So, I've been pretty depressed lately, and that's been throwing me off from writing. I feel really bad about that, so I hope you guys like this chapter. Leave a review telling me what you think.
Until next time,
Sky
"Chapter 6 – Falling"
"Why am I feeling so guilty? Why am I holding my breath? Worry 'bout everyone but me, I just keep losing myself." – The Civil Wars
"To put it simply, your son has lost part of his ability to hear, and, in time, may lose his hearing altogether."
She had trouble sleeping that Thursday night. Sure, she'd gotten past the biggest issue in her life at the moment, but now she had two other problems to worry about: her son, and the ignoramus in her Roman Archeology class that wanted to be her new suitor despite the massive STOP sign on her finger.
As much of a nuisance as Fletch was making himself out to be, he wasn't a big problem for her. Worst case scenario: she'd kill him violently before class started and spend a few years in jail. It seemed like a risk she was willing to take, but she didn't give him that much thought as she tossed and turned in a bed far too big for her.
She contemplated bringing the twins into her room and putting them in the bed with her, but she didn't want to risk one of them falling off. Moving the furniture around in her bedroom would be far too much work, and she needed to just suck it up.
Beck would be back in a few hours. And while she rarely ever apologized to anyone, she would let him come back home. She wouldn't admit it to him, but she'd overreacted when she threw him out. But in her defense, she was under a lot of stress from sleeplessness, repressed trauma, blah, blah, blah, and she would take it to her grave.
She made a mistake. So what? No one was perfect. Sure, Beck was pretty damn close, but he certainly wasn't perfect. If anything, he could take her letting him back into her house as a sign of an apology. Even if the house was in his name, it was hers. She didn't have anywhere else to go, unlike him, and he would never make her sleep on the streets. So if he didn't accept her apology, it would be another story and he would find his pretty little ass back in his old RV.
But back to her son.
She needed to take Jensen to the hospital to get him checked out. That old hag at the daycare said something about his hearing, and now she was worried beyond belief. She wasn't religious, but she was praying that there was nothing wrong with him. She was stupid to think her kids would be okay despite her difficult pregnancy. She'd fallen, been thrown around, been beaten, and even gone into early labor. If that wasn't reason enough for abnormalities, she didn't know what would be.
And if there was something wrong with Jensen, what if there was something wrong with Darla? One kid was bad, but complications for two? That would kill her. What would happen when she took him? What if something was wrong and it was her fault? Regardless of what anyone tried to tell her otherwise, she let Liam do everything he did to her. She didn't tell her stepdad—should she even call him that?—when Liam first hit her. She didn't tell the cops when he first molested her. She didn't tell Beck the first time he raped her. She didn't do much to fight him back even before she found out she was pregnant. She took forever to tell anyone anything. And because she waited so long to tell anyone what was happening, Robbie ended up in a coma. Who was to say something didn't happen to her babies in utero?
So when she woke up that Friday—though she doubted she could say that she actually slept—she reached for her phone. She needed to call him, to talk to him. She needed to tell him about Jensen, to find out what time he'd be home in the hopes that he'd go to the hospital with her. She didn't know what he'd be doing, but she was going to call him anyway.
For once, after pressing the appropriate speed dial number, she was glad they had a phone plan that covered international calls. She held her breath and clenched her eyes shut as she waited for it to start ringing.
One ring…
Two rings…
Three rings…
Ugh. She felt stupid and like she was about to cry. She needed to get out of bed and get her coffee, but she hoped he would pick up. On the fifth ring, his voicemail sounded. She hesitated for a brief moment to make sure that her voice wouldn't crack—she hated when her voice cracked.
"I…I'm taking Jensen to the hospital for a checkup when I get out of class," she spoke. "It's probably nothing, but it would be good for his dad to be there with him, too. Get there soon enough and you can come back home. Bye."
After hanging up, she sighed. That was good; she was strong, despite her weak emotions. Even if she didn't feel like Jade West, she would be Jade West. She'd be damned if she let anyone see otherwise.
Slowly, she climbed out of bed and stood up. She couldn't start what was definitely going to be a long day if she couldn't even get out of bed.
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning.
It almost killed her to drop her twins off at daycare. She was just glad that Cat wasn't in the car with her; the little redhead decided to stay with her mom the previous night, so she would just hitch a ride to school. By the time Jade got to the nursery, Cassie was already there playing with a little blond boy, so Cat was already in class.
