All I felt around me was the cold, bitter cold. I shivered in my coat, walking in the snow with my backpack on, Archer poking his head out and looking around as I was walking in our new home: Bastogne. Ever since we were brought out here to take care and finish the job that the other men tried to start, it was nothing to coldness and us trying to survive the winter. Some of them were used to since, but I wasn't. There was no snow in Louisiana, not the kind of snow like this anyways. I hated the cold, I preferred the heat over anything. So this whole situation left a bitter taste in my mouth. But it was not as bitter as me still trying to get over Joe Liebgott.

But it was harder than I thought.

As I was walking in the snow, my mind was still going back to him and how it didn't feel right talking to him anymore. I had to rethink my motive here in the army, why I was here in the first place and what I was meant to do. I didn't need his vicious way of thinking against the Germans, which made me ask myself why I hated it so much. They were humans, not monsters or beings with no minds and emotions of their own. My religious side of me came out then, having me remember the things my mother taught me: Love the sinner, hate the sin. I then sighed in my spot, the air escaping my lips and having me see it in the chilly air. I had to talk to Joe, it didn't feel right me not saying a word to him. But when was I going to muster enough strength to just look at him?

I saw a figure ahead of me, having me pause and see the soldier wanting by himself towards a spot in the forest. The trees were bare and covered in snow white and ice, having me then touch Archer's head, who was looking around curiously.

"Down boy, down." I commanded him, eyeing him tuck his head in the backpack and I walked over to the solider standing there. There was something on his arm, a white band. Smiling in relief I knew it was Doc, but why was he out here by himself, walking like he just saw a ghost. I jogged over to him, but he didn't look back to see me or to smile. Something caught his eye, something serious.

"Doc." I said to him, standing next to him and see what he was looking at, my optimism was long gone now. We were in front of frozen bodies, all who looked fresh but none the less dead. It seemed morbid for me to see this since it could happen to us at any time. We were beyond freezing, and this was a normal death now for us to get used to. Carefully and without rushing myself, I grabbed his wrist and pulled him back with me. Something went off in the distance, far away, like a gun. We had to get out of here.

"Come on Doc. Come with me." I urged, seeing him then turn with me and we both started to jog. The sound came back again, a little close but still farther away for us to go warn someone in out company. we jogged then, not looking back again as we came across Winters, trying to shave with a cold tin of ice water and his brush. Once we were close enough to him, we heard another sound, having all three of us freeze and Winters get up slowly. He motioned to us to get down.

"Down, you two, down." He whispered harshly, Doc and I crouching low and waiting for something to happen. Nothing at first, even for a solid 20 seconds. We then followed him around the corner, staying behind him and then seeing pull up his gun to aim at a shadowy figure that was a bit away from us. I could only make out his figure since the snow was thick enough to engulf him the scenery. Winters spoke in German a couple of times, having us wait and see what would happen. Everything nowadays was in pins and needles, and the silence was killing us from the inside out.

I hated the silence.

Doc and I watched in silence as Winters talked to the men in charge after he sent the captured German soldier away, tossing Doc a roll of bandages and having me smile at him. We were too low on supplies, far too low for me and Doc to get used to. We were literally begging for anything that we could get our hands on, Medic Spina as well since he was a medic with us there in the winter-like fortress. It was getting to the point where Doc and I would have to make rounds to other Battalions and see if they had anything. Well, Doc would. He wanted me to stay with the group in case they needed someone there.

"We need more medicine." I whispered to Doc, seeing him nod his head as he went to talk to Winters about our situation. I looked behind us both at the men, all who were freezing in their spots and trying to lighten each other up in the mood. I could tell the winter was getting to each of us, no longer light but bitter in our own ways. For some reason, my eyes landed on Joe, who was talking to Toye and Lipton, but then he looked at me too. Before we could even stare at each other for one solid second, I looked down and away hearing Archer ruffling around in my backpack. I shrugged the thing off, placing it gently on the floor and seeing him pop his head out. I dug out a small piece of jerky I had left for him.

"Here you go, you scavenger." I replied to the puppy, seeing him eat the jerky in a greedy state in my backpack as I smiled slightly. It stilled pained me, not being able to go to Liegbott and tell that that I was sorry. What was holding me back from him? I didn't have time to think about what until I saw Doc come over to me, a huff in his stance as he shoved his fair cold hands in his pockets once more.

