1Chapter Seven: Atonement

"Rose...Rose are you alright? Please speak to me" Scorpius had lifted her from the ground and was now shaking her gently. There seemed to be some sort of pain to her head–which was what had initially made her fall to the floor–but now she seemed to be falling unconscious, her eyes rolling backwards into her skull. Scorpius clutched Rose to his chest, and stroked her thick hair. He took her pulse and checked her breathing, which both seemed to be normal.

Scorpius desperately wished that he was already a healer, because he had no idea what to do. Him and Rose were friends again...and that meant everything in the world to Scorpius. Despite the fact that Rose had fallen unconscious for an unknown reason, he felt inextricably calm. It was as if...a strange weight had been lifted from his shoulders that he didn't even know was there. He was there for Rose now, and he would never let her go.

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Pain. Searing Pain. Searing Pain in the Head, and suddenly, it was gone. But, what was left in its place was much, much more devastating. She remembered it all. Their time on the train, the long hours spent laughing together, and...the omission of his father's name. The meeting that never happened replayed through her head and her cousin's voice echoed through her head... "He just wants to hurt you..."

Rose looked up to see Scorpius' concerned face above her own, and it was just too much for her. She had...she had to get away and think.

"Scorpius...I..." was all she could get out before sprinting out of the doors to their common quarters.

She ran on auto pilot not caring where she ended up. She ran until it was physically taxing, and then she slowed to a jog. When she started walking at a normal pace, she realized she had brought herself to the most familiar place to her...the Library.

She muttered the prefect's after hours password and entered the hardwood doors. The smell of dusty tomes filled her nostrils which caused an instant sedation to occur. As she brushed her hand across the rows of books while she walked past them, thousands of images flooded into her mind.

She reviewed hours spent in this high-ceilinged room...studying magic and avoiding bullies. She sat at one of the windows at the end of one of her favourite book stacks. She took out her wand, performed a calming charm on herself and thought.

We were friends...he concealed his identity...he treated her badly...the meeting that never happened...their rekindling of friendship...her feelings for him...her headaches...the bond...

Everything was so confusing...Rose thought about it all late into the night, never coming to a conclusion.

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The clock turned to 03:00 and Scorpius realized that she wasn't going to come back tonight. He would give her some space. Obviously the whole ordeal had shaken her mentally and physically. He would be polite and supportive until she was ready to open up to him once more.

The events of the night had caused him a strange inability to sleep, yet a cloud of calmness hazed throughout his soul. As a habit, he found the forest in his mind. He saw the clearing...and there, sitting in it, licking his paws, was a small white tiger.

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Rose woke with a start...which was understandable as she now found herself hanging upside down in the air.

"Well good morning Roooooooosie" said a leering upside-down version of Amelia Hikui, "did you sleep well with your best friends?"

"Ooooo" said another girl in the group, "I bet she was making out with all her favourite books all night."

"Yah," said Amelia holding up Rose's wand, "cuz we all know that's the only way she's ever gonna get snogged."

The group giggled and looked up at Rose as if she were some sort of circus act.

"Come on Ammy! Make her pay!" said Belinda Lindsey, "My cousin was expelled last night and she was the last person seen with him!"

"If anyone's going to be paying Belinda, it's going to be all of you. Amelia, put her down. Now." said a familiar voice from the end of the book stack. Gretchen Neilson was there, standing resolute with her arms crossed.

"Well...w-what if I don't want to?" balked Amelia, obviously surprised by the sudden turn of events, "Wouldn't you want us to be doing this...?"

"What you are doing is childish and stupid. Put the girl down." Said Gretchen in a stony voice. "Are you a Hufflepuff or not? Show some loyalty!"

At this, Amelia let Rose down gently to the floor. Rose tilted her pounding head backwards, trying to reverse the blood that had fell down to her head. When she looked up again all the girls were gone, except for Gretchen who was holding out a hand to help her up. Rose narrowed her eyes and did not accept the hand.

"Why did you do that? Why should I trust you with anything?" said Rose icily, looking away from Gretchen's honest-looking grey eyes.

"I...need you to hear me out...I don't expect that whatever I tell you will help with what has happened to you, or make you forgive me in away way, but I must atone with my sins. Will you listen to what I have to say?" Said Gretchen with a slight shake to her usually strong soprano.

