4awhile

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: Oh shut up.

I forgot that I am no longer voicing my opinions on your and Sasuke's relationship. Sorry. (But it's just so FUN to meddle with! Watch me pout…)

Naruto and Sasuke…?

I don't really want to know how your mind works you twisted—

Oh. Heeeeey, that's kind of hot. Oh wow, I must be really horny. Now I'm kind of disgusted with myself. Ack. Must find semi-naked picture of PH and ogle for a while…

Well, um, this is awkward. Shika apparently know that I have that picture of him with out his shirt, since he wrote me a little note on the back. 'Ino, do not stalk me so obviously. Flattering as it is, Temari would kick my ass if she found out and that would be a bother.'

Well, sorry.

(YOU AND SASUKE-KUN NOT GETTING TOGETHER IS FOR THE BEST?! ARE YOU HIGH?! Shutting up now. How dare you make me break my personal vow.)

Moving on to the Ino matters!

Um, several people dislike me. I'm pretty sure Sasuke doesn't like me, as well as Temari and…

I DON'T THINK SHIKA LIKES ME!!

It's true! I mean, I know I can be kind of…enthusiastic…but he calls me troublesome a lot. And Temari keeps on saying that he likes reserved girls—which, hello, I am not.

But—well, hopefully I get along with Chouji.

AND I STILL HAVE NOT FOUND MR.BUTTERS! I haven't told Shika yet since it's his cat, and I think he secretly likes it. I searched Temari's room in case she had incriminating evidence of her burning said cat or whatever—but no such luck. I do a little prayer for him every hour.

I would put back on my sluttish clothes…but I kind of like wearing jeans and sweatshirts now. I don't have to suck in my stomach all the time, or make sure my legs are perfectly tanned or—yeah. They're kind of comfy. I might give into the boss' demands for meeting the month's quota and put them back on though, if I REALLY have too.

See you later,

--Ino


From: GreenEyed07

To: Angel4awhile

Subject: NEVER!!

NO! NO THAT IS NOT KINKY, IT IS JUST SICK AND WRONG AND... Okay, well, maybe a little hot, BUT THAT'S STILL GROSS! (Okay, not really, but still.)

Hmmm, that must've meant he was in your room! Aha! Probably watching you sleep, or something, because he is secretly romantic and harboring feelings for you. (Okay, sorry, that was the Romeo and Juliet-ish coming out of me, which is what we're working on in Drama. Sasuke-kun, obviously, got Romeo. And some dip-shit put me in for Juliet, so now I am. Greeeeat.)

And what the hell? Did we agree on you not talking about mine and Sasuke-kun's (non) relationship? I don't...remember that...

OH NO! I'M LOOSING MY MIND! Oh, wait, I lost that a long time ago. WELL I LOST MY MEMORY! DAMN!

Of COURSE PH likes you! I mean, he's letting you stay at his house and stuff, right? And he wouldn't be taking you to go meet Chouji if he didn't! And since when do you listen to Temari? Never.

I think that if you told PH, it would just help matters, and you guys would be able to find him.

I do believe getting a raise falls under Unless-I-Really-Have-To, yes?

--Sakura


From: Angel4awhile

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: Don't make me bring up our second grade play and your 'moment' with Neji

I KNEW IT! I KNEW YOU WERE A CLOSET PERVERT! (Sasuke and Naruto, eh? Interesting…)

I confront Shika about the whole you-must-have-been-in-my-room-for-you-to-have-seen-this-picture-now-admit-it-you're-in-love-with-me! Unfortunately, it appears that I left said picture lying on the floor, and he was only in my room so he could get Mr. Butters.

I appears that he has noticed Mr. Butters's absence. This does not bode well…

You're in Romeo and Juliet?! But—wait, have you ever been in a play before? I guess you'd be good at it. I mean, you can memorize like no one else, and you have a certain flair—but dude. Sasuke and you as Romeo and Juliet.

Congratulations. The universe hates you. And you lost your mind/memory.

I meet Chouji in…three hours. Mr. Butters has not been found, PH is thankfully oblivious to my impending breakdown, my boss is actually PRESSURING ME to dress like a slut again, (seriously, why is everyone so against Ino-the-nice-girl?!) and Temari hinted that Shika likes independent women who can support themselves.

It's not MY fault my job is crap. Jeez. And I can TOO support myself—I just, um, like living here. Mr. Butters and all.

Instead of flipping the burgers I did my hair for my sort-of-date. It looks very pretty, I think. The Burger King just offered me a raise. I can not believe this. I feel kind of like a prostitute.

Do you think I should take it? I've dressed up before, it's not like it'll hurt anyone. And I'd be making $9.50 an hour instead of $7. It kind of means that I'd be submitting and compromising my tender, newly developed morals though.

But I really need the money.

Tell me how you do on the play, alright? When's the premier? I want to see it. I'll save up some money and come home to cheer you on.

Later,

--Ino


From: GreenEyed07

To: Angel4awhile

Subject: YOU PROMISED YOU WOULD NEVER TALK ABOUT THAT!

