Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's. ShondaRhimes does. And according to the recent spoilers, she hates us. And I don't hate you.

Well I had a major freak out when I read the recent spoilers. I won't say anything because I don't know if you guys have read anything or if you want to know. But I almost burst into tears. That is why I love fanfic land. It's happy. Or it's going to be. Soon.

Meredith Grey lived her life under a banner of avoidance. It was what she was good at. Something bad happened, she didn't talk about. She stayed away from it, or in this case who. They're shifts had been at the same times for the past few days and somehow, she had managed not to get put on his service and had managed to stay away from him altogether. But their sex from the night of Cristina's wedding kept playing in her head like a broken record. She had cheated.

"What's wrong with you Grey?" Alex asked, taking a seat next to her.

"Nothing. I'm fine."

"You say the word fine so much it's starting not to sound like a word. Come on. Tell me," he leaned back in his chair.

Meredith took a deep breath, "I slept with Derek."

"I already knew that. The whole hospital knows that. I thought you were over him and were doing that Gabe guy."

"Dating, not doing. And Derek and I…"

Alex started to laugh, "That's where you two disappeared to at the wedding. Everybody was looking for you. They thought you had some big surprise from the maid of honor and the best man."

"I'm so screwed,"

"So you did McDreamy. He and the She-Shepherd aren't happy anyway. He probably wasn't getting any at home."

"They're having a baby," Meredith admitted.

"Wow. I can cover the rest of your shift if you want. I was off an hour ago."

"Avoidance. I'm so good at it. Thanks Alex," she muttered.

"Don't mention it."

The last thing she needed or wanted was to run into Derek or Addison in the halls. And now, thanks to Alex being unusually nice, she got to leave early and not have to deal with all the stares coming from the nurses and rest of the interns. It was pretty obvious that something had happened. For the previous weeks, Derek and Meredith had been friends. Chatting in the hallway, laughing in the scrub room, and eating lunch together in the cafeteria. But since the wedding, they hadn't spoken once.

Derek's shift finished up uneventful. He had been looking for Meredith all day, but each time she saw him she would disappear around a corner. They had both been avoiding each other for most of the week but Derek's conscious had had enough and he needed to talk to Meredith. And he needed to tell Addison about what happened. He had been so angry at her for cheating on him and now he had done the same thing to her. But it was different. Mark was an affair. Meredith wasn't.

"Addison, we have to talk," he said coming into the trailer.

"Yeah. Yeah we do…"Derek…there's a chance…there's a chance the baby is Mark's," she said before Derek could reveal his infidelity with Meredith.

He was silent. Part of him had forgiven her for cheating with his best friend. And now there was a chance that she was carrying that same man's baby and not his own child. He didn't feel angry. He felt like he had been cheated. Like he had wasted time trying to make things work with Addison. Time that could have been spent with Meredith.

"Please say something Der," she begged.

"You're pregnant with Mark's baby," he said monotonously.

"It could be…but it could be yours. I had a paternity test run yesterday. I'm just waiting for the results."

"That was 2 months ago. It's been 2 months since you and Mark…" he worked out in his head, trying to be hopeful, "And you're only a few weeks along right?"

"Actually, I'm 6 weeks. But you and I…before you caught me with Mark. So it's possible it's yours."

"I have to get out of here,"

"Derek…Don't leave. Don't walk away."

"I can't…I can't look at you. I look at you and I feel nauseas…I just, I can't…I have to go" he shook his head as he slammed the door to the trail.

He had nowhere to go. He couldn't go to the hospital because he had just come from there. He couldn't talk to Burke because he was on his honeymoon. If something like this happened in New York, he would have gone to one of his sisters. The only place he could think to go, and probably the worst place to go, was Meredith's house. They had been avoiding each other since what happened at the wedding and now Addison had dropped the bomb on him about the baby possibly not being his. And suddenly, Meredith's house was the only place he wanted to be.

Meredith spent the night at home, lying on her bed, Doc's head resting on her lap. Izzie and George had invited her to go to Joe's with them but she was too afraid of running into either Derek or Addison. And her phone kept buzzing with phone calls from Gabe that she continued to ignore. The knock on the door startled her out of her thoughts but she was even more surprised when she went downstairs and saw who was on the other side of the glass.

"Hi," Derek breathed, as Doc wagged his tail, happy to see him.

"Hey."

"Can I come in?"

"Yeah," she answered, opening the door the rest of the way.

Derek didn't say a word as he walked into the house and knelt down to pet Doc.

"So…What does this mean?" Meredith asked.

"I don't know," Derek stood up, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I can't…We can't have an affair, Derek."

"I know," he agreed, "So what do we do?"

"I don't know either."

"I guess we have some things to figure out."

"Yeah. I don't think we should see each other until we do."

"Meredith," he protested.

"We can't Derek. We tried being friends and it didn't work. And I just…Being around you…It's too much."

"What about Gabe?" ask

"He doesn't know," she murmured.

"Oh," Derek whispered, "Well, I guess I'll see you at the hospital."

Meredith just nodded as tears welled up in her eyes. She didn't want to give up Derek. It was one of the hardest things she had ever done. But being around him and seeing him with Addison hurt too much. Even if Derek was the only place she felt like she belonged.

And time has changed nothing at all
You're still the only one that feels like home
I've tried cutting the ropes and and I let you go
But you're still the only one
that feels like home

I think this chapter is crap. Important but crap. But, this is where the timing gets messed up. So let's just say Addison is far enough along to be pregnant with either Mark or Derek's baby and all the other time stuff fits in. And…I know I told some of you the Mark thing wasn't happening. But the more I thought about it, the better I liked the idea. And the other idea…well I just thought it was too mean and sad and would never want anybody to go through it. So I changed the plot a little. Leave me some love!!