All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer
My dream last night had been disturbing. I had dreamt that I was in great trouble and Edward was trying to save me. He had searched and searched but something was stopping keeping him from finding me. I felt so lost and alone. All I wanted to do was hold him, and feel his arms securely around me. At one point in the night I had woken in a cold sweat breathing heavily. It had felt so real…but what did it mean? What was it about him that made me feel protected? Never had I felt so safe, as I had imagining myself in his arms.
I was on edge all morning anxiously waiting to see Edward again. I wondered, worriedly, if he would be true to his word and keep my secret. I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I completely forgot my truck was still at the hospital, until I walked out the front door and found it missing.
"Shoot." I grumbled as I slammed the door shut behind me, heading for the phone. Now I would have to call Charlie for a ride. I would be late for sure.
Grumbling, I made my way to the phone on the wall in the kitchen. Just as I was about to dial the number a soft knock came to the front door.
Confused, I hung the phone up and went to the door. I openly gaped at the person I found standing there. There on my doorstep stood Edward Cullen in all his glory.
"Good morning." He muttered as he tried to hide his smile. His eyes danced with mirth.
I stood in front of him frozen. I blinked my eyes a few times confused as to why he was at my house. He was waiting for me to speak, but I couldn't seem to find words. I watched as his face fell slightly and his eyes became worried.
"Or…maybe not. Are you feeling ok?" He questioned with raised eyebrows.
I blushed deep red and looked away. "What are you doing here?" I hedged not wanting to talk about anything that could lead back to my illness.
"I thought you might need a ride." He answered smoothly.
I peered around him to find his silver Volvo parked in the driveway. I looked up at him again and smiled warily, "Thanks."
He grinned and led me to his car. As before he opened my door for me before taking his place in the drivers seat.
It was quiet for the first few minutes. I nervously nibbled on my lower lip not sure of what to say. I thought back to my dream and blushed as I remembered how much I had needed him then. This was not good. We could only be friends, even if by some miracle he wanted more, it just could never be. It was just a dream after all, nothing more.
"You never did tell me why you moved here." He asked suddenly breaking the silence.
"What?" I asked distractedly as I looked over at him.
He chuckled softly. "Why did you move to Forks, you never told me."
"Oh. Uh…it's complicated."
"I think I can keep up." He pressed.
I sighed. This was not a conversation I was willing to have at the moment. I could just give him the same answer I had given to everyone else, but it felt wrong somehow. I didn't want to lie to him, but I didn't trust him enough with the truth.
"You don't have to tell me if you would rather not." He explained after a few minutes. I could clearly hear the curiosity in his voice. He wanted to know, but he seemed willing to wait until I was ready.
I contemplated telling him my real reasons for moving. He somehow already knew I was sick, did it really matter if he knew the whole story? It might feel good to have someone who knew…not just what I was willing to share…but everything.
"It's not that exactly." I hedged. I looked down at my hands as I played with a strand of my hair. "Maybe when I'm ready." I whispered.
"I'll be here." He promised.
I looked up at him and saw the sincerity in his eyes. I smiled weakly in return and our eyes held. A strange new energy seemed to fill the air around us as we stared unrelentingly into each other's eyes. Time seemed to hold still as the silence intensified between us. My hands started to shake and I could feel myself becoming light headed. I didn't know what was happening, I only knew there was no way I could look away. As my head started to spin I realized I wasn't breathing and I gasped for air breaking our contact.
"We need to get going or we'll be late." He explained in a low voice.
A light rose crossed my cheeks as I nodded in reply. I had been so lost in his eyes that I hadn't even realized we were at school. As soon as I stepped outside I felt many eyes on me. I looked around to find people gawking and whispering as they watched Edward come to my side. I looked down blushing a deep crimson red and hid behind my hair.
"Come on." Edward urged gently leading me to my first class.
