"You have a visitor, Mrs. Fields." The old nurse croaked, a crooked smile plastered on her lipstick smeared lips.
"Boy or girl?" Emily tiredly asked.
"Boy." The nurse assured Emily, who nodded almost instantly.
"Let him in." Emily confirmed, thinking almost certainly that it was Toby or Caleb, maybe even her father back early from deployment. The nurse disappeared from the doorway for several moments, leaving Emily with nothing, but the low droning sound of the cartoons on the hospital television. It had been 3 and a half days or so since she was hospitalized and still the event seemed so surreal. Emily had been working overtime to figure out what she had done to deserve being beat up and left for dead in the middle of the road, but nothing came up
After a few moments, a familiar face appeared from the cracked entrance.
Emily let out a small gasp as the boy swiftly approached her. Emily remembered him calling her some names she'd rather not think about when he found out she was gay. What in the world was he doing in her hospital room? Could he be the one behind her attack?
"Hey." He breathed, taking in Emily's condition. The brunette noticed his wandering eyes.
"Yeah, I know. I look like hell." She spoke with more confidence than she did on her first day in the hospital. Still, there was a broken fragment in her voice that made it not sound like Emily at all.
"No, you don't, Emily." He was on the verge of tears and Emily instantly felt bad for thinking he could've played a part in what happened to her.
"Ben…" Emily began in defiance, but Ben shook his head as if trying to shake himself of some misplaced guilt.
"I- I am so sorry." He apologized. Emily mustered up a weak smile and nodded in thanks. They both knew what he was apologizing for, though they preferred to not say it aloud.
"What are you doing here, Ben?" Emily finally brought herself to ask. Clearly he hadn't taken the time out of his day to come to the hospital and just say he was sorry for trying to force himself on her two years ago. There was something more. He knew something, but Emily understood how angry he could get if pushed so she settled on sticking with her initial question.
"I just wanted to see you, I guess." Ben replied, looking away uncomfortably. He definitely had something else on his mind, but it was no use trying to yank it from him. He would talk when he was ready.
"Well, here I am." Emily said, as if waiting for a more stimulating topic to come about.
"Yeah." Ben whispered, just staring.
"I haven't really been taking visitors. I need a lot of rest so-" Emily tried, but Ben cut in.
"Don't talk to the police anymore, okay?" He rushed, taking Emily by surprise. Why would he want her to keep quiet about what had happened to her? Someone needed to be incarcerated for it and cooperating with the police may not be such a bad idea in this case. Normally, the cops made things worse for the girls, but this game had been taken too far and Emily's parents weren't going to give up without a fight.
"What? Why would you say that? I have to talk to them." Emily defended, feeling a bit of fire mix in with her confusion.
"No, you don't." He murmured, turning towards the window and rubbing his eyes.
"If the girls didn't find me when they did...I could have died, Ben. I was one punch away from a coma." Emily replied, hotly. "And you don't want me to find the people that did this to me?"
"It's not that I don't want you to find them...it's just that you don't know who it was. Details get mixed up especially when you're scared and the situation is hectic. You could convict the wrong person by mistake. That's all I'm saying." Ben clarified with a shrug.
"Oh, I'm sorry, it's kind of hard to study someone's face when they're bashing yours in!"
"Em...all I'm saying is you don't know for sure…"
"Yeah, I'll keep that in mind." Emily spat back, crossing her arms. "I have to take my meds soon. Do you mind?"
With no other words, Ben nodded and left the room. Emily felt her stomach begin to tie itself in knots. Ben made her feel disgusting and guilty, as if what happened to her was her fault, as if she should feel wrong for trying to find her attackers.
Emily shuddered, pulling the blanket over her shoulder and drifting to sleep.
!
"What do you mean Ben was here?" Aria piped, crossing her arms with a disgusted look.
"He came to visit her." Mrs. Fields explained, looking into Emily's room practically every second to make sure her daughter was still alright.
"And she actually let that man whore in?" Hanna scoffed, rolling her eyes.
"Easy, Han." Aria put in. Of course, Emily had her reasons for doing certain things, but that didn't always mean her decisions were smart.
"Aria, that creep tried to steal her V card in a locker room." Hanna argued, eliciting an uncomfortable sigh from Mrs. Fields.
