Chapter 12: No More Tears
A/N: Quick recap because it has been ages since I have written . . . . Olivia and Fitz continue to bond and heal at Camp David. Olivia wants to name their baby after Fitz's mom. Mellie plays dirty and brings Karen home to "accidentally" let her overhead Fitz's plans to divorce her. Fitz and Olivia are packing to return to DC from Camp David.
Olivia waits with her packed bag in the living room for Fitz. It has been 15 minutes since he went upstairs to pack his belongings and the bedroom door has yet to open. She allows another five minutes to pass before she ventures up the stairs to see what could be keeping him.
She gently knocks on his door but receives no answer. She knocks harder and calls out to him, but still no response. Finally she opens the door. Fitz is standing at the window, his back to the door. She doesn't have to see his face to know that he has been crying. She walks over to him and wraps her arms around him, pressing herself against him.
"What do you need?" she gently inquires.
He takes a deep breath before he answers, "You. I need you. I have been standing here telling myself it is unfair of me to ask you to stay with me through this mess with Karen and Mellie, but I am afraid I won't be able to handle it if you are not there. I know we still have a lot to work through, but . . . ."
"Are you asking me to come to the White House with you? You want me by your side when you talk to Karen and Mellie?" she asks uneasily.
She releases him from her embrace and takes a couple of steps away from him. The thought of facing Mellie right now is more than she can handle. And what about Karen? She was friendly with the girl during the campaign, but she has not seen her more than once or twice since and never as her father's pregnant girlfriend. How will Karen react to her being there?
Fitz turns to face her and she is overcome by the fear she sees in his eyes. He is afraid that the progress they have made in their relationship will quickly be wiped away once they return to DC to deal with Mellie's shit.
"You don't have to come to the White House, just stay at Blair House. I just need to know that you are close by and that I can come see you without a lot of maneuvering. I don't want you and our baby around Mellie and her toxic attitude, but I need you close." He is fairly pleading with her.
Olivia is unsure about staying at Blair House, but she swallows her apprehension and agrees to it for Fitz. She would do practically anything for him. And truth be told, she had not been looking forward to being alone in her apartment, so far away for him.
Having settled the issue, Fitz and Olivia leave the peace and tranquility of Camp David and ride back to DC in silence, each is lost in their own thoughts of what will happen next.
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Fitz insists on escorting Olivia to Blair House and helping her get settled. Secret Service sets up an elaborate plan with his motorcade that will allow Fitz to ride to Blair House with Olivia. The press would have a field day to see the President arrive at Blair House instead of the White House, sparking all kinds of rumors that no one needs right now. Knowing that their time together is limited, Fitz and Olivia stand in the master bedroom of Blair House holding hands.
"Are you sure you don't want something to eat?" he asks as he pulls her close to him.
"I'm fine Fitz. Don't worry about me, I am going to take a shower and then a long nap. You just go take care of Karen. She needs you now."
He bends down and kisses her lightly on the lips, "I love you so much."
"I love you too. Now go take care of your daughter." She pushes him away lightly and he reluctantly heads towards the bedroom door.
"Fitz," she calls out, "keep your cool when you confront Mellie. She wants you to fly off the handle and you know she knows how to push your buttons."
He only nods in response and then he turns and walks out the door closing it softly behind him. He stands outside her door for a few moments allowing the love he feels for her in his heart to wash over him. It gives him the strength he needs to face Mellie. He walks away from her door, his stride determined.
"Sir, the motorcade is 45 minutes out. We need to leave in 10 minutes to meet them at the rendezvous point," Brian advises.
"Okay Brian. I just need to make a quick stop in the kitchen."
Exactly 10 minutes later, Fitz sits in the back of a SUV being whisked about to meet his Presidential motorcade.
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Entering the White House Residence, Fitz silently prays that he does not run into Mellie before he has a chance to speak with Karen. He is not sure he can control his actions if she were to cross his path right now. Fortunately, he makes it to Karen's room without spotting her mother. He knocks on the door before opening it.
