"Come on, breathe into the stick." I took a long drag, my hands shaking beyond recognition and my mind were on overdrive. I woke up from another nightmare from moments before, the nightmare of the battle in the small town. I tried to go back to sleep, but it was of no use. I could still hear the screaming and the buildings being blown up, it was so vivid and so real that I was beyond tired to close my eyes again. I was back at a hospital nearby, spending the night there so in the morning I could help with any of the wounded. Doc was there for a brief moment before he would head back with the Easy Company. But as soon as he saw me, against the wall on the floor with my head in my hands, tears coming down my face, he wasn't going anywhere until I was sane again. Fat Chance.
He explained to me the results of what happened in Carentan: the counter attack and how we lost about 60 men to that battle. The men celebrated last night while I was here in the hospital, having a few beers and playing darts while the new recruits joined them. Doc told me the whole story: Buck was playing darts with a man named Babe, Guarnene was giving three of them a hard time, and Lipton becoming 1st Lieutenant.
It was even worse when I heard about what happened to Tipper: being mauled and hit hard by an explosion. My heart broke for him, having me realize that I was merely on the other side of the town when it happened and he was beyond repair. Poor Tipper, I was with him for awhile in the battle and I saw him fight so hard with Luz. Luz was wrecked too, the both of us going through our own mourning.
I took a long drag from the cigarette, blinding my eyes a few times before Doc rested his hand on my neck to both check my pulse and to make sure that I was okay there. Nurses were coming in left and right, helping the wounded that were already there. And here I was, having a minor nervous breakdown in front of them and another medic tending to me.
"It's normal, Marley." He reminded me, being so close as we were just murmuring to one another, "This happens to the best soldiers in the field. You just need to relax, it's all in the past now." I nodded my head, having me feel the smoke escape my lips and I took in a big gulp before I spoke.
"I didn't think the nightmares would be that real." I commented, seeing him nod his head and sit next to me on the hospital floor, having me stare ahead and see the white walls in front of us.
"That's all they are: nightmares. You'll get used to the fact that you'll wake up in the morning and you can start all over. But think of it this way: you saved that family from being bombed and killed. That was another nightmare that will never be." Doc explained, having me look over at him as I took another drag from the cigarette and I saw that he was trying to make me feel better. I was glad he was there, making this whole thing a title lighter for me. I smiled at him slightly, seeing him grin at me and then seeing Winters walk over to the both of us. But he was not alone at all, there was another soldier behind him and looked a bit more concerned about me. It was Joe, having my own heart feel a bit better and my smile wanting to come out. A part of me wanted to get up and salute Winters, but my legs and body were refusing to get up. Doc stayed down with me, having Winters squat down in front of the both of us, having me see he too had bag under his eyes and looking beyond tired. Joe stood away from us, leaning against the door and looking down at the three of us on the floor.
"I came here to check up on the both of you, along with Blithe. You alright?" He asked me, his voice was genuine and sincere with me, no longer laced with commands and leadership. I nodded my head, taking another drag from my stick and seeing him smile at me.
"I am sir, thank you," I replied back to him in a light tone, though it was laced with shakiness. He smiled at me, a warm one that I saw him use with Blithe at the small safe house. I looked over at Joe briefly, having me see him give me a small smile that was showing but love and appreciation. He must have been concerned about me since I came here last night, having me not see him since the battle.
"I was told what you did for that French family, and I came here to thank you personally for your hard work and bravery." Winters explained to me, having me see Doc reach over and lay a hand on my knee to give me support as I was hearing the praise from Winters. Even Joe looked at me in wonder, having me see that he never heard what really happened and what I did for the family. I only saw it as a survival tactic: getting the family out of there and making sure that they were safe. But Winters saw something else, as did Doc. I had to work on what I saw vs. what other people were seeing in me.
"Because of your bravery with that family, in which made the lost of lives less, and with your handwork and dedication with the Company: you are going to rewarded a Bronze star by our higher authority." I looked at him amazed, seeing him look at me with such seriousness that this showed this he was not joint. Did they want to reward me? For getting a group of people out of the town before, they could get hurt? It didn't seem right or fair with the other men in the company who were literally losing their lives for the same reason. But by that point, I had no reason to argue with him and to give it away from me.