"Mom still in the room." She quipped, rubbing her temples.
"I just don't get why she would let him visit her." Aria inquired, raising an eyebrow as she gazed upon the peaceful Emily.
"The memories." Spencer cut in, evoking several questioning glances from her friends. She continued. "We all found her that night. We saw how bad it was. We bring back those memories. Ben doesn't." She finished. Everybody thought upon it for a minute before Mrs. Fields broke the silence.
"Do you girls know who could've done it?" She asked, hopefully. All the girls shook their heads.
"They were long gone when we found her." Aria answered. Mrs. Fields looked down with displeasure.
"They'll find out who did it, Mrs. Fields." Spencer comforted.
"Well, either way, I'd like for you girls to start visiting her. I don't want her alone with Ben again."
The girls all nodded. When Mrs. Fields walked away to talk to the doctor, Spencer pulled all the girls in close.
"Not a word to Paige."
5,040; that's how many minutes passed before Paige could even contact Emily again. 3 and a half days earlier, Emily had informed her girlfriend that she needed to be alone so Paige simply respected Emily's wishes and lazed around in her bedroom, skipping school and missing Emily every waking minute of the day.
Paige couldn't sleep, eat, go to school, or function in a normal manner while her girlfriend was lying in a hospital bed filled with the immense emotional and physical pain of her attack. No way.
Paige spent too much time pacing back and forth, contemplating what she could've done to make Emily push her away in a time of need. Everything turned back into Paige's fault. Someone beat up Emily for being gay, Paige was the girlfriend showcasing Emily's sexuality. Nobody would know Emily was into girls if she didn't have Paige on her arm during school and in town. Emily's friends hated Paige. After all, she tried to bully Emily into quitting the swim team. Paige's own parents seemed to despise her. She was never good enough and that was her fault too.
No.
She couldn't pull herself down like that. If she was at rock bottom, she would never be able to help Emily recover. That was the thought that finally convinced Paige to take a shower, eat some breakfast, and go to school the following Tuesday after the attack. Paige could only imagine the looks she would get in the hallway from her peers. Every teen and teacher at Rosewood knew that Paige had tried to hurt Emily in the past and even though the two eventually made amends, when something bad happened there was bound to be talks and speculation.
Nothing could've prepared Paige for the hostile environment she walked in to that morning. Paige was a serial killer walking through a wrestling ring filled with the families of her victims. She got glares and expressions that informed her that everybody thought negatively of her. It was near unbearable. Even Mr. Tamborelli exchanged a concerned glance with Paige that let her know he had his opinions on the matter.
Apparently, the story that spread was that Paige hired three swimmers from Danby University to attack Emily so Paige could take her place back on top. It really resurrected the anger issues that Paige had desperately spent years suppressing before she transferred to Rosewood. How could anybody in their right mind believe in a story where Paige arranged for her girlfriend to be attacked? She barely could stand watching dramas with Emily because she hated to see the girl cry, but apparently, nothing Paige could ever do would convince anybody of her devotion to Emily. All she was was a violent bitch with an agenda, that was the reputation she was stuck with.
All these thoughts sludged through Paige's head as she plodded towards her first period class. She had Government with Aria and Hanna, a class she dreaded from the moment she made her decision to go in.
"Hey." Hanna greeted the girl as they all took their seats. Almost the entire class was watching Paige out of their peripheral vision like she was a circus sideshow that they couldn't look directly at. Paige nodded in reply, her eyes manic and unresponsive. She couldn't get her mind off how Emily looked when they found her. "Are you okay?" Hanna wondered.
"I guess." Paige shrugged, the tone of her voice damaged by the intense stress of the situation.
"Have you seen her since that night?" Aria asked. Paige shook her head. "Us either."
"Wait, I thought her mom said she was having visitors again. She told me Emily was becoming more social." Paige inquired, her cynicism growing as she found out more facts.
"Yeah, just two besides her family. I thought you already knew that." Hanna replied. Paige cocked her head, wondering who Emily's two visitors were. Aria and Hanna seemed to get the clue that Paige wanted to know and they exchanged uncertain gazes.
"Who are they?" Paige finally forced herself to say. She deserved to know who was visiting her girlfriend.
