BARTIMAEUS
I wouldn't go so far as to say that she was ugly (seeing as how I really really really like being alive,) but I will go out on a limb and strongly imply it.
The entity that entered that dark smelly room was simply horrible to look at (and on the second, third, fourth and sixth planes she got progressively worse. (Oddly, she wasn't bad on the fifth.)) With her tall, scale covered reptilian body, squished face, purple horns, pink flamingo feathers and assorted fins and tentacles this demon was obviously making a bold fashion statement. (And that statement clearly was: I have no fashion sense.)
"Step aside, pathetic creature," her voice was like a bubbling gargle. "Step aside immediately or face total destruction."
I turned to address the petite dark-haired lass that had summoned me. "Well?" I said, "You heard the noble spirit, didn't you? All pathetic creatures are to step aside is what she said. Hop to it then, why don't you?"
"I was talking to you, little demon," the entity gurgled. "I was commanded to kill the human. I have no wish to destroy any of our own kind, even one as lowly as yourself."
I sputtered in indignation. "Pathetic? Lowly? Have you no idea who I am?"
"Should I?"
"I am Bartimaeus... of Uruk!"
"Never heard of you,"
"Builder of the Walls of Jericho,"
"Well you did a right bang-up job there, didn't you?"
"Why? What happened to them? Did someone graffiti my work? Because if they did, so help me, by my great and awesome power, I shall hunt down the buggers until they are so terribly-"
"Why is she still alive?" A strapping youth strode through the wrecked doorway and placed himself strategically behind the scaly demon. He was a tall boy, perhaps sixteen years with blond scruffy hair and a sturdy build. In the dim light he struck an imposing figure silhouetted against the white light of the open doorway.
The little dark haired girl whimpered.
"Awww," the boy crooned, "is the little birdie scared? Does the little birdie want to be put out of it's misery?"
"Jax, please," the girl said, her voice near hysterical, "you don't have to do this!"
"Oh, but I do, little birdie. Those are the rules after all. I didn't make them, even if I wouldn't change them." His gaze fell upon me. "And what is this supposed to be?" he asked his scaly servant.
Her answer came like a burbling brook. "The girl appears to have summoned a white bed sheet attempting to impersonate a ghost and making dubious hyperbolic claims."
"Such as?"
"It claims to have built the Walls of Jericho,"
"Did a right bang-up job then, didn't he?" (Alright! Mental note to self: Look up whatever happened to that wretched wall after avoiding near certain death.) "Anything you can't handle?"
"No, master,"
"Then tell me, Nautillisa, why is she still alive?"
The entity named Nautillisa reacted at once. She spread razor sharp fins and threw herself at the girl like a wave crashing down on a tiny surf. She splashed heavily against the plastered wall and nearly tore it down without noticing. The ground shook and the creaking structure mixed it's screams with the roar of a monstrous monsoon. All in all, it was really quite a splendid display of artistic nuance and raw talent. I give her a 'seven'.
I docked some points because the girl, her intended target, was not there.
In general I have no qualms with my masters meeting disturbingly macabre endings and have even orchestrated a few of them myself, but in this case I felt my lot fell on the side of the sniveling lass who summoned me. It was not pity as I'm sure some of you dullards may be naively contemplating. (Young humans are just as gross as their adult counterparts, and whinier to boot.) It was more that I could not abide siding with that Nautillisa creature. After all, she had mocked my bed sheet ghost disguise! (Honestly, had she never heard of classic retro irony? For shame!)
Being a sheet, I was in the perfect position to wrap myself around the screaming girl, engulfing her and absorbing most of the impact of the tsunami named Nautillisa that violently struck us. The wave pounded us against the wall and I helped it along a bit, creating a small hole that we were immediately flushed through from the force of the pressure. (I used the term 'flush' because, yes, it happened exactly the way it sounded.) We slid down a moldy warped hallway, carried along by the streaming jet of water behind us.
I quickly shifted my form into a stout penguin, grabbed a bunch of the girl's jacket in my beak and tore down at full speed over my improvised slip'n'slide. "We have to get out of here," I said through a beak full of jacket. "In a minute she'll see that we're not imitating really flat rugs back in that room and she'll come after us. And I really don't want to tangle with an Elemental Spirit right now."
"What is-" the girl tried to speak but only managed to cough up a lung full of water. "What... is... an 'Elemental'?"
"It's a really mean Afrit who's gone mental, alright? Now settle down and concentrate on breathing."
(Truthfully speaking, that wasn't the strict definition, even if one could make the case, but right then and there in that decrepit hallway I just didn't feel like discussing it. But for you, I'll give it a go.
You know how most creatures are composed of different elements. Of course you do. I, for example, am made of a glorious mixture of Fire and Air. (You reading this right now are undoubtedly formed from copious quantities of methane and puppy dog tails.) Elementals, on the other hand, have their source in only one element, hence the reason they are so deadly and mental.)
I heard a roar of frustrated fury echo behind and knew we were overdue for an exit. "Time to go," I said.
"Wait!" the girl yelled, "We have to find Melissa!"
"I'm sure Melissa knows where she is, little birdie. Right now what we have to worry about is ourselves. Specifically me." I caught sight of a partially shattered window and pushed myself even faster, aiming directly at it. Behind me I felt the water coalescing and hardening, forming clawing tentacles that grabbed for my flippers.
The window drew closer...
A viciously brutal wave slashed through the hallway behind us, tearing the plaster and cement like tissue.
Almost there...
An enraged sound struck us like a living sledgehammer, brimming full with hate and spite. "BARTIMAEUUUUUSSSS!" She'd remember my name now, I thought as we crashed the window and flew out into the open air.
I breathed a sigh of relief when the cool air hit my face only to squawk with panic again when I realized I had just leaped from a window thirteen stories up. (Of course I squawked. I was a penguin for crying out loud!) I swiftly sprouted large non-penguin wings and shifted the girl from my beak to newly formed talons. "Why didn't you tell me we were that high up?" I scolded the girl accusingly.
"The subject didn't come up," she answered levelly. I sniffed in annoyance and took a good first look at this new world. Grayness spread out in all directions from the steel-cast sky above to the rubble-strewn city that lie in ruins beneath. The devastation went all the way to the horizon and sent up the odd cloud of smoke and steam in streaming pillars. It looked as though a war had taken place here. Within the ruble all was still. Cold and lifeless without a trace of movement. A monumental tomb.
By contrast the skies were all aflutter with movement. Tiny specks zipped two and fro around the demolished city with dizzying speed. On closer inspection I saw that they were imps. Hundreds of little imps zipping all around holding little...
Was I seeing it correctly? Were they all holding little cameras? They were! They were flying around wielding little cameras and filming. I noticed then that a few of them had their recorders trained upon me, filming my flight like a horde of paparazzi. Overhead a massive clear dome enveloped the ruined city caging us in and causing a wave of claustrophobia to slew through my essence. "What the bloody hell?" I muttered. "What is going on? Where are we? What is this?"
"Demon," the girl spoke. She was calm and collected now and her words came out with cool determination. "You can call me Abby," (Of course I could call her 'Abby'. She was obviously hiding her true name.) "And welcome to what's left of district 12. Welcome to the fifteenth season of the ever popular, annual Hunter Games."
