Arnold stepped into Claires office shutting the door behind him. She was sitting at her desk with her heels kicked off and her feet resting on her desk, a glass in one hand. He fell heavily into the chair on the other side of her desk. She raised an eyebrow but didn't comment, instead she sat up and poured him a glass of brandy to go with hers.

"You don't have anything stronger?" He asked taking the glass.

"Sorry, this is the best I can do." She said.

"Come on, I know you're a whiskey drinker." Arnold said.

"Yeah, but Jack bought me this junk for Christmas. I have to get rid of it somehow." She said .

"Jack got it for you? expensive gift." Arnold said taking a drink.

She let her head fall back and closed her eyes. She took a drink of her own swallowing slowly with a soft shrug. It wasn't often that they drank in the workplace, but when one of them had a particularly hard day they would meet for drinks in her office. For a few minutes when all the patients were in bed they allowed themselves to relax.

"How's Helga?" Claire asked.

"Struggling." Arnold said with a sigh.

"What was she like? As a kid?" She asked without lifting her head.

"Headstrong, stubborn, opinionated, tough as nails but a real lady underneath. There was a soft side to her, sweet, innocent, kind...she's a lot like she is now, but different." He said.

"You liked her didn't you?" She asked.

"Yeah, I did." He took another drink.

"We're quite the pair Arnold, you wearing yourself out to save a girl you knew fifteen years ago, and me desperately in love with a man who only cares about my career." She said.

"Why don't you date Claire?" Arnold asked.

"Why don't you?" She shot back.

"I'm serious. You come back here day after day, and you work hard, you're good at it. I just think that any man like Jack would have to see how wonderful you are." He said.

"Thanks, in another life maybe he would notice, but not this one. He's a determined man, he's going to be someone, he's going to go somewhere." She said.

"He should take you with him. He'd be nothing without you." Arnold said.

"Maybe, it doesn't matter I don't want to be his step up." She said.

She let her feet drop from her desk to the floor and refilled her drink. She offered him the bottle and he shook his head. She dug in her desk drawer for a minute before pulling out a cigarette. She stood and walked softly to the window opening it a crack she leaned against the frame. Cigarette in one hand and her drink in the other, the moonlight spilling in from the window cast the room in cool blue tones, and her eyes looked more vibrant, her hair more golden and her skin more porcelin. He imagined back in the day she was breathtakingly beautiful. She was still a looker and her body would make most younger women jealous, but the only man she wanted to notice didn't.

"When did you start smoking again?" Arnold asked.

"Everytime Jack visits, I have one...just one." She said taking a drag.

"You have any extra?" He asked.

"Top left drawer." She said taking a drink.

He moved around her desk and pulled out the pack. He lit one before taking a deep drag. The smoke burned his lungs and the alcohol burned his throat, he liked the burn. He moved towards the window to stand beside Claire. She was a nice person, she could be strict when she had to be, and professional for sure, but a nice person. She was a lot like Helga, there was a side of her that nobody ever saw.

She was warm, loving, and giving. She gave everything she had to Jack and the man barely noticed or pretended not to. She was standing on an island that was sinking fast, the water was rising and instead of swimming to safety she was standing there letting it rise. She knew it too, she knew the choices she had made brought her here and she accepted them. She didn't cry about Jack or mention it at all unless Arnold brought it up, but he knew that deep down she was drowning.

As much as he looked up to her she was everything he didn't want to be. She was single and pining over someone unattainable. She held a high position of respect, but most patients resented her. She was strong because she didn't have anyone she could be broken around.

"How do you think it's going with Irene?" Claire asked.

"Okay, she's coming out of her shell, but Leon...He's struggling." Arnold admitted.

"It really wasn't fair to dump this on him, but he's the best guy for it." Claire said.

"He's doing a great job, I'm just worried about when her husband wants her back." Arnold said.

"We'll cross that bridge when we get there." Claire said taking a drink.

"I'm going to head home it's getting late." Arnold said.

"Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow." She said taking a drag on her cigarette.

Arnold put his cigarette out in the ash tray on her desk. He set his glass down beside it and started for the door. He turned to look back at her one more time and paused.

"You deserve to be loved Claire, you deserve a man in your life." Arnold said.

"Oh Arnold, I've had men in my life...lots of men...I loved some of them, I hated some of them, but I didn't need any of them...until Jack..." She said with a bitter laugh.

"I don't know what you mean." He said confused.

"I know you don't. Someday I'll tell you, if I tell you now you'll run screaming from this room." She said.

"I'm sure you can't tell me anything I haven't heard from a patient." Arnold said.

"You'd be surprised." She said taking another slow drink.

"Come on, what is it with this guy?" He pressed, needing to know.

