Nick's letter. He's almost a brother in-law to Claire, so it's just normal that he's writing something for her too, but the thought didn't even crossed my mind till a girl asked me about it. than I spent a whole week trying to come up with something. I don't like Nick very much, sorry, I just can't understand how his mind works most of the times, so be kind. Anyway I'm pretty proud of the result. Maybe a bit confusing, but Nick IS confused… lol…

-7-

Hi Claire,

Nick here. Like the others at Drovers I've been 'kindly' invited at write you a letter to leave it to great-grandsons and daughters...

I kind of know this letter will be the only contact I'll be able to have with you because Alex or Tess never leaves you! Neither of them will let me relieve them even for a few hours! They remind me of you when you had to walk Sirocco all night long!

I have to admit I was sort of troubled when I thought about what I wanted to write to you, we haven't really talked much lately… Some time ago we used to chat about everything… Now, when something happens to you, I had to stand aside, like when you had that horse accident with Peter… Tess and Alex were at your bedside while I sat in a chair on the other side of the room…

Seeing how things went, now it's quite amusing thinking of our Dads plan to stick us together.

In a certain way my parents were right seeing me with you and not with Tess. Between your sister and me there's an awfully strong bond, and I don't think it'll never be untied, however when we are together there's always something blocking us, something squeaking.

Sometimes when I'm with her I feel like I'm in heaven, but other times I feel uncomfortable, and this never happened with you, not even in our most embarrassing moments (do you remember Tess when entered your room and found us kissing, when you fell from the tractor, almost three years ago).

It's unbelievable how many things have changed since then…

Talking about changes, I'm so happy for you and Alex, I never thought I'd see him so happy with a woman! I swear to you it's been quite a shock for me to see him so changed!

I guess it was predictable from how he reacted when Vince Lavise was giving you too much attention, or so Alex thought. Now I have to say it was definitely jealousy!

Anyway I have to thank you. You tamed him, now he's a lot more tolerable and helpful and it's simpler to handle him…

I reckon you McLeod's always seem to have something wrong! At first Tess, then you…

I don't think I can even describe to you the look on Alex' face when they were putting you in the ambo, I've never seen him so scared!

As soon as we arrived in hospital he immediately began to react. He didn't let his despair have the upper hand.

I thought for sure he would break everything he came in contact with, maybe also everyone, yet he stayed quite calm.

I don't know what I'd do if it was me… If we hadn't found that Tess was healthy I don't think I could have ever forgiven myself for all the time I wasted with her (I guess this is partially what Alex feels about you…). I never really tried to work things out with Tess…

Do you think that one day Tess and I could have what you and Alex already have? Does the 'right moment' actually exist? And what if it exists but we've already lost it?

After all the ups and downs between us, I don't know anymore how to behave or what to think…

These days I'm trying to be there for Tess, without expecting anything in return because I know she has definitely something else on her mind, but I keep wondering if this 'right moment' will ever arrive and if so when.

Nowadays I think I can only wait. If I'm the right person for her like she's the right person for me (and I just had the confirmation 'cause I chatted about her all letter long), all will be fine…

About you, almost sister in law, come back to Drovers soon, before your Alex gets bored with all this 'perfect boyfriend' thing and starts up again with his old behaviour…

Kisses

Nick