Oh well.
Again, she suffered through her Chemistry class, marveling at how the professor hadn't kicked out all of the idiots who kept asking questions about his syllabus and dreadfully mundane personal life. And while she suffered, she fell asleep at least twice during the fifty minute period. If the teacher hadn't have tapped her on the shoulder when the class was over, she would have slept through her Roman Archeology class.
Resisting the urge to strangle her grey-haired professor for bothering her, she gathered her things and quickly made her way to the Education building. She still thought it was stupid that the entire campus was for education but there was a specifically labeled building.
As she checked her phone, she saw that she still had four minutes before class started.
When she opened the doors to her classroom after pushing past the throngs of people making their way to their own classrooms, she saw that the room had filled up fast. She looked to her usual spot and a hard grimace set in when she saw the back of Fletch's dirty blond head sitting in the chair beside hers.
The door closed loudly behind her and four people in the back row—including the stupid, handsome, rich boy—turned to look at her. He gave her a smirk and a wink, eliciting a scoff and roll of the eyes from her. He waved her over, but she ignored him and took the stairs down to the front of the classroom.
Moments after she took a spot in the front row where no one else sat, she felt the warmth of someone leaning into her. "I saved you a seat for a reason," Fletch whispered into her ear.
Jade clenched her eyes shut, suppressing a growl. "I'm sitting up front today," she spat. "And I told you Wednesday to leave me alone."
"Maybe I decided I want to sit up front as well," he offered coolly. "It's merely a coincidence that the only other open seat in this row is directly behind you."
She opened her mouth to say something else when the professor walked in, blathering on about the lesson plan for the day. She contemplated moving, but her every move would be scrutinized by both the teacher and the creep behind her, so she decided to keep her spot. But while Fletch had won this round, she would have the last laugh.
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning.
When she went to pick up her kids, Jade noticed that Cassie was nowhere in sight. She partly hoped Cat would be here because she needed her best friend, but if the dumb broad wanted to be with her mother, or even that stupid bitch Natalie who didn't give a damn about her other than sex, then oh well. If Cat wanted to make the same mistakes over and over again, then that was her decision.
She meant to go straight to the hospital as soon as she got her kids settled in the backseat.
Maybe it was her ever increasing anxiety that made her lose control. She didn't know why she did it, but she found herself in front of her old home in a matter of minutes—the opposite direction of the hospital.
Slowly, she pulled into the driveway and crossed her arms atop the steering wheel, resting her chin on her arms as she gazed at the dilapidated house.
A big, white foreclosure sign hung on the paint-peeled door. Part of the wood had been cracked from where it had been kicked in God knows how many times. The hinges were loose, and the door would probably fall with the slightest touch. The white paint on the house was chipped and molded over in some places, making the house look like it had green chicken pox. Some of the boards of the front wall were missing, leaving gaping black holes with vines growing out of them in their wakes. From what she could see of the roof, there were holes up there too.
The house was never nice looking, but two empty years had truly taken a toll on the hellish building.
Sighing deeply, she looked up into the rearview mirror at her napping twins. Flashbacks of her old life flashed before her: running across the lawn with Liam and their mother as they chased bubbles on a summer's day; her mother's smiling face greeting her every day after school; having to practically drag her 'father' across the front porch when he drank his sorrows right after his wife died; the numerous times where Liam had yanked her by the arm across the driveway before thrown her into the house, regardless of her screaming protests…
Her hand creeping through the air, she opened her car door and got out. She moved to the backseat to take her children out as well. She wanted to go outside, and there was no way in hell she'd leave them alone for a second.
Slowly, baby carriers in hands, she made her way to the front door and eased it open with her knee. Images of her family sitting on the couch while watching TV almost made her smile. But then she saw the torn and tattered furniture for what it was. Several of Liam's sexual assaults played out before her in the living room, as well as the last encounter she ever had with Liam West, Sr.
There were still a few blood stains on the dingy white-washed carpet.
Her stomach cringed as she saw the pink-tinted spot near the door where her water had broken. She looked down at her sleeping twins and clenched her eyes shut. It had been a nightmare, but she would never give up her babies.
The stairs creaked under her feet as she made her way up to her old room. Her door was still closed like she left it, and she wondered if her dresser was still blocking the other side of it. She tried to push her door open, but it wouldn't budge, confirming her inquiry.
