Chapter 5

Snow watched her daughter as she sat back down at the table. There was obviously something on her mind. She just wished that Emma would come on out with it. She could tell that it was tearing her up inside and that Emma was scared.

"You want to tell me what is eating at you now?"

"Not really," Emma replied.

"Emma, you came over here to talk, not just sit here and stare at me. You even sent Henry away with the Mayor. I know that this has nothing to do with looking for the witch or the fact that you've come back to Storybrooke. So, what is it that brought you here?" Snow asked her.

"It is about Regina."

"What about her?" Snow asked, taking a sip of tea.

"She was the first thing that I remembered after I took the potion."

"Oh?"

"Yes, I already had Henry. But, a memory of her was the first thing that flashed through my brain. It wasn't of you or father. It wasn't of a time here with Henry. It was of Regina."

"And, that bothers you?"

"No, it doesn't."

"Then why are you so worried about it. What has you so upset about Regina that you would need to come talk to me about it? You have been vocal with her in the past. You've stood up to her. What is it about now that has you so worried?"

"It isn't really Regina that has me worried," Emma stated.

"Could you be more cryptic about this? Are you going to make me pry it out of you? Just tell me what is going on," Snow demanded.

"I think that I am in love with Regina," Emma blurted.

Snow slowly, carefully, almost methodically set her tea cup down on the table before her. She folded her hands in front of her. And, slowly, she looked up and met the eyes of her daughter. Snow didn't know what she was looking for in her daughter's pale but vivid green eyes, but she found nothing that would think that Emma was under some spell.

"I see."

"That is all you can say?"

"Do you want me to ask you if you are under some spell? Would that make you happy? What do you want me to say to you? Do you want me to be happy about this?" Snow asked.

"I don't know what I want you to say. I just felt like I should tell you. I don't know what I am doing. I don't know how it happened. All I know is that I had this feeling since I got back and nothing made sense until a few days ago, when I went to see Regina," Emma told her.

"What did she say?"

"We talked about some things that had been bothering me. I needed some clarification about my dreams and my memories while you were in the Enchanted Forest. There were things that I knew happened to you, things that didn't make sense to me then, things that I shouldn't have known or seen. There was a woman in them, someone that I knew but I couldn't remember," Emma stated.

"It was Regina?"

"I didn't know. I couldn't explain the familiarity of her. She was a woman that came to me in dreams. She was someone that I could talk to and she helped me with Henry. She was a comforting presence when I felt all alone. At first, I thought that she was mother. I thought that she was some queen in a magical place, but I didn't know that I was right. We would spend hours, days sometimes, just talking and walking in the gardens of the Winter palace. It wasn't until I consulted Henry's book that I knew it was the castle that you grew up in. I began to think that the woman was you in the beginning, but the more I remembered from my dreams while living in New York, I knew that she couldn't be my mother."

"Why?"

"It was the way she acted towards. There was a love, a feeling that went beyond familiar. It was more like a passion in depth rather than a consistency of blood."

"Did she…she love you in these dreams?"

"I think she did. I couldn't be certain, because they are dreams after all. I had to know. I had to know why it was Regina that I had been thinking about since I took the potion. I had to know why I smiled inside every time that I saw her. I needed to know why I wanted to see her so much," Emma stated.

"You were drawn to her?"

"Like you to David," Emma replied.

"I see."

"Please don't."

"Please don't, what, Emma?"

"Don't bring up the fact that she was the 'Evil Queen'." Snow started, "But, you have to understand why this concerns me. She tried to destroy our family so many times, but even I couldn't stay angry with her for that after Neverland. She had tried to pay for her sins. She had done everything to keep Henry safe and happy. It doesn't surprise me that she found a way into your dreams so she could be closer to him. I am sure that she was very depressed and upset that we were stuck in the Enchanted Forest with no way to get back to you."

"She was. I could tell. I don't think that she could go to Henry. Somehow, however, she could get to me. And, before you ask, I don't think that was her plan. I think that she was trying to get to Henry. I don't know how or why, but I am thankful for what she did, coming to me in dreams," Emma explained.

"You're grateful for her coming to your dreams? Emma, she used you a vessel to get to your son. You were just a connection to Henry," Snow stated.

"In the beginning, yes, I believe that I was. As time went on, I don't think that was case. Our conversations turned from Henry to me. It was like she was trying to get to know me, like she wanted to know more about me, not just want she had assumed or learned about in my brief time in Storybrooke."

"Your conversations changed?"

"Yes, she actually cared about me. She asks about me before she would bring up Henry towards the end. It was as if the mere thought of Henry being unhappy plagued her. I am sure that it did, but he was happy. She would ask me if he was happy and then move on to other subjects."

"Such as?" Snow asked.

"How things were my bounty hunter business? Was I dating anyone? Did they like Henry? Did Henry like them? But, she seemed to take a marked interest in my well-being," Emma stated.

"Of course she did. You are Henry's mother. Henry would want you to be happy. If you aren't happy, then Henry isn't happy. We all know that."

"Then why did she kiss me?"

Snow shook her head in disbelief. She stared into the viridian eyes of her daughter, but she couldn't come up with a good answer. Why would Regina kiss her? Was she trying to get back at Snow by getting with her daughter? Even Regina wasn't that shallow and…evil.

"I don't know."

"I didn't either."

"What happened then?"

"I felt like I couldn't wait to go to sleep. I couldn't wait to see her again. I couldn't wait to talk to her, to be with her, just walk through the woods with her. I didn't care. I couldn't wait to go to sleep at night and I hated to wake up. Things seemed better in my dreams…with her," Emma replied.