"Thank you, sir." I thanked him, seeing him give me a small smile before looking over at the soldiers out on the beds.
"I'm going to go check on Blithe, and I'll grab you two for our next mission." He explained to me, both Doc and I replied back a "Sir." together before he got up and walked away. I sighed, looking ahead of me and leaning my head back, closing my eyes and hearing another set of footsteps coming over and then having me feel a set of hands on my knees. Looking up, I saw it was Joe, who was squatting down in front of me with a sincere grin on his face, but I could see he was concerned about me. Doc then tapped my neck, having me look over at him as he got up from the wall.
"I'm gonna check on Blithe with Winters." He said to me, having me nod my head as he looked carefully at both Joe and myself. He knew about us, I was sure of it. But he was more concerned about me, acting like an older brother towards me and making sure that I was okay. I smiled at him, seeing him watch me before I signed I'm okay to him. He walked away then, not needing to watch the both of us anymore.
"I heard you were over here, that you didn't come back to camp last night," Joe explained to me, having me look back at him and see him watch me carefully, "You okay?"
"It was just an a long day yesterday and I needed to help with the men here." I replied, hearing him sigh and sit against the wall with me, carefully taking my hand in his and having me feel the warmth with our fingers intertwining in the hallway of the hospital room.
"Well, Luz was worried about you, along with Bull and even Lipton….I was worried since I haven't seen you since the battle started." He went on, having me lean my head against his shoulder as he went on talking, "I'm just glad you came out okay. I had to take care of Tipper after he came out of that shop.." my head poked up from his shoulder, looking over at him and see him also looked a bit damaged from what happened to Tipper.
"You saw him?" I asked him in a low tone, having me see him nod his head and I sighed in defeat, putting my head backdown on his shoulder.
"Hopefully, we can be done with this whole war before Christmas, that's what they talked about this morning in the meeting," Joe explained to me, rubbing my hand with his thumb and having me breathe out in relief and peace, "This new place we're going to: we have to hit it hard or else it won't be worth it." I nodes my head, showing that I understood.
"Just think of it this way, once this whole thing is over, I can take you to San Francisco and show you the bay." Joe reminded me, having me grin against his jacket on his shoulder as he continued, "You can see the bridge. Hell, we can walk on the damn thing if you want to. I can take you to my favorite place for a beer, and we can dance all night. Only if you want to." He was being too much for me, trying so hard to make things better for me. And I was glad for him, beyond glad and grateful as I looked around us for a moment with our eyes, seeing that we were alone. I leaned up and kissed him on the jaw, seeing a big grin on his face as I placed my head back on his shoulder, wrapping my arm around his and still holding his hand. Leave it to Joe to make the things in my life that were getting dull and dark more bright and beautiful.
"I would love that, Joseph Liebgott."
I walked alongside the road that was paved in our huge area, the rest of the soldiers were prepping to get ready for another drop off in France as they were our next destination. I was jumping, once again, with Buck whom as still fine with me being strapped in front of him. Much to Joe's dismay as I told them how this was going to work, but he was fine with it none the less. I had no idea he had a jealous side to him, over a simple jump. But he was still a mystery to me, a handsome one.
The new recruits were getting along fine with us, though some of them were on the edge with us already being seasoned in warfare then they were. To me, they looked so young and so innocent, which made me wonder, did us in Easy look like that when we started?
The sun was beating down our necks, having me wait with Doc for the medical truck to come with our new supplies. The truck was coming any time now, having me think it was Christmas time for us since we needed the supplies more than ever before. I had my hair down then, no longer needing the braid for the day as Doc was ruffling his own hair, which was getting longer as the days went by. Looking over at his hair, I grinned, ruffling it with my own fingers playfully.
"You need a cut." I said out of the blue.
"I'm not going to Liebgott. No offense to your boyfriend, I don't trust him with scissors." He explained in a gruff, having me smirk.
"I don't blame you. I'll cut it once we find a moment or rest over in France, okay?" I asked him, seeing him smile and nod his head once, looking over to our left. I was still having a good day, a great day, but it was all shot down to shit when I saw the look on Doc's face. he looked like he just saw a ghost, the color drained from his face and his eyes were far from being warm. I grabbed his jacket to get his attention.
"What is it?" I asked him, clearly confused as to what was going on. But he pointed, saying nothing as a truck with our supplies was coming up. I looked as well, seeing who was at the front of the truck and my own face went downhill.