"I was a whore Arnold. In the literal meaning, I had sex for money. Any guy, any time, anywhere. One night a John beat me up pretty bad and he tossed me out on the steps of a hospital...Jack was the attending nurse that night. He saved my life...I promised him I'd go straight and he helped me find a loan to go back to school...He helped me become a respected psychiatrist." She said.

"Claire..."He didn't know what he was going to say but she interrupted.

"Spare me your pity Arnold, God knows I've had enough of that. Just go home and get some rest." She said finally looking at him.

"You're a talented doctor, he may have helped you start...but you did the rest. Your secret is safe with me." He promised.

"Thank you, Goodnight Arnold." She said turning back to the window.

"Goodnight Claire." He exited the room and finally understood a lot more about who Claire really was.

Arnold pushed through the doors the next morning and headed down the hall. Claire was standing talking to Jack about a file and Arnold walked over to her. He handed her the cup of coffee in his left hand and she smiled.

"One salted caramel coffee." Arnold said.

"Thanks, Jack this is Arnold." She said motioning towards Arnold.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Arnold, Claire has told me so much about you." Jack said.

Arnold smiled and shook the older mans hand. Claire smiled and took a drink of her coffee, Arnold supplied the coffee every friday for as long as they had worked together.

"Jack was telling me about a new drug plan." Claire said.

"Really?" Arnold asked and she nodded.

"Yes, this new drug has worked wonders in some other institutions. As far as patient control it's had great success." Jack said handing Arnold the file.

Arnold let his eyes scan the file briefly then looked at Claire.

"You're kidding right? Drugs this massive at that dose?" Arnold asked.

"Well, it's a control subsantce." Jack said.

"I understand, but half these people won't be able to function on meds that high." Arnold said looking at Claire.

"Claire said the same thing, but I think it's worth a try." Jack said with a smile.

"These people need help not medicated. A plan like this is barbaric, what's next electric shock?" Arnold asked.

"Well, it's just an idea for now." Jack said taking the file.

Jack turned to Claire and Arnold fell silent to watch the interaction.

"I really think we should discuss this later." He said to her.

"Jack, I don't know." She said.

"Come one Claire, where's my back up girl?" Jack asked with a winning smile.

"I'm here." She said with a sigh.

"Look, how about dinner? My place tomorrow night?" Jack asked.

"I...I don't know." She said biting her lip.

"Come on, I won't make a decision without your input." He promised.

"Alright, dinner it is." She said.

"There's my girl." Jack said with a bigger smile. He leaned over and kissed her cheek before turning to Arnold.

"Arnold, it was nice to meet you." Jack said.

"Yeah, you too." Arnold lied shaking his hand again.

As soon as Jack was gone Claire started to walk down the hall and Arnold fell instep beside her.

"Claire, you're not buying into this are you?" He asked.

"I don't know." She admitted.

"A dosage that high? It could kill some of these people." Arnold said.

"Nobody is dying here, not on my watch." She said.

"Okay, so back me up here. Half these people would be completely mindless." Arnold said.

"We're filling up, there's more patients than nurses, we need some kind of control." She said.

"Not like this." Arnold said.

"Look, I just told him I'd think about it. I'm not agreeing to it." She said.

"He's using you, Claire...dinner? Come on." Arnold said brushing past a patient.

They reached her office and she paused at the door. She held her coffee in one hand and dug in her pocket with the other for her key.

"He's not using me. He's trying to help these people." She said.

"Claire, you're not this stupid." Arnold said.

"Calm down, just...let me think okay?" She said.

"Don't be a sell out, you're a talented doctor don't let his fancy dinners and pet names turn you into another drug pusher." Arnold said.

"I just need to think about it."She said.

"Think about it then, but I'm against it." Arnold said.

"Yeah I get that." She snapped.

"Good, I have patients to help...you remember what that was like don't you?" Arnold asked brushing past her he walked to his own office.

Leon stepped into the main hall and immediately saw Irene. She was sitting in a small green chair in the corner. Her knees were drawn up infront of her and she was chewing on her thumbnail. Her eyes were staring out the window at something. He took a deep breath before moving towards her.

"How are you feeling today?" He asked as he approached.

"Well, I haven't tried to kill myself yet...but it's still early." She said with a shrug.

"Miss Irene..."He felt suddenly sick.

"I'm kidding." She said finally looking at him with a smile. A genuine smile.

"You ought not do that to me Miss Irene." He said with a sigh of relief.

"Sorry, I suppose it was bad taste." She said with a laugh.

When she laughed her hair fell forward and she pushed it back with one hand. He smiled back at her. She was pretty, deep brown soulful eyes, and black satin hair, her porcelin skin looked almost luminous in the sunlight, but when she smiled at him he saw her as a real human. Not an abused wife, or a suicidal young woman but a real lady.