I kept my head down and remained silent as we came to a stop at the door to my first class. I turned to say a quick goodbye to Edward and was shocked by what I saw. His face seemed torn, and his brow was furrowed. Timidly, he reached up and brushed my hair away from my face and behind my ear. He smiled turning on his heal and disappearing around the corner leaving me speechless. I stood motionlessly staring after him as my classmates passed me to enter the classroom. I jumped at the sound of the first bell and darted inside blushing as I sat down at my desk.
My morning passed by rather quickly. I received a few strange looks from some of the students, but no one had approached me. My luck was soon to run out. There standing in front of the door to my math class stood Jessica. She smiled widely once she saw me and waved. I tensed. In my short time here I had quickly learned that she was the school gossip. I groaned inwardly, knowing what she probably wanted.
"Hey Bella. How are you today?" She asked knowingly.
"I'm fine, Jessica thanks." I answered politely not bothering to stop and chat. She quickly caught up to me and took her seat next to me.
"Did you have a good morning?" She fished.
"It was ok."
"Anything special happen?"
"No." I replied quickly. Her face fell and I could see the curiosity burning in her eyes.
"I didn't see your truck in the parking lot today." She hedged. "How did you get to school?"
"I got a ride with a friend." I simply muttered. Surely I could call Edward a friend by now.
"With who? Do I know them?"
I sighed. She was relentless. "Edward Cullen."
Her eyes lit up upon my confession and a huge smile spread across her face. "Tell me everything."
"There's nothing to tell Jess. I needed a ride and he gave me one. End of story."
She narrowed her eyes incredulously and pursed her lips. "How did he know you needed a ride? Did you call him or something?"
"No. I did not call him." I looked up searching for the teacher, but he was late. Of all the days to be late!
"Then how did he know to come get you?" She persisted.
"He just did Jess, ok?"
She sighed defeated. Suddenly a wide smile spread across her face and her eyes lit up again. "Do you think he likes you?"
I blushed at her question. No. I did not think Edward Cullen liked me. But I feared I might like him, or at least need him, more than I should.
"No. We're just friends."
"I've never seen Edward Cullen be just friends with anyone before you." She stated suggestively.
I blushed again. "He's nice." I qualified hoping that would be enough to stop her interrogation.
"Nice? That's all you have to say? Are you blind Bella? He's gorgeous!"
My blush deepened and she smiled knowingly at me. "Do you like him?"
I sighed annoyed. "Yes." I whispered curtly. I could feel the blush on my cheeks spread down my neck.
"How much do you like him?" She asked triumphantly.
Thankfully, the teacher had finally arrived. "It doesn't matter how I feel about him. We can never be more than just friends." I whispered as the teacher began his lesson.
She frowned and looked confused but mercifully, she did not pursue the topic further. I kept my eyes forward for the rest of class. As soon as the bell rang I jumped from my seat and raced from the room. I did not want to get trapped by Jessica's questions again.
I didn't feel like going to lunch to endure the whispering and staring again. I was tired and just wanted to rest. I didn't have my truck so I decided to go to the gym and lay down on the mats there. I had an apple in my bag I could eat.
I found a semi-clean mat in the weight room, and laid down using my bag as a pillow, and my jacket as a blanket. I closed my eyes enjoying the warmth of the room. I didn't know what to do about Edward. For some reason I seemed to be drawn to him. I needed him more than I liked to admit. There was something about him, I couldn't quite place, that made him different than anyone I had ever met. Though I was scared to trust him, instinctively I knew I could—that of everyone I had ever met—he was the most trustworthy of all.
It didn't matter really. In a few months time I would soon be too sick for school, and would never see him again. One solitary tear fell down my cheek, as I thought of never seeing his beautiful smile again. He was my guardian angel.
"Bella?"
I gasped as my eyes flew open. I blushed as I wiped at my face erasing all my tears. I was so distracted that I hadn't heard the door open. Before me stood a very anxious looking Edward.
"Yes?" I asked.
