"So th' witch an' her obese charge spread more rumors about th' beauty locked in th' tower an' th' 'magical herbs' which were really run of th' mill opium an' marijuana. An' they kept trappin', molestin' an' murderin' princes until all th' excess royalty in th' land was killed off an' the peasants became an autonomous collective. After maybe thirty years of happy homicide, they both died when somethin' heavy an' sharp an' medieval fell on their heads. An' everybody who wasn't worm food lived happily ever after. The End."
Jack lay on his bunk, curled into a tight ball. His hands were pressed to his face, but streams of mascara tainted tears leaked out between his fingers. Sharp, wheezing gasps shook his slender frame. After a few minutes, he managed to gasp out a strangled sentence.
"Th-That was the best . . .version of . . . . Ruh . . .Rapunzel . . .I've ever heard."
JB shrugged lightly.
"Storytellin's always been a talent o' mine."
The pair were interrupted by the click of the lock. Jack sat up, swinging his feet to the floor. Johnny Betty sat up, one elbow propped up on her knee.
The door opened and Reverend Dallas came through, followed by two muscle-bound helpers.
"All right, Jack! We've prepared another room for you." The preacher said, forcing another weird smile.
"No, I want to stay with JB. She's cool. And she tells the best bedtime stories."
"I'd rather bunk with Jack than that butch dyke you tried to stick me with last time." Johnny Betty growled. "An' ya'll owe me a hat!"
"You two . . . .you can't be roommates!" Steve cried.
"Why not?" JB and Jack asked in the same voice.
"Because! It would be coed!"
"So?" Jack prompted.
"You two might have sex."
"Ain't that th' whole point of this place?" Johnny Betty asked.
Jack snickered. The two helpers looked amused, but an angry blanche tinted the pastor's face.
"We don't want two minors having sex at Camp Purity! We - we just -"
"Want us to want to have sex with each other?" Jack suggested.
"Well-"
"See, that would work, too, because living in close quarters with a girl would probably open my eyes to the appeal of the fairer sex." Jack looked at the teenage girl sitting on the opposite bunk. "Well, maybe. . . .I guess."
Before the pastor could reply, the albino youth threw himself flat on his mattress to avoid the pillow aimed at his head.
"Like I'd want t' take a roll in th' hay with a string bean like you!" JB howled. "I like my men with a li'l more meat on 'em!"
"'String bean'? Chase says I'm lovely and slender!"
"Johnny Betty, just saying you like men isn't going to convince me that you've been cured." Steve cut in.
If looks could kill, the preacher would have been chopped up and strewn about the room.
"It isn't? What do you have to do to get out of this dump?" Jack asked.
Brother Justin entered the room and hastily whispered a few sentences in the pastor's ear.
"Really? Oh, I see. Jack, you and Johnny Betty can 'hang out' for a bit longer. We'll probably have to move you to a different facility." Reverend Dallas said.
"What? Why?"
"Your parents called. Apparently, there was a threat at your home . . . Likely from your . . .your male lover."
Jack's face lit up like a Christmas tree.
"Chase! Chase is gonna come and get me!" He squealed.
The camp employees glowered at the fair young man and left the room.
"You retrieve him, Phooka. These blessed places give me a migraine." Chase growled, rubbing his temple.
Phooka squinted up at the sign over the gate at Camp Purity. The actual letters were enormous painted wooden things, raised up from the backboard of the sign. Around them were confused jumbles of decorations; carvings and strangely shaped stones and twisted bits of metal. It looked like someone had collages explained to them, but had never actually seen one.
"Won't it hurt Phooka, too?" Matty asked, hanging on his lover's arm.
"Don't worry, annsachd." The fairy said. "Chase has trouble with blessed places because he is inherently evil; he sold his soul to evil forces for power and eternal life. I, on the other hand, am simply a Pagan manifestation of the wide and varied ways to die as a result of water. A Christian protection would not be a problem for me."
The kelpie pressed a kiss to the blond youth's cheek and strode through the gate.
A moment later he was face down in the dirt path, choking and gasping.
"Phooka!" Matty cried, running to his side.
The fairy cried out sharply and changed shape.
The feminine youth whimpered in distress, backing up as a one hundred and eighty pound man morphed into a twelve hundred pound animal.
