Pre-warning you, this chapter isn't that great. Mainly because I'm not 100% sure how to write these two in this situation but I am doing my best. If you guys can think of a way I can improve please just tell me. No offence will be taken. J

The day of the funeral arrived and the whole ED were focusing on celebrating Jeff's life and how he died a hero. The mood had lifted slightly, as much as it could right after a colleagues death but everyone knew this is He s

Ethan had managed to persuade the nurses to allow him to attend the funeral even though he still wasn't recovered and was in a lot of discomfort. Much to Cal's annoyance Ethan wasn't really giving anyone any choice in the matter, he would only discharge himself in the end.

Everyone had entered church, Ethan stayed at the back and sat in the first available seat knowing he couldn't make it any further. From where he sat he could see everyone. Tamzin at the front, crying. Ash, looking as guilty as Ethan felt. The Jamie, the young nurse who he didn't have the chance to get to know very well. He was sat beside Robyn sobbing his heart out. This made Ethan chock up slightly. Jeff had a family, he had a wife and kids. The kids.

He scanned the room until he spotted them, two children one about 16 the other about 13. Both sat staring at their father's coffin. What Ethan assumed was their mother was sat between then gripping their hands. Ethan knew what it was like to lose a parent, but to lose one at their age didn't bear thinking about.

Feeling a sharp pain across his chest Ethan noticed that his breathing had increased. He sat up straight to open his airway and place a hand over his sore ribs as he tried to control his breathing. The service had started a while ago but Ethan hadn't been listening he had been to focused on the people around him and the children.

As Charlie took to the stand Ethan begun to pay full attention.

"Jeff Collier was a brave man." Charlie started. "He died doing what he loved, that car crash was a scary time for all involved but Jeff never showed his fear, not when he had people to help. They were always his main priority."

Ethan had to consciously keep himself together now, it was all getting a bit too much. He could see Jeff's face. When he was trapped in that car Jeff helped him stay calm. If it wasn't for him he would be dead.

"All casualties from that accident are still with us today thanks to Jeff, and on behalf of everyone I'd like to thank him. For 8 years of service to Holby and to the countless lives he's saved." Charlie finished off.

Ethan was now feeling extremely uncomfortable, his chest was tight and the pain had increased to a point where he felt physically sick.

As the coffin was carried out of the church and people followed Ethan stood carefully, feeling he legs wobble he was glad when someone grabbed his arm.

"I wondered where you had got to…" It was Cal. "You don't look so good, I told you not to come."

"I had to say goodbye…" Ethan mumbled as he leant more into Cal unable to hold himself upright.

"Let's get you back to the hospital." Cal said keeping him steady.

Ethan shook his head. "No… not yet. Something I want to do first." He said straightening himself up slightly and walking out the church slowly aware Cal was very close behind him.

As their colleagues gathered around a fresh grave Ethan glanced to them before walking the other way down the grave yard. Cal sighed knowing where he was going. After a few yards Ethan stopped at a grave stone and put his hand on top of it leaning on it slightly, letting it take some of his weight.

Cal stood behind him. "She'd be proud of us, she'd be proud of you…"

Ethan shook his head. "I pretty much killed a man Cal. No one can be proud of that."

"Ethan for god sake. You did not kill Jeff." Cal sighed rolling his eyes.

"I did! If I had been concentrating more on the road! If I knew what I was doing! I could hardly drive the thing Cal! I should have pulled over!" he shouted before sinking down to the ground.

Being only a short distance away the crowd at Jeff's grave turned to see what was going on. Cal stood awkwardly not really knowing how to reacting to his crying brother on the ground while his colleagues looked at them.

He finally knelt down to Ethan. "Come on mate, everyone is looking…"

Ethan just shook his head hiding his face. Cal was relieved when he noticed Rita making her way over after reminding everyone that today was about Jeff and to concentrate on that. Reaching then Rita knelt down to Ethan and put her hand on his arm.

"Ethan, calm down. You're going to make yourself ill…" She spoke gently before looking at Cal. "This your mum's grave?"

Cal gave a slight nod. "Yeah. He thinks he killed Jeff."

Rita lifted Ethan's head. "We've had this conversation, you didn't kill Jeff. It was an accident."

"He… he had kids…" Ethan told her. "Teenagers… imagine your parent dying when you're that young."

"It's terrible but they will move on. Like we all will and will remember Jeff as a good man." Rita explained to him. "Now I think we should get you back to hospital don't you?"

"I'm bleeding…" Ethan admitted and moved his hand that had been around his stomach to show it was covered in bright red blood.

"Why didn't you say sooner!?" Cal snapped as he moved Ethan's arms and undid his shirt. "You've knocked the drain. We need to get it sorted before otherwise you'll be in big trouble."

Ethan groaned as his head lolled to one side.

"Rita, go get my car. Bring it round the front." Cal said passing her the keys. She nodded and swiftly got her feet and ran around to the carpark.

"Right… I'm sorry Ethan but I'm not letting you undo all my hard work." Cal said and lifted him up and carried him to the front of the church where Rita was just pulling in.

She got out and helped get Ethan into the back of the car. With a spare shirt Cal had found in the boot Rita sat in the back of the car with Ethan keeping pressure on the bleed and Cal raced to the hospital.