Though she didn't want to, she went in Liam's room. She gasped at how untouched the room was. Posters of pinup girls and men in military uniforms hung on the walls. Hair products, combs, scraps of paper, and even a few neck chains were scattered all over his dresser to where she couldn't see the wood of the large object. His bed was still messy and unmade from where she'd collapsed on it, and it looked like someone still lived here.
She turned toward the large hole in the wall that he made the night he went to jail for the first time. The hole had long since been boarded up, and the sledge hammer he had used was nowhere in sight. The boards were sloppily placed, so she figured she could kick them out of place if she tried hard enough.
Gently, she placed the baby carriers on the ground so to not wake the twins, even though they'd more than likely be woken up soon enough. Placing her hand on the crumbling part of the original wall, she lifted her foot and put as much force as possible into the kick. At first, the board she targeted didn't budge, but she continued to kick at it with all of her energy. Darla started to cry, but her mother ignored her for the moment being.
Around the fourth kick, the board broke in half and Jade was able to push it out of the way. She did the same for the board beneath it until it too fell out. Ducking down and crawling through the small opening she made, she stood up and marveled at her room.
It was just the way she left it: the walls black with her red ceiling, her small collection of clothes strewn over the floor, her closet door still missing, and Liam's sledgehammer lodged into the far wall.
She crouched back through the opening she made and managed to maneuver the baby carriers through it—but not before waking up her son. Once the babies were in her room, she took them out of the carriers and held them close, bouncing them slightly and humming the song her mother used to sing to her. She let out a sigh of relief when they calmed down and kissed them both on the tops of their heads.
Dragging her feet along the beige carpeting, she reached out to the convoluted, tattered sheets on her bed, her fingers just barely grazing the fabric. Closing her eyes, she crawled onto her bed with her toddlers. Putting Darla down on the bed, she grabbed the cover and pulled it over all three of them, curling into a ball and holding her arm protectively around her babies as they snuggled closer to her.
She felt pathetic, like nothing more than a cliché. She would expect this kind of situation from Tori—and the slightest chance from Cat—but she never thought it would happen to her. She was Jade freakin' West. This was never supposed to happen.
But it had to happen to everyone, right?
She was beginning to hate herself for falling into this harlequin game, and she hated herself a little more for having a difficult time trying to get out. She almost hated herself for bringing her children back to this God-awful place, but they wouldn't even remember it, so that put her a little at ease.
She didn't know how long she laid there, wallowing in her own self-pity, but it made her feel slightly better when she crawled out of bed. She must have fallen asleep, but her head had cleared and she'd finally reached a conclusion. She knew she would be able to live with the consequences.
Darla and Jensen cooed quietly on the bed, crawling around beneath the covers, and Jade found it in herself to smile at them. Her twins didn't have a care in the world. They were fine with each other, even if that was all they would ever have. But they would have more. She would give them whatever she could so they would always be happy. And seeing them so blissfully unaware of the nightmare surrounding them, their mother knew that they would be okay, regardless of any complications that may have arisen from her difficult pregnancy.
She scooped up her twins and held them tightly against her chest, letting all of her fears melt away.
She would be able to stand strong through whatever was going to happen.
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning.
Leaving her childhood home, this was the first time Jade had noticed her brother's car missing from the driveway. She almost hoped it would have been there so she could have taken a baseball bat to it or sold the metallic beast. But good riddance to that hunk of scrap metal.
And as she stood in the doorway with her baby carriers at her sides, a hot pink Volkswagen pulled up beside her car. The door flew open once the car was in park and a petite brunette with large sunglasses blocking her eyes jumped out of the car.
"Yoo-hoo!" she called in a loud, obnoxious voice, waving her hand ridiculously to call for attention she already had. Her voice reminded the Goth of nails on a chalkboard, causing her to wince at each word. "You wouldn't by any chance happen to know a Liam West, would you?" As she bounced up to the West girl during her question, her southern accent was begrudgingly present. If she kept up, Jade would probably kill her. She smiled broadly, flexing her fingers in a small wave to Darla and Jensen. "What precious little angels!"
In spite of the annoying girl before her, Jade laughed scornfully and moved her children behind her back. "I'd rather not," she quipped. "Who the hell are you?"
