Author's note: I have always preferred the BBC interpretation of Tommy and Barbara and some of the backstory and episodes differ considerably from the books. Here I needed some backstory in the next few chapters so have adapted from the books rather than create something new.
"I thought we might all have dinner tonight around nine," Daze breezily told Tommy when they came back to the main room.
It was only three o'clock but they had missed lunch and he was not going to wait six hours to eat. Tommy considered making Barbara a late lunch but Judith and William were visiting the celebrant to ensure everything was ready for Saturday evening and he could not bear the idea of sitting around making small talk with his mother. "Barbara and I might head into the village. We skipped lunch so we could catch that train. I'm a bit peckish."
Daze was pleased; getting them to spend as much time together as possible was part of her plan. She had suspected a late dinner and the threat of spending time alone with her might force them to go exploring. "Enjoy yourselves and don't do anything I wouldn't do!" she said as she opened the sliding door and went onto the balcony.
"That leaves a lot of scope then," Tommy muttered under his breath.
"She was just being nice Sir."
"She's up to something," he retorted, "I just don't know what. She's probably booked a young Swiss ski instructor for the afternoon to polish her pole technique."
"Tommy!" Barbara was shocked by his disrespectful outburst about his mother. She had never heard him be so vulgar but now they were both staring at each other as they realised she had finally called him by his name. Barbara blushed and bit her lip.
Is that what I have to do? Tommy was bemused that the second cipher key was to shock her. Even in chastisement his name sounded divine on her lips. He contemplated kissing her right now to see if he could shock her into saying it again. The way she was biting her lip and trying to avoid his eyes made his reason dissolve and his desire rage. He took one step towards her before his eye was drawn to his mother peering at them through the window. All thought of disclosing how he felt vaporised. "I'm sorry but I still have issues with her it seems." He turned and started down the stairs.
Barbara followed cursing herself for reacting that way. She had known he and his mother had a troubled relationship and she had a broad idea about the past but she had thought they were closer now. Tommy expected certain standards of behaviour and took it hard if things did not follow his world view but this was a level of bitterness that she had not seen in him before. She never wanted him to think so badly of her. She resolved to try harder not to show anything that would make him think she thought of him other than as they were now, friends. She would try to stop imagining his eyes said anything but friendship. She would try to stop imagining his eyes...
The narrow streets of the town did not let much natural afternoon light fall on the roads and yet surprisingly it did not seem shadowy to Barbara. As they walked down the main street she marvelled at the dual nature of the buildings. At street level there was the glass and whitewashed walls of the lively shops. Above these the brown timbered apartment and hotels captured the essence of a long forgotten rural age. The shop windows discreetly presented their wares and there were no garish signs or hazardous racks of cheap goods to navigate around. It reminded her of London of an earlier age before cheap, imported plastic trinkets and pop up shops had come to dominate the shopping strips.
"This place feels, I dunno, unique," she remarked.
"No cars I think," Tommy replied, "it feels less hurried."
"I like it." He had visibly relaxed in the few minutes it had taken them to stroll into the village and that made Barbara more at ease. She was pleased he had not said anything about calling him by name but she would be more careful.
They stopped to look in some of the shop windows. One souvenir shop had all the usual junky curios including bright and funny fridge magnets that appealed to Havers' humour. She bought one that had a cheeky dancing cow wearing lederhosen. Tommy was amused by her choice but he would never know that there was something about the cow's expression that reminded her of him. The smell from the chocolatiers made her mouth water and Tommy took pity on her and bought her a sample.
"You can eat them while you enjoy your bath tonight," he said as he handed her the bag. He had never had an ambition to be a chocolate until that moment. He shook his head at the thought.
Every second shop seemed to sell chocolates or watches. Barbara was intrigued by the number of cuckoo clocks in one store and jumped when it struck noon and all the clocks started to chime and crow. Tommy laughed so hard that it became infectious. They had to race from the shop and stand outside with hands on their knees to recover their breath. Tommy wanted to hug her and spin her around. He had known he loved her but being with her now, away from London, he knew he fallen utterly and hopelessly in love with her.
They continued down the street and Barbara admired a silver watch that was far too fancy for her wrist. She did the conversion to sterling in her head and whistled. "Do people really pay over two thousand pounds for a watch?"
Tommy looked at her. "Yes but if it's in the window it's one of the cheaper ones. It's a very good brand."
"It'd want to be. I'd be scared to wear it."
They continued along the street until Barbara's stomach growled loudly. "Sorry," she said with obvious embarrassment.
"There used to be a place down here that had excellent schnitzels," Tommy informed her, "with chips."
"Sounds good."
The entrance was through a narrow timber archway and up a flight of stone steps. Barbara feared it would be a dark and dismal place but was surprised to find a lively pub lined with polished pine boards decorated with bright photos of local scenes. The place was crowded with festival visitors but they were shown to a quiet table near the window. Ever the gentleman Tommy pulled back the chair facing the window so Barbara could enjoy the view. She admired the way that the pub had placed smaller tables for single diners looking out at the view of the mountains. She knew from experience most restaurants made solo diners feel like lonely losers but here there was understanding and respect. She liked Switzerland.
"We used to eat here when I came skiing in my younger years. It seems such a long time ago now," Tommy said wistfully.
"Time goes too fast. We've been partners for almost a decade and no one thought we'd make it through ten days."
Tommy caught her eye. "Neither did I at first but it's been the most important partnership of my life." Barbara was looking at him but he could not sense if she understood his real meaning. For emphasis he reached out and quickly squeezed her hand. As if on cue Barbara's stomach growled loudly and another intimate moment was lost. Tommy smiled ruefully, "I think we had better feed you."
