Ludwig Beilscmidt was out shopping. Recently, he started to notice that his trailer home decor was looking a bit... dull. He decided that a nice piece of furniture would fit in well in his tattered home. Besides, all of his current furniture was falling apart, so wouldn't it be good to have one new thing to offset all the broken things? Germany thought so.
So here he was at some furniture warehouse, perusing the items with interest. So far, everything he had looked at had been way over his budget. And considering he only brought 50 dollars in cash, he couldn't really afford to go above his budget. Literally.
He continued to wander, which apparently caught the eye of a sales employee, who thought that maybe he could guide the German man to the more expensive items.
"Do you need help looking for anything, sir?" The employee asked with a dazzling smile.
Germany jumped a bit at the unexpected human interaction. "Um, yes," he said, his accent showing through heavily. "Is there anything I can buy for under 50 dollars?"
The salesman's smile fell as he realized this customer was not a moneymaker. "Well, we do have a few returned lamps in the back that are marked down, if you want to look at those."
Germany beamed. "Please, take me to those!"
The employee led Germany to the back of the store, where the clearance items were. Some of them were broken, but most were just returned items. Germany ran to them like a child in a candy store.
"I that's all you need...?" the employee muttered as he walked away. He had more important, richer customers to worry about.
Germany was the only one back here. He was alone with all of these beautiful lamps. The thought exhilarated him. He wondered if anyone could even see him back here...
Ludwig became increasingly more aroused, but he forced himself to focus on all the lamps lined up for him. He looked at the different intricate designs adorning them, the different style and color of the lampshades... It was almost overwhelming. Germany fanned his face, noticing he was a bit overheated. His erection was pressing into his bicycle shorts, a big (or small) reminder that these lamps were just waiting for him to take them.
He looked around discreetly, making sure no one could see him. He then rolled off his bicycle shorts, exposing his boner to the lamps. He could feel himself starting to sweat as he tried to figure out which one he should make love to...
He finally settled on a gorgeous lamp with a circular, black shade. He looked at it with lust in his eyes, leaning in to smell it. It smelled like new plastic and a great bargain. At this point, Germany couldn't even contain himself. Without any lubrication, he started rubbing his penis up against the pole of the lamp. He groaned in ecstasy as his penis dryly grinded against the cool metal. He could feel himself approaching orgasm.
But he wasn't ready to be done. He had to find another way to make love to this magnificent object. He pulled the shade off of the lamp and stared into it. He noticed a small hole where you can place the lampshade onto the finial of the lamp...
Bingo.
Germany lubed himself up and shoved his tiny penis into the hole in the lampshade. He could feel himself on the edge; this was pure heaven. He was in bliss as he repeatedly slammed himself into the lampshade. He knew this was where he was meant to be.
He could feel the white hot pleasure building up in his lower regions. He finally let go, and with a guttural roar, he came all over the lampshade.
He was later banned from the furniture warehouse, but he got to keep the lamp. He thought the cumstained lampshade complimented his other furniture quite nicely.
The end