"The name's Christiane Holland Ford," she announced with a warm, Southern welcome and an outstretched hand, despite Jade's unpleasant company and the obvious fact that her hands were full. She lowered her hand with a slight frown when Jade refused to return the gesture. "Do you know where he is? I've been bending over backwards to find that boy."
The taller girl rolled her eyes and leaned against the doorframe, being careful of Jensen's carrier. "You might have to wait a week or two to find him," she announced, "He's in jail and up for parole. There's always a chance he might not get it, though."
Christiane scowled, nearly mimicking Jade's signature look. "And just who are you?" she asked in her thick accent. "Are you his ex-girlfriend?"
Jade laughed loudly, possibly harder than she's ever laughed before. She laughed so hard that she almost fell backward back into her old house and almost dropped her kids. Darla laughed with her. "I'd rather die than ever be his girlfriend," she spat once she'd regained her composure. "If you're lucky, they might let you on his visitor's list. The jail is about thirty miles from here unless you're too dumb to follow signs since you're clearly dumb enough to think I'd date my own brother. Or is that common where you're from?" She walked past the little brunette to her car and ripped the door open after setting Jensen's carrier on the ground. "I've got more important places to be."
Christiane crossed her arms with a deep-rooted grimace as she watched her new nemesis situate the precious angels and get in her dinky car before driving off. This Southern Belle hated people like Jade more than anything in the world. She felt disrespected, and she was damn sure that she would get back at the ill-mannered grunch.
She would have the last laugh.
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning.
She should have called Beck again.
She should have waited until he could be there with her to take her son to the hospital. She didn't beg, but she needed him with her. She needed him to hold her hand, to kiss her temple and whisper in her ear that everything was going to be okay. She desperately clung to the terrible feeling that everything wasn't going to be okay, so she needed him to lean on.
Every newfound strength she gathered when she held her twins in her arms in her old home vanished the second she set foot into the hospital.
She didn't know how to deal with Miss Haggerty's words. What if her son really couldn't hear? What if he had somehow managed to get an ear infection and she hadn't noticed? She would die before she let anyone say that she didn't love or neglected her children, but she knew that she hadn't given them as much attention as she should have lately; with her brother always terrorizing the back of her mind and refusing to let her sleep—on top of trying to etch out some time for her fiancé—Jade realized that she could have missed something in her son.
But if he had an ear infection, he'd cry, right? She'd never had one before, but she assumed they were painful. Cat never noticed anything either…
But what if she had?
Cat had been looking after the twins a lot lately, and what if she noticed something wrong with Jensen? She was known for forgetting things, and maybe that's what happened. If anything was wrong with Jade's son, it was that little bi—!
Stop, Jade scolded herself. You have no right to blame Cat; you left him with her so you're to blame.
But she couldn't help it. She needed someone to blame for this, something to make her feel better. Blaming herself would only make her feel worse.
She took them to see Dr. Feldman—the doctor with thinning grey hair, tired facial features, and crackling voice who alerted the police of her situation two years ago—in the hopes that he would be able to figure out what was wrong with her son. He was just about the only doctor she would trust with her kids.
After a thirty minute wait, the doctor came into the room where Jade sat with her twins and smiled at her. "Good afternoon, Miss West," he greeted with his cracking smile. "It's been a while."
She crossed her arms and bounced her knee repeatedly. "There's something wrong with my son," she announced, skipping the formalities and getting straight to the point.
The doctor pulled out the rolling chair from the desk beside the examination table and sat in front of the mother and her children. "What seems to be the problem?"
"He's having hearing issues," she answered. "I want to get his ears checked to make sure he doesn't have an infection."
"Alright," the older man noted. "I'll just need to run a few small tests, including a little blood work, and we'll make sure Jensen is just fine." He smiled at the little boy picking at his sister's clothes on the floor, his chubby legs exposed by his sister's fluffy black dress.
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning.
Beck was jetlagged, but that didn't stop him from hopping into his truck as soon as he got back to his parents' house. He had gotten very little sleep the night before and felt weird trying to sleep on the plane, but now he was completely awake with anticipation. He even fought back jitters as his fingers drummed on the steering wheel.
He was ready to see his son and daughter, especially his fiancée.
The weekend had been a long one, specifically because of the fight he'd gotten into with Jade, but she greeted him with an apologetic-for-Jade voicemail. He was ready to pick her up, kiss her until his lips turned blue, and even get down on his knees if he had to. He would never let her doubt ever again his love for her. Saying that he missed her was an understatement, and he forced himself not to go over the speed limit.