"As a Gryffindor–and a decent human being–I am bound to at least to listen to what you have to say...but if you say anything I don't like, I will leave. Know that I will not take your abuse any longer." replied Rose.

"I understand." said Gretchen resolutely, "Now let me tell you everything."

"I'm sorry about the way I've treated you all these years...it would seem that insecure people only truly make themselves feel better by putting others down...and I am very insecure. The truth is...I've been jealous of you ever since we were children. You're beautiful...you're intelligent...you're independent...in short you're everything I wish I was. This year when you got to room with Scorpius...something inside of me snapped. All these years of bitter emotions welling inside of me erupted into a passionate hate that I had never truly felt before. Scorpius has always had a special place in my heart. His looks...his demeanor...something about him makes me go crazy. When I saw you getting closer to him...I just couldn't stand it. This caused me to do a terrible thing.

"I'm the one who got Marcus to go after you. I told him to take advantage of you...and hurt you to make you pay..."

"You what!" exclaimed Rose suddenly, fire entering her gaze, searing a hole into Gretchen.

"I...I...got him to...look please let me finish. This is really hard for me." said Gretchen, and Rose calmed seeing tears start to form at the corners of her eyes.

"So you wanted Scorpius? Why did you need to hurt me? You got with him anyways didn't you?" asked Rose.

"In fact...no I did not. He came to me that one night angry about something. He brought me back to his chambers and stripped me of my clothes. As we were just about to begin, he stopped and said that he couldn't do it out of revenge of another. He said if we dated for a bit he would consider it. I told him that I guess I would make a special case for him...and he became very angry. He said he would not be used by me and called me a whore. Since I couldn't go back to my room, he let me sleep on the floor of his room...and it was there that I regained my memories.

"...have you ever heard of Teenage witch selective amnesia disorder...or TWSAD?"

"Umm...actually...yes" said Rose in surprise

"Well...it would seem that my desire, my idol, Scorpius calling me a whore caused memories from the summer of my first year to come back to me. I'm not a bad person really...but him calling me a whore...showed me for what I was. I used boys, I use my friends and I insult everyone around me...it was all because of a certain incident..." A tear fell down Gretchen's face causing a streak of foundation to form in its wake.

"Look Gretchen...you don't have to tell me all of this...you're really upset...I..." said Rose feeling uneasy having seen the usually haughty Gretchen show any human emotion.

"No! Rose...I don't know why, but I feel I need to tell you this. I've always admired you...just...I don't know why but I thought you would understand..." said Gretchen as more tears slid down her cheeks.

"Alright...tell me Gretchen, I will listen." said Rose in return, "just try and relax."

"When I was 11 years old...I was abused sexually by our next door neighbour. He would put the Imperius charm on me...and make me do horrible things with him...I was under his control for two months...I would go over to his house every day at the same time...he told my mother I was getting piano lessons from him...he controlled me...all the time...he would take pictures when his friends would come over...and..and..." Gretchen's eyes glazed over with the horror of her past.

"One day I finally escaped from his spell...I told my mother who contacted the aurors...he was taken away...and my memories disappeared. We moved to a different town right away...and then I started school. My mother never mentioned it...and I have no Father so...it just disappeared. But...I changed in personality. I became very angry...and spiteful. I had an issue with control. I had this obsession with controlling other people, especially boys. I know now that it was because...because...I never wanted to be controlled by someone ever...again..." Gretchen broke down into sobs, her body shaking with them.

Without knowing why, Rose found herself holding the other girl, stroking her hair...comforting her. Gretchen rocked back and forth and continued to speak when the worst of the sobs subsided.

"This all...came back to me in a flash that night. I took shower after shower that night...trying to become clean...I felt...tainted...dirty...then you came in. I saw how he felt for you...cared for you. In that moment...I wanted to make right all the pain I had caused everyone in 6 years...I wanted most in the world for you and Scorpius to be happy together. It was then that I returned to my room and told Marcus to stop what he was doing. It would seem...that he wasn't under my control as I had thought. Control...is an illusion...a facade for the weak. He had been waiting all along to show his true colours...to do something truly evil. He told me that he was going to continue with his plan to rape you that night.

