To the five people who emailed me.
ARE YOU HAPPY NOW!!?
Now on with the show!
Arnold gulped down the Mountain Dew in one sip.
"Lock and load!" I said Coolly as I grasped my SIG around the handle. Todd Checked the door. Peering around the other room through the crack before turning around and giving a thumbs up. Arnold went through first, and then giving the "Go" sign with his left hand. We all went through and… and… proceeded up the seventy-five flights of stairs. Jeez, you would really think they would have an elevator in this place.
The hacker slumped back in his chair and lifted his feet up onto the desk. Then shortly opening a can of beer with a loud fizz. The boss burped. But suddenly…
"Sir!" Said The hacker in shock as he bolted up from his chair, spilling his cool bear all over the floor. "They… They…"
The boss got up.
"What?" He asked impatiently. "Spit it out!"
The hacker spat onto the floor. "They are still alive!"
"What!?"
"I know! I'm shocked too! I mean… I'm sure the chick would have survived because she's a women and she can take that crap. But yet here they are! They would have blown their brains out in the first fifteen minutes! It's just not possible!"
"Well… It is possible because they are not only alive but they are now halfway up the unrealistically deep basement with no elevator. Man I 'm just glad I didn't install that. Waste of money."
"An elevator is a waste of money?"
"Yeah I used all of the elevator money in the thug lounge to buy every single videogame over steam on my mega awesome super computer I stole from NASA five years ago!"
"Oh you were thinking ahead!"
"Yeah your damn right boy. Now activate the Laser grid and make em burst to pieces like that girl who walked through the laser grid in the first resident evil movie!"
There was silence.
"We don't have a laser grid sir."
"Then Set the electric fence from stun to kill!"
"We don't have an electric fence."
"Then send down the drug addicts to tear them apart!"
"They all died when you wanted to test the effects of Sam Fisher movements on the human body."
"Then send down the blood hounds."
"They all died along with the drug addicts!"
"Then fill the basement with gasoline!"
"Sir not only will that cost more than two trips to the movie theater but then we'll all die from the fumes and if there's a spark this place and half the region will go up faster than the ratings on that Canadian Cartoon Network when they showed a pair of breasts at 3:00 sometime in the 1990's!
…
…
"You know I'm fresh Out of Ideas, lets just shoot them when they reach the top floor.
The hacker pulled out a Glock 39 and the boss upholstered a .500 S&W special. "We'll shoot them full of so much lead it will take a 80 ton crane to lower their caskets into their graves!". The door behind them started to rattle. The two of them turned just in time to see Arnolds Fist smash through the leetile mon door. "OH CRAP YOU SAID THE BASMENT DOOR WAS DOWN THE HALL!!".
"JUST BECAUSE I'M A HACKER DOESN'T MEAN I KNOW EVERYTHING IN THIS MANOR!!" The hacker vaulted over the desk and ran down the hall. "GUY'S!! GET YOUR GUNS!! THE TERMINATOR'S GONNA KILL US ALL NOT UNLESS WE PUT UP A MEANINGLESS FIGHT!!". Suddenly, Dozens upon dozens of thugs armed with Armalites and Uzi's stormed the Manor and scrambled out of the halls and slammed out of the rooms. Low life thugs swarmed the front doors totting AK's and Berettas. Heavily armored thugs clambered out of the kitchen clutching high-powered automatic M4s and very expensive H&K weaponry. This is just a warning that there is gonna be AAAAAAAAAALLLOOOOOOTT of fighting.
"Wow I didn't know we had that much guys". The boss stumbled out of his room as gunfire from Arnolds Rifle riddled the door with holes and sent the room into a smoking cloud. The boss fired back into the mass hoping to hit at least something besides a piece of his furniture. "That guy was supposed to weaken and then finish them off!" screamed the boss in terror. "I need all the guys here at- Woah where the hell did you guys all come from!?". The boss paused for a second. "Well it doesn't matter! Just cap them! There are dozens of us and only four of them!" The boss bolted down the staircase with amazing speed for his fat build. "I'll be on the top floor! Do what you are paid to do and stop them!"
"But Boss, You don't pay us anyting!"
"Shut up and kill them!" The boss ran up the other stairs across the entrance hall with his hacker. The thugs aimed their iron sights at the door. A mountain Dew soda can was thrown out of the doorway and landed near a sofa and entertainment center. The thugs paid little attention to it. But suddenly… The can exploded! Nine thugs were sent through the air like rag doll's flapping their arms like mad! Arnold appeared, AK-47 in hand. He then ran along the railing, firing with precision accuracy! Which was then followed by the satisfying sound of bullet on skull on brains on blood on wall! The exchange of fire was deafening. Todd jumped out of the door way, followed by Donna and me. Todd helped Arnold with his suppression fire, Me and Donna scrambled down to the main level. Donna fired first at the Elite thugs, bad Idea.
"WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO AFTER THE STRONGEST FIRST!!?" I yelled.
"WHAT!!?" Donna yelled back.