"Karen," he calls out softly. "Are you in here sweetie?"
He looks around her room and it appears empty. He walks further into the room and closes the door behind him. He peeks into the adjoining bathroom, but she is not there. As he turns to leave, he hears something moving in the closet. He walks over and opens the door. Karen is sitting on the floor in the corner, her face red and blotchy, covered in tears.
Fitz's heart shatters into a million pieces. He scoops her up from the floor and carries her over to the bed. He sits with her and rocks her like he did when she was an infant. Karen's body remains stiff in his arms. He can tell she does not want to give into his comforting embrace, but he continues to hold her and rock her. Placing tender kisses on the top of her head. Karen finally relaxes her body and wraps her arms around Fitz, her chest heaving as she cries.
"Why don't you want us anymore Daddy," she sobs.
"Oh Karen, I will always want you and your brother. I don't know what you heard, but there is nothing that would make me not want you," he says as he tilts her head up so that she can see his eyes.
"Mom says that you want to throw us away so that you can be with Olivia. That you love her more than us. Is it true Daddy? Do you love her more than us? Are you going to leave us for her?" She searches his eyes for the answers to her questions.
He struggles to find the words that will ease Karen's mind. He removes her from his lap and sits her next to him on the bed. Taking her small hands in his and looking directly in her eyes he responds to her questions quietly.
"Karen, it is true that I love Olivia and that I want to be with her. But I am not leaving you or your brother. I don't love her more than you guys, just differently. She makes me happy in ways that I have not been in so long, if ever in my life. You are too young to understand all of this, but just know that no matter what, I will always love you and will always be there for you. No one will ever change that."
"Not even your new baby with Olivia?" she asks in a whisper.
It is all Fitz can do to contain his fury. Mellie was truly hitting below the belt.
"No Karen," he says gently, "the new baby will not change how I feel about you. Just like you being born didn't change the way I felt about Jerry. There is more than enough room in my heart to love all three of you."
"So are you going to marry Olivia?"
"I hope to one day," he responds honestly.
"That means you have to divorce mom. Don't you love her anymore?"
"Karen, it's complicated. I will always care for your mom because she gave me you and Jerry, but we haven't been what a husband and wife should be like for a long time now. I don't love her like a husband should love his wife and she doesn't love me. I can't pretend anymore that I do. So even if Olivia were not here and there was no new baby on the way, I would want a divorce anyway."
"But what about you being President. Won't the people get mad that you are getting divorced?"
"They might be mad and they may ask me to give up my job. And you know what, I will happily do it if it means that we: you, Jerry, Olivia, the new baby and me can be a happy family. That's more important to me than anything else."
"Mom won't like it. She loves being First Lady."
"I know, but she will have to get over that. Sometimes we can't have the things we want most in life."
"I'm scared Daddy," she confesses.
"Me too pumpkin," he replies. Karen looks at him with confusion. She never thought of her father being scared of anyone or anything.
"Why are you scared Daddy?"
"The decisions I make now will affect us all for the rest of your lives. I need to make the right ones and for the right reasons. I don't want to do anything that will make you unhappy or make you doubt my love for you and your brother. I don't want you to hate me."
"I could never hate you Daddy. It's just so confusing right now."
"I know, but just remember I am here for you. I am not going anywhere. Don't ever forget that. Whatever fears or questions you have come to me. Trust me when I tell you that this will be for the best. When it is all over, we will be a happy family."
"Promise?"
"I promise. Now how about you go wash your face and we can head down to the kitchen to see what ice cream we have. I am in the mood for a banana split."
"Okay. Two minutes." Karen bounces off the bed and heads towards her bathroom. She looks back over her shoulder at Fitz suddenly looking so much older than her fourteen years and says, "Daddy, I know you love me and wouldn't leave me. But it was nice to hear you say it," she beams her best smile at him.
