thanks to my reviewers-
Desert Devil-chan-here's your update!
CryOfTheGhost-thank you! ah sorry about the cliff, just had to do it
Ragnarok-The Fallen Angel-did i make it too depressing?
Paprika012345-lmao
AzArGuRl-yeah i guess it was evil...but here's your update!
eternalwings15- well i haven't updated in a while too.
YounamemeArika-thank you!
Raincurtain-i took a long time but here ya go!
JessYukiOnna-lol yeah...sorry about that. whoot! riku's hot!
kibawhitefang -thank you!
ghostioanddaigona-haha that would entertain me as well
Black Roses666-must read your story...ahh i've been so busy but i will read it! sooner or later..
Reiana-lol i like brownies though.
I know this was short but please bare with me.
Chapter 10:
"Until The Day I Die"
'Why shouldn't I love him Kashaku?'
Hitori…she'll cause you more pain than you'll be able to bear.
'What are you talking about?'
She'll kill him. She wants revenge, she'll kill Gaara in front of you. She'll torture him in front of you. She'll tear your heart and leave you bleeding on the floor. That's what I meant.
'I won't let her! Gaara isn't weak! He can stand up for himself!'
It's better if you don't love him, you'll feel less pain.
'Shut up! You don't know anything!'
I had screamed 'shut up' outloud. Nagori gave a scared and puzzled look at me. I stood up from my chair and ran upstairs. By the time I arrived to my room, I was in tears and I was sobbing. I locked my door behind me and fell on the bed, sobbing loudly.
How dare Kashaku say something like that? He was lying. Gaara wouldn't die, he wouldn't! Then, a vision of Hitori thrusting a sword into his chest appeared in my head. I began to cry more, wetting the pillow. I didn't want Gaara to die. What would I do without him? I would never let Hitori harm him, I'll defend him.
"Gaara…" I said weakly.
"I love…you."
It was true, over the time we had been together, what was it now half a year? Maybe a little less. I remembered how I had met him, while I was with my brother and his friends. I should thank my brother, if I see him, for taking em that day. My brother…I'm not Kusota, he's not my brother. I wish this could be different, I wish I could be someone else. I wanted my life to return to what it used to be.
Someone was knocking on my door softly. I knew it was Nagori, he would never pound the door. He treated everything with kindness. I wiped away the last of my tears and stood up. I opened the door trying to cover my face with a hand. Nagori smiled sadly and hugged me. He obviously knew that I had shed tears. I cried into his chest, I was afraid for Gaara and myself. I didn't know when but this had to end.
"Kashaku make me breakfast."
I opened my eyes and Nagori released me. Gaara was standing with his arms crossed, looking at us. He looked angry. I looked away because I didn't want him to see that I had been crying. Nagori greeted Gaara and headed downstairs. Then I noticed Gaara turned to me and said,
"You have better things to do than be affectionate with someone who could betray you."
"What?"
I was confused. Was Gaara jealous? He actually thought I had feelings for Nagori? I sighed and walked over to Gaara to explain to him what had happened. He looked away from me and walked downstairs before I could say something to him. I stopped myself from following him and thought about what Kashaku had said. Maybe it was better that I don't care for him. Maybe it was for the best. I didn't follow Gaara but retreated back to my room. I laid down, face up on the bed. A silent tear trickled down my face.
Why did I have to be alone? Why do I have to suffer? I loved Gaara and I only wish he could be happy. If the Forbidden didn't exist maybe we could live peacefully. Maybe I could have the life I've always wanted.
See? You're already feeling pain
'Everyone feels pain Kashaku! Anyway, I love him, so I can't help it…'
Hateshi…what will you do if he doesn't love you back?
'Wh-what?'
He might not love you back.
I turned over trying to block out Kashaku's voice in my head. Truly, I wouldn't know what to do if Gaara didn't love me back. I would still love him but it would hurt, if he didn't return my feelings. Maybe Kashaku was right, maybe I should concentrate on different things.
I'm not quite sure when I fell asleep. All I knew was that when I awoke, I saw the night sky out the window. I sat up and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. I grabbed my black sword and my regular sword and trotted downstairs and out the door. The wind blew my short blonde hair around. I sucked in the fresh air into my lungs. I hadn't trained in a long while. I headed to a quiet area and started to practice my sword hand.
I tried to use both swords but it was heavy and difficult. At one time, I slipped and fell. I cut my hand on my blue sword. I grunted and sat up. I had the Forbidden's cloak on. I pulled my hood up and brought my knees up to my chin. I could feel the blood trickling down my hand; I could also almost feel the blood trickling down my heart.
Silent tears poured down my cheeks. Where did I truly come from? I knew I was born in this…world but then I came to the world where I was known as Kusota. Why did I go there? Kashaku once told me that I was born with the ability to control the darkness and he was born with the ability to control light.
I heard footsteps walking towards me so I lifted my head. Gaara was standing over me, he wasn't angry anymore. When I saw him more tears came out of my eyes. I didn't want Hitori to harm Gaara…I didn't want her to kill him.
"What did I tell you about crying?"
I smiled and wiped the tears from my eyes. Gaara sat next to me and looked up at the sky.
"Kashaku told me."
I turned to him and uttered, "What?"
Gaara stood up, "Forget it."
I stood up next to Gaara. He just simply walked away. I don't know why, but that angered me. How could he just walk away from me like that? A flashback of my dream came through my head, the monster.
Later that night…I was sitting on the floor in my room. I thought about what Kashaku said. Maybe I shouldn't have feelings for Gaara.
Hateshi! Hateshi! Listen to me.
'What?'
You must revive me. Hitori is going to unleash her plan soon.
'What plan?'
I do not know yet but you must revive me.
'How would I do that?'
You'll need your dark sword…
'Why?'
Because you can control darkness and that's what the sword is, darkness.
'I still don't get it. How is a sword going to revive you?'
It's not really reviving me. It's more of obtaining a body and attaching my soul to it.
'How am I going to get a body!'
We'll have to borrow one…