"Come on, time to beg."


"You don't have any medicine on you?" I asked another soldier in his foxhole, having me see him shake his head at me.

"Sorry Marley." He replied, having me sigh and get up from squatting next to his foxhole, shifting the collar of my jacket up to cover my neck as I smiled at him briefly.

"Thanks." I replied, walking away and looking at the area. I already asked all of them for things we desperately needed: Morphine, plasma, bandages, and scissors. It was one thing to tear with your hands, but when your hand are getting iced over, it's not clean enough. No one saved their morphine from the incident in Holland, since they used it then and not thinking we would need it now. I wondered how Doc was doing with his own hunting as I went to another foxhole, hopping in and seeing that I was with Muck and Malarky.

"You boys got anything I need?" I asked them all in a huff, having Muck shake his head.

"I got nothing' for you, Red. Sorry." he replied as I saw Malarky go into his jacket and take out the small yellow blanket that I was needing.

"I didn't use it, thank Christ for that." Malarky explained to me as I grabbed it and placed it in my satchel.

"You're making me fall in love with you, Malarky." I said in a comment as he grinned at me from ear to ear.

"I knew you loved me!" He commented, having me hear Muck groan as I then shrugged off the pack, placing it in between them.

"Keep an eye on Archer for me, will ya? I need to keep hunting for some more supplies." I said to them, having Malarky move the top of the bag away and Archer move his head around, lapping at his fingers with his tongue.

"I'll do my best as his Uncle." Malarky said back to me in a grin as I hopped out of the foxhole. I could run faster with nothing on my back, not that I hated having Archer with me.

"Thanks, Uncle Malarky." I said over my shoulder as I jogged to the next foxhole, hearing Muck laugh and Malarky as well. I was trying to keep my spirits up with the cold, but it was getting harder and harder for me to move around since my body as wanting to freeze over. I needed warmth, and it was hard for me because I was so used to it from the Louisiana sun and heat. I was afraid that I was going to die out here than anywhere else in the freaking war because of temperature.

"Gingembre!" I heard Doc call out to me, having me look over my shoulder and see him jog over with a serious look on his face.

"I sent Spina out to the 3rd Battalion to find anything else we need. What do you have?" He asked me as he was trying to rub his hands together for warmth.

"I got one thing of morphine and an extra thing of socks we can use for bandages in case we are desperate." I explained, having me see him watch my hands carefully. I looked down too, the tops of the hands were tinted blue. They were going dangerously cold now. Doc immediately grabbed him, having me grunt as I felt him trying to warm them up.

"You need to watch your hands, Marley." He explained to me as I felt the warmth coming back very slowly but surely, "You're no Medic without your hands."

"I"m nothing without my hands." I muttered to him, feeling the sense of hopelessness come through me like a wrecking ball. Doc looked at me with his cold serious eyes now. He squeezed my hands tightly.

"Hey." He said, getting my attention back on him now, "You don't talk like that. You hear me?" I nodded my head, seeing him smile at me slightly before releasing my hands and having me shove them in my pockets again to keep them warmth.

"I'm going over tonight with Babe and Spina to find more supplies. You mind staying here in case something happens?" He asked me, and I shook my head. I was fine being alone at this point, more than fine with it. Hell, it was fine being surrounded by people whom knew what was going on with me and Joe and were afraid for another powder keg of an explosion.

"Fine by me."


A couple of more days came and went, Doc and I finding time to ourselves together during meals that were scavenged around in the area. They were slim to none when it came to food, but I was just glad to have something in my to stomach that was not going to want to come out when I had to down for a few seconds. I was mostly used to it now: walking around by myself with Archer in my pack, keeping myself busy with more hymns and songs in my head, and having meals with Doc. Most of the time we were in silence together, no need for talk to chit chat. I think we both were trying to survive by just helping as much oxygen in our mouth as possible.

At night, we would take turns with our rounds, going around to make sure others were okay and try to cater to them. One night Doc even found out Toye has had no shoes on him for awhile and he needed to find him some. I felt bad for Doc, seeing him being overworked constantly and not able to rest. I tried to pull more of my own weight too, not wanting him to have most of the burdens.

