Author's Notes – If this sucks, sorry…no pun intended. If you want the full version of events email me.
Summary – Zedd and Tommy have a little talk, followed by a little sex.
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What I Feel For You
Zedd
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Looking at the nearly finished two story home, complete with reinforced basement which will serve as our base of operations of sorts, I wonder if even using the word 'our' is correct as it's becoming increasingly clear that he is trying to shove me further and further away.
If only I knew why I might be able to correct it before it's too late, but honestly aside the simple idea that he just might not be interested in being with me anymore I can't come up with any logical reasoning for his behavior.
Heaving a sigh and turning to go back to the ship wondering when he will return from his day's outing I barely make it a step before running smack into the human in question.
"Ow." Landing on his butt and looking up at me with a slight scowl as he'd taken the brunt of the encounter, his greeting is however oddly subdued. "Suppose that's what I get for trying to be sneaky." Sneaky?
Holding out a hand and pulling him back to his feet when he accepts it, I raise a brow as he slowly brushes himself off. "And what dare I ask were you trying to be sneaky about?"
"Don't know, thought I'd either pounce on you or give you a kiss or something, but right when I was going to you turned." Shrugging at his failed plan, a plan which has me even more curious then before, he turns his attention to the nearly completed dwelling I myself was admiring only moments prior. "It looks nice."
"Yes, despite their lack of speed, the humans I hired are in fact doing a good job quality wise."
"Yeah."
"Did you have fun in town?" Still a bit curious as to where he went, especially since he venomously informed me that he would not stand for being followed anymore by me or my 'minions', I'm again taken by surprise as an actual detailed response is given instead of his usual one liners.
"Yeah. I went to see an old friend from college. She worked with me and Mercer until Mercer kind of went over the deep end. She's really smart." Crossing his arms in more of a gesture to ward off the chilly late afternoon air then in defense it would seem he continues calmly. "I was thinking maybe she could help us with the morphers and the lair. You know since neither one of us is all that good with technology."
"Interesting idea." Forcing back a small flare of jealousy wondering if perhaps his suddenly odd demeanor is a warning to him informing me of some interest in this woman, I press on already wishing to turn down said idea. "What's her name?"
"Hayley."
"And what makes you think Hayley will be willing to help?" Especially after I throw her in a trashcan and send her halfway across the galaxy.
"Because she already said she would." Of course. Swallowing and careful to avoid my eyes he continues softly. "I wasn't totally honest with you before. I mean I didn't lie exactly I just didn't mention that Mercer wasn't the only one I told about the Ranger stuff."
Rubbing my eyes and trying my best to not jump into a typical Zordon like lecture I press him further as gently as I can, really just needing to know how bad the situation is before I can determine what to do about it and possibly this woman. "What exactly did you tell her?"
"Same stuff I told Mercer basically. About you, Zordon, the others, she was working on the projects with us, but she got out when things turned sour. She tried to get me to go too, but I couldn't just leave him with the technology. I thought maybe if I couldn't save him I could at least stop him. She's the one that designed the bombs for me when I realized what it would come down to." I was wondering how he managed those. Hm, perhaps I shouldn't cross her after all.
"And she wants to help?"
Nodding and moving to stand next to me he relaxes visibly as I wrap my arms around him, pulling him back to rest against me.
"Alright if that's what you want." Deciding myself that someone who can build explosives of that nature could be a formidable ally, I consider the matter closed when Thomas speaks up once more.
"There's one more thing I need to tell you."
Resisting the urge to beat my head against a tree, I try to prepare myself for what ever else the human could possibly be hiding. "What is it?"
Swallowing hard and turning to look up at me he is clearly much more concerned about this one then the last. What on Earth did he do that could have him so worried? "I-I um…I don't want you to leave." Leave? What now?
"Thomas I'm not leaving. Not unless, unless you want me to. I thought we already went over this." I mean I'm building him a house for crying out loud, if that doesn't prove I'm not leaving I really do not know what will.