"I suppose I just need to get used to your sense of humor." He said.

"I wasn't aware I even still had one." She siad honestly.

"You seem to be doing better." He commented.

"I am, I forgot what it was like to be me. The real me, not the one Steve owned." She said.

Behind him one of the patients turned on the television. They switched to some channel playing music, but he didn't turn around.

"What were you like before?" He asked.

"I laughed a lot, I liked to tell stories...I used to dance." She said with a sigh of pure contentment.

"When was the last time you danced?" He asked.

"Oh, I don't know six, seven years." She said.

"Then...you're over due." He said offering her his hand.

She looked up at him for a second before smiling up at him, this time she smiled wide enough it even reached her eyes. She laughed a little before taking his hand and he pulled her gently to her feet. He spun her away from him and she laughed before he pulled her closer.

"I should warn you, I haven't done this in forever." She said resting one hand on his shoulder.

"I was always told I had two left feet." He said placing his hand on her waist.

It was now that he realized how tiny she was compared to him. Her tiny hand disappeared inside his, and she didn't even reach his shoulders in height. Her waist was small enough his hand could easily span it, and he was more than a few inches wider than she was. She tightened her hand on his shoulder a little, the pressure so light he barely noticed. He spun her away from him again before pulling her back in and he resisted the urge to tug her body against his. More than twice she tripped over his feet, but she didn't seem to mind.

"Lead with your left foot." She said. She looked down at the their feet and he tried to follow her instructions.

"No, your left...your left." She said with a laugh.

When she laughed he couldn't help but smile, and after a few minutes she gave up on trying to teach him the proper steps. He spun her a few times in a circle and managed to dip her down without dropping her.

"You should do that more often." She said when he pulled her back up.

"What? dip women?" He asked.

"No, smile. You're always so serious." She said softly.

a slower song came on the television, and her fingers on her left hand slid a little further up his shoulder to his neck. He slowed down considerably in his dancing until they were just moving in a small circle. Something was different in the entire mood. He felt it in his chest, and he could see it in her brown eyes. The teasing was gone and finally after a few minutes he looked away. He couldn't look into her eyes for another second. She didn't say anything as they stayed their dancing slowly, hesitantly she moved to lay her head on his chest.

He felt the weight of her tiny head on his chest, the slight heat from her body, her small hands on his shoulder and in his hand. Her hair fell long enough that it brushed his arm. He closed his eyes and let himself just feel her.

Arnold sat behind his massive oak desk still trying to calm down after meeting Jack. He had only seen Jack at a few parties, and once in awhile in the hall way. He may have just met the man but he already disliked him. Helga was sitting in the chair on the other side of his desk, this was supposed to be a therapy session but so far she hadn't said a word. He took a deep breath pushing his thougths on Jack aside for now.

"Helga, you have to talk to me." He said.

"You seem stressed today." She pointed out.

"Yeah, I am a little." He said leaning back in his chair.

"Trouble with your girlfriend?" She asked.

"Yeah, I don't have one that's the trouble." He said with a smile.

"I'm sure you could find one, there's no shortage of female nurses here." She said.

"I don't date people I work with." He said.

She didn't say anything but he could tell she wanted to. Helga never could resist making a snide comment on his love life.

"What? you may as well say whatever you're thinking." He said.

"I thought maybe you and that doctor were..."She didn't finish.

"Claire? No, she's just a friend." He said.

"How much longer do I have to be in here?" She asked.

"That depends on you, you have to talk to me." He said.

"There's nothing to talk about." She said. She stood up and angrily paced to look out the window.

"You were kidnapped, held hostage for fifteen years. How is that nothing?" He asked.

"You should have all just moved on and left well enough alone." She said.

"Moved on? You can't be serious." He said.

"Why? My life is over...Hell, I didn't have a life." She said with a shrug.

"Helga..."He was about to speak she interrupted him.

"Don't start with your psycho bull Arnold, I'm not some experiment. I'm a human being, and I had my entire life wiped away, there's no cure and nothing you can do to fix that." She said.

"So you're upset that you missed some things?" He asked.

"Upset? No I'm pissed off and I didn't miss some things. I missed everything." She said.

"Like what?" He asked.

"I never got my license, I never graduated high school, I didn't start college. My math and science skill are on an fourteen year olds level. The only reason my reading isn't is because I was always a head in that." She said.

"Helga, that stuff isn't that important. You can still do all that." He said.

"That's just the start, I've never been on a first date. I didn't get to go to prom, did you? Who did you take Arnold? Lila? I didn't get to go at all. I didn't get to go out drinking when I turned twenty one. I didn't get to fall in love, I've never been kissed, I've never had sex..."She broke off and bit her lip fighting back tears.