"I was going to kill myself...I felt horrible. My last chance of redemption had failed...I lay in my bed all day sobbing. At night, I drew up some courage and I went out to the Forbidden Forest...hoping that a wild beast of some kind would find me and tear me apart to ease my suffering...but there, on the edge of the woods...was Hagrid's Hut. It was a beacon of hope...a lighthouse welcoming me back from the sea of despair I was drowning in...I pounded on his door...I told Hagrid what Marcus was going to do to you...I didn't know where he was but I told Hagrid to check the Hotels in town...I went straight to Professor Dumas' office afterwards and told him the same. He contacted Hagrid somehow and told him that you were in the Hog's Head...and then I waited. I sat outside the Hospital Wing for hours...and when you were finally carried past me...I breathed a sigh of relief. You were safe, and I was told that Hagrid had found you in the nick of time.

"So you see...I'm not looking for a Thank You...what I've done to you in the past doesn't equate to these recent actions...I just wanted you to know that...I...I've always admired you...and...I want to be your friend. I know that you'll most likely say no but..."

"Gretchen. Thank you...you saved my life. I always knew you weren't a bad person really...I knew somehow that you were hurt somehow...I've actually had a recent encounter with unpleasant forgotten memories and...I understand what it's like. I admire your bravery...and I accept your offer of friendship." said Rose, who too now was crying.

As the Bell rang, the two girls held each other, not in penance, but in silent reconciliation.

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For the next few weeks, the weather became colder in direct proportion to Rose's disposition. She behaved extremely formal in the presence of Scorpius, and they conversed as if they were Book Club members. All topics remained censored to school work and Scorpius hated it. He missed her...he missed their animated discussions over Potions' theory...he missed giving her massages...but most of all he was dying to tell her about the new development in his Animagus practicing.

One particularly snowy November morning, Scorpius was getting ready for class and found that he could not find his favourite green Towel. He glanced over at Rose, who was getting in some extra reading, and thought he would chance asking her,

"Hey Rose, have you seen my Slytherin towel?"

"WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO ME!" she bellowed, her eyes furious.

Scorpius' eyes widened as he backed away from the she-dragon.

"W-what..?" he asked timidly, in a much higher vocal register than usual.

"You...you...you were my friend! We were...we were supposed to meet and...oh bollocks!" she cursed as she wiped tears from her face.

Suddenly...it all became clear to Scorpius...she was choosing now to discuss the past. The one discussion that Scorpius had been dreading since they had finally become friends had finally begun. Why it had to be now he did not understand but...

"Do...we have to do this now? We have class in 20 minutes..." said Scorpius, trying to avoid the imminent row of ultimate doom.

"YES. I–WANT– TO– TALK– ABOUT– IT– NOW!" she shrieked between sobs, walking towards Scorpius and poking him in the chest after every ear-splitting syllable "You know...you were my friend! *jab* You lied to me! *jab* Your father's name! *jab* The meeting...I never trusted another boy ever again...I could never make any friends...I didn't know why...it was YOU!"

"What and you don't think that I didn't suffer from it too? The meeting never happened because you couldn't look past my last name! I was in the entrance hall...your cousin told me everything! I could never forget those words... 'Rose does not want to know you. She wants nothing to do with your kind. In fact she hates you because you're a Slytherin. She knows about your stuffy, mean, pureblood, death eater family and she knows what your father did to her parents. She's not coming to see you, if that's what you're waiting for. So don't waste anymore precious moments you could be spending insulting muggle-borns in your dungeon.'" recited Scorpius from memory, looking away from Rose's face.

"W-what? That's not what happened...I showed up right on time and waited for a half an hour...and you didn't show. What are you talking about?" trilled Rose, voice continuing to be closer and closer to the stratosphere.

"I was early...your brother came and told me those things and...and...I left. I left before giving you a chance to tell me yourself and I'm sorry," said Scorpius as he gently tilted her chin upwards to look into the two pools of dark chocolate that were her eyes, "I'm so sorry that I hurt you." Rose's eyes narrowed until they were only slits.

"...I am going to KILL my cousin! Ooooo he's going to get it so bad...he'll wish that he was wearing his bottom as a bonnet when I'm finished with the bugger!" she yelled unexpectedly. At this, Scorpius burst into a gale of laughter that caused him to double over with mirth. Once he could regain his breath he looked up at Rose's red face and he continued to laugh some more.

