Disclaimer: I don't own the show Life With Derek, or Eve 6, or the Amber Pacific song: Poetically Pathetic, which I love oh so much (it's my ring tone and I wrote another LWD story based on it!).
A/N: Okay, so the first thing I would like to say is how devastated I am about Heath Ledger's death. I'm really sad, seriously.
But I can't dwell on that right now. I need to thank everyone for waiting so patiently for me to get this chapter out. I've been so busy and all. And thank you so much for your reviews! They made me really happy.
Here's the next chapter! It's not that great, but I hope you guys still enjoy it.
--Beautiful Oblivion--
Chapter Twelve: if time could stop, how can I make this more poetic?
While Derek worked hard in the kitchen, actually concocting the hot chocolate he had promised, Casey sat by herself on the couch, staring out the window. She had pulled the curtains back so that the room was filled with a bright, natural light. As she looked out into the winter wonderland that was outside, she couldn't keep the small smile on her face from turning into a full out grin. She was reminiscing about the new memories she and Derek had created in that very same winter wonderland a few minutes before.
It was crazy, she knew, their relationship and how much they'd changed it but at that moment in time, she knew she wanted it, wanted him.
It had been a long time since she had been kissed by a guy as fervently as Derek kissed her. Actually, when she really thought about it, she wasn't completely sure if she had ever really been kissed with quite as much passion and eagerness as with Derek. The closest would have to have been Sam when they'd first started dating, but she really didn't want to even think about him at the moment.
She still felt guilty. And confused. How could she just change her mind about Sam and liking him in a night? How could she change her mind about Derek in just a night? What would people think? Her parents? Edwin, Lizzie and Marti? And what about their classmates? Especially Sam… and her best friend Emily.
Casey groaned and dropped her head into her hands. She rubbed at her temples but the questions just kept coming and coming and she was starting to get a major migraine.
Oh gosh, Emily, she thought. I completely forgot about her. How is she going to react to this? She had the biggest crush on Derek up until like, sophomore year.
Her smile slowly turned downward until she was frowning slightly, her mind was racing with all of her confusing thoughts and all she wanted to do at that moment was stop thinking, stop the guilt.
"What's with the face?" Derek asked as he bent over in front of her, offering a steaming mug of hot chocolate as he did so. She shook her head of the upsetting thoughts and forced a smile back on her face, then took the mug happily and shrugged.
"Not much. Just thinking about some stuff." Derek smirked.
"And by 'stuff' you mean me, right?" he asked as he sat down in his chair and got comfortable. She slapped at his knee.
"You wish."
"Well, duh." She shook her head at him.
"You see me frowning and hope I'm thinking about you?" she asked. "You're ridiculous."
"Oh don't pretend you weren't smiling like a kid on Christmas a few moments before I interrupted your little thought-fest. I saw you. You were grinning from ear to ear and I can only assume you were thinking about moi."
She just rolled her eyes.
"Whatever, dude."
"Okay, then what were you thinking about?" he asked her as he tried a sip of his hot chocolate. It was too soon. The tip of his tongue was tingling now with a fresh burn. Casey was wisely just holding her mug close her mouth, but she was just blowing at it, careful not to take the first sip until it had cooled down enough.
"I'm just thinking about…our friends and family, our parents mostly. Their reactions and whatnot." It was sort of the truth. She was worried about reactions.
Derek nodded when she admitted this.
"And what's the consensus?"
"I think they'll have heart attacks if they knew what we did this weekend."
"Yes, I can understand why they might react that way," he nodded thoughtfully. "Or… they'll be ecstatic that we…got along so well," he said, waggling his eyebrows suggestively. Casey narrowed her eyes at him.
"Yeah right. You're so funny. Don't make jokes about this. This is a serious situation we've landed ourselves in."
"Casey, I don't understand what the big deal is."
"Are you joking?" she asked him, giving him an incredulous look. He at least had the decency to look a little perplexed.
"Well, I mean, I understand the 'deal' but I honestly don't think it will come off as such a big shock to the people who know us well enough, like our family for instance. They probably saw this coming a mile ago."