"I didn't go." He said softly.

"What?" She asked.

"To prom...I didn't go...I was going to, but then I got to thinking about you, and how everyone had just moved on. I didn't go." He said with a shrug.

"Yeah? but you've date haven't you?" She asked.

"Yeah, a little." He admitted.

"So don't pretend to understand because you don't." She said.

She started for the door but she had to pass his desk to get there. He jumped to his feet and grabbed her arm. She tried to shrug loose but he tightened his grip refusing to back down this time.

"Don't run from me." He said.

"You don't understand. Life went normal for you, I don't even know any of the television shows that are on anymore. I don't know who the knew singers are, I don't know how to use a cell phone. The stuff that came into the world in the past fifteen years was an everyday thing for you, you've taken it for granted...I missed it all and I don't understand anything." She said.

"I missed you! You think I don't know what it's like to not live for fifteen years?! I spent my life wondering where you were, if you were dead or alive!" He said.

It was a rule Claire had taught him early to never yell at a patient, and under normal circumstances he never would but she was anything but normal and so was the situation.

"Why would you miss me?" She asked slowly turning to face him.

"You were my friend." He said.

"I missed you too...everyday." She said she took a deep breath and finally started to cry.

He moved taking her into his arms. He held her close and she began to sob. Her arms wrapped around his waist and she buried her face against his chest.

"Helga, I know this is hard...but it's going to be okay." He said gently.

"I just want my life back." She said.

"I know." He said.

"Who's going to ever want me like this? Who's going to want to be with me?" She asked breaking more.

"There's nothing wrong with you." He said.

"I've never been kissed, I've never been with anyone..." She said.

He pulled away from her and she lifted her head. Her hair was a mess the new choppy cut needing a good brush. Her eyes were shining with tears and a few rolled down her red cheeks. She sniffed a little. He moved his hand to cup the side of her face. He swallowed past the lump in his throat and leaned in. She hesitated a minute before closing her eyes.

His lips were less than a second from brushing hers, less than a heartbeat away and more than a lifetime ready. His office door swung open and he jumped away from her his hand dropping. She turned to look at the door.

"I'm sorry I..."The nurse motioned at the hall.

"It's okay, what's wrong?" Arnold asked slipping back into proffesional mode.

"Your patient...Sarah, she's having an episode." The nurse said.

"I'm coming." He said.

The nurse left and he moved to follow her pausing briefly he turned to Helga.

"Stay here." He said before closing the door behind him.

Arnold found Sarah thrashing wildly on the floor while two female nurses tried to hold her down. She screamed and clawed at them and he winced. He motioned to a third nurse.

"Give me something to knock her out." He said over the screams.

The nurse handed him a syringe and he winced before injecting it into Sarahs leg. She screamed but almost instantly her thrashing slowed down. She let out a choked sob and he stroked her hair back.

"It's okay." He said softly.

A male nurse moved forward to lift Sarah gently into his arms and he started down the hall way. Arnold glanced at the nurse on the floor, her arm had deep scratched up her arm. He offered her a hand and pulled her to her feet.

"Go get that looked at." He said motioning at her arm.

"Yes, Doctor." She hurried off and he turned to the other nurse.

"Cut her nails while she's alseep." He said.

"Yes sir." She hurried off as well.

He turned and moved back into his office. Helga was sitting on the couch by the window still looking out. He closed the door, but didn't move any closer. She was still crying her could tell, and for once he wasn't sure what to do.

"Helga..."He started to speak.

"What did I do to my hair?" She asked, half sob.

Despite himself he smiled. He moved to sit beside her on the couch he took in her appearance.

"It's not that bad." He said.

"Yeah, sure." She said wiping her eyes.

"It's not, I kind of like it." He said.

"Can I ask you a question?" She asked finally turning to face him.

"Of course." He said.

"Do you think I have a chance? really?" She asked.

"Of course you do. You'll learn to drive, and you'll meet someone. He's going to love you."He said honestly.

"Thanks Arnold." She sighed.

"Why'd you get in the car?" He asked.

"I knew him...I'd met him a few times, he knew my dad."She said softly.

"Helga, do you know why he did it?" He asked.

"Yep, and you know what? I can't say I wouldn't do the same thing." She said looking back out the window.

"Why? why did he do it?" Arnold asked.

"I think our time is up for today." She said and a second later the timer on his desk went off.

She stood up and ran a hand through her hair pushing it back from her eyes, a few loose strands fell back into her face, but he decided it didn't look bad on her. She tugged the sleeves of her sweater down over her hands. She turned and walked out of his office and he watched her go. He wasn't sure if he could consider what happened today as progress, but it was something.