Note: Nothing you recognize belongs to me. Review if you'd like to.
Time moved at a glacial pace after Callen left, seconds seeming like hours and minutes like days. It didn't help that the cabin had turned into a veritable sauna, the windows placed high on the wall were firmly and permanently closed, allowing no breeze to enter the small building. As a result, the temperature in the cabin had skyrocketed, with the humidity so high that Kensi could swear she could reach out and touch the air. She had completely done away with most of her clothing, dressed only enough so as not to be indecent, in a pair of short gym shorts and a ribbed tank top. Nobody would be coming by the cabin, so she hadn't bothered with her alias, although if anybody showed up she could always duck into the bathroom to change. She was also grateful for the opportunity to let that damned vest stretch out, so maybe when she had to wear it she'd actually be able to breathe.
As hot as it was in the cabin, Deeks hadn't removed his shirt, which surprised Kensi immensely, since he went and dunked his head under the tap every two minutes, so he had to be burning up.
"Deeks, you must be boiling alive."
He wiped water out of his eyes and looked up at her, hair dripping onto his shirt, which was more or less soaked through with a mixture of tap water and sweat.
"Uh huh."
"You know, one of the benefits of being a man is that it's socially acceptable to take your shirt off in front of people."
"Eh, I'll live."
Kensi was shocked that he hadn't taken the opportunity to make a crack about her just wanting to see him shirtless. He really did look like he was suffering though, so she had no idea why he was resisting.
"Seriously Deeks, it's too hot in here to be stubborn, you're going to get heat stroke."
She could see him begin to sway on his feet and his eyes going glassy.
"Oh for the love of God, Deeks," she walked over to him and pushed him into a chair "I thought you would have learned from the spectacle I made of myself yesterday, this heat is dangerous."
She went into one of the small drawers in the kitchen and pulled out a dish towel, which she soaked in cold water, before walking back to Deeks and hoisting his shirt up and over his head and resting the cold towel against his forehead.
"I mean really, it's not like I've never seen you shirtless before, this is nothing new."
She filled a cup with cold water and pushed it into his hands, something on his chest catching her eye as he brought it to his lips.
"Deeks," she started, quietly "what's that?"
"What's what?" he half slurred, still drinking his water.
"On your chest, it's a tattoo."
"Well you've answered your own question then, haven't you?"
Kensi's eyes were fixed on his chest, apparently she hadn't been entirely correct when she'd said seeing him shirtless was nothing new, because the tattoo definitely hadn't been there the last time she'd seen his chest, and there was nothing she didn't remember from that night, so no way she'd missed it. No, this was definitely new. And it appeared to be a plant, not just any plant, on his left pectoral, right above his heart, she noted. He'd had a fern tattooed over his heart. When? When she had been away? Once she'd been back? Somehow everything Deeks did lately brought more questions than it did answers, and this was no exception.
She didn't even realize she'd sat down opposite him and let her fingers trace over the plant until he sighed softly.
"Deeks, when did you get this?"
"Christmas."
Kensi could feel her breath trapped in her throat, tears suddenly pricking at her eyes as the temperature in the room seemed to jump even higher. She blinked frantically and tried desperately to swallow the lump in throat, with little success.
"Oh" she barely managed to get the syllable out without her voice breaking.
Deeks was dizzy and nauseous and dripping with a mix of sweat and water, but when Kensi's fingers ghosted over his chest he felt shivers run up his spine and he couldn't help but sigh, the simple touch feeling much better than it should have. The look on Kensi's face, however, was impossible to read. She looked like she was about to cry, but also like she was steeling herself to say something unpleasant. His overheated head couldn't make sense of it, and when he thought later about the words that came out of his mouth, he wished he could slap himself upside the head.
"It doesn't matter Kens, I was drunk when I got it. It's not a big deal, it doesn't mean anything."
As soon as the words left his mouth he wished he could take them back. Every one of them was a bold faced lie, but the way she had looked at him terrified him, it was like she was trying to work up the courage to crush his hopes. Like she couldn't quite figure out how to say that her feelings had changed, and that she didn't want to hurt his feelings, but nothing would happen between them. And so he lied, uselessly trying to keep a shred of his pride, which he knew had long gone out the window when it came to her.
Kensi just nodded, forcing out two words before claiming she needed a shower.
"Right. Good."
And then she was gone, and he wasn't sure if he heard soft crying behind the door, or if the heat had fully jumbled his brain.
As soon as the door closed behind her, Kensi completely broke down. Turning the shower on in the hope that Deeks wouldn't hear her, she sank to the floor and buried her face in her hands.
How was it that he managed to do this to her? She wasn't someone who cried over men, not even when Jack had left. Then, she'd gotten angry and depressed, but she'd never actually cried, it just wasn't really something she did. Until Deeks apparently. She hated that he got to her like this, but she realized that it was probably because she'd never had feelings like this for anyone. Sure, she'd loved Jack, and she'd had feelings for guys before, but not like this. This was different, on a completely different level that she had never known existed. And right now, she hated it.
Deeks had gotten a fern tattoo, but then brushed it off like it was nothing. Was it actually nothing? Or was he just embarrassed? Or maybe he'd gotten it and his feelings had changed? Her head spun with a combination of the heat and trying to figure Deeks out, so she stripped off her clothes and stepped under the frigid spray, letting the water cool her down and attempting to wash away what had been a very confusing day.
When Kensi emerged from the shower, she had come to the decision that if Deeks wanted something from her, he'd have to just come out and tell her. She was tired of playing games and trying to guess what everything meant, but most of all she was tired of being the one who always seemed to get hurt. No more, she decided as she got dressed again, the ball was firmly in his court and she was just going to focus on doing her job and trying not to embarrass herself so spectacularly.