Phooka struggled to his feet in his horse form and galloped back out of the gate, wheeling around Chase.
"What happened?!" Matty wailed, chasing after him. "You said it wouldn't hurt him!"
Phooka slowed to a halt and lowered his head. To one well-versed in horsemanship, it looked as though he were straining to do something. Nothing happened. Phooka exchanged a startled look with Chase.
"He can't change shape." The warlord said.
"What?! He's a fairy!" Matty wailed, hugging Phooka tightly around the nose. "You said Christian protections wouldn't work on him!"
Chase turned his gaze back to the sign over the gate. As he studied the jumbled mass of detritus nailed around the letters, something jumped out at him.
"Christian protections don't work against him. But Pagan protections do." The ancient warlord pointed to the sign. "Someone nailed an iron horseshoe to the sign. With kelpies having such a strong bond with the equine shape, a horseshoe would have an extremely potent effect on him. He's stuck in that form."
"For - for how long?" Matty asked, blue eyes wide.
"Three days is the general time span."
Phooka snorted in irritation, his tail lashing like a cranky cat's.
"Three days?"
"Wretched, ignorant insects! When I've retrieved my Jack, I'll raze this entire compound to the ground!' Chase snarled. "Migraine or no, I'll -"
The warlord cut off sharply when he realized Matty was stomping through the gate, his whole demeanor radiating anger. The slight youth raised one fist and hammered on the front door.
Chase and Phooka exchanged another look.
"Open up, you narrow-minded asssholes! You broke my boyfriend!" The blonde yelled.
Phooka ducked his head again, this time a decidedly human gesture, and started after his lover. The kelpie hesitated at the gate, then cantered in a quick circle and jumped the fence instead.
Gritting his teeth, Chase followed the pair.
"Come along, Jack. We have another facility in Wisconsin we think you'll like better." Steve said as Brother Justin hauled Jack to his feet and hustled him towards the door.
"No! I don't want to leave! Chase is coming for me! JB! What part of 'bodyguard' did you not understand?!"
Johnny Betty remained stretched out on her bunk.
"Don' throw a hissy fit, Jack." The girl drawled. "It'll be all right."
As the albino youth spluttered protests, the camp employees dragged him out of the safe room and into the hallway.
The dark haired girl sighed quietly as the door was locked again and she was left alone.
JB counted to three hundred.
Then, she got up, carefully stretched, and ripped the door off of it's hinges.
Jack was bound to be outside near a mode of transportation by now. She might as well do her best at her new job.
Reverend Graham Christiansen wasn't what many would consider a bad man. He really tried to listen to the young people under his tutelage and did his absolute best to understand their problems. He disapproved of some of the strong arm tactics used at the camp. He thought that no one could be cured until they decided to be cured. He always told his young charges about his own experiences with homosexuality and how the camp's program had helped him.
He did his utmost to be a good Christian.
Which was why it really wasn't fair that he was the one to open the door to Matthias Conway.
"Oh! Good morning!" Reverend Christiansen said, opening up the main door. "How can I . . .?"
"Who the FUCK said you could put a horseshoe over the gate?!"
Graham rocked back from the force of the exclamation, his eyes going wide. He blinked in shock of the sight of an extremely large horse standing on the porch next to a beautiful Chinese man who was clutching his head in pain.
"I asked you a question, you syphilitic discharge!"
Graham's mouth dropped open in shock and he finally managed to focus on the speaker . . .screamer . . . .the person addressing him.
It opened a little wider as his eyes took in the visage of shining golden hair, beautiful fair skin and elfin blue eyes that blazed like cold fire.
Reverend Christiansen knew right then that his problems with homosexuality weren't over.
The gorgeous youth jabbed a finger back at the front gate.
"Nailing up a lucky horseshoe is a Pagan ritual! This is a Christian camp! If you just pick out any damn tradition you want, that's just sloppy! If there's one thing I hate it's sloppiness!"
Matty stalked forward as he yelled, forcing the minister to back away from him. The older man finally fetched up against a wide couch. Matthias stopped inches from the clergyman's face.
"It's bad enough that you . . . .you hatemongers go around twisting these poor kids' heads by telling them that being gay is evil and twisted, but now you start hurting innocent fairies with your ignorant approach to outdoor design!"