"We, we never really went over anything Zedd. Not what I did while you were gone, not what your plans are for the future, not any of it. You just showed up like always and seemed to assume everything would be picked up from where we left it off at ten years ago." Taking pause and thinking this over a moment he shakes his head smally. "And honestly maybe that's what we did do now that I think about it because this is exactly where we were back then too. Neither of us knew anything about what the other was doing or wanted and…I don't know. I don't know what to do about it or you or us."
"All you know is that you do not want me to leave. Correct?" Getting a fast but certain nod, I feel my temporary worry dissipate a bit. "Alright so if you don't want me to leave and I don't want to leave than all the other stuff we can work on. You, no not just you, all of you humans, you put too much importance on trivial things. Things that really have no bearing on how mates feel for each other. That's one thing I don't think I'll ever fully understand about your species."
Frowning and pulling back so he can look at me fully, it's clear we're not meeting eye to eye on this. "But if you don't put some level of importance on the small stuff how are you supposed to get along. You can love someone but if you don't like them it makes being with them pretty near impossible."
"That is such crap Thomas. Look at myself and Zordon. We despise the very ground the other walks on. He is an anal retentive, obsessive compulsive, cleaning fanatic, with a tendency to give exceedingly long winded lecturers about anything and everything that is good and right, while I…well I am me, which is so much better, but yet I care enough for him, feel enough for him that when he is in danger or trouble I will go running to help just as I would for you."
Voice flat and untouched by my- in all fairness -very touching revelation, his next words make me sigh at his lack of comprehension. "Please don't say you're in love with Zordon."
"I'm not in the type of love with him that I am for you, no. I've no desire to bed him thank you."
"So you don't care what I've done while you were gone?" Finally. Was beginning to think I'd have to crack his head open and see what wires weren't connecting.
"Correct. Not that I wish you to mistake that as disinterest though. I'm very interested to learn about what you've done during my absence and would like very much to hear about your time at college and digging up dinosaur bones, friends, family, and so forth. It just won't have any effect on how I already feel about you that's all." In all truth he could have gone on another evil rampage and I wouldn't care, he'd still be mine…though that would be pretty cool.
Taking a deep breath and giving a small if not hesitant smile it would seem that he's made up his mind about something, though what that is I'm still in the dark on. "Okay, but not tonight. I think I'd rather go back to the ship and maybe try to, what's the word you used, reconnect."
"Are you certain you're convinced I'll not leave you now?" Already pulling him back into the woods where my ship is safely cloaked, I am unable to contain the smile in my voice or on my face if his amused look means anything.
"Maybe you should give me a little more convincing. Like say in our bed?" Alright let's see if I can understand what has just happened here. Save his life, I get anger and yelling. Give him morphing gems, of the dino brand if I'm correct, I get sulky, sullen, and distant human behavior. Ignore him and let him go be with his human friend for one afternoon, I get sex. Perhaps I shall send this Hayley person flowers tomorrow.
"You humans are so bizarre." Shaking my head and ignoring his confused look I begin moving faster all but dragging him along the path and closer to our bedroom.
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"Do you really think I'm bizarre?" Entering our room, body pressed oh-so-pleasantly close to my own, he looks at me imploringly, a small frown marring his otherwise perfect face.
"Is this a trick question?" Or perhaps a stall tactic.
Shaking his head and moving to sit down on the king sized bed he kicks off his boots with casual ease that I can see he isn't really feeling.
"I think your species is bizarre, so yes by association I suppose that would mean you are as well. However I never said there was anything wrong with that. If anything I find it makes you slightly more interesting."
Look uncertain if he should be pleased or not by my explanation, his voice nevertheless takes on a teasing tone. "So I wouldn't be interesting otherwise?"
My own boots removed before joining him on the bed, I place my hands on either side of him, looking deeply into his soothing brown eyes. "You will always be interesting to me."
"Promise."
"Promise." Crawling over him and initiating the first kiss, much like I had all those years ago when he still wore white and still believed in good triumphing over evil- how cute naivety is -I move my hand brushing my fingers over his slightly scratchy cheek making a note to get him hair remover the next time I take a trip to Eltar.
