Spike had decided to stay behind in Rome while Angel flew back to L.A. to deal with the head problem.
He agonized over what to do, pacing and thinking outside of the Buffy's apartment. He finally made his decision.
He knocked on the door of Buffy's apartment. He had to see her, despite the fear it stuck in his heart. He ran his fingers through his hair as he waited. She deserved to know he was alive. He deserved to have her know he was alive.
Andrew opened the door and sighed. "Where's the other one? I assume he can't let go either."
Spike mumbled irritably, "He left. Just me."
"If you want to see her, you'll have to wait until tomorrow. She called to say she's spending the night at the Immortal's."
Spike growled and pushed pass Andrew. "Why would she pick him? Out of all the men, why the bloody hell did it have to be him!?"
Andrew dropped onto the couch. "Would you really be happy if it were some other guy? It still wouldn't be you."
Spike glared venomously at the boy, but the truth of his words couldn't be denied. "Shut up."
Spike slumped down beside him. "I tried to convince myself that it wasn't true what she said. That she only said it because I was dying. I tried, but... I couldn't help but think maybe... you know? Maybe she really loved me. Stupid, right? I don't deserve her."
Andrew rubbed Spike's shoulder. "Did you ever think that maybe she doesn't deserve you?"
Spike glanced at him sidelong. "How do you figure that?"
"You're a dashing, handsome, hero. You got your soul for her, and gave your life for her. You deserve someone who sees that, and not your past."
Spike tilted his head, and smiled crookedly at Andrew. "You think I'm a hero?"
"Cooler than Batman or Doctor Who."
"Thanks, but I'm no hero. Just a demon. Hell awaits me, and nothing will change that."
"Buffy still doesn't deserve you."
Spike chuckled and leaned back against the couch. "Even if that's so, it hurts not having her." Spike closed his eyes.
Andrew ran his fingers through Spike's hair, freezing when he realized what he was doing.
"Don't stop," Spike murmured, leaning into Andrew's warm hand.
Andrew continue to brush his fingers through Spike's hair.
Spike craved the simple show of affection after being so long without it. He found himself slipping into a light sleep, Andrew's touch never leaving.
Andrew bit his lip as he gazed at Spike's face. He looked sweet when he slept. Andrew remembered that. He remembered that he could be sweet, and gentle.
Andrew leaned over and brushed his lips over Spike's cheek. He knew that Spike would kill him for that. Their one time had been just that. One time. As much as Andrew wished it was different.
"You are a hero. To me you are," Andrew whispered.
Spike shifted in his sleep and leaned against Andrew, nuzzling into his chest.
Andrew kissed the top of his head. "My sweet hero."
"Trying to molest Spike in his sleep?" Buffy asked as she closed the front door quietly.
Andrew stared at her with wide eyed fear. "No!" he whispered loudly.
"Chill, I was joking... mostly."
"Why aren't you surprised about Spike being alive?"
"I've known about it for a while."
Andrew squinted. "Why didn't you go see him?"
Buffy sighed. "I moved on. I was hoping he would too. Leave it to Spike to do what I don't want him to. I'm going to bed. Night, Andrew."
He watched her disappear into her room. "You really don't deserve him."
Spike mumbled in his sleep and moved closer to the heat Andrew's warm body afforded him.
Andrew wrapped his arms around Spike and let him burrow in close. "Sleep well, Spike."