When he pulled down the dirt path to the home he'd bought with his and his parents' money, he smiled.
Just a few more steps and Jade would be in his arms again.
As soon as he unbuckled his seatbelt, his phone rang in his pocket, playing an 8-bit rendition of one of his favorite Michael Jackson songs. When he pulled out his cell, he smiled at the picture of him kissing Jade that he set as her contact icon. She probably heard him coming down the driveway.
"I'm about to walk in the door," he told her lovingly as he answered the phone.
"I need you to come to the hospital," she pleaded quietly between sobs.
Beck's smile fell and he shot up straight in his seat. Crap, he'd been so excited about seeing her that he forgot about the hospital. "What's wrong?" he asked, slight fear in his voice. "Is Jen okay?"
"Just hurry up and get here, Beck," she whispered, sadness weighing down her voice. "I'm in room 110."
She hung up without telling him that she loved him, and his chest contracted slightly. His breathing faltered, burdened by worry. Thousands of horrible scenarios raced through his mind, all involving near-death experiences. What if something else had happened and it wasn't about Jensen at all?
He forced himself to take a deep breath. Calm down, he told himself, Think about this. It's something serious, but no one's dead. No one's dead. No one's hurt.
With a shaking hand, he called Cat. It was selfish of him, but he hoped that whatever was going on had happened to her instead of his family. He didn't wish anything bad on her, don't get him wrong, but he would probably lose his mind if something had happened to Jade or the twins.
It seemed like it took forever for her to answer the phone, so he started pulling out of his driveway while the phone continued to ring. And just as he was about to hang up when he was back on the main road, the sound of laughter filled his ear.
"Hi, Beck!" Cat exclaimed happily. "Are you home yet?"
"I'm on my way to the hospital," he stated, not mimicking her happiness.
She gasped on the other end. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," he said. "You're not with Jade?"
"No," she answered. "I'm at Natalie's house. What's going on?"
"I'm about to find out," he assured her as he sped down the road, going ten miles over the speed limit. "Just keep hanging out with your friend. I'll call you when I find out."
"Kay, kay," the little redhead acknowledged glumly. "Talk to you later."
Beck hung up his phone and dropped it into the passenger's seat, putting both hands on the wheel and trying not to break into a panic attack.
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning.
Before he knew it, Beck was running through the hospital, trying to get to Room 110. Orderlies, nurses, and even a janitor called out to him, telling him to slow down, but he didn't listen to them.
He had to get to Jade.
When he burst through the door where his fiancée told him to go, he saw her sitting in a little blue chair, hunched and crying over Jensen while Darla played with a noise making baby book.
Jade looked up at him with tear and mascara-stained eyes and stood up, clinging to Jensen while he looked around absentmindedly.
"What's wrong?" Beck questioned in a hushed whisper. "Is anyone hurt?"
Jade shook her head solemnly.
From behind, Dr. Feldman placed a hand on Beck's shoulder. "Maybe you should have a seat, Mr. Oliver," he announced as the young father looked over his shoulder with an anxious gaze. He ushered him into the small examination room and the young couple sat together, Jade pressing herself close to her fiancé as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and bounced his knee impatiently.
The grey-haired doctor sat in the leather rolling chair directly across from them. "Miss West brought your son in for hearing problems," he announced.
Beck looked to Jade who refused to meet his eyes.
"When I checked both of his ears," Dr. Feldman continued, "I wasn't able to find a problem. But I did some blood work and we were able to get a neural scan of Jensen's head. There were damaged nerves just above both ears, but the blood work alerted us to the damages being caused by X-linked Congenial Hearing Loss."
"What does that mean?" the Oliver boy asked nervously. "Can you fix it?"
Dr. Feldman pursed his lips. "To put it simply," he started, "Your son has lost part of his ability to hear due to genetics and, in time, may lose his hearing altogether." He ruffled through the stack of papers he held in his hand. He pulled out a yellow sheet of paper and handed it to the younger man. "This is a more detailed look at what X-linked Congenial Hearing Loss is, as well as how to help a child living with the disorder. The disorder is usually passed down from the mother, whether or not she has a history of deafness in her family."