Sobel.
The rest of our company was frozen solid, watching them with both anger and sadness in their faces, mostly shock as well as he drove by them, looking at every one of them and having me feel my chest was about to burst in pain and confusion as to why he was there. He still looked stern, the same look back at Camp Toccoa as Lipton walked over to the same truck to get a fellow wounded soldier, Popeye, out from the truck with ease. They both talked to each other as I leaned over to Doc, clearly not liking that Sobel was here.
I shoved him, seeing him look over at me now and I signed to him: What is he doing here? He shook his head, signing I have no idea. I sighed, looking being my shoulder and seeing the other Easy Company men clearly agitated with him being here.
"That's him alright." I heard Bull said aloud in his Arkansas accent as he walked past me, going to a new private that was getting his bearings ready. I looked back at Sobel, seeing him get the things ready to be taken off the truck. But then he looked over at me, his eyes found my own and I felt my own feet being glued to the floor. Doc must of saw this, seeing that I was now afraid of the men and he grabbed my arm.
"Come on." he whispered to me, pulling me away from the spot, having me turn with him and all away, not wanting to have another confrontation with the man. I needed to focus on the mission at hand, not a past demon. I took in a deep breath, reminding myself that I was not the same girl that was in front of him in the mess hall who was on the brink of tears. I was stronger than that, much more. I walked over to Buck, seeing him get his now things ready on his jumpsuit and he smiled at me.
"You ready for round two?" he asked me, his blue eyes shining in the light as I nodded my head.
"Let's go."
"Keep moving!" I could only hear the order once over the mass amount of people celebrating us, shaking our hands and hugging us close as we were moving through the small town of Eindhoven, Holland, flags were waving in the air, songs were being sung, and it didn't even feel like we were at war at all. I was in the middle of a mass party to be fair, and the people were beyond glad to see us.
People were wanting to shake my hand and even hug em close to them as if I was some kind of savior. I stayed close to Joe, who was clutching my hand the whole time as we weaved out way through the area, though I wanted to smile from the sheer joy on their faces.
"This is insane!" I said to Joe over the noise as we moved our way through around the citizens. I had to take my helmet off at the time, having my hair roll down past my shoulders and then see a couple of men looking over in my direction. One of them leaned in a kissed me quickly on the mouth, having me hear the shouts of cheers from his friends as he pulled away. It was so quick, but Joe pulled me closer to him and I saw the hint of jealousy again in his eyes.
"Oh, come on! It was nothing!" I reassured him, having me see him roll his eyes in annoyance.
"What a punk move with that guy." He said in a bitter tone, having me pull him back from walking any further, grabbing his collar and pulling him down to kiss him lightly on the lips. I could feel him smile in the kiss, having me frozen in the middle of the celebration and I pulled away from him. He looked dazed, then grinning at me up and down.
"Better?" I asked him with a raised eyebrow. Joe nodded his head, kissing me quickly once more.
"Very much so, you lynx." He joked with me, having me laugh as we continued on with our walk. I could see the other men were being occupied by the hugs from the women and the festivities: getting kisses and getting long drinks from the wine and whiskey given to them. It reminded me of home: the loud music being heard and the people in the streets, looking so at peace with all that was happening. It brought a moment of happiness through my soul, jut a moment. But as we were going through the small square, I could hear a chant coming through the area, it was getting louder and louder. I got closer to Joe, not knowing where the chanting was coming from, but it didn't sound good. Not at all.
It wasn't until we saw a woman being dragged off by her arms by two other men, wearing yellow armbands on their sleeves towards the middle of a circle that was made by the people, all whom were the sources of the chanting. They were saying the same thing, over and over with such venom in their voice. It was contrasting the joy of the festival around us as Joe and I pushed out way through to find out what was happening. What I saw brought me to tears, almost. There were women, in torn clothes, and men shaving their head as they were in tears and sobbing. I had no clue why this was happening to them, their hair falling in front of their faces and their tears soaking their cheeks and skin. I stayed behind Joe, seeing him watch with solemn eyes and saying nothing, as did the rest of our men who were watching as well. We were all so confused: happy one minute with the rest of the population and now looking in grief and shell shock.