Hey, YOU were the one who said it'd be kinky!

THAT WAS JUST HIM MAKING AN EXCUSE! Because you may be blond, but you're not stupid. I'm pretty sure you wouldn't leave such a picture lying around where TEMARI could find it.

And of course I've been in a play before; you just said it above, genius. The Play-With-Neji-That-Shall-Never-Be-Mentioned-Again.

But you ARE an independent and you DO (kind of) support yourself. I mean, you've got a job and stuff. Granted, it's at MCDONALDS, but at least it's SOMETHING, right?

I do think you should take it. I mean, it's only for a little while, right? Besides, (I cannot BELIEVE I'm saying this) it's what's on the inside that counts.

Uhm, it's May 14th. Which gives you a month to raise enough money. Maybe I'll sucker Naruto into driving up and coming to get you. Or maybe Kiba, cause he'd do it.

--Sakura


From: Angel4awhile

To: GreenEyed07

Subject: TOO LATE! BWAHAHAHAHA!

Er, I might've left said picture lying around. Or Mr. Butters might have moved it around, he likes to pick up my stuff and transport it sometimes. Like my underwear—yes, that was embarrassing.

And I know you've been in a play before, but not a PLAY play. Like, the last time was required and it was second grade. (And there was the Neji incident. How scandalous Sakura, how COULD you have accidentally pantsed a third grader ON STAGE?!)

Alright, I'll do it. It's just for a little while, and everyone who I care about already knows me. And if someone tries anything, I think Gaara and Kankuro will save my butt before things get TOO bad.

Woo-hoo! Extra money, here I come…(SEE?! I SUPPORT MYSELF!)

Okay, I'm coming. I'll have enough money by then to see you tragically die onstage and—OH MY GOD, IS THERE KISSING IN THIS PLAY?!

--Ino


From: GreenEyed07

To: Angel4awhile

Subject: ...bitch.

Whaaat?! You never told me about The Underwear Incident. Tell me when you come in May, because I am SO gonna get you back for all those times you've told MY embarrassing secrets. Muahaha!

...oh, wait, you weren't supposed to know about my dastardly plan. Dammit!

It wasn't "accidentally", I did so on purpose. HE MADE FUN OF MY HAIR, THEREFORE HE HAD TO BE PUNISHED!

Exactly. Besides, you could probably save your own butt, never mind Kankuro and Gaara doing so.

See, Temari-bitch, my best friend CAN support herself! Screw you, she IS an (semi) independent woman!

Uhm, yeah, Romeo kisses Juliet at the end...

...Oh. Shit.

--Sakura


From: GreenEyed07

To: ShikamanXX

Subject: Listen...

Since Ino obviously doesn't want to tell you, I will, because she's on the edge of a nervous break down and if that happens, I WILL pull out your intestines through your eyeball sockets, got it buddy?

Mr. Butters has gone missing. Ino is quite attatched to Mr. Butters, and is now freaking out about it. So therefore, after you guys go meet Chouji, LOOK. FOR. MR. BUTTERS.

Oh, and in order to keep her raise and perhaps get more, Ino's gonna have to dress, ah, provocatively again. If you make ONE COMMENT about it... well, think of your poor intestines. Or I could do something else-- I'm a horror movie fanatic. I've watched every variation on how to kill someone. Remember that.

Have fun with Chouji!

--Sakura


From: GreenEyed07

To: Angel4awhile

Subject: Oh shit

Ino, I am in DEEP. DEEP DEEP DEEP DEEP DEEP! DEEPER THAN THE FREAKING OCEAN!

Okay, must calm down. Must think. Must not freak out.

Alright, well, remember how I told you that we were practicing for Romeo and Juliet? Well, Sasuke-kun and I are still angry with each other, so apparently I must've "on purpose" stepped on his foot during one of the scenes, but I didn't, so we started yelling at each other. And this is how it went.

Sasuke: "Goddammit, Sakura, you're so fucking annoying!"

Me: "Oh yeah?! Well how am I annoying, you asshole?!"

Sasuke: "Because now we have less time to work on the Geometry project and because all you ever think and talk about is your precious little Kiba. If I knew that you would be stupid and date him then I would've stopped it earlier!"

Me: "Well the only reason I'm dating Kiba is to forget about the fact that I'm in love with you!"

And then... total silence. He didn't say he loved me back... he didn't even say anything. So I fled there, and urgh, now I'm crying all over Naruto's laptop.

I came to his house because I didn't wanna go home and have the kids all over me and worried, and I can't face Kiba, so I came here. And Naruto-- sweet, sweet Naruto-- was just about to eat some ramen. But guess what he did? He gave it to me instead. I love that boy.

I don't know what to do, Ino-chan, and I REALLY wish you were here right now.

--Sakura

Missa's note to the readers (because she is cool like that and yes, Ren, you can do this too for my A/N for the next chapter): Alright, the updates might come a little slower, and we're sorry, you guys. Really, we are, but it's summer vacation. VACATION. So yeah, please don't skin us alive if you only get updates every three weeks to a month.