"Are you ok?" He asked as he came to kneel down in front of me.
"Yeah. I'm great." I blushed.
He stared at me skeptically for a short moment. "Why aren't you at lunch?"
I shrugged. "I have an apple. It's no big deal."
He frowned disapprovingly. "Bella, you need to eat more than just an apple. Let me buy you lunch."
I sighed. "I have money Edward. I can buy my own lunch."
He smiled. "Let's go then." He got up and offered me his hand.
I bit my lip nervously. There's nothing I wanted more than to grab his hand and have lunch with him, but I didn't want to face everyone. I wanted to be alone.
I shook my head gently. "You go. I'd rather be alone right now."
He narrowed his eyes and his face became calculating. "Fine. Then I shall bring lunch to you."
Before I could protest he was gone. I sat bewildered as I awaited his return. Why was he so concerned? Why did he care so much if I ate or not? My head was spinning as I tried to understand the mystery that was Edward Cullen. Just days ago he had treated me as a pariah, and now I was his new best friend.
Edward returned faster than seemed possible with a tray full of food. He smiled as he sat down next to me on the mat.
"You didn't get all this for me did you?" There was more food that I could have eaten in an entire day.
He shrugged. "I didn't know what you would like." He explained innocently. "Now eat, please."
I sighed in defeat grabbing some french fries and dipping them into ketchup. The most beautiful crooked smile spread across his face I chewed my food.
"How has your morning been?" He asked conversationally.
I shrugged as I took a sip of the coke he had gotten for me. He watched me eat for a few minutes in silence. I felt a little self-conscious and was about to ask something, but I was cut off.
"Tell me what you're thinking?"
I was startled by his question. I looked up into his eyes and was caught off guard by their intensity, and blurted out the first thing that crossed my mind. "I was wondering why you were being so nice to me all of a sudden."
"Is it a crime to be nice to someone?" He asked lightly.
"No. But you haven't always been this friendly towards me. I was just wondering what changed?"
He pursed his lips, "I'm sorry about that."
I put a few more fries in my mouth waiting for him to explain more.
"You never answered my question." I pressed.
He sighed. His icy sweet breath fanned out across my face making my head swirl. It smelt so good, I wanted more. I wanted to lean in and taste it. I shook my head as I cleared it blushing slightly.
"I'm not the best friend for you Bella." He stated seriously. "If you're smart you'll avoid me."
I chose to ignore his warning, and focused what else he had said. "So we're friends then?"
He grinned, and his eyes twinkled wildly. "I suppose we can try. But I'm warning you I'm not a good friend for you. It might be healthier for you if we weren't." He smiled lightly, but I could see the seriousness in his eyes.
I scoffed taking him off guard. "Like I'm that worried about my health." I mumbled.
"You should be." He cried harshly.
I stared at him wide eyes as I felt my eyes tear up. I looked away quickly hiding my face from him.
"I'm sorry." He whispered. I could hear the genuine regret in his tone. Instinctively, I knew he was saying sorry for more than just his harsh words.
"If only you knew." I barely said above a whisper. It remained quiet between us for a few minutes. Carefully, I turned to look at him and saw that he was looking at me with sad eyes. He smiled at me, and I smiled back warily.
He reached out and slowly tucked a small strand of my hair behind my ear. "If I only knew what?" He asked gently.
I looked into his eyes and could see only caring and concern there. I wanted to tell him, but was it right to burden him in that way? He seemed to have kept quiet about what happened in the hospital the previous night. I could trust him right?
I opened my mouth to speak just as the bell ending lunch rang. I closed my mouth and looked away. I swallowed hard fighting with the decision. I got up gathering my things as I walked towards the door.
I turned to find Edward right behind me. "Later." I promised.
He nodded his head in return, "Later then."
I walked to class slowly dreading the end of the day. I knew he was not going to let this one go. I needed to figure out how much I was willing to tell him.