"I don't know what you mean…"
"Especially Edwin and Lizzie," he continued as if she hadn't spoken. "They've probably been betting on us for a while now."
"Once again, I'm confused. Care to explain further?"
"What I mean is, I think your little crush on me was pretty obvious to everyone in this house. Well, except to me, maybe."
A second later, when the pillow crashed over his face and then was pounded on his body in several different places repeatedly, he admitted to himself that maybe he deserved it.
"My obvious crush?" Casey asked in amazement. "Up until yesterday I thought I was going to be starting things up again with Sam!" she practically screeched at him. Derek's color changed when she said this. "Up until yesterday I thought I might like him again!"
"Yeah, well thank God for snow storms," he muttered quietly.
"What was that?" she asked.
"Nothing."
"No, what did you say?" she restated. He rubbed his temples with his forefingers and let out a low growl.
"It's not important."
"I beg to differ."
"Just drop it, okay?"
"Are we going to start fighting again already?"
"Looks like it."
"Well that just sucks. I was kind of enjoying our 'let's be nice to each other' period."
He couldn't help what he said next, even if he was a little pissed at her.
"There are other ways that we can be nice to one another that has nothing to do with talking pleasantries," he said, and decided that maybe he didn't want to continue fighting with her. He even motioned with is thumb to the stairs. She gave him a disgusted look and stood up.
"Oh, you're unbearable."
"Unbearably cute?" he asked her with a lopsided grin.
"You did not just say that," she said as she stomped into the kitchen. He winced.
"Yeah, not my best moment." Then he groaned and got out of his chair to follow her to the kitchen. He sipped his hot chocolate as he walked over to her and spilled half of it down the front of his shirt in the process.
"Wow, you're a mess."
"I meant to do that."
"You did not. You're just clumsy."
"Are you seriously trying to call me clumsy, Klutzilla?"
"Ugh, you know I hate it when you call me that."
"Well I hate it when I want to kiss you and you keep being a bitch." Her eyes widened in anger and surprise when he said this.
"Oh, and you thought that was going to get you anywhere?"
"Well from my experience this is the part where you grab me and have your way with me." Her jaw dropped when he said this and she let out a small growl, or maybe it was a hiss, either way, he knew she was pissed.
"That's what you'd like me to do, wouldn't you, Venturi?" she spat. "Well, I'm sorry to say that I'm actually quite disgusted with you right now. And you expect me to kiss you when you're being such a jerk?"
"You like it."
"You know me so well."
"That I do."
Some how during their short exchange they ended up face to face, only inches apart and even though Casey was still annoyed with him, she really did have this ridiculous urge to grab his collar and kiss him. So that's exactly what she did.
--
"I think I have a problem," said Casey, breathing heavily. Her forehead was pressed against Derek's and he seemed to be having just as much trouble as her with his breathing.
They were still in the kitchen and they had been kissing for about five minutes.
"I would have to agree. Apparently you only like to make out with me after we've both been yelling at each other."
"Ugh," she groaned. "You're revelation doesn't help me. What am I going to do?"
"I suppose we could try something new," he said. She gave him an inquisitive look.
"And what exactly do you have in mind?"
"I guess I could try saying something nice," he cringed a little when he said this, "to you and then you could try to do the same to me."
"I don't understand where you're going with this and how this is going to help me with my problem, you."
"Well, after we do this, then we can try to make out again."
Casey pulled away from him and bit her lip, but he knew she was considering what he was proposing.
"Well…" she started, but he cut her off.
"I've always thought you were pretty, even when we first met, but every time I would think it, I'd kind of mentally kick myself and then stop thinking it. But it didn't stop it from being true to me. I just sort of had to get over the fact that you were pretty. You were still a freak to me."
He realized then that even though he was being honest and trying to tell her something nice, maybe calling her a freak in the process wasn't the best way to go about it. He tried to fix it.
"A freak with pretty hair and pretty eyes and a nice…" he almost said "ass" but decided to stop, "you know, nose."
