Disclaimer:SM owns the characters
I am so sorry for the delay in updating, i have no internet connection at the moment. Thanks to my sister i am stealing her connection, i am hoping to come visit her once a week and update.
Messing up the Impossible
Sleep was not going to happen, I spent the next hour tossing and turning. My memories of my childhood were running through my brain on repeat, I hated having these memories, always reminding me of everything that I had lost.
Giving up on sleep I jumped out of my bedroom window and ran into the forest, pulling my cut-offs down and wrapping them around my ankle. I could sense Sam patrolling the Reservation but he was trying to keep his thoughts blank, so that I could be alone. I ran in the opposite direction from Sam, I stopped at the highway when I heard the recognisable sound of Bella Swan's truck. I turned around and slowly followed the truck towards the beach.
I phased back and slowly walked down to the beach; I stopped when I could hear her crying and quickly turned around and ran back into the forest. I sat down and leant against the tree and listened to her crying. There was a part of me that wanted to go to the beach and try to stop her from crying. But I knew that when it came to women and crying there was more chance that she would end up more upset.
Before I knew what I was doing I found myself walking towards her and sitting down next to her, I sat in silence listening to her as she tried to quiet her sobs.
"Are you ok?" I asked and then felt like slapping myself for asking such a stupid question.
"Not really" She replied before wiping away the tears on her face, while still staring out towards the sea.
"Want to talk about it?" I offered, what the hell was wrong with me? When did I become a shrink?
"Not really"
"Sure" I told her before looking out to sea.
"I went back to school today and some of the girls were calling me a black widow and told me to stay away from the all the boys in the school before I send them away too." She told me, almost whispering after we were sat there for a few minutes in silence.
"Why would they say that?" I asked confused that they would be like that.
"Because most the girls were after the Cullen boys before I moved back here and now they are blaming me for them all leaving." She explained while wrapping her arms around her chest.
"Does it really matter what other people think, you know the truth and the reasons they left." I told her while thinking that they left because once they sucked the life out of her and just left her blood, there was no reason why they should stay.
"They were telling the truth, I am to blame. If it was not for me they would still be here, and everybody would be happy." Bella whispered so low, that if it was not for my enhanced hearing I would not have heard her.
"People move on all the time Bella, sometimes it is a good thing that some people leave." Especially when it means that nobody else in the tribe could phase, I thought to myself.
"It doesn't mean that it is a good thing this time." Bella commented wrapping here arms around herself tighter.
I couldn't answer her, how could she still want them here after the shit the leeches are putting her through now. It is not normal; they have been gone over a week a now. When I felt myself grip the sand I realised that I was shaking and close to phasing, I closed my eyes and tried to think of things that could calm me down. It didn't work the only things going through my head was my parents and the leeches.
I stood up knowing that I had to get to the forest, before I totally lost it and revealed the secret. I don't know what made me what to do it, but I found myself bending over and lightly resting my hand on her shoulder. Like any normal person this caused Bella turn her head and look directly at me. I briefly looked at her face before looking directly into her chocolate brown eyes. I felt everything shift in my life, the pack, the tribe, nothing was as important as this person sat staring up at me.
"Are you ok?" I heard Bella ask, moments before I felt my legs give way and my butt hit the sand again.
"I'm fine Bella, just a bit shocked" I answered her before placing my head between my knees and silently cursing the spirits for forcing me to imprint on the only girl that is as messed up as I am.
"What are you shocked about?" Bella asked causing me to look up at her and back into those eyes.
"Something just happened, and I need to tell you all about it, I can't keep it from you."
I watched as Bella's eyes opened wide waiting for me to tell her what I was talking about, somewhere deep inside I knew that I was not supposed to tell her anything. But my heart was telling me that we cannot keep secrets from her, I could kick Sam's ass now for stopping Jared from sharing his first thoughts and feelings when he imprinted. Some clue that this shit was strong and weird would have been nice.