"They usually do, Emma. That is why they are dreams. They give us hope."

"She did give me hope. She gave me hope that I would find my family one day. I didn't know that I found them and lost them, again. I was still going off of pre-Storybrooke memories plus the altered ones that she gave me. They were all happy memories, but some things even a spell can't change. I was still an orphan. I was still Emma Swan, the lost girl that no one wanted. But, in my new reality, I had kept Henry. I was the one that raised him. The memories she gave me had to be a compilation of hers mixed with mine. The only problem was my time in Storybrooke."

"I thought you said that you were in New York. What does that have to do with Storybrooke? What did she do with those memories?"

"She couldn't let me keep them. I would have come back here looking for you all. She knew that. So, when Henry would have come to find me and bring me to Storybrooke, in our reality, there was an apartment fire and we moved to New York thanks to an old boss that wanted to give me his business. It just worked out. I got Henry in a good school. He made friends fast. It wasn't like we were really starting over. It was like we were just moving on from Boston. I don't know how to explain it. I can't really explain it," Emma told her.

"She gave you a better life, a happy life," Snow said, almost begrudgingly.

"She did. I almost didn't want to come back here, Mom. We were happy. Henry was happy. He was doing well in school. He knows that something is off. He knows that me being here is more than just a case. He will be good and not question it for a while, but eventually…"

"He'll start asking questions that we won't be ready to answer?"

"Exactly."

Snow picked up her cup of tea and took a sip. Emma did the same thing. She watched Snow's mannerisms and smiled.

"What?" Snow asked.

"Henry does the same thing when he is nervous about telling me something," Emma stated.

"Does what?"

"You both have a tell when you drink something from mug," Emma explained.

"I am sure that you do it, too, then," Snow affirmed.

"I know I do. It is just funny how much I act like you and David, but you weren't the ones that raised me. It amazes me how much of Neal and Regina I see in Henry, but then I see you and Charming in him, too."

"Emma…"

"Look, I'm sorry. I know that I shouldn't have told you anything. I don't know what to do."

"What do you mean?"

"The only true relationship that I have ever had with anyone was with Neal and we both know how that worked out."

"Does she care for you?"

"I believe that she does."

"And, that isn't enough for you?" Snow asked her pointedly.

"Would it be for you?"

"I would be looking for the dagger she was going to plunge into my heart, but I am not the one that she kissed, Emma. That was you. I can't speak for Regina. I don't know her feelings for you. I only know what you have told me. Have you talked with her about this?"

"A little."

"And?"

"She is afraid of you," Emma answered matter-of-factly.

"She should be."

"Snow!"

"What? You're my daughter. I wouldn't want her to hurt you. But, there is one thing that I know about Regina and I know it better than most," Snow stated.

"Yeah, and what's that?"

"She loves fiercely and with all of her heart when she does love someone. She will do whatever it takes for the ones that she loves. She would endure Hell on Earth if she thought that it would bring her to the ones that she loves and to keep them safe. Her entire gambit against your father and me was because of a mistake that I made in trusting her mother when I was child. She went on a rampage because her mother killed her boyfriend."

"Yeah, but she came after you," Emma said.

"Because, I was the one who told her mother about Daniel. It was my fault that he died. I was the one who couldn't keep a secret. I didn't know what Cora was capable of doing until I was older. By then, it was too late for me to try to salvage a relationship with Regina. I had become the object of her rage and she needed to destroy it. I didn't understand her pain…fully…until I saw your father, lying in his own blood, holding his sword, just after he put you in the wardrobe."

"You never…"

"Said anything about that? No, I couldn't. I was cursed for twenty-eight years just after that. I had to live here as a school teacher, who was afraid of her own shadow most days, for twenty-eight years. Then one day, this smart, sassy, bold and brazen blonde comes to town bringing Henry home. I immediately felt a connection to you, a camaraderie, if you will. You trusted me when you trusted no one else. You fought for me when no one else would. I know what that meant to me as your friend, but after realizing that I was your mother…. It made if even more special to me, because I remembered what you said about growing up here," Snow explained.

"You care for her, too?"

"Regina? Yes, I do. She saved my life. She was to be my step-mother. She was only a few years older than me and she treated me more like a kid sister in the beginning. I loved her for it. I wanted a mother, but I wanted someone who would be a friend and a companion. It was lonely being a princess sometimes," Snow stated.

"And, you wanted that life for me?"

"Not my life, no. I wanted so much more for you. I wanted you to experience…everything, the balls, the gowns, the feasts. I wanted to teach you to ride a horse and shoot an arrow. I am sure that your father would have taught you to use a sword. You could have been anything that you wanted to be."

"I still can."

"Emma, tell me truthfully: do you love her?"

"I think that I might."

"You think?"

"I don't know, but I know that she makes me happy and that I want to be with her."

"Alright."

"That's it? Alright? What the hell does that mean?"

"It means that I won't stop you. I want you to follow your heart and find your happiness, Emma, even if it is with Regina. I don't have to like it, but it is your choice. I won't stand in your way. I will however expect your father to have a very long talk with her," Snow said simply.

"A long talk? He isn't going to pull some shotgun out and demand that she marries me, is he? Because I don't think that either of us would handle that situation very well," Emma replied

"No, he won't do that. I am sure that he will want to know what her intentions are with you. You are still royalty. There are certain things that must be done. Besides, it isn't your father you need to be worried about telling. He is always on the side of love. You're proof of that. Plus, I'll talk to him," Snow explained.

"Who should we be worried about then?" Emma asked.

"Henry."

"Why?"

"He doesn't know who he really is, anymore."