Day 7

Dear Journal,

I'm really tired.. Luckily, since I threw up yesterday (even though it wasnt due to sickness), Ace was able to convince the teacher's -over the phone- that I really was sick, soooo I got school off today. Ace got to skip school too, 'cause the teachers know that my parents are rarely around to take care of me while I'm sick, so Ace got the O.K. to stay home. He keeps on saying sorry to me, like he did something wrong. But... he didn't. I'm really confused, and I've been thinking about it all morning.. that's probably why I'm so tired. That makes sense, doesn't it?

So here I am, sitting on the couch next to Ace again.. bored out of my mind. Well.. I was sitting next to Ace, but he keeps scooting away. I'm gettin' real tired of this shit, 'cause him confessing his love to me doesn't mean he should continue avoiding me. There's nothing to be avoiding me for! Maybe he thinks I hate him, or something. I mean, I don't hate him at all, but who knows what else goes on in his head..

But.. I don't know if I love him either. Of course, I love him as a brother, but... I mean, he is and was always there for me, and helped me through so much stuff. And he makes me happy... andddd he's.. uhh.. handsome? is that the word I wanna use? *facepalm* 'cute' would be like calling him a kid, but 'hot' sounds like I'm a teenage girl. And yet 'handsome' makes me sound like Mom! x_x

Oh god, he keeps looking over at my journal, like I'm writing hate-letters to him or something. Wait, no.. it's more like he's just mildly nervous but curious at the same time.. hmm... gah! shi


Ace stole my journal. So I'm writing on a piece of paper I had shoved in my pocket. It's so awkward right now.. both of us reading/writing and glancing at each other over the paper every once and a while, in complete silence. Oh my god... he's gonna know everything now! That journal was for me and me only! And my only friend that I could tell anything and everything to without having to worry about being gossiped about or judged. I'm really worried that Ace is going to feel hurt after reading that I didn't know how I felt about him.. Luffy, you idiot. I need to make up my mind about him, and quick. Okay.. I'm gonna make a list of good things about Ace, that make me happy.

Okay... He's tall. Wow, Luffy.. realllll nice.
Ace protects me..
He's pretty much like my 3rd parent, but way less annoying.
He's honest with me. Like, if I make a bad decision, he'll tell me that I was being an idiot. ahahaha!
Ace helps me out with homework, which is really awesome since I hate homework.
I can rant on and on to him about anything, and he won't complain at all..
When I'm sad, I can always talk to him about it, since he is always there for me.
He's funny and makes me laugh, and always knows what to say to me, no matter what is going on.

But... all that has kinda changed now that I found out about him loving me. God damnit, I should've knocked. *Sigh* I have to tell him how I feel... so... when I'm ready, I'm gonna write Ace a letter, and hopefully it'll be a love-letter.

Still thinking deep thoughts,
Monkey D. Luffy...