Oh how wonderful my life has become, that's sarcasm by the way. I would have never imagined being literally 'Stuck in a rut' with Snape. I wonder what Harry and Ron are up to now, that is if they are not dead, of course they're not. I try to reassure myself.
I haven't seen Snape today; Marvil tells me he's about though. I suppose he's down in the basement brewing up some form of liquid courage. I can tell he hates it when all his Death Eater buddies come around and mess the place up, he doesn't have the balls to stop them though. He just sits there and sulks in his corner sipping his drink and getting pissed.
Hmmmm. Now there's a thought.
I have a plan now; I know he won't kill me unless Voldie gives him the go-ahead which is unlikely seeing as I am the only one of Harry's Friends who he has captive at the moment. That leaves me free to drive him slowly into insanity, this I am going to enjoy.
He, he, he, he, he.
It's been 3 hours since I have devised my plan. Im going to put stage one into action as soon as I find Marvil.
My stages go like this;
Find Marvil
Try to befriend the elf
If that doesn't work lock him In a cupboard
Find Snape
Try to befriend Snape
If that doesn't work offer to do something nice for him
Do said nice thing
Hide
If hiding doesn't work find a Marvil's cupboard and hide with him.
I think that's about it minus some tiny details. I can smell Marvil now. That dish cloth he wears as a toga has defiantly seen better days. Urgh!
"Oi Marvil" I screech.
He growls at me
"Marvil I just want to talk" I bat my eyelashes at him but I don't think it has the right effect.
He spits at my feet
"Now Marvil, that's not nice, is it" I say teasingly.
Another growl. Jeeze this little elf is impossible.
I'm running after him down the corridors now, I take a moment to appreciate how nice it feels to have the wind in my hair before I fall flat on my faceā¦at Snape's feet.
Crap
"Master missy mudblood be chasing Marvil, Marvil be scared" the ruddy elf whimpered.
Snape is glowering down at me.
"Is this true?" he growls.
"No" I huff, "I just wanted to talk to him" I offer whilst rubbing my sore cheek.
"And what did you want to talk about?" His voice laced with amusement.
"Well I was offering to tell him the benefits of S.P.E.W" I astound myself at how fast I can think.
The smile vanishes from Snape's face now. "Miss Granger, please do not try and free my house elf, then who would I have to clean my house?"
Oh this is just too good I couldn't have planed it better. Yes. Yes. Yes.
"Actually" he eyes me up casually "you would be able to do that I suppose, tell me Miss Granger are you familiar with a mop and bucket?" he says matter-of-factly.
Oh this is perfect, "I suppose" I reply all sweetly.
"Good then you can assist Marvil in mopping my floors" he smiles thinking this is a good enough punishment. "And be careful if they are not spotless I will have you do them again until they are".
I smile and give him a little curtsey, then flick my hair and follow Marvil. Oh this is going to be so good.
