chapter four! okay, I can't sleep lately, so I decided to write another chapter. Yes girls and boys this chapter contains smut, but not complete smut, this is merely a taster of what is to come. So yes this chapter is rated M for smut, swearing and angsty angst. I do not own soul eater~


chapter four- bittersweet memories taste like vodka and coke

I lean back in my chair and listen to the sound of the clock ticking, a hypnotic rhythm that almost lulls me back to my brilliant fields of orange. Thoughts rush around my head like bees in a hive, threatening to deafen me with the messy clamouring of words. What do I say, how do I say it, and how will soul react? will he reject me, possibly ruining what's left of our friendship after that night, the drunken blur that I cannot possibly forget. I sigh, letting my mind turn once again to those memories, memories that I know soul still holds within the darkest corners of his mind, and most probably try's to forget.

The smell of vodka and coke is sweet on his breath as he leans in, my heart skips a beat, my mouth agape in shock and confusion. "Soul...?" I whisper softly, my voice wavering nervously, as if to speak too loudly would shatter some invisible barrier between us. Without warning a hand snakes inside my shirt to caressingly curve around my waist, leaving trails of fire in its wake, burning perfection across my skin.

A gasp escapes my lips, earning a wicked grin from soul. "What are you doing?" I whimper, "what I've wanted to do for a long time..." he drawls, his crimson eyed gaze dragging hungrily down my body. Hot breath at my ear sends a white-hot jolt of pleasure through me and sets my pulse racing; followed by a command, gentle and innocent, but enough still to promise my deepest fantasies, come to life. "Close your eyes Maka..."

With bated breath my eyelids flutter closed, darkness envelops the world, heightening even the slightest of sensations felt. A strong hand finds the sensitive skin of my throat, and fingers glide, with alternating pressure, downward. I feel my breathing hitch and tremor uncontrollably to his every touch, I am putty in his hands, and still I keep my eyes firmly closed, revelling in this new found pleasure.

His hand lingers at my chest, feeling my heart beat, a quickening yet steady thumping beat. With a satisfied hum of approval soul pushes me slowly backward, to lay on the couch. The plush upholstery creeks as weight is shifted from beside me to the sweet pressure on top of my hips and thighs, igniting such arousal that arches my back and let's a moan tumble from my parted lips. Instantly embarrassed I feel my face flush hot, I realise soul is straddling me. Once again I sense hot breath ghost over my face and neck, my eyelids fluttering in delight, as this new and peculiar hunger spreads like wildfire within my very core.

"Maka..." His voice, devilish and coaxing is at my ear again, hypnotizing as a snake charmer. My hips involuntarily buckle upward, my eyes popping wide open in surprise, and the instant eye contact between us incinerates my resolve. The sight before me taking my breath away; his hair is messily tousled, eyes heady with longing, boring into mine.

"kiss me." I growl, unable to withstand such teasing any longer. The air grows silent save the sound of our ragged breathing mingling at such delicious proximity. Cool fingers carefully tilt my face upward, his eyes narrow, taking in every bit of me, and then warm, soft lips are roughly pressed against mine, and I am undone.

Reluctantly my mind moves onward to the next day, the beginning of the end. Cool morning light filters through the gaps in the shutters, I lazily open my eyes, heavy with the after effects of alcohol, to see soul. This would be all fine and good of course if we weren't both naked under a sheet on the couch.

As memories of the night before come flooding back I slap my hands over my mouth to contain the scream that threatens to wake the whole neighbourhood, and try not to allow myself to panic. Failing miserably at this, I hop up clutching the sheet around me, and dash around the room, collecting my scattered articles of clothing.

Miraculously I didn't trip on something in my haste and end up waking soul, but I suppose luck was on my side, kind of. With everything bundled unceremoniously in my arms and a white sheet hanging haphazardly around my naked body I almost fling myself into my bedroom, shutting the door tightly (but quietly) behind me. I dress myself and try to prepare for the inevitable confrontation, pacing my room and wringing my hands.

Suddenly it occurs to me, soul was the one to make the first move, a burst of adrenaline runs through me as I rush to process what this means. Does soul want to be with me? Is this the beginning of a new relationship, the thing I've dreamed of happening with soul for so long now. With a deep breath I open the door to my bedroom, hours having now passed, I am ready for this. Little did I know I wasn't ready for what I was faced with at all.

Step by agonising step I reach the living room, and there he sits, fully clothed and watching television. I try to swallow the lump in my throat, before I finally speak. "Hay soul" I almost squeak. He turns to me, his usual grin on his face "sup Maka?" He greets cheerfully, before turning back to the television. I am utterly dumbstruck. For lack of anything better to do with myself I walk numbly to the kitchen, sliding open the drawer containing pain killers and pour a glass of water, this will ease the headache but the pain I am yet to feel won't be so easy to dull.

"Maka, could you throw me in some of those, I've got a headache like you would not believe!" He pauses and then continues, a note of laughter in his voice "I got drunk last night and passed out on the couch, not sure why but... I woke up naked... that's the last time I mix my drinks eh?" my jaw drops, and so does the glass of water I was holding, as though in slow motion. Glass shards litter the floor, the water forming a kind of hydra, before gravity forces the beast to disperse into a puddle on the floor.

Soul runs in with a look of concern on his face at hearing the sudden noise, before glancing down at the kitchen floor, noticing the mess. "Maka you alright? You don't look so good." He asks, looking into my eyes searchingly. I stare back unblinkingly. "I dropped my glass." I respond bluntly, my voice sounding broken, so I lightly cough, knowing soul will probably just put it down to a cold.

"Uhh, do you want me to help you clean that up?" He asks worriedly, already moving toward the cupboard where we keep the broom. "Nah" I sigh, forcing a smile with every bit of strength I've got. "I can handle it" I add, he grins looking relived "cool" he says, and holds up a peace sign, before walking back into the other room.

I spend the next half hour slowly sweeping the dampness and shards into a pile, as I battle with my conflicting emotions. So I form an orderly check list in my mind before deciding what the hell I should do. Okay, so first point, I have feelings for soul, apparently strong feelings, which is probably why I can feel the hot sting of tears pricking behind my eyes. That much I know.

Second point, I lost my virginity to soul last night, and I would be totally okay with this, if not overjoyed if he felt them same, or even a little better about it if he so much as damn remembered. It's not his fault or mine I know, but that doesn't stop the hurt, and I'm not sure if anything ever will.

I slowly emerge from the bittersweet, agonising memories, and become aware that I am crying. It's not the first time, this is my nightly routine, the one reason I have been cursed to sleepless nights for months now. The only comfort these memories can provide me is the reassurance that the events that plague me did in fact happen, as from time to time I look at soul and realise how much I care for him, and wonder if I am crazy, if it was all just a surreal dream like professor steins eerie house in the bright orange field of my subconscious.

I drag an already damp sleeve over my tear soaked, aching eyes, and wearily glance at the clock, two forty-five am. I am about to give in to the sweet surrender of sleep once more, reunite with my wibbly wobbly dream world, when I hear something that makes my stomach twist sickeningly, a desperate and pained sob. And what is the reason this sound stops my heart in its tracks; it came from souls room.


smut here and smut there, next chapter will be the final one, or maybe not it depends, but there is definite soulXmaka in the near future. Thank you for reading and reviews are always welcome!