As she disappears into the bathroom, Fitz lets the tears flow from his eyes. His baby girl isn't such a baby anymore. He is grateful that she can feel his love for her and still loves him too. He wipes his eyes and takes a couple of deep calming breaths. When Karen returns with a freshly scrubbed face and brushed hair, they walk hand in hand through the Residence to the kitchen. Their only thoughts are of banana splits with extra hot fudge.
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After Fitz's departure, Olivia wanders around the spacious master suite, taking in the history of the antique pieces that furnish the three rooms. She settles down in the living room to watch the early afternoon news cycles, but nothing of importance or interest is going on. She decides to keep her promise to Fitz and heads off to the bathroom to take a long hot shower.
She emerges from the bathroom 20 minutes later, wearing an ivory colored silk robe and chemise feeling clean and relaxed. She chuckles lightly as she walks toward the massive king size bed. The covers have been turned down and sitting on the nightstand, right next to her phone is a tray of fruit, cheese and crackers. A heavy linen light blue envelope with Fitz's distinctive handwriting graces her pillow.
She sits on the side of the bed, plops a grape in her mouth and opens the envelope, retrieving the notecard from inside.
My Sweet Livvie,
Just a little snack before your nap. Please eat, rest and relax. Don't forget you are taking care of some most precious cargo.
Your love and support mean more to me than I can ever tell you. I will see you tonight.
Until then, dream of me . . .
All My Love,
Fitz
She takes off her robe and gets into bed. She props her back up with pillows, pulls the tray to her lap and begins to nibble away at the snack while she goes through her emails on her phone. Within minutes, her stomach is full and her eyes are getting heavy. She puts the tray and her phone back on the nightstand, adjusts the pillows and snuggles under the covers for a much needed nap. She dreams of Fitz.
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Mellie stands outside the door leading to the kitchen, listening to Fitz and Karen laugh about some stupid video Karen found on YouTube. She knows that Fitz spent time with Karen in her room, but was not sure how the conversation went. Taking a deep breath, she enters the kitchen.
Fitz sees her first and his body tenses immediately. His ears turn bright red and his jaw tightens to a chiseled point. Karen was distracted by the huge glob of hot fudge that was stuck to her spoon and didn't notice her mother walk in, but she did feel the sudden change in her father's demeanor and looked at him with a puzzled expression.
"Daddy, what's wrong?" she questions quietly.
"Nothing sweetie. I just need to talk to your mom. How about you take your ice cream to your room and do your homework? I will come check on you in a little while."
Karen glances nervously between her parents. "I don't want to leave you Daddy."
Fitz shifts his gaze to Karen, "It's okay pumpkin. You go on."
"That's right Karen, you go on. Mommy and Daddy have to talk," Mellie says sweetly.
Karen doesn't respond to her mother. She squeezes Fitz's hand briefly and gives him a small smile. Scooping up her dish she leaves the kitchen.
The door is barely closed behind her before Mellie starts her tirade. "So, now that you are back from your lover's weekend, maybe we can get back to normal around here."
"Cut the shit Mellie," he says as he gets up from the table and walks to the sink to rinse out his dish. "I can't believe you would stoop so low as to bring Karen home from school to what, guilt me into staying with you? You want to use our children as pawns in your game to keep me President so that you can continue being First Lady? Well it won't work. I want a divorce."
"People in Hell want ice water, but they don't get it sweetie" she replies sarcastically. "I refuse to give you a divorce. I refuse to let Olivia take my place. You want to keep her as your mistress, fine. Have at it. But you will not humiliate me by divorcing me and casting me aside. I have worked too hard to get to this point and I won't let you or your blessed Olivia Pope rob me of my rightful place."
"That's all this is to you isn't it? Your place. Well guess what, you can't be First Lady if I am not President. I will resign today and you will have nothing."
