Chapter Eight
Cross-Hatch
Fili
The following morning Fili woke earlier than he normally would, unaware of the other body inches from his own. He groaned when he saw that the clock on his nightstand read 6:57, and he stretched, wondering what it was that had awoken him at such an hour.
His outstretched arm met a solid mass, and Fili rolled over to find the back of a messy, brunette head. Smiling, the blonde reached out for a particularly wild strand of brown hair and twirled it around his finger. The hair was slightly wavy and looked like dark, chocolate silk in the dim lighting of his room, and for a moment Fili wondered if he was perhaps still asleep and dreaming, but then he remembered the previous night - staying up until late hours talking to his new acquaintance, carrying Kili to his bed after he'd fallen asleep…
Fili gasped and let go of Kili's hair, jerking back slightly in surprise. The sudden, accidental movement caused the blonde to roll off of the bed, effectively managing to hurt himself and wake Kili from his heavy sleep. As the younger boy rolled over, brows scrunched in confusion and sleepiness, Fili felt all the blood in his body rush to his cheeks.
"Whas goin on?" Kili asked, rubbing at his eyes. He didn't seem fully awake, and the blonde was secretly hoping he would fall back asleep and believe the entire situation had been a dream.
"Uh, um… Nothing. I just.. I-I was startled and fell out of bed," he replied stupidly, unable to tell him the truth - that he was more attracted to Kili than was healthy, and he was simply trying to maintain a platonic friendship with the brunette, not wanting to scare him away.
Kili's hand dropped from his face, and he sat up a little straighter, blinking at his surroundings. "Bed?"
Fili nodded, swallowing thickly.
"Why am I in your bed?" he asked a little more clearly. "I thought I was supposed to sleep in the guest bedroom."
Fili, if at all possible, turned even more red in the face and scratched at the back of his head to calm his nerves. "You fell asleep while I was talking, and I didn't want to attempt dragging you all the way to the other room, so I just put you in my bed." Fili grimaced at his own words. It hadn't sounded nearly as creepy in his head.
Kili glanced away, staring far too intently at the door. He was sitting up, slightly hunched over, still wearing his clothes from yesterday, and the blankets were bunched around his waist. Deep brown strands of hair stuck out every which way, and the rest of it fell in thick waves down to his shoulders, almost appearing inky in the dark room. Fili couldn't breathe.
The blonde stood up awkwardly, all while trying to find something to distract his gaze from Kili, but nothing was jumping out at him, and his eyes kept returning to those unkempt locks. "I have to, uh, go," he eventually mumbled before rushing out of the door and down the hall to the restroom.
Stupid, stupid, stupid! Fili thought to himself, leaning against the counter, glaring at his reflection in frustration. Why must I be such an awkward twat?
He stared for a while longer, upset with himself for his own social ineptness, before taking a much needed piss. He was unable to shake Kili's suddenly distant expression. The boy was many things, but detached wasn't one of them; he always seemed enthusiastic about things, whether it be negative or positive. He was never so quiet.
After adjusting his pants and grumbling a few obscenities under his breath, Fili also decided to pull his hair back in a low ponytail and brushed his teeth and brushed his teeth before heading back to the bedroom, plastering what he hoped was a nonchalant expression on his face.
He didn't expect to find Kili up, his hair pulled back neatly and pulling on his shoes.
"Going somewhere?"
The brunette's head whipped up, startled by the sudden voice. "I just remembered I have to be at work by 7:30. I would've set an alarm, but I wasn't exactly thinking about it last night," he replied shakily, looking back down and his shoes as he tied the laces.
Fili hated to see him go so soon, but at the same time was relieved. The atmosphere between the two was tense, and he wasn't sure how much it would take to make him snap and do something incredibly stupid. This boy was supposed to be like a cousin - or maybe even a brother - to him, and he didn't want to screw up what they had going.
"Do you need a ride?"
Kili shook his head and stood up, heading briskly towards the door. "I'll be fine."
Fili let the brunette push past him and out of the room, watching his retreating form. He didn't know how long he stood there, but eventually he did follow, making his way downstairs. It obviously hadn't been that long, because Kili was still there, and much to Fili's delight, Bilbo was insisting on giving the youth a ride to work. Kili eventually gave in, due to the fact that Bilbo was also going in to take care of some things, and probably assumed this would mean the elder wouldn't be going out of his way to do something for him. Fili wished Kili would just let others help him.
For the rest of the morning Fili went through the motions. He ate the breakfast that Bilbo had left for him, drank three mugs of black coffee, sketched out a few things, and read a little bit of a book he'd just started recently. It was, technically speaking, a completely normal morning, but an hurricane was raging inside of him, and he wasn't truly able to focus his mind on anything.
Thorin clearly took notice of this.
"Fili," his deep voice rumbled as he took a seat at the counter next to the boy, "What is troubling you?"
Fili pulled his eyes from a page in his book to look at his adoptive father, trying to mask his face into something somewhat neutral. "Nothing. I'm fine."
The look Thorin gave him made it clear that he wasn't going to believe him for a moment. He knew his son better than that. "You and I both know that isn't true. And you should also know that you can trust me with whatever it is."
Fili gave a minuscule shake of his head and stared at his lap, knowing that he shouldn't lie to Thorin, but he also couldn't bring himself to tell him his issue, figuring the older man would scoff at him in disgust. "I promise you that I am fine. I know you don't believe me, but I can take care of my problems all by myself. I'm an adult. It's nothing I can't handle."