Jade shuddered against him, another gut-wrenching sob escaping her lips. He rubbed her arm in a weak attempt to soothe her.
"Signs of the disorder tend to emerge before six months of age," Dr. Feldman stated. "When the disorder is caught before six months, the child is able to learn communication skills, verbal and non-verbal, just as well as a hearing peer." He held up his hand when he noticed the distraught look on Beck's face. "The Individuals with Disabilities Education Act allows your child to receive interdisciplinary assessment as well as early intervention services at no substantial fee; considering your socioeconomic dispositions, this aid should be free or roughly around one hundred dollars. After age three, your son will be given all of those benefits for free through the public school system."
"But is there any way we could fix his hearing?" the young father asked, grinding his teeth after the question.
"There are a number of options," the doctor answered with a small smile. "At this point in your son's life, you can opt to have him simply have a hearing aid, similar to one that a person who loses their hearing later on in life would receive. You also have the option of giving your son a Cochlear Implant through surgery, which won't be costly in your case. Considering the degree of your son's condition, a CI would be the best route. And it would be good to go ahead and decide within the next month what way you would want to communicate with your son."
"Will we be able to teach him sign language?" Jade asked meekly, wiping blackened tears from her eye with a sniffle.
Dr. Feldman nodded. "If you wish," he commented, "You can teach your son—and even your daughter—sign language, which could possibly take the pressure of communication off your son. You can still teach him to verbally speak, which would be advised if you choose to do the surgery. I can recommend you to a speech-language pathologist who will be able to work closely with both of you to teach your son to speak as well as a normal hearing person. Speech-language pathologists are rather pricy, regardless of socioeconomic status, and it is one-hundred percent possible to teach your son to speak and sign as well as a normal hearing child."
Beck looked to Jade who looked down at Jensen, stroking his hair slightly. Neither of them wanted this for their child, but there was hope for him. He had no doubt that he wanted to get the implant for his son if it meant he could be closer to living a normal life, but it would ultimately be Jade's decision.
"How soon can we get the surgery?" she asked quietly, keeping her eyes on her son as he sucked his fingers. A small tear fell on his head, but he didn't seem to notice.
"I can schedule the surgery as soon as possible today," he assured her. "It will only take a few hours, but we'll need your son to stay overnight to monitor his recovery. He may have to stay for more than one night, however, but he'll receive the best care."
Jade sniffled again and rubbed her eyes. "We'll do it."
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning.
Only Jade was allowed in the surgery room, and that was because the surgeons were scared of her and Dr. Feldman greatly sympathized with her. Beck was told to stay in the waiting room while Jensen's operation commenced, much to his dismay.
At first, he began to pace back at forth with anticipation, but the receptionists and nurses used this as their chance to flirt with him, so he had to force himself to stay seated. As he waited for what seemed like an eternity, he perked up when he saw Caroline Harris enter the hospital.
"Mrs. Harris?" he called, standing up.
Caroline turned around at the sound of her name and smiled weakly when she saw her son's best friend. Her eyes were tired and bloodshot, like she'd been crying for hours. Her makeup was completely intact considering the time of day, as if she'd fixed it up or just applied more of it. Her short, dark hair, which always seemed to be in immaculate form, had strands flying left and right from the tiny bun at the nape of her neck. Her clothes were slightly disheveled, which shocked him most.
"Is everything okay?" he asked, walking up to her.
"It will be," she breathed. "Andre just isn't himself right now."
"What happened?" he questioned, his voice filling with fear for the second time that day.
Andre's mother frowned. "I found him last night after I got off work and he wouldn't wake up when I tried to get him to come to dinner," she explained. She pressed her lips tightly together for a moment, suppressing a sob. "I…had to bring him here last night and they said he'd tried to…" The hidden sob in her throat exploded inside of her and she covered her mouth to stifle it, cutting herself off.
"Andre wouldn't do that," Beck denied, realizing what she was telling him.
"I just don't know anymore," she whispered. "I haven't seen him in so long and he's been so distant lately. I think it may have to do with the girl he was seeing—I can't think of her name—because I had to call her to tell her she was allowed to visit, but she wouldn't pick up the phone. I'm worried that they might have broken up and he took it pretty hard; she means the world to him."
"I'll see if I can call Tori," he told her. "I'll…find out what's going on. Just tell Andre I hope he's okay."
