"Yo, Carter! Why do you look like your dog died?"

John looked up from his slumped position next to Susan's locker at the sound of his friend's voice. He attempted a weak smile, but was fully aware that she could see right through it. He shrugged, not bothering with a verbal response; he knew that she already knew the answer to that one.

"Moping isn't going to help you, you know," she told him, concentrating on her locker combination.

"Ironically enough, it seems to be doing the trick for me at the moment."

Susan smiled at him sympathetically, managing to yank open her locker door at the same time. She shoved in the books she wouldn't need for the weekend, then slammed the door shut, pressing her palms against it for a few moments, almost as if she was afraid the books would try to break out of their confinement. "Well, are you ready to get out of here, or would you rather do your sulking at school?"

"No, I prefer doing the bulk of it in private, thanks." With that, the pair pushed their way into the crush of students heading for the doors, all eager to begin their weekend. They'd only manage to go a few feet when John froze in his tracks, his eyes going wide, his jaw slackening, his face paling slightly.

"What? What happened?" Susan asked, coming to a halt beside him, trying to locate the source of his horror. She cringed when her eyes came to rest on Abby, who at that moment in time was standing by her own locker, being greeted by Luka. She watched as the exchange student leaned down, pressed a kiss to her cheek, then slung his arm over her shoulders. Abby didn't return the gesture, but she didn't push him away, either. They soon disappeared into the flow of students, but Susan knew those few moments would be enough to haunt John for the rest of the weekend.

John remained frozen, horrified at what he'd seen. "What...how...what the hell was that?" Susan remained silent. "Susan...what was that?"

She sighed, though wasn't sure if it was in frustration or sympathy. "John, don't-"

"What's going on with them?" he demanded, finally turning his head to look at his friend. "What's going on?"

Susan was a bit alarmed at the steady rise of panic in his voice, and wondered briefly if he was going to get hysterical. "Seriously. Don't. I told you, I'm not getting in the middle of this. It's not my place, and I don't need the added drama."

"But..."

"No 'buts.' If you want to know, you have to ask her yourself. Now get your ass in gear." With that, she grabbed his arm and started dragging him along.

He managed to snap himself out of his stupor enough to walk unassisted, but couldn't stop himself from asking, "Well, can you at least tell me how long this has been going on?"

Susan hesistated, not wanting to answer--not because she didn't want to get involved, but more because she didn't want to hurt him further.

"Susan, please."

"About three weeks," she finally mumbled.

"Three weeks!" he yelped, drawing a few looks from the few other students still left in the hallway. "Three...wha..."

"What did you expect, John? She couldn't exactly wait for you forever, you know. And it's not really fair of you to expect that she would."

"I didn't expect her to wait forever...I just didn't think she'd move on so quickly."

She felt for her friend. She'd never been through his situation before, but she knew that he was hurting. As a result, it made her hurt. And she really wanted her friend to not be in pain. "Well, if it makes any difference to you, Luka's the one who did the asking."

"I don't blame him, really, for asking her out. Any guy would be nuts to not want to spend time with her-"

"So, I guess that makes you certifiable."

He ignored her, continuing with his train of thought. "I just can't believe she would so readily accept. I mean...I can't imagine being with anyone else."

They finally reached the main doors, and Susan remained silent as they made their way into the parking lot and piled into his car, beginning the journey to his house. It was several miles before she spoke up again. "You hurt her," she said softly.

"What?"

"You hurt her! You hurt her a lot. Even if she does feel the same way about you, she's not going to admit it. No one would. You can't fault her for attempting to move on."

"I don't fault her for it."

"Well, it sure sounds like you do from over here."

"Look, logically, I know that what I did was dumb, and I have no right to think that she'd be willing to forgive me or wait around for me to get my head on straight, especially since I didn't give her a reason to think it wasn't on straight to begin with. Aside from dumping her out of the blue," he corrected hastily, stopping Susan before she could add anything. "I know all of this. But that doesn't mean I can stop my heart from wishing she would. My heart keeps hoping that it's all some big mistake or a dream, and that everything will right itself in the morning. I know this can't happen, but my heart just doesn't care. I don't think anyone's heart has ever been accused of listening to logic."

The car was silent for a few minutes. "I don't want you to think that I'm not sympathetic towards you. I know that you're going through a rough time right now, what with having extreme lapses in judgment in which you become an ass...I am. I care, and I worry about you, and I want you to be happy. At the same time, I'm having a really hard time not leaning more toward Abby's side of all this because she's pretty much the victim here. I know that your intentions for breaking up with her were good, and I understand that you were scared, and I can't say I blame you, but she's the one who was hurt without any explanations."

"I don't blame you. It's not like I came out of this thing smelling like a rose. I'm on her side, too."

"That's good to know."

"I just...I wish I could figure out some way to get her back, you know? It didn't take me too long to realize that, as scary as it is to be in love with her, the thought of just being without her scares me a whole hell of a lot more. It would have been nice if that occured to me before I got I stupid." He sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I need her." He gave his friend a lopsided grin. "Kinda pathetic, right?"

Susan shrugged. "Not in my book. I think you're very lucky to have found someone you love so much this early in life. And I believe it's real. I don't think it's the normal teenager love-of-the-week thing."

"I've gotta figure something out. Not having her around is killing me. Even if she won't take me back...well, I'd rather be in her life as a friend than nothing at all. If I can't be her boyfriend..."