"You wouldn't do that. Can you imagine the humiliation your children would feel? Their father disgracing the family name and resigning his place so that he can run off with his whore and bastard child!"
"Mellie, enough. You will not disrespect Olivia and my child that way. I spoke to Karen. She knows why I am doing this and she also knows that I will always love her and be there for her. I will speak with Jerry too when he gets back from his trip to Spain."
"Always coming to her defense. God, what does she have between those magical thighs that keeps you tied to her? You went ten months without even uttering her name and now suddenly you can't live without her? You are willing to give up the highest office in the land to what, be a stay at home dad to your mulatto baby? Where was this overwhelming care and concern when we had Karen and Jerry?"
"That was different and you know it," he responds gruffly. He turns his back to Mellie, unable to stomach looking at her face.
"How was it different? Hmmm honey, how was it different?" she asks.
"Because Karen and Jerry were not conceived out of love. You and Big Gerry decided when the proper time to have children was, I just went along with it to shut the two of you up. If it were up to me, I would have never had any children with you."
The sound of breaking dishware makes Fitz turn around. All he can see is Karen standing in the doorway, her face a twisted mass of hurt and anger. Before he can respond to her, she runs out of the kitchen and down the hall to her room. She slams the door so hard that retort sounds like a gunshot.
"You knew she was there, didn't you?" he hisses at Mellie.
"The girl has to learn the truth sometime. Better now and from your own lips. Somehow I don't think she is in your corner anymore. Gosh, she's probably going to be in therapy way into her thirties after hearing something like that. Maybe I should look into some places for her to go and talk about her feelings."
"I will see you dead before I let you send her away!" he roars. He quickly walks across the room and stands directly in front of her, his hands twitching to attach themselves to her throat.
"Careful Fitzgerald, anyone hearing you might take you seriously," she chuckles.
"Maybe I am," he says coldly and leaves the kitchen.
Mellie shudders in his wake. She has a fleeting thought that maybe, just maybe she has pushed him too far this time.
Fitz fairly runs down the hall the Karen's room. He knocks and calls out her name, but she doesn't answer. He tries the door and is surprised to find it unlocked. He enters and calls for her again. No response. He checks the closet and the bathroom, but she is not in either place. He quickly heads to his bedroom and uses the house phone to call security.
"Yes, Mr. President," the man on the line answers.
"I need to find my daughter immediately. Please have her brought to the Oval office as soon as she is located."
"Sir, Miss Karen requested her detail to take her back to school ten minutes ago. They should be in the garage as we speak."
"Please detain her transport. I am headed down there right now." Fitz hangs up the phone and runs from the room.
Several minutes later he arrives at the garage and finds Karen arguing with her security detail.
"I want to leave now! Let's go! Do I have to call a taxi to get the hell out of this place!" she screams.
"Karen Elizabeth! You calm down this instant," Fitz says sternly.
"I just want to go back to school. I don't want to be here anymore. Just let me go back to school," she pleads.
"Karen, let's just talk before you decide to leave. Okay?" Fitz reasons.
"Just answer one question," she says as she looks him directly in the eyes. He knows what she is going to ask before she says the words and he is not sure how to answer her. "Is it true?"
Fitz doesn't reply and for Karen that is answer enough.
"I want to go back to school now." She gets into the waiting SUV and slams the door. Fitz can only nod his approval to the agents and watches as her detail drives away. His shoulders slump like the weight of the world has been placed upon them. He turns and heads back to his office his heart seemingly broken beyond repair.
Mellie switches off the video feed from the garage. She had watched the entire interaction between Fitz and Karen and was more than pleased with the outcome.
"Now," she thinks to herself, "maybe he will stop this foolishness with Olivia. Surely his love and loyalty to his daughter outweighs his lust for Olivia and their bastard child."
With a self-satisfied smirk, she opens her calendar to see what she has on her agenda for tomorrow. The life of a First Lady is hectic.