"F-Fairy? Are you gay?" Graham managed to blurt.
Matty's eyes narrowed sharply, taking in the sudden flush on the minister's cheeks and the heat in his hazel eyes.
"Why?" The blond asked in a low voice. "Do you want to fuck me?"
Graham whimpered.
"Matthias! Ask him where Jack is!" Chase ordered.
"Hhhmmmf." Matty growled. "There's an albino kid here; red eyes, red hair, likes eyeliner a bit too much; sound familiar? Tell us where he is."
"I can't do that! You shouldn't even be in here! Well, maybe you should be one of our kids, but-" Graham stammered.
"'One of your kids'? I'm not a kid. I'm nineteen years old. Taking me anywhere against my will constitutes kidnapping."
"You're nineteen?"
"That's right." Matthias's voice took on a warm, rich tone. "I'm legal. We could do anything we wanted together. Would you like that, Preacher Man?"
Graham swallowed heavily.
Matty gave the older man a wicked grin.
"So I don't do the threatening 'beat 'em up' thing very well. How about this: If you don't tell me where Jack Spicer is right now, I'm going to get down on my knees and take your pants off and suck your cock."
The preacher's face turned crimson.
"But I won't let you come in my mouth. I won't let you come at all. No, no, I'll have Chase here tie you up and then I'll suck you until you're right at the edge, right when you can feel it deep down in your prostate and then I'll leave you like that. You won't be able to finish up yourself; you'll just be stuck there with your cock in the air -"
Graham made a choking noise and did something he hadn't done since he was fourteen.
Matty blinked and looked down at the minister's groin.
"Holy sexual frustration, Batman." The blonde tossed a grin over his shoulder at the man and horse standing on the porch. "He just came! Just from me talking to him! I should be a phone sex operator!"
"Jack!" Chase snarled pointedly.
"Oh yeah." Matthias turned back to the minister. To his amazement, Reverend Christiansen was crying, both hands clasped over the wet stain in his pants.
"I can't - I can't - I've been so good . . ."
"See what happens when you deny what you are, Reverend?!" Matthias hissed in his ear. "It just builds up and builds up until you can't control it anymore and then it boils over like a pot and if you don't tell me where my friend is right this second, I'm going to start touching you."
Graham moaned.
"How sensitive are your nipples, Father?" Matthias purred in a voice that would have been the downfall of saints.
"J-Jack Spicer was in the troubled ward, b-but they're moving him to Wisconsin! They just took him down to the boat dock!"
Chase growled and ran for the gate, more than ready to be away from this holy place and the pain it brought. Phooka started to follow him, but paused a few feet away from the porch, looking back through the open door.
Graham gasped as a hot, slender body suddenly pressed tight against his own. Blue eyes that glittered like the sins of angels were mere inches from his own.
"Take my advice, Father," Matty murmured in a voice that radiated lust. "Go out and find someone to fuck. Even if you have to pay for it. It really is as good as you've heard."
Matthias's wet pink tongue darted out for a teasing lick on the minister's earlobe, then he tore himself away and ran out the door.
Phooka turned his rump towards the porch and Matty launched himself off the edge, bracing both hands on the kelpie's rump to leapfrog forward onto the horse's back.
Phooka tore out of the gate, catching up to Chase almost instantly.
In the distance, the sound of an outboard motor started up.
"You can't do this! This is like, kidnapping and brainwashing and if I had my JackBots, you'd all be mincemeat!" Jack howled, struggling against Brother Justin's iron grip.
"Now Jack, this really is all for your own good. I know you don't agree now, but you're only seventeen; your parents still have the authority to say what's best for you." Reverend Dallas said soothingly. "I'll see you as far as the next boat dock, then you'll be taken to Camp Serenity."
"Actually," JB said, stepping onto the dock. "Me an' Jack are gonna meander on outta here. Thanks for gettin' the boat ready for us."
Jack whipped around to look at the pigtailed girl.
"It's about time!" He snapped.
Brother Justin shoved Jack forward into Reverend Dallas's arms, then turned back to the girl.
"How did you get out of your room?!" He snapped. "You shouldn't fight us like this, Johnny Betty. We're trying to help you."