"Take a load off Doc. I have this now." I reminded him, seeing him look at me with hesitance before he settled to sleep in his own foxhole. I placed Archer next to him, he snuggled into Doc's arms and they both slept. Closing the drape over the hole, I walked from there around the area, having me see heads poke up and see who it was walking by their homes. Once they saw it was me, they went back talking or sleeping. I didn't mind walking by myself, not really. It made me think, both of good and bad things. Right now, I was thinking of home and how warm it was. It made me feel warmer already, so I kept thinking about the summer time and the humidity that hung in the air.

"Hey Red, sing us a song will ya?" I heard someone yell out from a foxhole, having me look over to see it was Guarnene, who had his head poked out and looking over at me with a hint of hope in his eyes. Others agreed with him, having me smile as I stood in the freezing cold night. Would Joe want me to sing at this point? I didn't mind, having me clear my throat as I started to sing an old hymn that I remembered from my mother:

Stone cold broke in the middle of the winter, oh like a poor man's son.

Stone cold broke in the middle of the winter, oh like a poor man's son.

My father is a hard-earned worker; my mother has a heart of gold.

I was never much younger, but I feel twice as old.

Stone cold broke in the middle of the winter, oh like a poor man's son.

Stone cold broke in the middle of the winter, oh like a poor man's son.

I could picture her in my head, putting the clothes on the line in the spring time near sunrise and me sitting there on a log, watching her as she sang with her sultry of a voice that made me wish I sang like her. Her hair was blowing in the wind, her voice was carried to the sky and she was heavenly.

But I've got money for food and a little bit of gasoline.

I've got plenty of time, but I want everything now.

I don't need no gold or silver,

Oh, I only need a few new things.

Oh, I would buy pearls for my lover,

Oh and a brand new set of guitar strings.

I smiled through the song though I could hear another conversation happening next to me. Someone was talking to another person in a soft whisper, too soft for others to hear. But I heard it clearly, for some reason as I continued with the song.

Stone cold broke in the middle of the winter, oh like a poor man's son.

Stone cold broke in the middle of the winter, oh like a poor man's son.

I feel a cold wind blowing;

Dark clouds form on the western sky.

I've got a feeling like knowing that everyone here will someday die.

"Ich vermisse sie." The voice said, having me hear that it was on the brink of sadness. I knew that voice, but I didn't want to say anything. He was talking about me for certain, but what was it? I had no idea. But I heard someone else reply back to him, since he too apparently knew German as I walked away and back to my own foxhole.

"I know, and I bet she misses you too."


I hopped into another foxhole, covering myself with my arms as another tree fell to my left and shook the ground. We were under fire, and both Doc and myself were scrambling around to help out whoever needed it. It was harder for us, since we had hardly anything to work with expecting for the handle of morphine the Easy company men gave us the night before we were bombed. I grabbed the soldier who was hurt, looking at his damaged hands and started wrapping them quickly, taking out one packet or morphine and getting it in his system before he could even refuse it. After cleaning him off and getting him underway, I help him up from the foxhole.

"Get to the jeep and get out of here, go!" I ordered him, seeing him jog with his damaged hands, having me hear another cry for a Medic. I took in a deep breath before hopping over and bolting to the sound of the cry. Bullets were all over the place, trees were being pierced as I tried to dodge the wood falling on me. I tried running as fast as I could through the snow, though it was harder than on gravel. Once I hopped over a fallen log. I was slammed to the floor from a bullet hitting my helmet. I grunted, hitting the ground and feeling the snow against my skin. I tried to breath, but the force from the bullet made me loose it for a moment.

"Medic down! La Noux is down!" I heard from afar, someone was watching me. I looked up, seeing the foxhole where the damaged soldier was. He needed me, and I was not going to let a bullet to the helmet slow me down. I shot up, bolted as fast as I could and within seconds I hopped into his foxhole. He was screaming in pain as the other soldier was shooting away from us to the Germans. His ankle was broken, a clean break and the blood was pouring out.