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Olivia awakens to find the room in complete darkness. She fumbles in the dark to find her phone on the nightstand. Clicking it on she sees it is 9:45pm. She is amazed to discover that she has been asleep for more than five hours! A tendril of dread fills her heart when she notices that there are no missed calls or text messages from Fitz. She wonders how he and Karen are doing. She briefly considers calling him, but refrains. He needs this time to be with and comfort his daughter. She gets out of bed and heads to the bathroom to relieve her bladder and freshen up a bit, in expectation of Fitz's visit.
A few minutes later she is sitting on the couch in the living room, watching a Bette Davis movie on the classic movie channel, when there is a knock at the door. She quickly moves to the door and opens it. On the other side is one of the female members of the White House staff with a tray complete with light blue envelope.
"Good evening ma'am, I am Mary the evening maid. I have your dinner tray if you are hungry."
"Please come in," Olivia says. The situation feels awkward. What must this woman think about her being here, half-dressed, receiving trays of food with love notes written by the President?
"Thank you. Where would you like me to set it up?" Mary inquires.
"In the living room is fine."
With a polite nod, Mary sets up the dinner tray on the table in the living room. She disappears briefly into the bedroom to freshen up the bed and to remove the snack tray from earlier.
"If you need anything else, you can reach me at extension 312 on the house phone. I am on duty until 8:00am."
"Thank you Mary."
"You are very welcome ma'am. I will come back later to retrieve your dinner tray. Have a good evening," Mary says before closing the door softly behind her.
Olivia retreats to the couch and sits down, shame causing her cheeks to blush. She plucks the envelope off of the tray and opens it.
Sweet Livvie –
I am sorry I can't be there with you for dinner, but I hope to be with you soon. Please relax and don't overthink your stay at Blair House. I need you here with me. You are my rock. You are my life.
Eat all of your dinner like a good girl and I will bring you dessert.
All My Love,
Fitz
It never ceases to amaze her at how well Fitz knows her. With one brief note, he successfully soothes her even before she even needed it. She is grateful for his love and attention.
Removing the cloche from her tray, Olivia is greeting to the aroma of warm sliced rosemary roasted chicken breast with dried cranberries and sugared pecans on a bed of field greens with a balsamic vinaigrette dressing. The salad is paired with a warm, buttery yeast roll and a glass of decaf ginger lemon iced tea. Olivia digs into the salad with relish. Pregnancy has really increased her appetite. She enjoys her meal while watching Bette Davis try to figure out how to keep her man.
Halfway through the next classic movie, there is a light knock at the door. Hoping that it is Fitz, Olivia springs to the door. However, it is only Mary. She has come to remove the dinner tray. There is not another note from Fitz. Disappointment and uncertainty cloud her mind. Part of her hopes that Fitz's absence is just a result of Karen needing some one-on-one time with him. But part of her, a namely her gut, fears that his absence has more to do with Mellie than Karen.
For the second time that night, Olivia resists the urge to call or text Fitz. She has to learn to trust him to handle Mellie without her. She tries in vain to concentrate on the movie, but after a few minutes she gives up. She turns off the television and returns to bed. She turns out the light and lays there for a few minutes, convinced that after her long afternoon nap that sleep will elude her. However, before she even realizes it, she is drifting off to sleep.
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Fitz sits with his feet propped up on his desk. He swallows the last of the scotch in his glass, dropping his feet to the floor he gets up from his desk and makes a beeline for the decanter on the end table across the room. He has lost count on how many drinks he has had this evening. All he knows is that he wants to dull the pain of seeing the look in his baby girl's eyes. The alcohol only enflames the fury he has for Mellie. He can't believe Mellie did this to her own child. How could any parent deliberately shatter the world of their child for their own personal gain? Just thinking about it again makes his rage return. He stares at the empty decanter and his anger overtakes him. He hurls it across the room and it shatters into hundreds of glittering pieces on the floor. He needs to get out of here, he needs to get away from this office.