"What is wrong with you? Do you realize that we were discussing how we ruined each other's adolescent lives...and you're just laughing? Are you bonkers?" asked Rose incredulously.

"Now THIS is the Rose that I want!" said Scorpius between remaining chuckles, clapping a hand to his knee, "Please let this be the end to 'Oh Mr. Malfoy will you pass me my textbook' bollocks!"

"What do you mean by that?" asked Rose angrily, but the edge was beginning to erase from her tone.

"What I mean," said Scorpius, poking her in the shoulder and moving so close to Rose now that he could count every eyelash, "is that this is what I missed *jab* This is what I love *jab* about you. The screaming, *jab* the yelling, *jab* the cursing *jab* in short...your unbridled...passion for...just about everything." sensing that it was safe, Scorpius put his hands on her shoulders and looked into her eyes once more.

"That's why...I love you so much...just the way you are..." he said fondly as he leaned in to her.

"Scorpius I...I..." said Rose, her breath tickling his face which was mere inches from hers now...her eyes sparkled with the tears that she shed but it only made her more beautiful...her lips were there...inviting him to take them...

BRRRRRRRRRRING

The Breakfast bell rang, causing both head students to jump apart as if electrified.

"I'm glad that we've had this talk," said Rose, finishing her sentence and extending her hand, "I'm glad that we can be friends again."

"As am I." said Scorpius seriously, taking her hand and shaking it, trying to hide a snort of laughter, "Here we are again with the bloody formality haha!"

"...Do you really actually still love Harriet L. Felixa novels?" asked Rose timidly.

"...ummm yes." said Scorpius, a flush creeping onto his alabaster face.

"Oh Scorpius, we're really going to be best mates!" she said embracing him chastedly, "But we should really get to class! What an example we're making! The head boy and girl late for breakfast...now really!" said Rose as if scandalized by her own behaviour.

As she hurried through the doors of her bedroom to grab her books, Scorpius smiled to himself. He was glad that everything was back to normal...well about as normal as things could be at Hogwarts.

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Rose hurried to her seat in the Great Hall, and was relieved to see that no food was present on the tables as of yet. Just as she sat down, Professor Dumas rose to his feet to make a speech.

"Good morning young magical students! How many of you would rather be eating than listening to me!" said the Professor animately, only a few students were brave enough to raise their hands, "No need to be shy! How many of you would rather be making snowmen than be in class!" at this several more hands were raised into the air.

"That's the spirit! In my native country of Canada...a day like day would have been declared a "snow day" and everyone wouldn't have class because it would be too hard to get to the school...good thing we all live in the building! Class schedule will resume as if it were any other day!"

"Seriously does he ever have a point to anything he says...?" whispered a 2nd year to Rose's right whom she promptly shushed.

"Now to the point of this interruption!" continued Dumas as if there were no angry whispers coming from the students, "this year, the Ministry of Magical Co-operation is pleased to announce a brand new exchange program being implemented between the schools of Durmstrang and Hogwarts!" with those words, the angry whispers changed to those of excitement...as if by magic or something...

"This year, 5 students in 7th year of Durmstrang will be staying until June, and for next year future 7th years can apply to study over there as well! Let me introduce to you, our five exchange students: Alexandru Balan, Cosmina Sabau, Dragos Valsan, Iolanda Albu, and Andrei Krum."

As Professor Dumas finished his list of names, five teenagers entered the Hall dressed in various furred cloaks. All of them were very striking looking, but all eyes went to the last boy at the end of the line.

He was powerfully built, with a distinctive hooked nose and curiously yellow-coloured hawklike eyes. As he walked past the Gryffindor table to the front of the room, he looked directly at Rose and her insides melted from the intense sensuality of his stare.

"I'm sure that Hogwarts will give them the greatest hospitality." spoke Dumas in conclusion.

"I'd like to give them more than that!" spoke a 5th year girl.

"Indeed...there seems to be a seat reserved for a Cosmina on the ALBUS!"

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Author's note: wow...talk about verbal diarrhea! I mean...I had writer's block for so long...and then in the past 12 hours I spewed out 8 pages...hope you liked the chapter...

Please let me know what you think!

Reviews with your comments and suggestions really helped me get out of my non-writing slum...thanks so much!

Tenchi

PS for you non french-speaking ppl...Dumas is pronounced Due-mah...not dumbass :P