Mrs. Harris smiled weakly. "Andre needs more friends like you," she told him before walking away. Once she was out of sight, Beck pulled his phone from his pocket and dialed Tori.
One ring…
Two rings…
Three rings…
"Hello?" Tori called in a hushed whisper.
"Tori," he called in a normal tone. "Where are you? Andre's mom's been trying to call you. What are you doing?"
"No she hasn't," she denied, keeping her voice low. "Andre called me five times today, but I don't want to talk to him. We're…spending some time apart." In the background, Beck heard a soft, man's groan, followed by—presumably—Tori shushing the guy.
He pursed his lips and narrowed his eyes. "How long have you two been broken up?" he questioned pointedly.
"Since Tuesday," she responded meekly.
He sneered slightly, gripping his knee out of anger. "Andre's here at the hospital," he spat. "His mom thinks he tried to kill himself."
"What?" she cried in disbelief. "What hap—?"
He hung up before she could finish her question, unwilling to listen to her false worry. He knew there was no way that she could possibly care about him, especially with that mystery man in the background. If she loved Andre, she wouldn't have rebounded so quickly, especially not the day after she kicked her boyfriend of nearly two years out of her home. How did she even find the time to find a new guy? It had to be someone she already knew, right?
All Tori did was hurt him. And now she was pretending to care?
She was pathetic.
Dr. Feldman rounded the corner and Beck stood up, putting Tori and Andre to the side for a moment. "Is everything okay?" he questioned anxiously.
The doctor nodded with a wide smile. "The surgery went well and we've done the frequency tuning already. He loves his mother's voice." He nodded his head to the door he came out of. "This way, please."
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning.
Earlier.
Jade paced in the hospital room where her son would be staying the night. Darla would be staying with her father for the night, but she crawled around the hospital room for the time being, picking at anything she could grab.
She was allowed in the operating room with her daughter, but after some deliberation, she wasn't sure she'd want to be there. Seeing her son, so vulnerable and small, broke her in ways she never imagined possible; she knew she wouldn't be able to keep her composure while they tried their best to cure her son, and that was why she didn't choose to be there for the surgery.
After a while, she lost track of time.
By the time a rut started to form in the floor and Darla had curled up into a ball for a nap, Dr. Feldman entered the room with a nurse carrying Jensen as he screamed and cried his lungs out. Jade shot a pointed look to the nurse and quickly took her son from her, fighting the urge to attack the young woman.
"Jade," Dr. Feldman began over Jensen's wailing, "The surgery went well, but we need to adjust the frequency of his implant to make sure the surgery was a success."
"So why didn't you do it already?" the angry mother spat, bouncing her son gently.
"We felt it would be best to have you in the room," the doctor explained, unfazed by her hostility. "Jensen is more likely to respond to his mother's voice than mine or a nurse's; it's highly likely that he's heard your voice before and is already attuned to it, so it's best to do the tuning with you speaking to him."
"What do I do?" Jade asked in a calmer tone.
Another nurse came in, wheeling in large machine full of technology she had never seen before. "We'll need you to sit down on the bed," he instructed. "Talk to your son in a normal tone of voice and try to soothe him." He picked up a wire connected to a small metal device and placed it above Jensen's black implant placed directly behind his ear. "I'll keep adjusting the frequency of his device until he responds to you."
Reluctantly, she moved over to the bed and sat down with her son, being careful not to bounce him too hard as she sat down.
The old man stood over by the large machinery and turned it on. "Try talking to him," he advised.
She skeptically opened her mouth, trying to think of something to say. She wasn't used to her son crying, nor was she used to trying to soothe him in front of other people. "It's…okay," she said slowly and somewhat awkwardly. "You'll…be fine."
Jensen continued to cry and Dr. Feldman pursed his lips as he turned a dial on the machine.
"Please stop crying," Jade begged quietly. "I know it hurts, but you'll be okay."
Her son still cried and his mother began to worry. What if this didn't work? What if he would never hear her again?
"Try again," the doctor ordered as he turned up the dial. "Don't worry, Jade; this will work."
She sighed and kissed Jensen's forehead. "It's going to be okay," she assured him, regardless of if he could hear her, and oblivious to Dr. Feldman continuing to adjust the dial. "Mommy will love you no matter what."
Abruptly, he stopped crying and looked at his mother in awe, his face puffy and covered in drying tears.