"Hold still, soldier." I urged him, seeing him close his eyes as I wrapped the ankle after cleaning off the blood. He couldn't walk, not like that. Once he was finished, I got him up on his knees.

"Help me carry him." I told the other soldier in a grunt as I got one arm around his waist he got the other, the three of us shooting up from the foxhole and running over to the vehicle that was taking wounded from the battlefield to the hospital. We tried to run with him, but it was harder for me since the wounded soldier was heavier than me. But we got him there in time.

Doc was already there, going to the hospital with the wounded soldiers already there. I got the man on the jeep in time for Doc to look over at me, clasping my bloodied hand in his own stained hand.

"Take care of them." He said to me, having me nod once as he drove off with the wounded, away from the battle and I was left there. A bunch of men needing me and looking to me for help. I took in a deep breath, taking off the helmet that I was wearing and seeing the bullet mark that could have killed me if I took off the helmet that moment.

Lucky bastard.


I prayed with the rest of the men, having my eyes closed and saying what I needed to say in my head. A combat priest was there with us that day, having us receiving blessings and for us to get our prayers and confessions out of the way. I was glad for it too, since my heart was so heavy from all the things around me. We were all saying our last prayer when I heard the jeep coming up behind us, hang me think that it was Doc coming back from the hospital. I opened the eyes, hands were folded, and I looked up at the Priest. He was still reading from the bible, my eyes then going over to Joe for some reason.

He was next to Luz, who was still praying. But Joe wasn't praying. His eyes were open and looking ahead at the floor near his knees, having me wonder if he was okay. One of these days we were going to have to talk, once and for all. But the priest finished the prayer, having me cross myself before getting up slowly with the rest of the men.

"Fight well for your God and your country. God Bless you all. Stay safe." The priest said to us all as I looked over, seeing Doc coming back with a cart filled with supplies. Both Spina and I walked over to him, seeing him look at the both of us.

"Battalion wants a reconnaissance patrol. Kraut Hunting." Spina explained to him as Doc nodded his head, handing him the crate.

"All right, I'll go. Take these. Give the boots to Joe Toye, and tell him they are a nine." He explained to Spin was we both started walking together to the Easy Company men that were ready to travel.

"Let me go with them, Doc. I can handle it." I said to him as we were approaching Sargent Jonny Martin.

"I can do this, Marley. The men need you here." He argued with me. We both stopped in front of Martin, who held up both of his hands to us.

"We only need one you guys. Doc, sit this one out since you're been running around as it is. Red can come with us, it's not a big job." He explained, having Doc look over at me and see me nod my head at him. He needed a break, a bit one, since he's already gone back and forth enough as it is. He sighed, nodding his head.

"Yes sir." He replied, having me smile at him and then follow the group out into the patrol. I looked back at him once more, seeing him watch me carefully as I moved farther and farther away from him. It was as if he was thinking I wasn't going to come back. I was coming back, wasn't I?

Would I come back?


We were walking slowly, me staying close to Buck as we were moving our way in and out of the trees in the still silence. I was out in the far left of the group, having me look around to see if we too were being watched. It was an eery feeling, to eery for me to get under my skin and used to. This was better than being back at the base, doing nothing again. But then I saw we were crouching low, having me do the same as someone was hearing something that they were used to. I waited, along with the men as we were about to go and take cover. I looked over to the other side, seeing Sargent Martin tell a younger Solider, Private Julian, to go and get ready. But as soon as he was out in the open, shots were heard and he hit the ground in blood.

Panic.

I was about to go over to him when bullets were flying at me, A bullet grazed over the shoulder strap to my satchel, having the strap snap off my shoulder and I felt the bullet pass over my jacket. If it was a centimeter lower, I would have been shot. It hit the floor as Luz grabbed my arm, having the both of us run away from it and over to cover. The bullets were everywhere now, and I was caught in the middle. It was having me crouch down behind a log with Luz and we were waiting for the gunfire to let up. But it was no use. We were literally stuck there.

I peered over the log again at Julian. He was still on the floor bleeding out and Babe and Bull were with Martin now, trying to figure out what to do. My mind was back on the blood on the snow, a silent invitation for me to come and get him out of there. This was my job, and I had to do with without fail or worry. Once I heard no gun was happening within a second, I bolted.

