Emma had never felt Regina come back to bed. She felt horrible for yelling at her, but her future was so uncertain. She flipped the covers down and saw no sign of Regina in the room. She wandered over to the balcony. The night was beautiful, but then she was reminded what a mess her life was about to be. A baby, Regina leaving, the evil queen returning. She hit the fence hard.
Regina had been up all night. She couldn't make Emma feel better. But she could give Emma a choice. She made a two potions. One for if Emma really did not want to have a baby. She wouldn't force her to have Henry. She made another potion too, a potion of forgetting. If Emma really couldn't handle losing Regina, if the worst happened and she was wrong and the other Regina didn't want Emma or worse this potion would ease the pain.
She had dark circles under her eyes from ten hours of reading and trial and error. She was walking with the potions back into the room when she saw Emma on the balcony hitting the fence. No. This reminded her of when she was in the same place, doing the exact same thing, contemplating jumping.
"EMMA!" Regina ran across the room. And when she reached Emma pulled her back ten feet from the fence.
"Get away from there!"
They went toppling to the ground.
"Regina, what the hell!" Emma was lying shocked on the ground.
"I know what you were doing."
"Regina I wasn't DOING anything. Are you insane!"
Regina was breathing heavily.
Emma lost her fight and her anger and gripped the other woman tight.
"Regina hey what's wrong? I'm fine, really."
Regina tried calming herself down.
"This happened before 30 years before. I was standing there hitting that gate, it broke!" Regina's eyes were wild.
"Regina, it didn't its fine."
Pulling her into a hug.
Regina shaking her head.
"I was thinking about jumping, I was hoping it would break and I would just fall and it did. Emma never do that again! I can't lose you!"
"Regina if that happened you wouldn't be here would you? And I wasn't planning on jumping…"
Emma nodded to strengthen her resolve. But Regina could see the truth.
"Tinkerbell broke my fall, that is why I survived. And your lying."
Emma looked away then back at Regina.
"well… if I was thinking about it, I have good reasons, but I still have hope right? According to you?" emma tried to force a smile for Regina.
"Emma, promise me you won't. Right now. I can't go home until I know you will be safe." Regina shook Emma.
Emma was jolted back to reality.
"Ok. Regina, ok."
Regina pulled her into a hug.
"Regina you look terrible. Is it because of what I said? I am sorry, but I just don't know if I…"
Regina handed her the potions.
"This one…" she pointed at the blue. "Is your first way out. You don't have to have a baby Emma. It is always your choice. I am sorry. The purple one is a memory potion. To forget the memories of me if they become too painful.
"Emma I love you. I will do anything within my power to keep you safe. Even if that means forgetting me."
Emma pulled Regina to her.
"Thank you."
