Present Day
Castiel was woken up by a light, gentle shake. His blue eyes slowly flickered open, "Bal?"
"Come on, let's get some dinner."
"What time is it?"
"6pm."
Castiel shot up from his bed, "What? You let me sleep for the entire day?!"
Balthazar shrugged, "You seemed tired, I thought you should rest. It's not like you have anything to do anyway, you don't even work."
Castiel groaned and stumbled out of bed, "True but I don't want to sleep whole day."
He walked into the bathroom and stripped out of crumpled clothes and stepping into the hot shower that he hoped would wake him up. After a quick wash, he dried himself off and put on fresh clothes which were always the same- a t-shirt and jeans. He liked simplicity; he was a simple man after all.
"Cas, I need to talk to you."
"What is it?"
He saw Balthazar hesitate, his eyes couldn't quite meet Castiel's eyes before the words stumbled out of Balthazar's mouth that made Castiel stiffen, his eyes although not angry, they were cold, "I need you to hunt again."
"Why?"
"I'm tracking this… this thing… it's trying to build an army Cas. You've been out of the hunting business for so long you probably don't know this but it's bad Cas. It's like… the demons; they're trying to start a rebellion or something and this thing… I faced him once and that's how I got this." Balthazar pulled up his shirt slightly to show his brother the long gash across his abdominal area. It was a dark, brown scar that looked like the scar had been initially an extremely deep cut- Castiel wince, trying not to imagine what that would have felt like.
"His name is Furcas, I've researched everything I could about him but I don't have much. He's the knight of hell and I don't know what's going on in hell but it seems like he's trying to rebuild his 20 legions of demons or whatever the fuck he's trying to rule. If we kill him, they'll go away. Cas, I know you don't want to do this but I need you, I can't do this alone Cas."
"No."
Balthazar looked at his brother and Castiel knew what he was thinking. He could tell his brother was disappointed in him, perhaps even angry but he was sad yet he understood why Castiel didn't want to go back to the life he once had. It was a hard life, it was life threatening and after so many years he wasn't sure if he could be as good as he was before. The nightmares never really left him, it started when Anna died and when they would go hunting but when Gabriel died, the nightmares got worse. They haunted him so badly that some nights he could no longer fall back asleep; he was curled up in the blanket, drenched in cold sweat and pinching his skin to remind him that it was all a dream. Slowly as he settled into this peaceful town the nightmares did not haunt him so often anymore, although at times he would find himself back in the corner trying to remind himself that it was all just a nightmare.
"I can't, why don't you get someone else?"
"You know they aren't as good as you Cas."
"I haven't hunted in years."
"It doesn't leave you Cas. When you get back in the swing of things you'll be fi-"
"NO!"
Balthazar jumped at Castiel's voice. Castiel gulped, he didn't mean to raise his voice but he couldn't help but clench his fists in anger, his whole body trembling with rage and fear. He didn't want to go back to hunting, he was frightened. When he hunted, he was cruel, emotionless and heartless. He found pleasure in torture and killing, he liked the feeling when his blade slowly tore into the skin of the monsters.
"I… I can't… I can't go back to that, Bal… don't go after this thing… I can't lose you; I don't want to be alone…"
Balthazar was quiet and he gently held on to the trembling hands of his brother, "Balthazar… I need to, I need to go after this thing even if it kills me. If I don't, if it succeeds in getting its army who knows what they'll do to this earth."
"I can't… I can't, god… I need to get out of here."
Castiel ran out of his apartment, ignoring the Balthazar's yell. He ran as hard as he could and as fast as his legs could take him. He needed to get away, he needed to be alone. He stopped at the park, leaning against the tree breathing heavily and he slid down sitting on the grass.
Calm down… You won't go back Castiel… You'll never go back no matter what.
His hands trembled; they haven't stopped since he left. He wanted to go back with Balthazar; he wanted to go back to hunting- it was like an addiction to him. When he killed those monsters, the feeling of power rushed through his body, blood pumping through his veins and he was on a high. It was a drug that gave him an incredible high. He was afraid, if he went back now could he stop and come back to a normal life?
"Cas?"
He looked up, surprised to see a smiling face staring at him, the man's green eyes shined under the street lamp. The man jogged towards him, "What are you doing sitting here all alone in the dark? Hey, what's wrong?" Dean asked in concern, noticing his trembling hands.
"It's… it's nothing."
"God, your hands are freezing, come on, let's get something warm to drink."
Dean helped Castiel get up and propped him against his body for support and the two men walked to the nearest diner where Castiel had suddenly noticed he was cold, he desperately tried to grasp the warmth the mug of hot chocolate radiated.