"What are they chanting?" I asked Joe next to me, who was clutching my hand harder and looked like he was about to be sick. I wanted to know the word they were saying, since it sounded so vicious and so bare in the open light air that was around us. But Joe shook his head, still watching as another woman was shoved away with a battered bloody hair and torn clothes.
"I don't even want to know." He replied, having me look behind me at the other soldiers watching. They all were floored: including Bull who still had his cigar in his mouth.
"What did they do?" I heard one of our soldiers ask to my left, having my eyes still be on the young woman who was now bald with patches on her head, a Swastika was drawn on his forehead with black ash.
"They slept with the Germans." Someone replied to him.
What were we getting ourselves into now?
"Where is he?!" I heard next to me as I finished another soldier's bandage on his ear, having me look up to see the scene around me now. We were in a new town in Holland, and Operation Market Garden just begun. We were in way over our heads, especially the new recruits and how they were handling the fighting. I bolted away from this solider, seeing him hop up and rejoin the men in the shoot as I ducked behind a fallen mess of bricks, seeing a tank that was in fire roll by me so slow and looking more like a monster in my eyes. This was worse than Canteran, much worse.
"I can't find him! I can't find Bull!" I heard behind me with the recruits under his command. Having me panic. I saw him only once in this whole battle, running with his rifle towards the enemy with his leader-like stature on his body. Was he hurt? I and to go find him and make sure he was okay, making me realize that I was going to get an earful from both Doc and Joe if they knew what I was doing.
I then saw him, running for dear life with no helmet on while being chased by the peppering of a machine gun on top of one of the buildings. I bolted after them, thinking this was a stupid move on my part, but I had to make sure that he was safe. Stupid me and my stupid need of protection. I wasn't getting fired at, but I had to be more careful as the machine gun hit the tank that he ran behind. I bolted after him, faster than even and catching up to him before I knew it.
"Bull!" I screamed, having me see him look behind me and then grabbed my jacket to keep up with them. Before he could say a word to me, an explosion was right behind the both of us, such a force slammed us down into a trench and we both fell on our faces and chests. I felt my breath leaving me, Bull gasped out as if he was hit. It was a moment for us to collect ourselves, but the moment was gone when I saw Bull look behind us and see that the tank was still rolling after us, and it was on fire.
"Marley, get out of here!" He yelled at me, the both of us still running beyond normalcy. Before he could say another word to me, an explosion was right behind the both of us, such a force slammed us down into a trench and we both fell on our faces and chests. I felt my breath leaving me, Bull gasped out as if he was hit. It was a moment for us to collect ourselves, but the moment was gone when I saw Bull look behind us and see that the tank was still rolling after us, and it was on fire.
"Move! Come on Red, we have to Move!" He grunted to me over the fire as we both started to crawl in the trench as fast as we could, the tank getting to us faster and faster. I could feel myself getting tired as we kept moving, but nothing was going to stop me at this point. I could hear Bull grunting through some kind of pain that he was feeling in his shoulder, I could see the crimson on his jacket.
"Keep going!" I heard him tell me as he looked at me briefly over his shoulder. I kept pressing on, hearing the telephone pole above us snap in half as it was mauled down by the tank. Someone in the distance screamed, "Bull!" But we kept going, having me see an opening into a sewer system that Bull was getting to. He shoved it open using the back of his rifle, getting inside and pulling me in as well.
The area was to small for the both of us, having me stay behind him as he closed the gate, shielding us from the German soldiers running up in our direction and over the hill that was above us. They didn't see us, but this meant trouble. We were stuck here, with none of our men in sight, and we had to wait until we were safe and away from the Germans. I gulped, looking over at Bull who was still watching the area carefully.
"Where's Easy?" I asked him, seeing him look back at me with worried eyes.
"I don't know, Red. We're stuck here." He explained to me, having me watch with him as German were still going through the small city and talking to each other in their heated language. Stuck, no longer able to move or get out of there in time to find our company. If we left the hole, we would be shot on sight. But if we stayed since we would be lost without our men.
"We need to stay out of sight until nightfall, that's our best bet. Then we can hightail it out of here and find Easy." Bull explained to me in a whisper as we saw more and more men coming through the area. I leaned back against the brick wall that was behind us, having me close my eyes and breathe. We were literally sitting ducks, waiting for our funeral.
Oh Great.