"I know. You'll work it out. It's just gonna take some time. She needs to heal first."

"I guess a month and a half isn't enough time to heal, right?"

"Well, I suppose it depends on the hurt, but in girl world...six weeks is no where near enough time for wounds to heal."

"And this was a pretty big hurt."

"Oh, indeed it was."

John just sighed, but remained silent until he pulled up in front of Susan's house. "You sure I can't convince you to help me get her back? Not even to put in a good word for me?"

"No. I'll listen, I'll talk, whatever, but I'm not gonna be a go-between. All she knows is that you're upset that she's hurt. That's it. I can't fix your relationship for you."

He hit his head against the steering wheel a few times, hard enough so that Susan worried a bit about setting off the airbags. "Why do I suck so much?"

"It's a guy thing. You can't really help it."

"That's comforting."

"I'm just being honest. Guys, as a general population, are dumb. They do dumb things. I think it's genetic."

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure. I just can't promise you an answer."

"Do you think that if I asked her to the winter dance, she'd say yes?"

"Doubt it."

"And thank you for crushing my spirit entirely."

Susan rolled her eyes. "I'm not trying to hurt you. She just..." she clamped her mouth shut, not sure if she should go on.

"'She just' what?"

She heaved a big sigh, figuring it'd be better if he heard it from her than from someone else. "She already has a date. With Luka."

John hit his head on the wheel again. "I hate my life."

Susan remained silent for a moment, trying to think of something to help. "Wait!" she exclaimed, her eyes lighting up. "What about that New Year's party you're having at your house?"

"Well, I'm not really having it. It's more something that my parents and grandparents are doing--"

"Yeah, I get that, but didn't you tell me that they said you could have some people over?"

"Yeah, so?"

"Soooo...invite her."

"Well, I thought that was a given."

"It's better than nothing, isn't it? You'll be able to interact with her at least."

"Provided Luka's not hanging all over her."

"Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Be bitter and hostile. You don't know the guy, so don't be an ass about it. You can't take this out on him."

"I know, I know," he moaned. "I'm just so frustrated!"

"I see that." She bit her lip in thought, trying to quickly settle an internal debate. "Look...I'll help you out."

John's head snapped toward her so quickly he almost go whiplash. "What?"

"Not a lot of help but...you're gonna need help setting up the party, right? I'll try to get her there early so you can talk to her."

He shook his head sadly. "She won't go for it, Sus. Why on earth would she voluntarily spend time with me like that?"

"Hmmm. Valid point. Fine. This is what I'll do, if you can manage to hold out until then, and provided no progress has been made between the two of you in the next couple of weeks--"

"No progress will be made," John interrupted. "We're gonna be out for winter break soon, so the chances of me seeing her in a context other than school are slim."

"Will you stop talking for a minute? Unless you don't want my help..."

"Shutting up, ma'am."

"Thank you. Anyway, Abby and Luka are there together and they're spending a lot of time in each other's company, I'll find some way to distract him so that he won't come looking for her, and then you can have a few minutes with her alone."

"Distract him how?"

"Well, I won't be flashing him or anything, but I'l figure something out."

"And you really think a party is the best place to do this?"

"What other choice do you have? She won't talk to you at school, she'll hang up on you if you call, she'll slam the door in your face if you show up at her house. If you talk to her at a party, there's less chance of a scene being made. She's not one for being a drama queen, so she's not going to want to draw the kind of attention that a fight would bring. It's your best shot at just getting her to listen to what you have to say."

"How do we even know she'll come to my party?"

"I'll get her there. It'll be good for her; I'm sure she'll have fun. And if she doesn't show up, well...we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. Now, remember; this is a one time thing. I know it's not much, but it's as much in the middle as I'm willing to get, okay? If she gets pissed off at you for cornering her, then it's not my fault."

"I'm not gonna corner her. Well, not much. I just want to talk to her. Just for a couple of minutes."

"Looks like you might get your wish, then," Susan said, grabbing her bookbag so she could finally exit the car.

"Yeah, there is a Santa Claus after all."

"Ho ho ho!"

"Don't call yourself names, Lewis. You should have more self-confidence than that."

She grabbed a pen and threw it at his head. "You know, I think I like you better when you're sulking; you don't insult me nearly as much."

"This is just a temporary thing. My spirits are momentarily lifted. I'm sure that in hour or two, I'll be back down in the dumps."

"Well, I'll keep my fingers crossed for you," she answered, dashing out of the car and into her house, leaving him to wonder if he'd just been insulted, or she was actually holding out hope for him. He shrugged, his mind not having enough space to figure it out at the moment. He shifted the car into drive, feeling positive for the first time in weeks. It seemed there might be a light at the end of the tunnel. At the moment, the light was very small, but it was something. It was something he could grab onto, something to give him hope for his future with Abby.

So, how much do I suck? A lot, I'd have to say. I'm sorry this took so long. It took way too long. Truthfully, I'm not sure this one was worth the wait. I guess I'll let you guys judge that but...yeah, sorry I suck. I just got stuck. I had no idea what to do or how to do it...my mind was just an absolute blank with this for a while. I'm hoping the next part will be out sooner; I'm pretty excited about the next couple of chapter. C-dawg...you'll be happy to know that I'm going straight to the part we discussed. There's not going to be another chapter between here and there. Satisfied? ;) Anyway, please don't hate me because this took so long. And Alex...still miss you, my love.