Barbara thanked her stomach. She had to avoid his eyes at all costs or she knew her own would betray her. They were good friends, partners; she could not endanger that with some adolescent infatuation, not after ten years together, no matter how much she wanted it.
They ordered then Tommy asked for a jug of a beer she had never heard of, assuring Barbara she would like it. It went well with the food and Barbara made Tommy laugh when she kept praising the crunchiness of the chips while they chatted about the house, the wedding and William. It was safe ground and they both fell into their regular patterns of banter and conversation.
"Tommi! Barb-ara!" They turned to see the three men from the train coming towards them.
"Great," Tommy groaned but Barbara smiled at them.
"Matthias, Jens, Dirk, good see you again."
Barbara's enthusiasm rankled Tommy but he stood and politely shook their hands. The men invited them over to their table where the men had met up with some other alpenhorners. The group was lively and talked about folk music and places they had travelled. Barbara was clearly intrigued and was far too friendly with them for Tommy's taste. He had invited her here, he was her friend and it was him he wanted her to fall in love with, not some yodeling horn player!
His sullenness was not lost on Barbara. She moved so she was sitting next to him and made extra effort to include him until his mood improved dramatically. She wondered why he felt so insecure. No one would ever replace him in her affections but she guessed he had no way of knowing that. She had an urge to stroke his head or hug him so that he knew. Instead she just looked at him, smiled and tried not to blush.
"You haf plans for tomorrow?" Matthias asked.
"I thought we might go up to Klein Matterhorn to show Barbara the ice cave," Tommy replied.
"Ja good but if you then come to Gornergrat on the train ve are playing at four. Over one hundred horns. It is quite a sight."
Barbara looked at Tommy and he could tell she was keen. "That sounds good. We will catch the afternoon train." He tried to sound eager but he could see she had seen straight through him. He was rewarded with a smile from Barbara but his mood darkened as he wondered if it was the mountain or the men she was more interested in. The afternoon was not going as he had planned. He ordered more beer and proceeded to drink far too much, too fast.
Barbara was watching him. She had enjoyed the afternoon but now Tommy was starting to become a little belligerent. It was time to go. "Will you walk me back by the river?"
Tommy was surprised. He looked at his watch. They could stay another half hour and still make dinner. He was buoyed by the idea that she wanted to spend time alone with him. "Of course."
The narrow river was more of a canal with rock lined walls. The grey water sped through at exhilarating rates. They sauntered silently along the path and stopped at the bridge that led across to the other side of the village. The sun had begun to disappear behind the mountains leaving a warm, buttery dusk. "I understand why you like Zermatt," she said as she rested her arms on the metal railing and studied the water.
Tommy tried to clear his head as he stood beside her. He had drunk just a little too much and he was afraid he would mess this up. "It is special. That's why I wanted to show you." She turned her head to look at him and neither tried to avoid the other's eyes. It was an intense moment where conversations were taking place without words. Now was his moment and while he regretted not being completely sober he was also aware it had given him Dutch courage. Tommy lent closer to her. He was finally going to kiss her and it was just as he wanted, love and not lust. "It's special and so are..."
"There you two are."
Tommy spun around to see William walking across the bridge. Never in his life had he wanted to throw a man from a bridge as much as he did now. "William," he said tightly.
William started chatting and the trio started to walk back to their chalet. Another moment lost and Tommy was starting to believe he would never get to tell Barbara how he felt. At least she had seemed to respond to his overture. Her eyes had told him she wanted him but that she was scared and unsure if this was what they should do. He was more sure. In fact he had never been more sure of anything in his life.
Barbara had seen the desire in his eyes. It had thrilled her much more than she had dreamed but she could not be sure it was not just the romance of the mountains. Would he want me if we were in London? If he had, why wait? They had been together alone often enough away from work. She sighed, he was a passionate man with a weakness for women and his desires had been a product of the moment. Still, she could dream.
Dinner was far more simple than Barbara had expected and she was soon able to relax and not feel an outsider. William was an interesting man having spent many years travelling the world in the Royal Navy. His tales about exotic ports filled the conversation. They sat around after the meal before Judith excused herself. William followed five minutes later. "Subtle they are not," Daze said grinning.
Barbara was not sure how to react. If she excused herself and then Tommy went quickly to avoid being with his mother, Daze might think the same of them. She blushed and looked questioningly at Tommy.
He understood her dilemma. He would not want his mother thinking that either, at least until it were true. "Barbara, would you like me to light your fire?"
Oh God! You already have! She knew she was blushing but in the soft light she doubted anyone would notice. "Yes, that would be nice. That tub is too tempting."
Yes, far too tempting! "Excuse us Mother. I'll be back shortly and we can discuss repairing the west windows."
He walked as close as he dared as they went up the stairs. He was quite sober now and aware that now was not the time irrespective of how much he wanted it to be. There was always tomorrow on Gornergrat. A mountaintop seemed a fitting place for a first kiss. Tommy ran her bath and then lit the methanol fire. "It will be safe to run all night if you like but you can turn it off here."
As Tommy walked to the door Barbara understood that he had no intention of pursuing his earlier goal. Perhaps she had just imagined it after all. "Thank you Sir."
"What happened to Your Lordship?" he asked.
Barbara laughed. "It's hard to call someone filling your bath Your Lordship."
"Or Tommy?"
"Sorry, that was unintended."
He smiled and her legs went weak. He bent down and kissed her softly on the cheek. "Enjoy your bath. Sweet dreams," he whispered before he slipped out the door and pulled it closed.
"Good night Tommy," she said softly to the door when she thought he had left.
"Goodnight Barbara."