"I need your kinda help like I need t' squat with mah spurs on!" JB declared.
Brother Justin went to grab the teenaged girl, but she deftly avoided the lunge and then punched the man so hard his jaw shattered.
Reverend Dallas shoved Jack in the speed boat unceremoniously and scrambled for the key. Johnny Betty kicked the screaming Brother Justin into the water and leapt into the bow of the boat just as Steve cranked the engine and sent the speedboat lunging out into the lake.
Jack, having had much experience with the super powered ass-kicking crowd, threw himself into the stern and curled up into a small ball with his hands over his head.
"W-why are you doing this?!" Reverend Dallas cried. "We're just trying to help you! Don't you want to be normal?!"
"Ain't no such thing as normal!" JB declared.
"You call this help?!" Jack squawked.
"But you're just confused-!"
"I'm tired a' listenin' t' this," JB growled, stalking forward.
The teenager grabbed the minister by the front of his shirt and heaved him off of the back of the boat. After watching him flounder in their wake, the dark skinned maid grabbed the steering wheel and headed out into open water.
"Well, dip me in chocolate an' throw me t' th' lesbians!" She cried. "I do believe we're free!"
Jack gave her a look.
"Dip you in . . . . and you like guys with meat on their bones? I know someone you have to meet."
Brother Justin floundered to the edge of the dock, trying to gasp for air around the excruciating pain in his jaw. He managed to grab hold of the end of the dock and hung there for a moment. Some instinct tickled the back of his mind and Brother Justin tilted his head back and looked up.
There was a horse standing on the dock. A big black horse with far too much mane watched him struggling dispassionately. As Brother Justin watched, the face of a beautiful Chinese man appeared over the endless fall of mane.
Chase perched comfortably on the kelpie's back, Matty riding behind him.
"Where is my Jack?" He asked with deceptive softness.
Brother Justin could only answer with a noise of pain.
"I don't think he can answer, Phooka. Therefore, he is of no further use to me. But I don't believe you've eaten today, have you?"
Reverend Dallas floundered in the middle of the lake. How could Johnny Betty have thrown him in so effortlessly? It was impossible; such things didn't happen. Only God could bestow such powers on a mere mortal.
God . . .or Satan.
Steve coughed up water as he tried to freeze in shock.
A horse was running over the surface of the water towards him. He knew it was on the surface of the water, because he actually dipped below the surface and he could see the horse's hoof prints on the surface.
That was impossible; it was utterly and completely impossible.
The rider of the impossible beast seemed to take notice of him and the horse wheeled towards him.
"Where is my Jack?" The man asked.
"Our - our father, who art in heaven -" Steve began.
The horse was standing over him, blood dripping from the creature's mouth. The reverend knew instinctively it wasn't the horse's blood.
The rider flinched sharply at the recitation of the Lord's Prayer.
"Phooka, he's giving me a headache!" Chase snarled.
The last thing Steve Dallas ever saw was a plate sized hoof descending towards his face.
"You do realize you don't paid if I die?!" Jack snarled at the dark skinned girl driving the speedboat. "Where the hell are we? It looks like we're in the middle of the ocean!"
JB gave him a bored look.
"I haven't even come close to killin' you an' we lost th' group from Camp Brainwash, so-" Johnny Betty cut off sharply as she looked back over her shoulder. "Uh . . . these friends of yorn?"
Jack hazarded a peek over the engine block. Instantly he was on his feet, jumping and waving excitedly.
"It'sChaseit'sChaseit'sChaseit'sChaseit'sChase!" The tech wizard cried.
It was Chase, galloping towards the boat astride a magnificent black horse. The horse confused Jack for a moment, but several clues had him putting together the answer quickly. The horse's impossible beauty, green eyes, and blood spattered muzzle hinted that it wasn't an ordinary horse. The fact that it was galloping over the surface of an inland sea was a bit of a clue as well.
"Oh, he's riding Phooka! I never thought I'd be happy to say those words!" Jack cried. "I'm over here, Chase-baby!"
Phooka drew up alongside the boat, prancing showily. Matty was riding behind Chase, but honestly, Phooka could have been carrying a three piece orchestra playing the aria from the opera 'The Queen of the Night' and Jack wouldn't have noticed.