"It's not the first time you've said that," came the response, "and last time you were wrong."
The glare Fili sent Thorin was nothing short of icy. He remembered just as well as anyone and hated when people brought it up. Yes, there'd been a few dark things in his past, but he was over them - he'd moved on. Why couldn't anyone see that?
"I'm well aware of what I said, but this time I mean it. I'm doing far better than I used to be, and my current problems are nothing I can't take care of," he repeated.
Sighing, Thorin gave Fili a calming pat on his back. "I trust you, son. I simply don't wish for you to get hurt or do anything reckless. You're in a good place right now, and it would be best to remain that way."
Fili allowed his posture to slump and nodded. "I know."
"It's almost 1:00," Thorin eventually stated after a few moments of silence. "Why don't you head up and start getting ready for work?"
Nodding again, Fili slid off of his stool and walked away, Thorin watching him with worried thoughts as he went.
Kili
"Kili!"
The brunette looked up from the Caramel Latte he was making to spot a familiar red-head, of course accompanied by her blonde sidekick as they made their way towards the cash register.
"Tauriel," Kili smiled, going back to drizzling a cross-hatch of warm, sweet caramel over the beverage, "I'll be right there." He finished up the drink and handed it over to the appropriate customer, thanking them with his friendly grin and bidding them a good day.
"What are you two up to, then?" he smiled at Tauriel and Legolas, mentally noting that the two really did look good together. Despite Legolas' long hair and pretty features, he still looked somehow masculine, and he stood over Tauriel by a few inches, seemingly casting a protective shadow over her all the time. Kili was still boggled by the fact she hadn't noticed his infatuation for her.
"We're about to head into the shop and figured we'd swing by for our caffeine fix," Tauriel grinned, her sparkling, brown eyes alight with pure friendliness. "I was hoping you'd be working."
"It's your lucky day, I guess," he responded. "What can I make for you?"
Tauriel ordered, and just as Kili was about to ring her up, Legolas said, "I'll pay for hers as well," and ordered his usually vanilla latte with whipped cream and four extra shots.
"You two are so cute," Kili teased as the blonde handed over some cash to pay for the drinks. "How long have you been dating?"
Tauriel just laughed, but Legolas turned so red that Kili was sure he could feel the heat radiating from across the counter. He wasn't positive if the flush was from embarrassment, or anger at Tauriel's laughter, or both, but he knew it couldn't be healthy.
"We aren't dating," Tauriel giggled. "Legolas doesn't even swing that way."
"I'm not gay," he muttered, barely loud enough for Kili to catch.
"Really?" Kili feigned surprise. "I could've swore you two were a couple. You'd be so perfect together, truly!" He was trying his hardest to win Legolas a little bit of game, but the blonde was only turning more red, and Tauriel was shaking her head in hysterics. Kili felt really bad for the guy.
Eventually Legolas left to wait at a table while Kili made their drinks, but Tauriel stuck around to chat for a while. She talked aimlessly about everything from an annoying client she'd had a few days prior to the forest-green color of her nail polish. He was really only half listening to her, nodding every now and then so she'd think she had his attention. He was drawn fully back into the conversation when she spoke his name tentatively.
"What?" he asked.
"I was wondering…" she mumbled, looking nervous for the first time he could remember since meeting her, "do you want to hang out sometime? Maybe have dinner or go to a movie or something? We've been talking quite a bit the last week or so, and I'd really love to get to know you better.. if that's alright?"
Kili, ever friendly, nodded without hesitation, smiling at the girl. He didn't understand what had her so tongue tied, considering she was usually such a confident, easy-going person, but he didn't think much of it and agreed that they should definitely get together soon. Then Kili went about making the drinks they had ordered.
Once he finished, he handed the two warm cups over to Tauriel and waved as she and Legolas left the shop. He didn't miss the miserable look Legolas shot him, and sent him a hopeful smile back, wishing the two would just get together. It would make everybody's life a lot easier.
Thinking about life being easier brought Kili's thoughts back to where they had been previously - to Fili. He couldn't stop thinking about earlier that morning, when he'd woken up in the blonde's bed. The experience had been confusing and shocking but not altogether unpleasant. Sure, it had been pretty awkward, but Kili had been left with a warm feeling that he couldn't shake. He would never admit it, but he was glad that Fili had just let him sleep in his bed. Which was a major problem.
Perverted, fucked-up, ridiculous, disturbing - call it what you want - but Kili was starting to develop feelings for his adoptive-cousin. He couldn't imagine what his uncle would say, and didn't want to think about how Fili would react. The blonde would probably never talk to him again, too disgusted to maintain their new and fragile friendship. He doubted he would find it worth saving.
For the remainder of Kili's shift he tried to be as friendly as possible to his coworkers and customers, but on the inside he was a wreck; tossing negative thoughts and insults at himself over and over, causing him to eventually feel slightly ill, and he didn't argue with the ride home that Bilbo, once again, offered him. All he wanted was to curl up in his bed, under a giant pile of blankets, and never see the light of day again.
Hey! I haven't talked to you guys much, if at all! Sorry about that. Thank you so much to those of you that have been reading so far, and I hope you are liking. Most of what I'm posting is written for Camp NaNoWriMo, so it is either unedited or only slightly edited, so I apologize for typos or anything really confusing. If you guys have any comments, questions, constructive criticism or suggestions please let me know in a review!
Thanks! XoXoXo
