A/N: Ah, Tsuki… I love him so much. He's just like me. Lied to and manipulated by someone you loved. Actually, his dialogue to Shuichi is from a few notes that I wrote to the person that hurt me. He is so much braver than I am... :sighs:

NOTE: Supposed to be choppy. To be filled in with flashbacks in chapter ten when… oh, that would be spoilers if I told you!


Chapter Nine: Meeting and Discretionary Lovers

Tsuki sighed, going through his iPod. Finally, he gave up, not finding a song fitting to his mood.

He felt as if something bad were going to happen… It was a very unpleasant feeling.

He stopped, looking around. Central Park. Just the place he felt he should be. Tsuki smiled, pocketing his iPod and ear buds. He closed his eyes and hummed, walking contentedly around.

It was late spring, and a very nice breeze was wafting through the trees, making the day a very appealing one.

Sometimes, Tsuki thought, the city is an alright place.

He brushed his hair back into his hat, strolling down the seemingly endless sidewalk.

The day was peaceful; mothers took their toddlers out for strolls, lovers walked hand in hand. It was enjoyable, and seemingly unbreakable.

That was until Tsuki spotted a certain blonde somebody sitting and listening to a CD.

"OI!" He burst out. Tsuki never was good at keeping in outbursts.

Eiri Yuki looked up, instantly recognizing Tsuki. "You." The word seemed to reek with hatred, and it was practically spat.

"You're that bastard!" Tsuki exclaimed. He scowled instantly, this was that guy that Shuichi had been hung up over!!!

Yuki raised an eyebrow slowly, peering at the boy from over his glasses. "This bastard… has a name, kid."

"I don't think you deserve a name at all!"

Yuki rolled his eyes. This kid and Shuichi were a lot alike. Slowly he stood, brushing his pants off as he did so. "I don't particularly like you either, brat."

Tsuki gave a soft growl. "Just as rude as I thought you'd be! It would take a lot for Shuichi to hate someone; now I see why!"

Yuki frowned, staring at the purple-haired boy for a moment. "Did he say he hated me?" he asked, his voice sounding a little hurt.

"Not explicitly," Tsuki mumbled in the manner of a child being caught in the cookie jar. "Just… highly inferred."

"I gathered that from the hospital, I suppose…"

"Hospital? You were at the hospital?"

Eiri scowled at the drummer. "Of course. The night he was admitted."

Tsuki's eyes went wide. That's when Shuichi had started acting oddly. "Wh-what… happened?"

He was nervous, but he didn't expect anything big. Just a little argument, that's what he wanted. But somewhere deep down, deep in his gut—his instinct—told him differently.

"You don't want to know. You're his… lover… right?"

Tsuki gave a weak nod and swallowed dryly. "Does that mean you slept with him?"

"Yes," Yuki said shortly.

Tsuki gave a soft gasp, his hands shaking slightly. "You're lying… You're lying!"

And with that, the drummer turned on his heel and ran.


Hiro scowled deeply at his best friend. He didn't like what he was hearing. "… And then that night at the hospital, huh? What are you doing to Tsuki. … You're using him, aren't you?"

Shuichi stared blankly at the wall. "Yeah. I feel really bad about it. But at the time… I thought…"

"That he would help you forget Yuki?"

The once-again-pink haired singer nodded dully. "Yeah."

Hiro stood, eyeing his friend in distaste. "Tell him."

"I am."


The air was quiet in Shuichi's apartment. The two men stood opposite in the sitting room, the atmosphere no lightened by the harsh halogen lights and the absence of the normally soothing music. Neither made a move to speak until…

"I spoke to Yuki… did you two—"

Emotionless, Shuichi cut him off. "Yes."

"Were you—"

Again, Tsuki was cut off before the question was even half-formed. "I was using you. Yes."

Tsuki stared blankly at Shuichi for a long time. Then, as the news sank in, he began to cry.

Softly at first, but it soon grew into violent, body-shaking sobs that was more wails and heartbroken snuffling than actually tears. The boy hunched over, crying until his legs grew weak and he fell to the ground. He choked on his sobs, coughing and spluttering as he tried not to hyperventilate.

All in all, not a pretty sight.

Shuichi bit his lip, shuffling softly.

After a long time, Tsuki calmed enough to talk.

"Y-you… You led me on! You lied!"

Shuichi stared resolutely at the ground, his face or eyes betraying no emotion.

"That's not fair! That's not fair at all! Why did you even let me think that I had a chance!? Why? It's not fair! I've liked you for years!! Why did you lead me on?! Why did you let me think that I had even the slightest chance?! If this was your intentions all along, then why? You're a manipulative bastard, that's what you are! Do you even realize how utterly stupid and worthless I feel right now!? I bet you don't! Am I so little to you that you can just lead me on like that?! I feel so humiliated right now, I want to just die. Why did you let me do all this? Why!? Did you like the attention, having little naïve Tsuki wrapped around your finger? Did you like seeing me make a fool of myself?!" Tsuki took a deep breath, suddenly growing cold. "You have made me feel utterly humiliated, stupid, and an absolute fool. You have manipulated me until I was twisted around your finger, but you know that, don't you? I feel stupid for chasing after you for so long. I am a fool for thinking I had a chance with you, and now I feel humiliated, because now I have to tell all those people who cheered me on that I got shot down for your ex." Then, finally finished, he raised his hand and slapped Shuichi... hard.

The vocalist dropped his head, and he hollowly asked, "…Are you finished?"

"Yes… with this and the band."