Another can of Mountain Dew landed not far away from Donna, the same happened, except this time the carnage was twice as massive. Flaying bodies went through the air, bringing down the chandelier and sending sofa cushions, lamps, tiles, splinters, glass and the occasional shoe in all directions like a monsoon of debris'. In the confusion, Donna holstered her Beretta and picked up a 5.56 M4A1 assault riffle (Considered to be one of the best assault rifles in the world). And along with that she picked a few 40MM grenades off one of the elite in the fray of dust and destruction.
"WHERE ARE YOU GOING!!" Yelled Todd as he unloaded his entire clip into the mass of thugs, 19 fell to the floor.
"WE'LL TAKE FATASS!!" I yelled. "YOU TAKE THE REST!! THEN FOLLOW US!!" Arnold pumped his Benelli M4 super 90 he snatched from a fallen thug and with one blast, he took down the other chandelier, the mass of brass and steel crushed seventeen thugs into pulp. Donna scrambled up the staircase, I followed. Donna crouched when she entered the door the hacker and fatass went through. Ten thugs rushed us, Me and Donna showed them that running at your armed enemies was bad idea. But I also guess it was a bad Idea firing a gun right next to her ear, she proudly returned the favor, I sad a word that I had to ban ten children for saying on the forum (CRAP THAT'S LOUD!!). I then realized, That was stupid… But aren't we killing dozens of people over a case of coke? Maybe I should have-"
"HOLD IT RIGHT THERE FATASS!!" Donna yelled. The Hacker raised his weapon, but realized her gun was bigger so he dropped it.
"Never mind! Gotta drink coke after I shoot fatman!" I shot the fatman in the spleen. He put the lords name in vain and landed on his large gun, it discharged, blowing a large hole where his kidneys would be.
"Well this certainly blows." Uttered the fatman unusually calm. Todd and Arnold ended their massacre and joined us. I grabbed the fatman by the collar.
"WHERE IS OUR COKE!!?" I yelled in fury. The fatman mumbled something, but then reached for his pocket. It was another setback, An I.O.U card was firm in the fatmans hand.
"What is this!?" I Asked firmly. The fatman sat up.
"He came and went ten minutes ago. He took the case."
I stared at Donna, she stared back. "Who?"
"I'm not the boss, Everyone just calls me boss because I own this place. My boss, he isn't even the boss! He's just a guard!"
"What guard!? What does he guard?"
"We don't know his real name, but everyone just calls him "The Guard". He runs the gang fronts of L.A. The triads want him taken out, I assume they've sent you guys."
"We want to know what he guards! Not what he does!"
"He's a body guard. He's goes wherever D.D goes, Without D.D, nothing will flow, D.D runs The Guard, The Guard runs me, and I run the heists."
"Who's D.D? And what does The Guard want to do with our Coke?
"He…" The Boss stuttered. Blood burst from his mouth. "Before I go into that dark place I must say…
…
…
Say…
…
…
Spider Man 3 was completely mediocre."
"What?"
"It just wasn't what I expected. I mean I liked the first one and the second, but all the good stuff was played in the commercials. But the worst part was when Spiderman's chasing the bad guy, and then he just runs right infront of a monstrously large American flag waving in the wind."
"Oh yeah I didn't understand that either." Put in Donna.
"I mean I can understand if Spiderman was fighting The Russians or the Chinese or terrorists," Went on The Boss. "But he was just fighting another American, but not only that, he just had to run infront of an obnoxiously large American…"
"WHERE DID THE GUARD GO!!?" I Boomed at the top of my voice.
"I'm right here, you don't need to scream." The Boss passed Me a Fax Note.
The Guard has been sent to pick up the Case and deliver it to headquarters until further notice.
D.D. Head of Urban control. Fox Plaza.
P.s. Stop putting minutes on my Cell Phone! I haven't switched yet and that money doesn't come out of my account! It comes out of my money Jar! I need that money for hookers and Slim Jims!
"Fox Plaza? He's in the Fox building!?"
"Yeah, I was gonna ask him how he got there and also why the Guard came in, but he switched five minutes ago and the Guard left in such a hurry" The Boss died.
"GUUUOOD DAMMIT!!" I roared in anger.
"Man He just died so suddenly." Donna pointed out.
"Not that!" I shot. "Haven't you noticed!? Todd couldn't talk to the president of Chinatown because he left in such a hurry. The president couldn't talk to Arnold because he left in such a hurry. Arnold couldn't talk to Heroine Harry because he left in such a hurry. And the crew couldn't talk to The Boss because He left in such a hurry! Don't you see!?"
"People are very quick?"
"No! It's… Actually I think your right."
"We need to get our coke, it's strangely in even more danger than ever before!" Said Todd.
"But How are wee soopposed to geet into zee Fox Plaza?"
"Ummm…" stuttered Donna. She raised the S&W 500. Special. "Duh?"
Will the foursome breach Fox Plaza and get their Coke? Why is Fox in on the conspiracy? Will Grade 10 become even more horrible once exams roll by? Does…
Does anybody realize 120 people died over a case of coke?
…
…
Anyway…
TUNE IN NEXT EPISODE!!