Throughout his entire little speech Casey just stood there and listened to him silently. She let herself react to his words with her facial expressions, ranging from shock, to happiness, to shock again and maybe a little annoyance, but when he said "nose" she had to speak up.
"You did not just compliment my nose."
"I think I did."
"Yeah, maybe, but that's not what you were thinking. Come on, go ahead. We're being honest here. Say what you were going to say."
"No."
"Aww, come on. Why not?" she teased, stepping closer to him again.
"If I say what I was going to say, you're just going to get mad at me and then my idea won't work…so, I'm not going to say another word." She stared at him to see if he would break, but he just nodded his head to confirm that he was done speaking.
"So I guess it's my turn?" He nodded again. "Fine. Okay. Let's see, something nice to say to Derek…" She pretended to think really hard and started to laugh when he frowned at her. "Don't worry, don't worry. I'll think of something. Like, okay, since we're being honest, I can tell you that when I first met you, I really didn't understand why every girl around you seemed to think you were so good looking—"
"Wait a second, how is this supposed to be nice?" he interrupted her. She rolled her eyes. "And stop rolling your eyes at me. I'm serious."
"Just hold on, okay? I'm getting there. Anyways, even though I couldn't understand it then, after a while, I started to get why all the girls thought you were cute, on the outside. But that was it. After a few months of living together I decided that you were pretty cute, but I still didn't like you or your personality."
"But you feel differently now, right?" he asked, smirking down at her. Her pause made him frown again.
"Sure," she said, not very convincingly.
"Right, because that makes me feel better."
"Oh, come on, Derek. Don't even pretend that you like me completely the way I am. I know you still think I'm a keener grade grubbing Klutzilla. And plus, your compliments were completely vain, 'You're pretty, I like you, blah, blah, blah," she imitated.
"That may be true but that doesn't mean I can't appreciate you for the way you are, now at least. I find your annoyingness slightly endearing and cute. You always know what you want and stand up for yourself even when I'm being the biggest jack ass to you. You're a strong person and I admire you for that." She couldn't help but smile at his words.
"That was kind of sweet, Derek. Nice even."
"Yeah? Well don't get used to it. I take it back. This saying nice things to one another isn't going to work. You were right."
"Aww, don't be like that. Here, I have something else to say. I really like how sweet you can be with Marti and how amazing you are at hockey."
"You think I'm amazing at hockey?" he asked, his eye brow raised. "You've only been to like, a couple of my games."
"Yeah, but it's obvious how good you are." She could tell she was feeding his ego the way he started to grin at her.
"Go on."
"Well, I like that you're so good at hockey because, um, apparently I'm really into jocks," she finished lamely.
"Right, I don't really want to hear about that," he said.
"It's not a big deal; I was just making a statement. Sam plays hockey with you and I really liked him, and Max, well, he's the captain of the football team, I and I really liked him."
"I'd really rather not hear about your old boyfriends, thanks," he said and he crossed his arms across his chest as he did so. She couldn't help it; she started to giggle at his obvious jealously.
"Seriously, Derek, chill out. I like you now. Me mentioning your hockey skills was supposed to be a nice thing. It wasn't supposed to make you act all pissy at me."
"I am not acting all pissy."
"You kind of are," she said and started to laugh again. He rolled his eyes and started to walk away from her.
"Wait!" she grabbed his arm just as he was about to leave the kitchen. She made him turn around and face her and then she stood on her tip toes and kissed him lightly on the lips. "I'm sorry if I got you all angry. I think you have nice hair." Her plan of aversion worked. He grinned down at her once more.
"I do have nice hair."
Just as he was about to lean down and kiss her once more, they heard the front door open and watched as Edwin walked in.
"I'm home!" he called out, throwing his sleepover bag to the floor.
"Great," said Derek just as Casey walked into the living room to greet his brother.
"Hey, Edwin!" she exclaimed at him, plastering a great big smile on her face.
--
A/N: I'm going to go cry now. RIP, Heath. RIP.
