Hey readers, Vaati's Apprentice here. This is my first fan fiction. And I would appreciate some feedback, positive or negative. But, I am going to finish this story even if everyone dispises me with every fiber of there living soul. Anyway, I do not own the Legend of Zelda or Halo. If I did, I would be a much happier boy.
CHAPTER 1: THE PILLAR OF AUTUMN
Our story begins in Hyrule Field, where we find the Hero of Time on his horse, Epona, galloping as fast as... I don't know, something that's fast. Anyway, why was Link in such a hurry you ask? What, you don't ask? Well, I'll tell you anyway. Link had received an urgent letter from Princess Zelda. It didn't say much, just that he needed to meet her in the Temple of Time as soon as possible.
Soon, Link found himself outside Castle Town. Where he had to dismount Epona since she couldn't cross bridges due to some sort of strange bridge phobia. Link worked his way through the crowds of people who apparently had nothing better to do but wander around aimlessly, until he reached the temple. Link pushed open the doors to find... nothing, it was pitch black inside. But, he knew that the princess may need his help, so he stepped inside. When he did, the doors slammed shut behind him (OMG!!!). Then the room became bathed in soft pink light, giving him his sight back. And the sight in front of him made him jump out of his skin. The floor was covered in rose petals, and there was an enormous bed in the center of the temple. And lying on it was Zelda, wearing an outfit wich I will not describe in detaile for fear of raising the rating.
"Why hello Link," Zelda said in a very seductive tone. "Y-You wanted to see me princess," Link stammered nervously. Showing that he had apparently never been in this kind of situation. Zelda let out an amused giggle, "Link, you're so nervouse that you forgot that you were the one who wrote to me. But don't worry, I promise to take good care of you." "What, I wrote you a letter?" Link asked, clearly confused. "Well of course you did, I kept it." Zelda then produced a small envelope from the folds of the bed, opened it, and read it out-loud.
Dearest Zelda,
There is something that I must tell you. Ever since we first met my mind has never been withought thoughts of you. Every time I felt that I could not move on, I thought of you're face. And it was as if I had been reborn. I do not know if you feel the same way about me, but I cannot live withought telling you this. Zelda, I love you. I always have and always will.
Love,
Link
P.S. If you feel the same way, then be at the Temple of Time at 10:00. Where I will (insert M rated content here) until you beg me to stop.
Before Link had time to think about who actually wrote that letter, Zelda had him in a chokehold-like hug. "Link, I've never heard words of such beauty. And I want you to know that I feel the exact same way." With that, Zelda grabbed Link's face and pulled him into a passionate kiss. However, as bad luck would have it, the doors of the temple swung open. And in came Tetra. "Link, I got you're letter and I... WHAT THE (BLEEP) ARE YOU DOING TO MY LINK?!!!" Zelda only tightened her already unbelievebly tight grip on Link's neck. "Get you're own, this one's mine," Zelda hissed defensively. "Uuum.. is this a bad time?" Everyone turned to the door to see that Ashei and Auru had arrived.
"Great, thanks for ruining the mood." Zelda said. Then stomped off angrily to change into her dress. "Let me guess, you guys got letters from someone claiming to be me, right?" Link asked. Everyone nodded. Link wondered what Auru's letter said. But decided that the less he knew, the better. "Hey everyone, where's the party," everyone turned to the door once againe, and saw that Mikau was the next to arrive. "Mikau, I thaught you were dead," Link said. "I'm just as confused as you are." Mikau said. Link opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off once again by a pair of arms wraped tightly around his throught and a barrage of "Hey! Listen! Watch Out!"
Needless to say, the annoying shouting was coming from Navi. But the one hugging him was Malon. "Link, I knew you had feelings about..." before she could finish, Tetra and Ashei had her on the ground, and were enganged in a three-way chick fight. At this pount Zelda had returned, wearing her normal dress. And she was getting very ticked off at the number of people that had come to ruine her and Link's good time. Zelda decided to vent her rage by joining in on the fight. Then, for the second time today, the doors slammed shut (OMG...AGAIN!!!). Except this time, there was meniacle (I probably didn't spell that right) laughter filling the air.
The dueling hotties stopped their fighting to look in the direction of the mellow-dramatik laughter. Standing in front of the Door of Time was a young boy, only a few years younger than Link. He had purple skin, and dressed just like Vaati, except for the fact that he wore a purple booney hat and glasses with yellow frames. And he had short hair, unlike Vaati who had enough hair to stuff a king sized pillow with.
"Are you Vaati's brother?" Link asked a little confusedly. "Unfortunately no, I am his apprentice. And for reasons that I am too lazy to discuss, you must simply call me Vaati's Apprentice.""How about we just call you V.A.?" said Auru. "Whatever, it doesn't matter since you're all about to die." A loud "WHAT" proceeded V.A.'s sentence. "Let me explaine." he said while trying to get the feeling back in his ears. "You see, I've discovered that by sacrificing the soul of a mighty warrior, I would be able to revive my master. Unfortunately, I couldn't find a mighty warrior. So I have to settle for the alternative." "What's the alternative?" Asked Ashei. "A bunch of pussys." replied V.A. Ignoring the fact that he had just been called, Mikau raised his hand. "Yes, the Zora in the front." V.A. said pointing at Mikau. "So, you revived me just so you could kill me?" Mikau asked. After taking some time to think, V.A. replied "Yup, pretty much. Speaking of killing..." V.A. shot a bolt of lightning magic at the Door of Time. Wich slowely opened, revieling a large swirling vortex. "Alright, get in." V.A. said pointing at the vortex. "You don't really expect us to just go in there do you?" Link asked.
"Of course I do" V.A. replied, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "And what if we don't?" asked Zelda. "Then you shall feel the wrath of my latest creation." With that, Vaati's Apprentice pulled out... A CUPCAKE (AAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!). "Ooh, yummy." Malon said, rushing towards the menacing baked good. Just as she was about to grab it, the cupcake bit her finger. "Ow, bad cupcake!" Malon said, scolding the cupcake. "Fool, It's tasted human blood!" The cupcake began snarling, then it lunged towards the group with it's jaws wide open. "Quik, everyone into the vortex!" V.A. yelled over the screaming. Everyone ran into the vortex while Link fended off the demented pastry. He abandoned his battered sword and sheild and ran into the vortex. Door of Time closed after Link entered, preventing the cupcake from chasing them.
Meanwhile, the group found themselves in a metal hallway with blaring sirens and flashing lights. They could all see that there was some sort of battle going on between short-eared humans and weird blue skinned creatures. "Let's get out of here." Zelda yelled, pointing at an open door. Everyone rushed in, and the metal door closed behind them. Before they could think, they were shot foreward. They could now see that they were in a small metal ship that had just been detatched from a much larger ship. "What's that?" Mikau asked, pointing at a very large ring shaped world. "Hell if I know, but we're landing on it." V.A. yelled over the noise. "Brace for impact!" V.A. yelled as the ship hurled towards the ring's surface. Then the ship hit the ground, and everything went black.
END OF CHAPTER 1
Well, there is my first fan fiction. So, what did you think? Good, bad, all right? Please, just give me some feedback. LOZ FOREVER!