Not when Chase was here.
Chase, his Chase, his dark god, his wicked prince, the black sun in his evil sky. Jack lunged forward, arms outstretched, only to be knocked back into the boat as Chase met him halfway.
"Chase! Chase!" Jack whimpered, pressing hot biting kisses across the ancient warrior's lips and chin.
"Jack, my Jack! Jack-Pet," Chase growled, returning nip for nip and kiss for kiss.
The two men twined hard around each other, as if struggling to literally become one. Somewhere in the midst of the passionate grapple, their mouths met and instantly melted into each other. For a few minutes, there was no sound but the lap of water against the hull and the smack of lips and tongue. Chase finally tore his mouth from Jack's to gasp for air.
"You were stolen from me," he growled. "But I have come to claim you."
"Nobody could ever take me away from you, Chase!" Jack said fervently. "Not in any way that matters."
The endearments were interrupted by an equine groan of disgust. Chase threw the kelpie a nasty look. Matty swatted the horse's shoulder lightly.
"You be quiet," the blond chided. "It's so sweet!"
Phooka heaved a long-suffering sigh and looked away as Chase and Jack shared another deep, soul-searing kiss.
"Are my parents still alive?" Jack asked when they parted. He didn't seem particularly concerned over the question, just sort of mildly curious.
"Are they the ones responsible for this?" Chase asked. "They live. For the moment."
Distracted by dark thoughts of future murder, Chase stroked on hand down to meet Jack's and squeezed, not noticing the metal contraption on his love's finger. Jack yelped in pain. Chase instantly released his hand, looking down at the cast in shock.
"They tried to take my ring off." Jack said simply. "They broke my finger trying to get it off."
Chase snarled with hatred, wishing those responsible for the action were present so he could kill them again.
"And that idiot preacher prayed over the binding as it was set," Chase surmised, studying the cast. "Thus blocking the protective spell."
The dragon lord picked gingerly at the tape, then looked up in surprise as a wickedly sharp pocket knife was offered. The dragon lord blinked at the teenage girl holding it like he'd never seen her before, and in his inner dragon's rush to reclaim it's mate, he really hadn't noticed her.
"If th' cast is bad, cut it off." she said simply.
"Oh, this is Johnny Betty. She's kind of like my bodyguard now." Jack said.
"How do?" JB said politely.
Chase said nothing, merely took the knife offered and sliced off the bandage. The ancient warrior trembled was he saw the black and blue bruises, misshapen swelling and torn skin that marred Jack's long, artistic finger.
"We did not kill them slowly enough, Phooka." Chase announced.
Phooka merely licked his bloodstained lips and chewed. The dragon lord folded both of his hands over the injured digit and pressed them gently to his cheek.
"My beloved," he whispered as black light began to glow between his hands.
Jack hissed gingerly as heat spread through the finger, bordering on the pain threshold until Chase abruptly released him. Jack flexed his now perfect hand, grinning.
"Chase. I missed you," Jack murmured. "I missed you a lot."
Chase raised one elegant eyebrow at the note of hunger in his lover's voice. Without a word, he crushed the youth to his chest, kissing passionately and deeply. Jack melted into the kiss, pawing at Chase's chest and shoulders as if he wanted to climb the warlord. Instead, he found himself bent backwards over the engine cover and pawed at even more passionately.
The other three remained quiet until Jack reached down and started tugging Chase's sash loose. Johnny Betty let out a tiny, deliberate cough.
Chase raised one hand and snapped his fingers.
Chase, Jack, Phooka, Matty, Johnny Betty, the speedboat, and a significant amount of lake water materialized in the main hall of Chase's lair. Phooka staggered at the sudden change of footing, causing Matty to fall off of his back. JB pitched over the side of the boat as it rocked sharply, settling to one side on the flat surface. The thud of her hitting the ground, followed by a string of southern swears rang off of the rock walls.
The only ones not severely unsettled were Chase and Jack.
They looked deep into each other's eyes, shared a sly, sexy smile. Chase raised his hand once again and snapped his fingers, teleporting only himself and Jack away.
"They'll be in the bedroom." Matty declared, picking himself up. "We won't see them again today."
