The song from the last chapter was A Quiet Mind by Blue October, and I don't have one for this chapter…Maybe…Let me think about it…Nope. I don't…Too bad…

Title: A Quiet Mind

Rating: T

AU: No, for once.

Archive: If I ever figure out how to work Amorous Intent, then perhaps.

Summary: '…I'm in pain, but I won't let you band-aid the wound…'

Alexandra Eames detested the men who hit their wives in the dark corner of the life they lived and went to work the next day showing off a picture of her to his friends. She loathed the men who downed drink after drink and ached to slam the fragile glass into the flesh of a fellow human just to feel the reassuring guilt that meant they still possessed a soul. She hated the men who twirled their wedding band around a finger while eyeing a young girl dressed in her older sister's makeup and itched to take the suffocating ring off. She despised herself for thinking these things of Bobby now, but they all crowed her mind as she stood there with him hanging onto her in his apartment.

She felt one of his hands tighten around her waist, and his fingers gripped her tight enough to stop her breathing. His fingers were not the reason for her shortness of breath. The coldness spreading through her body had nothing to do with the fact that the lower part of her shirt was soaked in his tears as he tried desperately to fix what he had broken. The only physical factor that ailed her was the red stain down her cheek. From the cut a trail of dark red worked its way down her neck to rest in the nook of her collarbone.

Bobby's body shook and every fear, everything that fought so hard rise to the surface and erupt from him did-it already had. And now he knew what was to come, but would give anything to stop it. The bits of the mug that dug into the skin of his legs left trails of red on the floor, and he could feel his knees slipping out from under him. He could feel this, but the cause was unimportant to him. All that mattered was Alex, and all that he could do was not let her go.

The silence was filled with anger, but hungered for more. Alex, although every part of her screamed for anger, vengeance, and to do some sort of bodily harm to Bobby, she fed upon the silence until it was quit sure who would do the rest of the deciding for the night. She spoke.

"Bobby, let me go." Her voice was even, unwavering, and it surprised her. The only answer came in the form of a muffled sob and the quick movements of his hands. His grip tightened. "Robert Goren, let me go." No response. "Goren!" Panic seized her, and she spun, brought one knee up to his chin and one foot to his stomach in quick succession. Alex, as always, had impeccable aim. She watched him crumple to the floor at her feet. She knew where that fear had come from, but she hated it. Never had she feared her partner; she had only ever been exasperated if anything, but now…Now, she hated herself for allowing it to come to this. The man she called her best friend fallen at her feet crying and surrounded by a halo of red.

That thought fired off every synapsis in her brain-red. Blood. There was no way that was her blood…Somewhere in the back of her mind she was smiling.

'Look at him, on his knees before you. The mighty Robert Goren brought to his knees not by Nicole, but by you; the genius, the golden boy of the Major Case Squad, brought to his knees, crying and begging, by his useless partner. Let him bleed. Look at your own hands. You placed your life in his hands and this is how he repaid you.'

Her fingers twitched as she eyed the back of his neck. Alex could feel her chest tighten in anticipation of what she could do to him.

'You've done everything for him. You've put up with being the shadow of him, and being treated as a second rate trophy partner, and you shouldn't have to. Look at him. He's pathetic, laying there on the floor begging. You've broken him, and now you can be better than him-do anything to him. Even when you escaped it was the genius detective that everyone worried about. Poor guy nearly lost his partner and his mother. But, oh no, let's not worry about the partner who hung there for hours…You escaped without him. You, the shadow, survived without his help. You don't need him. You never did need him. Whatever you felt before he didn't deserve. End it!'

Her eyes glazed over as she watched his body shake. His arms covered his head, and his body was folded over itself for protection. She smiled. Protection…

She felt the whisper in the back of her mind bend her knees. She balanced there, kneeling in front of him in a mock position of his that displayed her power. With one graceful movement she lifted his face up from the floor. Her honey rimmed eyes stared into his, but they held none of their previous compassion and humor they usually did. His eyes were wet; cheeks tearstained; and the look of pure desperation in his eyes stopped the whisper for a moment. Her eyes softened. She ran one finger across his cheek lightly and felt Bobby barely lean into the touch. His eyes asked for her permission. His eyes begged for her permission.

"Alex, please…" She ran her finger across his cheek again, but this time her eyes followed the red smear it left on his skin.

'End it!'

Alex ended it. Her fingers twitched and she dug her fingernails into his cheek. His eyes widened and darkened as he realized what had just happened. For the second time that night he threw his arms around her. This time there was no pulling away from it. They tumbled over together onto the floor behind Alex, and Bobby twisted his body around in mid fall to protect her. Whatever had crossed his mind earlier was gone forever and had left only caring, wanting and the undying urge to protect Alex in his thoughts. She landed on top of him two seconds later.

Her hands shot out only to hit his chest. He grabbed her hands and pulled her back towards him. Her hands were captured quickly by his right hand, and his left hand captured her neck. He held her there in neither a threatening nor a loving embrace. His eyes starred straight into hers as he leaned towards her. His forehead met hers. His mind blocked out the sharp intake of breath and the tensing of her body. The arm he had used to hold her there slid down her back to keep her in a tight hug, and he nuzzled against the side of her neck.

"Alex, please. I didn't…No, please…" Somewhere in the back of her mind the whisper was yelling and a small echo was waging war against it. She could feel the whisper loosing. She shifted her weight against Bobby's chest. Lowering her head to his ear she softly rubbed her cheek against his. Bobby stopped his mantra and looked at her. His eyes were empty of everything but her, and she felt the whisper die slowly, painfully and completely. She kept eye contact the whole time.

"I will not forget this, Bobby. I will not forgive you of it, and I will not trust you as completely as I once did." She felt his fingers loosen from her shirt. His eyes widened in horror. "I will never forget one word that you said, and you will not ever be allowed to speak to me again." She watched his eyes die at those words. "In that manner ever again. If you ever give me reason I will not hesitate to leave you, and I will feel no regret whatsoever about leaving because of what you did." Through his shirt, the space between them and her own clothes she felt is heart flutter back to life at those words. "Do anything like that again and I will not hesitate to send in the exact same letter as I did those years ago." She pushed herself away from him, and this time he did not struggle to hold onto her, but followed her into the bathroom.

She stopped at the doorway and flicked her hand into the room. Bobby went before her eager to do whatever she asked. She followed him and pushed him softly onto the edge of the tub. Grabbing one towel she leaned down to eyed the long ceramic shard that had lodged itself into the flesh of Bobby's knee. She wet the towel, but in one swift movement her hand was stopped by his, and she found herself sitting on his knee with him gently cleaning the blood off of her face. He shook his head at her protest. His voice was no more than a whisper.

"Never hurt you again…Never…" She let him clean the small cut, and sighed. As good as that sounded and as could as his embrace felt she couldn't believe him.

TBC

So, shorter, but just as depressing to write. Review and I'll give you my eternal love.