"I am a wolf and you are my imprint, which means that you are my soul mate." I blurted out before I could stop myself.
"What are you talking about?" Bella asked as she slowly stood up and took a step away from me.
"I am a wolf about the size of an over grown horse and my spirits have shown me that you are my imprint." I repeated again, before standing up and taking a small step closer to her.
"Is this all a joke Paul? Enjoy listening to me as I tell you what some people at school are saying. Then having a laugh yourself by telling me some crap about being a wolf and you being my soul mate. I know one thing; you are not my soul mate. He left me in the middle of the forest." Bella shouted out before turning around and running towards the car park.
I stood in shock unable to move, I could feel my wolf forcing its way out, wanting to chase after his imprint. What felt like minutes later but was only seconds my brain and body caught up with itself, and I started to run towards the car park.
I stopped on the edge and watched as Bella fumbled with her keys before unlocking the truck door and climbing in, I ran picking up my speed and stopped at the door before she was able to start the trucks engine.
"Bella I'm not joking with you, you need to believe me. I am telling you the truth, if you come with me I can take you to my friend's house. He is a wolf too and he can explain this shit better than I can." I shouted through the window.
I watched Bella hoping she would agree to coming with me, instead she started to shake her head before starting the engine and pulling out of the car park.
I watched as she drove further away from me, I could feel the distance between us in my chest and gripped it, trying to rip off the pressure that felt like I had a block of cement on my chest. I had to go see Sam and explain this shit, and that my imprint doesn't believe me or want me. As that thought entered my head my heart hurt and I could feel myself shaking, I ran into the forest and phased before I could take my cut-offs off.
I could sense that it was Jared who was on patrol; he read my thoughts and started to think of Kim his imprint.
"It is just shock Paul, when I told Kim she passed out and told me to stay away from her when she woke up."
"Yeah I remember, it hurts I can sense that she is too far away from me." I told him, hoping that he could give me some advice.
"You will get used to it after a while; Bella will also feel the pressure."
"Great so because of this shit, my imprint will also be in pain." I growled out.
"Sam and the Elders are going to kick your ass for telling her, without their permission." Jared then said trying to hide the amusement that I will be in trouble again for some shit.
"Well maybe if they told me what to expect, then I would have had more control over it." I growled out before phasing back just as I got to the tree line of the Sam's garden.
"Sam" I shouted out as I walked out the forest and headed towards the house.
Sam came running out of the door with his nostrils flared and looking along the tree line.
"There is no threat Sam, but something has happened." I shouted out and could see him relax as he stepped off the porch.
"Paul next time you have something to say, do it once you walk in, not from the tree line." Sam grumbled at me.
"So what was so important, that you felt the need to yell for me?" Sam asked as we met each other in the middle of his drive.
"I imprinted today, and managed to mess it up at the same time." I told him before walking past him and towards his porch.
"Paul, what have you done? How can you mess something like imprinting up?" Sam asked walking up the porch steps.
"If I knew how strong the imprinting shit was, I would have been able to control myself without blurting out what I am and that she is now my soul mate."
"You didn't tell her did you?" Sam asked and I could see he was trying to control his temper.
"I didn't have much choice did I? As soon as I imprinted I wanted to spill all my secrets to her." I told him as I sat down on the porch steps.
"Yeah, that is hard. The Elders are not going to be happy that there is some random girl on the Reservation knowing all our secrets, but I will help explain it to them the pull to tell your soul mate everything."
"The thing is Sam, she is not some random girl, and she does not live on the Reservation. Last time I checked she was living in Forks." I told him, I could see the panic on his face, and I knew he was trying to think if there were any families from the Reservation living in Forks.
"Is she native?" Sam asked.
"Nope she is a pale face." The second the words left my mouth; I felt even more pressure on my chest and tried to grip the pressure again.
"Guess you can't call her a pale face anymore" Sam commented with a smirk on his face.