Joel, the SSA on evening duty, opens the door when he hears the crystal hit the wall. Catching the President's eye he asks, "Everything okay sir?"
"I need to go to Blair House, now!" Fitz barks out.
"Yes sir." Joel speaks into his cuff and leads Fitz out of the Oval office and through the White House to the tunnels leading to Blair House.
The usual 12 minute walk to Blair House takes 7 minutes. Fitz's strides are determined and precise. His detail has to practically jog to keep up with him.
When he enters the master suite at Blair House all is dark and quiet. He had hoped Olivia would be awake and waiting for him. He stands there in the darkness letting his eyes adjust to the dim room. He makes out the mini bar across the room and heads straight for it. Even in the dark room he manages to pour three fingers of scotch in his glass and down it like a shot.
He enters the bedroom and there is Olivia, snug and comfortable under the covers. Completely oblivious to the hell and torment that Fitz has gone through. He quickly undresses and slides into bed next to her. He needs her to take away his pain. To help dull the hurt that is in his heart. He begins to kiss her neck and rub his hands up and down her thighs roughly. He needs to feel her.
Olivia is awaken from her sleep to the feel of hands pulling her thighs apart. She opens her eyes to find a naked and obviously drunk Fitz kneeling over her, trying to pull her panties down.
"Fitz," she questions.
"Shhh Livvie, I just need you," he responds.
"Wait Fitz," she says trying to sit up. "What's going on?"
"I don't want to talk about it right now," he growls as he still tugs at her panties.
"Fitz, please stop trying to take of my underwear and talk to me."
He doesn't respond to her request and continues tugging on her panties until they finally rip. He forces her legs apart and prepares to enter her.
"Don't take your anger at Mellie out on me," she states flatly.
He stays himself, hovering over her and looks into her eyes. She is angry, and rightly so, but more than that she is hurt by his actions. He rolls off of her and mumbles an apology. He sits up on the side of the bed and puts his head in his hands.
After a few moments of silence, Olivia sits up and gets out of the bed. She slips the torn panties off and walks into the bathroom to dispose of them in the trash. Standing in the bathroom doorway, she peers at Fitz. He is still sitting on the side of the bed with his head in his hands. She crosses the room to him and stands before him. Gently she removes his hands from his face and cradles his head to her abdomen. Instantly, his hands grab her waist tightly and he holds onto her for dear life. His sobs are heart wrenching and his tears soak through the fabric of her nightgown, but she doesn't move. She stands there holding the man she loves, gently running her fingers through his hair and murmuring soothing sounds. She will stand there to until the end of time if he needs it.
His tears slowly come to an end. He releases his death grip on her waist and raises his eyes to meet hers. He eyes reveal his shame for his earlier actions, but her eyes only show him the love she feels for him. After she wipes the remaining tears from his face she holds his face in her palms.
She smiles at him and releases his face. She walks around to the other side of the bed and slips back under the covers.
"Come lay with me," she says to him.
He climbs under the covers and lays his head on her chest. "I'm sorry Livvie, I should have never tried to. . . .
"I know. Let's not think about it anymore. Just get some sleep."
"Okay," he sighs and closes his eyes.
"No more tears," she states firmly into the gloomy room a few moments later.
"What?"
"I don't know about you, but I have cried more in the last three days than I have in my entire life. Starting right this minute, there are no more tears. Whatever happened today between you, Mellie and Karen, we will talk about tomorrow and we will figure out what to do. But the time for tears are over. Okay?"
"Okay," he agrees meekly.
"Good. Get some sleep my love, tomorrow we fight for our family."
A/N: So I hope this chapter was worth the long wait. Thanks to all of you who sent PMs and Tweets to encourage me. It really helped.
So let me hear your thoughts on Mellie's tactics and Karen's reactions. Or just comment/suggest/rant as much as you want. It makes me happy!
I don't own Scandal, but if I did it would be all Olitz all the time!
