Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy. If I did, I would know Patrick Dempsey. And currently, that's something I can only dream about.
If people don't like this let me know, because I'm not getting many reviews. I won't spend time on it if you guys aren't enjoying it.
Derek hadn't slept all night. He had spent 6 hours tossing and turning. Going over and over in his mind the decision that he had to make. And now the alarm was going off and he had to go to the hospital where his soon to be ex-wife or soon to be ex-girlfriend were both working. Apparently, life hated him.
"Good morning, Meredith, Izzie," Derek said, attempting to be upbeat, as they all walked into the hospital just as the two girls came in.
Izzie just looked at Derek and shook her head before walking to the elevator and leaving Meredith with Derek in the middle of the lobby, exactly where they had been when Addison had showed up.
"Did you make a decision yet?" Meredith asked.
"I told you…I uh…I just need some time"
"Okay. Well until then, this," Meredith said gesturing between the two of them, "You. Me. It's over. Until you decide. Because I'm not going to be that girl. So unless it has something to do with the hospital, don't talk to me, don't look at me. Just don't…until you make a decision."
"Trouble in paradise?" Derek heard from behind.
"Always with the taunting."
"Make a decision yet?" Addison asked, echoing Meredith.
"No," Derek ran his hands through his hair.
"Then clearly I'm not as annoying as you say I am."
"Addison," he said, looking down at his wedding ring.
"I know. You need time."
"Yeah. I'll um, I'll talk to you later" he said, still staring at his wedding ring.
Whether Derek realized it right then or not, he had already made a decision. The ring on his finger. The vows he had taken in church in front of his friends and family. He couldn't just sign that all away on a piece of paper. As he looked down at the ring, he realized he deserved to give Addison a chance. The only problem was making this decision meant hurting Meredith. And the thought of her in pain made him sick to his stomach.
"Stevens and Karev, you're with the new OB, Montgomery-Shepherd, O'Malley, you're with Burke, Yang, pit and Grey, the other Shepherd," Bailey yelled through the locker room as she did everyday.
"Fanfreakingtastic," Meredith muttered, still hung over from the night before.
"Do you have something to say Grey?" Bailey barked.
"No."
"Good. Go save some lives," Bailey ordered.
"I'll switch with her," Cristina almost pleaded.
"I don't do switches. You know that."
"But…" Meredith tried to add.
"Go!" Bailey shouted, started to get angry.
Meredith thought that she had been lucky. She had been able to get away from him the night before but apparently wouldn't be so lucky today. She had a sneaking feeling that Derek had requested Meredith on his services just so that he could get her to talk about the situation at hand.
"Apparently, I'm your intern," Meredith said less than enthusiastically when she found Derek at the nurse's station.
"If it makes you feel any better, I didn't request you."
"Yeah that really helps," Meredith rolled her eyes.
"Look, Meredith. I know this is going to be tough. It's not easy on me either. We just…" Derek tried to say before Meredith cut him off.
"No. There isn't going to be any of that. No McDreaminess. There is no we. Now, where is the patient you want me to see?"
"2215," Derek sighed, following behind her as she walked towards the patients room.
He had no idea how he was going to break his decision to Meredith. There just wasn't an easy way to tell your girlfriend that you were going back to your wife, especially after you had told her the marriage was over.
"He still hasn't made a decision. That could be a good sign right?" Meredith flopped down at the table in the cafeteria.
"I say you dump him and get it over with," Cristina spat.
"She's in love with him, Cristina." Izzie said.
"Just go screw someone else. That'll make him want you back" Alex added.
"I…" Meredith began until her pager went off, "Crap. It's 911 on Derek's patient. I gotta go."
The patient they had been attending to earlier in the day had been doing fine. She had come in after a car accident with a mild concussion and there was some concern of bleeding in the brain so they were keeping her overnight for observation. And now the patient was seizing and needed surgery.
Derek hadn't said one word to her throughout the entire operation. Mrs. Clark had needed an emergency craniotomy and he hadn't said one word to her since they scrubbed in. Usually when he was in surgery with her, they made conversation. He was her teacher. He let her hold a retractor or at least look at what he was doing but today, there was nothing. Mrs. Clark would be okay, barring any complications, but as Meredith went to scrub out, she had a feeling that the same couldn't be said for her relationship.
"You're staying with her" Meredith whispered as she dried her hands.
"She's my wife." Derek said, unable to look at her.
Meredith just nodded and walked out of the scrub room. There were no tears. There was no yelling. No anger. She didn't know she felt. She loved Derek. Loved him. She hadn't felt this way about someone since…well, she couldn't even remember. She had begged him to pick her, choose her, love her. And he picked his wife. He chose his wife who cheated on him over his girlfriend who begged him to be with her. There was only one cure for this weird sort of numbness she felt. Tequila.
Goodbye my almost lover
Goodbye my hopeless dream
I have a love-hate relationship with this. I just really, I don't want to say hate, but don't think my writing is all that good or that I portray the characters well. What do you think? Reviews!!!
