A/N: So, I might have a bit of a soft spot for Thorki and even though it's not happening in this fic, I couldn't resist an oh so subtle reference.

Disclaimer: I might call my best friend my Loki, but still, Loki is Marvel stuff, not mine.

And then they were in the middle of a battle with Loki and Natasha's plan to kill Tony was thankfully forgotten.

It had been a long time since Loki had popped up and Tony had started to miss the crazy fucker. There were few bad guys who were as entertaining as Loki. Sure, Loki had managed to level half of the city. But at least he was an asshole after Tony's own heart.

Tony rolled to the side, easily dodging the blast of green fire. "Wow, you suck. Not so tough without your big stick, are you?"

Steve's laughter was loud enough to be heard without the comm. Oh, this was going to be good.

Loki's eyes flashed. "Insolence," he said. "I am a god. You should all be on your knees before me."

Steve howled.

"Even Thor?" Tony said, because he just couldn't resist.

"Especially Thor," Loki said. "My brother should learn to kneel before his betters."

Steve made tiny whimpering sounds and Clint's cackling came in loudly over the comm.

"You dare laugh at me?" Loki demanded. "Do you have a death wish?"

"Apologies, brother," Thor said. "Our Captain has been reading stories of a questionably sexual nature."

"And they make him laugh," Loki scoffed. "He must not be reading the right stories."

"That's what I said." Tony knew there was a reason Loki was his favorite villain.

"I could tell you a tale from our youth," Loki said in a low voice. "A story that will really get your blood boiling. And it's all true. Thor and I dared seven maidens-"

Thor's hammer connected solidly with Loki's chest and Loki went flying into the distance.

"Another time, brother," Thor called after him.

"Damn," Tony said. "That sounded like a good story."

Thor shook his head. "It is not as salacious as he would have you believe." He frowned. "If I recall, it ended up with one of the ladies falling into a mud puddle."

"Even better," Tony said. "Getting down and dirty."

"I am not that sort of man anymore." Thor eyed him critically. "And I do not believe you are either."

Tony shrugged. "Doesn't mean I don't like to hear about the exploits of my friends. Team bonding and all that. Right, Steve?"

Steve looked a little green. "I'd really rather not hear about everyone's sex lives."

"Except mine, of course," Tony said cheerfully. Yeah, he was hot stuff and Steve better know it.