She smiled in disbelief. "Did you hear me?" she questioned, excitement laced in her voice.
His face lit up and he laughed loudly, reaching for his mother's hair. She laughed in disbelief and her eyes began to well up. Knowing her son could finally hear her sent a new sense of life coursing through her body. For the three hours that she feared her son would never hear his mother or anything else, the weight was finally lifted and she knew her son would have a better chance at a normal life.
Dr. Feldman said something, but she was too engrossed in talking to Jensen to notice. Being able to talk to her son, to have him listen to her without having to raise her voice, felt amazing. Between talking to him and kissing his forehead, Jade couldn't get enough of her son; she couldn't take her eyes off him as he smiled and bounced playfully. Jensen would smile wider and laugh a little more every time Jade spoke to him, and it amazed her how much joy he could find in her voice.
So of course there was that nagging thought of how long it had been since he last heard her…
Not long after, Beck entered the room and noticed his daughter on the floor. He smiled and picked her up. Darla didn't seem to mind and snuggled against her father, resting her head in the crevice of his neck and shoulder with her thumb in her mouth. He moved slowly with his daughter in tow over to his fiancée.
"How is he?" he asked, looking from Jade to Jensen with a hopeful smile.
She smiled slightly as their son turned to look at his father with the same awe he'd given his mother. "He likes my voice," she answered with hushed happiness. Jensen turned back to her with a wide, tiny-toothed grin and leaned against her chest. She placed a protective hand on his cheek and kissed the top of his head. "I still can't believe it; it's…it's like that worrying we did earlier doesn't even matter anymore."
Her fiancé's lips twitched. "We'll have to keep a close eye on him, though," he pointed out. "Are we going to try and teach him sign language?"
She sighed softly. "I guess we can," she replied. "We can teach Darla, too. It won't be easy for him not being able to hear well, so he may like being able to see people talking to him."
He sat on the bed and smiled at her. "We can do this," he assured her. "I'll do whatever I can to make sure our son lives a happy life. And I promise that no matter what, I'll be more understanding. I know how big a deal your brother is for you, and I promise I'll remember that. I love you and the twins more than I love my own life, Jade; I'd do anything for all of you."
She leaned over and kissed him softly. "I love you," she breathed.
He smiled back at her. "I love you, too."
Try to convince me that I'm not drowning.
Begrudgingly, Beck left Jade and the twins at the hospital in order to go home and pick up some overnight clothes for Jade and Jensen. Beck thought it would be good if Darla stayed the night, too, but Jade didn't want to expose her to the hospital that much. But for now, she would nap by her mother and brother on the hospital bed.
When he got home, he found Robbie lying on the couch. The awkward boy shot up with excitement when the door opened, but his face fell when he recognized his friend in the doorway. "Hey," he greeted dejectedly.
"Hey, man," Beck greeted back as he entered the house. "What's up?"
"Nothing," Robbie sighed, keeping his eyes on his lap. He looked up at Beck with pleading eyes. "Do you know where Cat is? She hasn't answered any of my texts and she should be home by now."
Beck grimaced slightly, feeling bad for his friend. "She's with this girl named Natalie," he announced. "I texted her earlier and said that I'd pick her up when she's ready to come home. You can go with me if you want."
"Really?!" Robbie exclaimed, his face lighting up.
Beck laughed slightly. "Yeah," he answered. "But I'll have to come back for you. I'm on my way back to the hospital after I pick up some clothes for Jade."
"Is everything okay?"
Beck nodded. "It will be," he answered. "Jensen…I'll tell you about it later when I come back to pick you up, okay?"
"Okay," Robbie responded, his enthusiasm deflated. "I'll see you later."
"See you later," Beck nodded off as he dashed up the stairs.
Robbie sighed, lying back down on the couch. The ring in his pocket seemed to pull him down further into the cushion, threatening to swallow him whole along with his sadness.
He was beginning to think Cat was avoiding him. He didn't get to talk to her much and she usually tried to spend as little time as possible with him. She always seemed distracted around him, almost like she wanted to be somewhere else.
What if she wanted to break up with him? What if she wasn't happy with him anymore? What if she was bored? He'd done all he could to make sure she was happy and he'd bend over backwards for Cassie, but what if it wasn't enough? If so, she had the perfect idea for an anniversary gift.
Would she really throw away all that they'd been through in the past two years?