"Jesus Cas, you should at least worn a jacket. Um, 2 cheese burgers please." Dean ordered before turning his attention to the man sitting in front of him. His hands slowly stop trembling and colour formed as he sipped the hot drink.
"What happened Cas? You okay?"
"Yeah… I'm fine… I just had a disagreement with my brother."
Dean nodded and left the topic, clearly sensing that Castiel didn't want to talk about it further. He smiled and changed the topic, "You know, I come here, that waitress always asks about you."
Castiel raised his eyebrow in confusion, glancing at the waitress who was staring at him, when his eyes met hers she blushed and looked away. She was an average girl, her brown hair tied up in a ponytail while her brown eyes still couldn't quite meet Castiel's blue eyes- she looked like a nice girl, the perfect girl-next-door.
"I… I'm not interested."
"Cas? How long has it been since you've been on a date?"
"Um… 9 years?"
Dean choked on his drink before grabbing tissues and staring at Castiel in shock, "Seriously?"
"Yeah, I don't really go on dates."
"Why not? You're a good looking guy,"
Castiel felt heat slowly crept up his neck and onto his face; he stared at the table, sipping his drink trying to stop the blush that was clearly showing on his face. Dean let out a chuckle and thanked the waitress and took a bite on his burger. As they ate, they talked about small topics, weather, Sam, movies and music but never about Balthazar. Castiel suddenly froze, feeling Dean's foot brush against his leg, he dismissed it as an accident but the second and third time it happened, Castiel couldn't look at Dean- he was quite sure his face was bright red.
Dean quickly paid for the meal despite Castiel's protests, in the end, Castiel lost and walked out of the diner defeated. Castiel walked beside Dean, slightly glad for the darkness because he knew his face was still in a pink flush and he hoped the darkness hid it.
Castiel felt a warm hand grab his gently and he soon realised that Dean Winchester was holding hands with him. He looked at Dean confused but he just gave him a shrug and a smile, while they continued to walk to Castiel's apartment. Castiel pinched himself, wondering if this was a dream or real life but he knew that it wasn't a dream by the warmth that came from Dean's hands.
"Hey Cas?"
He jumped, snapping out of his thoughts while Dean let out a small laugh, "We're here."
"Oh. Oh, thanks Dean."
Castiel let go of Dean's warm hands, instantly wanting to hold his hands again. He missed the comforting warmth that he felt when Dean's hands were on his.
"Oh Cas?"
"Yeah?"
"I think we were disturbed the other time."
Dean smiled, leaning in towards Castiel, his hand resting on the nape of the Castiel's neck, giving the man goose bumps. His heart begun to race and he was sure his face was pink and before he realised it, Dean's lips were just mere centimetres from his. His mind told him to back away, not to get to close. He could be selfish enough to befriend Dean but this… this wasn't something he expected to happen, he couldn't hurt Dean like this. However he couldn't make his body move, despite what was going through his head, he wanted to kiss Dean and he closed the gap between them.
Castiel felt Dean's warm lips against his, sweet from the milkshake he had finished drinking earlier. He left his hands gently cup Dean's face as Dean rested his other hand on his waist, pushing their bodies closer. Castiel moved his lips against his as he felt Dean's hand travel into his hair, gently tugging on his hair that made Castiel moan softly against Dean's lips.
Castiel pulled apart, breathing slightly heavily, leaning his forehead on Dean's.
"Castiel…"
"I have to do… my brother is probably worried… Good night Dean." Castiel said quickly, pulling away from Dean's body and rushing into his apartment building, cursing himself for his lack of willpower towards Dean. Outside, Dean stood outside the building, still feeling Castiel's warmth lingering on his skin, still feeling the smell of Castiel's cologne around him and the feeling of his lips against his made butterflies formed in his stomach. He wished he could kiss Castiel longer, now that he had tasted him he wanted more but he begun to slowly walk away, wanting to go into his apartment and kiss him again but he decided against it.
Castiel let out a sigh and let himself into his room and noticed that Balthazar was waiting for him on the couch but had fallen asleep. Castiel walked towards him, pulling the blanket up to cover his body and stared at his brother's sleeping figure.
This was the few times in his life that Castiel wasn't sure what to do.
A/N: I'm in the writing mood and I'm super excited to write this story! Furcas is actually a real demon and is the knight of hell but there isn't much information about him so I'll probably have to make some up. What do you think Castiel will do? Will he go with Balthazar or stay with Dean? Finally the kissed! Without Balthazar interrupting this time haha. Hoped you enjoyed this chapter, please review : ) Don't read and run, read and review! Let me know what you think so I can have motivation to write more! Reviews literally make me so happy and they're also my motivators.
New chapter will hopefully be posted soon
xx