"Well, one of them is Zoe. From Emily's Haiti work." Aria began.
"And the other?"
"Paige, you have to know that Emily has her reasons." Aria stammered, attempting to make light of a situation she knew was about to blow up in their faces.
"Hanna, tell me." Paige closed her eyes, ready for something horrible like Jenna or Mona to be the second person.
"Spencer." Hanna quickly lied, pushing Ben away from the conversation entirely.
"What?" Paige intoned. Hanna and Aria looked as if they had just exposed government secrets to a foreign country.
"Sh- she is taking visitors now, but she's only asked for Spencer." Aria's voice had become shaky, nervous with the fear of upsetting Paige.
"Why didn't she call me?" Paige inquired with an expression of confusion rapidly turning into vexation.
"She doesn't want to hurt you." Hanna avoided harsh wording with great ease, but just like clockwork, Paige seemed to be reading the blonde's mind.
"What did she say? Besides the obvious." Paige asked, her interest completely captured. Emily wanted to spend time with Spencer, who could be a bit much to handle, instead of Paige and it only made Paige feel like she was at fault for this entire situation even more so than before.
"You know, I think we're supposed to be reading from the book." Aria tried, opening hers to a random passage. Paige clenched her jaw in annoyance.
"What did she say?"
"She doesn't want to see you until she gets home." Hanna finally admitted.
"And when is that?"
"Friday."
All Paige saw was red. She felt the ceiling caving in and the next thing she knew she was leaning against her car, tears streaming down her face. What the hell would make Emily want to shut out own girlfriend for another week? What did Paige do to make herself so unbearably awful?
Paige was having a perfectly fine time bringing herself down, when another voice broke her from her self-hating reverie, another voice that would only further push her down the dark hole she was digging.
"Paige?" She caught glimpse of the girl on her way into the school and ran over, observing her condition. "I'm guessing you heard?" Spencer's somewhat demeaning voice chimed in. Paige turned around with no more energy than a terminal senior citizen.
"What the hell do you want, Spencer?" She shot back in a vulnerable and defeated tone, not in the mood to fight.
"I just want to talk, Paige." Spencer replied, keeping her calm under control.
"Are you the one who made up the Danby story?" Paige had to ask. She knew Emily loved Spencer and that they were best friends, but Paige was quickly realizing that there wasn't a whole lot that would be below Spencer, including fabricating a story to hurt Paige.
"I wouldn't make up a ridiculous story like that. It just puts Em through more than she needs." Spencer shrugged, leaning against the car with the upset girl.
"Then what?" Paige whispered. She had a lot of things on her mind and keeping Spencer satisfied and at bay wasn't one of them.
"I'm talking about this week. What everyone is saying. Kids can be cruel." Spencer began, her entire posture tensing up. Paige felt her annoyance simmer down and her tears began to well up again.
"Spencer, you don't-"
"I keep playing bitch because I'm trying to protect my friend, but I've been there, Paige. When I got out of Radley, this school became even more of a nightmare." Spencer moved in closer to the girl, the sorrow staining her eyes. She didn't care what prejudices and qualms she had against Paige, the girl was hurting and her support system was in the hospital, refusing to see her.
"She's all I want." Paige broke down. "Yes, I pushed her head underwater to scare her, yes I bullied her terribly, yes I was jealous of her, but I would never, ever hurt her. I know I've made mistakes, but… I'm in love with her, Spencer." When Paige finished, her nails were digging into the skin on her palms and her breathing became heavy as her tears fell down her face again.
"Hey, hey, it's okay." Spencer pulled Paige into a hug, letting her cry it all out. "Look, let's get you home." Spencer calmed. She didn't usually let her guard down and do kind things for those she was suspicious of, but she had been in Paige's shoes only a few months ago. She had been ridiculed and looked upon as an outsider and it drove her mad. She knew Emily would never forgive her if she didn't protect Paige and so far, Spencer was the only one calm enough given the circumstances to do so.
Spencer turned around to go to her car, holding Paige's hand as she guided her, but Paige stopped.
"I want to visit Emily." She insisted, drawing concern from Spencer. "Don't try to talk me out of it. I'm going with or without you."