Humans and their lack of hygiene, honestly. If he was eltarian he'd be completely smooth save for the spiky locks on his head and perhaps that little goatee thing he seems to very fond of. Why in the universe his species seems to find it fine though to allow males to be covered in hair when females have the right idea and remove it is beyond me.
Pulling back when I make a small noise of thought at this, his smile along with the placement of my hand tells me he knows where my mind has wandered to. "I can always stop and go shave if you like."
The suggestion said in jest, he is not surprised as I scowl in response. "You do and I'll chain you to the bed." Mmm chains, naked, helpless, in chains…oh yeah we're definitely doing that some day down the line. Body responding almost instantly to the raunchy scenario, I continue, voice dropping an octave or two. "Perhaps even throw in a blindfold and nice cat-o-nine tails since you're being so very cheeky today."
Sudden weariness entering his eyes at my playful threat his smile falters and returns much too quickly for my liking. What did I say? I was only playing. Surely he doesn't think I'd actually chain him to the bed, well on our first time together that is. And even then it's not as if I'd harm him or refuse to let him up if he changed his mind.
"Maybe we should just stick to pretend restraints this time, okay?"
"Whatever you want, pet." The reassurance coming easily and truthfully, I once again pick up my tender touches on his face, marveling at how different yet similar he looks to his younger self as I try to ease away the still present uncertainty I can see all too clearly.
"Pet?" Humor once more entering his eyes, his brow is cocked questioningly at the term of endearment as I mentally kick myself for letting such a thing slip.
Doing my best to keep my appearance calm and collect I give a shrug of disinterest. "Yes, pet, what of it. It's a simple term of endearment nothing more."
"Yeah but pet?" Stupid British television.
"Would you prefer something else? Perhaps your little friend's moniker of 'bro'."
Cringing at this and shaking his head with a slight look of distaste I suppose I should be relieved he has the same feelings on that as myself. "I don't think so. I mean its one thing for Jason to use that term considering how much like brothers we are, but I don't think I'd want to sleep with anyone who considers or calls me any form of the word brother." Indeed.
"Fine then so pet it is. Now hush and let me get back to business before we both begin an argument that will last well into the night and that you know neither one of us will win." Trust me it's happened before.
Pressing my lips to his before he can protest further and urging him back down with the weight of my own body I'm slightly surprised as he allows me to take the dominate position without even the pretense of a fight. Not that I hadn't expected him to accept being the more passive one this first time, but I had truly thought he'd at least put up a token protest if for nothing else then simply for the sake of being difficult. Perhaps he's more uncertain then I thought. Though he was the one to suggest we do this was he not? Telling me we should go reconnect as I'd suggested several weeks ago.
"You're thinking too much." Pulling back just enough to keep his lips brushing against my own, his words are familiar, ones I know I've used on him before. "This shouldn't require so much thought."
"Sorry, suppose I'm just worried."
"Worried?"
"I want this to be good for you." Moving to place small but precise kisses down his neck I smile as my nose takes in the sent of my own cologne, which he's apparently used on himself today. Cute. "After all you only get one first time at this right? And I'm certain you are no different from most anyone male or female, having some form of an idea as to how you'd want that to be." I know I did. And unlike myself I'd very much like to make this right for you, or at least close to it.
Shaking away my own troubled memories of my first time, which was by far much too rough, fast, and brutal I catch another brief flash of weariness seep through the human's telling eyes. "You do have some idea of how you'd like this to be, yes?"
"I…I just want to be with you." How enduring, however not very helpful.
"Me you have, is there nothing else you want though? You just don't seem…it seems like there's something that I'm missing here, and if I can fix it I'd like to do that." He didn't want moon light and roses did he? Or perhaps some sort of romantic setting? I need help here, I've only ever had two lovers up until now and they were definitely not as soulful and- despite his arguments to the contrary -breakable as the boy currently in my arms.
"Nothing's missing, at least not anymore." Smiling and bringing me back down into a heated lip lock, he cuts off any further questions or concerns I might have regarding the situation.
To be continued….