"This shit hurts" I mumbled once the extra pressure was gone.
"So who is she anyway, I don't think the Elders were expecting this to happen. Do you think she can keep the secret?" Sam asked.
"Yes, she can keep secrets; she has been keeping a secret herself."
"Paul stop messing around, who is your imprint? I need to let the Elders know, and they won't like the guessing game."
"It's Bella Swan." I told him unable to take the smile off my face.
"Holy shit, Paul." Sam replied clearly shocked.
"I need your help Sam, she doesn't believe me. She actually thinks that I am joking with her, she drove away and left me."
"What do you want me to do Paul?" Sam asked still looking shocked.
"Go see her, tell her that I was telling the truth and it is not a joke. Maybe see if the Elders will have a bonfire, she can be told the legends. I don't know Sam, but I really need your help." I begged him, and I knew that if he asked I would get on to my knees and beg.
"Ok Paul, I will call Billy Black after dinner, and then I will go see Bella after. I'm not going to promise you anything, she might need time and I am sure Emily would be happy to talk to her."
"Thanks Sam, anything is better than her totally rejecting me." I replied before standing up when the smell of Emily's cooking started to seep under the door.
"Paul, wait here" Sam then said standing up and stopping in front of me, I watched as he walked in only to come back out with some cut-offs.
I did not even realise that I was naked; this imprinting really does take over everything else.
"Let's try not to shock Emily too much, hey" Sam said as I put the cut-offs on with a grin.
"Ha, Ha."
We walked in to find Emily placing the cooked food on the table; I had forgotten what her cooking was like. Sam told Emily about my imprint on Bella, and she was happy that there was another girl amongst them.
Sam called Billy after dinner, and I could hear his shock at my imprinting. He was not happy with the secret being revealed but was going to let the other Elders know and arrange a bonfire for Saturday, my only hope was that Sam could explain everything better and Bella would be at the bonfire.
I followed Sam out the door, the plan was that I was going to be in the forest behind her house and hope that maybe she would want to see me. Sam was going to be asking Jared to stay on patrol until he could take over.
"So how is the leech lover?" Jared chuckled as he walked out of the forest.
Before I could control my temper I jumped off the porch and phased mid-air, all that was going through my head was that my mate had been insulted. Jared phased before I could get to him but I was quicker and able to wrap my mouth around his neck before he could defend himself.
"Paul, let Jared go now! Jared apologise to Paul now!" Sam ordered before pushing himself between us and forcing me to let go of Jared's throat.
"Sorry Paul, I was joking bro. I forgot that you wouldn't be calling her by her old nickname anymore."
"Jared, you should be able to understand how Paul is feeling. Go patrol while I help Paul try to sort this all out." Sam ordered before he phased back to his human form.
I walked over to the forest and started to pace in a line while I waited for Sam to come back, Jared's thoughts were hidden and he was now concentrating on the forest scents and thinking about Kim.
I felt the air shift and my thoughts were soon joined by Sam's.
"I just got us some more cut-offs, try not to rip them apart, I am beginning to run low on supplies."
"Sorry Sam, but I couldn't control my tempter." It was then that my thoughts turned to my temper, and what could happen if I lost my temper while too close to Bella. I couldn't help but think of Emily's face and the scar she would now carry for the rest of her life.
"Sam what if I lose my temper and Bella is too close to me?" I asked him as we started to make our way towards Forks.
"I will help you as much as I can, we will let Bella know what to look out for if you are going to lose control. Your imprints touch will also help you to calm down, but sometimes it won't always work. Paul stop worrying about the what ifs. I will never let what happened to Emily happen to any other imprint, you have my word." Sam promised, before we both concentrated on running to Forks.
I stopped in the treeline while Sam phased back, he dropped the spare cut-offs at my feet before turning around and walking towards the house. I started to pace again while listening to Bella's heartbeat in her bedroom.
