Chapter Five

No One Can

Ron stood on Platform 9¾ looking at the majestic Hogwarts Express. Its steam billowed up in fluffy clouds, gradually fading into thin wisps. The platform was bustling with animated students, all chattering with each other and catching up on events of their summer holidays. Animals sat patiently in cages, waiting to be loaded onto the train. First years bade anxious goodbyes to their parents. All around him, the air was alive. He couldn't help but feel detached and apart from this happy, carefree world of friendships.

Ron gave his mother a numb hug as she said her emotion-filled goodbyes to the group of students. They all boarded the train, and Ginny left the others to sit with her year-mates. Harry managed to grab an empty compartment while Hermione and Ron dashed off for a quick prefect meeting. Afterward, they found Harry again and settled in. Hermione, for once in her life, didn't immediately pull out a book but instead made small talk with Harry about quidditch and classes. Ron was left feeling more alone than ever.

Grabbing his bag, he wandered out of the compartment and strolled the corridors. He came to the loos and walked into one, locking the door carefully behind him. Leaning against the wall, he let out a deep sigh. He felt so empty and devoid of feeling. His mind was reeling with thoughts of how he was losing his friends. They just didn't seem to care as much. They didn't notice him leaving, and he knew that no one was coming to make sure he was alright. He was falling deeper into his depressed mood, and he knew he should try harder to make himself snap out of it, but he was starting to really believe his friends didn't care at all. He let out another sigh and tilted his head up, eyes closed. Something needed to change. He knew he couldn't last all year with things going the way they were.

Ron was going to be alone this entire year. Harry and Hermione would spend all their time with each other. He should have known this would happen eventually. Especially once hormones kicked in. Either Ron or Harry would surely go for Hermione. It was a given. But he hadn't thought about how much the other one would be alienated. It hurt a lot to think that they hadn't even noticed how much they were drifting apart. Ron didn't have other friends like them. He had no one to go to when he wanted to talk something over. He reached into his bag and pulled out a black leather-bound journal with the letter R branded into the leather of the front cover. It was the one thing he had bought himself with money he had earned from working at Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes over the holiday. He pulled out a quill and ink and began to write.

Fuck. Fuck life. I'm getting more and more miserable. No one talks to me. Ever. They can't see my pain. They're wrapped up in themselves. It doesn't matter to them. They have deserted me. I have no one to go to.

I'm alone.

No one can hear my voice.

Crouching in the shadows.

And no one can see my face.

Sitting waiting.

And no one can feel my pain.

There's no one who will touch my life.

Ron shut his journal and ran his fingers over the letter imprinted in the cover. He laughed to himself at the thought that he couldn't even bring himself to write his biggest secret in the pages of his journal. Ron kicked the wall. Biting his lip, he grabbed his bag and left. Wandering around again, he found another empty compartment and changed into his school uniform, frowning as he pinned on his prefect badge. He stretched out on a bench and fell asleep.

The sound of the train horn woke Ron up. He stood up, stretching, and grabbed his school bag. Walking off the train, he was met with the magnificent sight of Hogwarts. He glanced around and saw Harry and Hermione. He walked over to them, and they both smiled and said hullo.

"Ron, how come you never came back from changing?" asked Hermione. "We thought you would."

"Oh," muttered Ron, "I fell asleep after I changed. Sorry."

"Doesn't matter, mate, cause we're back at school!" cried Harry, throwing an arm around Ron's shoulder, grabbing Hermione's arm and then steering them to the carriages. The three walked over and hopped into a carriage. Neville ran up behind them and climbed in, tripping over the top step and spilling his papers.

"I'll get them!" chorused the occupants of the carriage. Laughing, they all bent over to help Neville pick them up.

"Oh, thanks you guys," said Neville. "I was running late and I didn't want to miss the carriages. Then I saw the thestrals and, well, let's just say I didn't want to stand around looking at them." Ron saw Harry shudder involuntarily at the mention of the thestrals.

Ron hadn't told his friends he could see them now too. He wasn't sure he would ever tell anyone about that night. It was too painful to think about.

They arrived at the castle, but even its splendor didn't lift Ron's spirits very much. He lagged behind as Harry and Hermione laughed and chatted their way to the Great Hall. Neville caught up with Ginny and started talking with her, leaving Ron alone.


IloveRon: You'll just have to wait and see! And yes, Wandlights is a parody of Highlights. We thought it would be funny if the wizarding world had their own quirks, just the way we do.

Sailor J-chan aka Luna Weasley: The reasons Draco refused the Dark Mark will become clear as he gets closer to Ron. And we will see Ron hopefully about equally with Draco, more so as their storylines interweave.

Princess Of Mirrors: Thanks! Ron's family wasn't really our focus, sorry if they were dull. But in upcoming chapters, we hope to develop Ron even more.

Thanks to Pickle-Kitten, rupertsgurl, RDFCFSAF, and aishteru for their reviews also!