"Red!" Luz said aloud after me as I ran, having me dodge the trees and the wood flying in my direction. One tree was shattered to my left, having me feel the wood slam into my face and the splinters being injected into my skin. But I had to run to get to Julian. Once I was near him, I hopped behind the logs where the other three men were.

"We need to get him out of there." I said to the men as they continued to shoot the Germans from their spot. I was about to go for my satchel, then I realized. It was gone. I panicked, looking around to see where it was when it hit me like a ton of bricks.

The satchel was gone. Oh God no.

The bullet sliced it off, having me look behind me and see it there. 600 feet away. In the white snow and it was waiting for me. I was nothing without my medicine, and I had to go get it. But it meant that I was throwing myself in the open fire and I was about got be asking for a bullet to the back if I ran.

"Shit." I grunted. Bull then was looking at me and seeing where I was looking. He saw the bag too, then looking back at me and seeing the look of determination and stupidity on my face. I had no choice. I was nothing without it, and I needed it.

"Don't you dare." He warned me, but I got to a squatting position behind the pile of logs. This was stupid, really stupid what I was about to do. But it had to be done.

"I need to get that bag, or else I can't help him." I hissed at him, but he shook his head.

"You'll be shot, Red." He warned me, having me glare at him one last time.

"I'm not letting another man die while I'm here breathin'. You have another idea, be my guest." I said to him, having now Babe and Martin look at me, then to Jullian who was on his last leg. I had to get the bag to him to at least buy him time before we got him out of there. I was willing to put my own neck on the line for the kid, since I knew they would do the same for me. Bull already saved me once, as did Buck. It was my turn to pay them back. Before they could say anything to me, I turned on my toes and ran as fast as I could.

I ran, ran and never looked back once. I saw the bag getting closer to me as I was dodging bullets flying my way and the tree parts falling on me. I had my eyes on the prize, and the after I ran, the more confident I got. They weren't going to touch me, I had no weapons on me to hold me down or slow me up. But as I ran, I thought back to the other times where I had made a stupid move and almost got killed. This was the icing on the cake. Doc was going to be mad, as well as Winters. But would Joe be mad at me now? Was he even knowing what was happening to me?

I wished he did, I wished that we never fought at all. It left a sour note in my chest and head as I was getting closer to the bag and having the victory be against my fingers. That fight left something cold in me, something cold and vile. I wanted nothing more than to kiss him again, to feel those lips that were cocky and flirtatious against my own and sweep my mind to something beautiful and eternal. Goddamnit, I loved Joe Liebgott.

I loved him.

I slid on the snow on my knees, grabbed the satchel and holding it in my hand. The two straps that were broken were flapping in the wind as I reverse my direction to run back to the men. They were still firing as I was trying so hard to keep the pace I was at. I could hear some of them yelling at me to run, run for my life and back to them where I knew I would be safe.

"Run, Red! Run!"

"Keep goin', girl!"

"Don't Stop, Red! Keep running!" I listened to them, knowing that this was do or die. The closer I got to them, the bigger target I was and the firing would be on me now since I was in the wide open. I dodged the trees, bullets hitting them as I was getting faster and faster. Jullian was still on the ground, bleeding out and he was my next destination. I had to run with my legs and fight my lungs to keep up with me as I was literally sprinting in the snow now. I was about to reach them, so close with about fifty feet to go when it all happened. So quickly yet so slowly.

A grenade went off.

The grenade launched me in the air, flying up high and the chill of the air was slamming me hard in the face. My helmet flew off of my head, having me see my red hair floating as if it was weightless around my face and neck. I was flipping in the air, still holding the satchel. Everything slowed down in my mind, having me close my eyes and brace for what was going to come next. I could hear the whistling of the wind going against my ears and helmet as I was then slammed into a tree. The tree hit me so hard, breaking something inside of me, that I was knocked out when I fell into the snow beneath me. My hair sprawled out like a halo around my head, though I felt death creeping on me.

I saw nothing but darkness, not at first. I opened by eyes over briefly, the pain soaring through me. I heard someone scream out. My breath left me as I knew that voice: Joe. He screamed, the scream sounded like he as dying.

"MARLEY!"

And I was out cold.