Ahhhhhh! I'm so sorry for not updating. I've been procrastinating lately, and honestly, I've been a complete mess! I need to pull back on the reigns and take control of my life once more. It is just getting out of control.

Anywho. This chapter was supposed to have a second part from Fili's point of view, but I felt so bad for not updating that I just decided to post this for now. Hopefully it's not too short. It's also not the best chapter ever, but I hope you guys enjoy it. I'd love to hear some feedback when it's all said and done. Thanks! And I love all of you!


Chapter 18

Involved

Kili

Kili only felt slightly stupid as he watched Bilbo place the tea kettle over the licking flames in the fireplace. Of course the stove wasn't the only way to heat water, but the three men sitting around, watching as Bilbo worked to give them a warm, comforting beverage, clearly didn't think out of the box too often. The brunette tried not to dwell on the thought for too long.

Everyone remained silent, staring at the fire until the water began to boil and the tea kettle let out an obnoxious whistle. Then Bilbo poured the steaming stuff into four cups, over teabags, and dispersed the drinks out to everyone, all of them muttering a soft 'thank you' in return.

Kili clutched his cup in both hands, soaking up as much warmth as he could. He still felt a bit chilled after being in those cold, wet clothes, but there was still a feeling like fire flowing through his veins, which spiked every time he stole a glance over at Fili.

"So," Bilbo began, sitting back down in his own chair, breaking the silence. "This is the perfect chance for some family bonding! Anything interesting happen today?"

The other three men all glanced at one another, sharing uncomfortable looks. Nobody was sure how to respond to that. Sure, interesting things had definitely happened. Did they want to talk about it? Not exactly.

"I would normally take that as a no," Bilbo continued, when nobody decided to reply, "but seeing as you've gone completely red in the face, Thorin, I'm assuming that's not the case." He finished with a smirk.

"I actually had a perfectly normal day," Thorin responded, avoiding eye contact. He was clearly uncomfortable, his head hung low as he stared intently at his tea. Now that Kili was really looking at his uncle, he could indeed see the dark red color that was brushing across his fair skin.

The small man snorted, clearly disbelieving. "I don't believe that for a second. Come on - spill. What happened that has you in such a state?"

"Nothing."

"Thorin." Bilbo pressed on. He was clearly having a good time pestering his husband.

Kili chose that moment to say, "It might be because he walked in on Fili and myself in a compromising position."

The was a very, very short silence - a sort of 'calm before the storm' - and then everyone spoke at once.

"HA! I told you!" Bilbo said.

"It's not what you think!" Fili pleaded for the second time that night.

"That's a lie!" Thorin all but shouted.

Utter chaos broke out, and Bilbo and Kili simply grinned through the whole thing. At one point Fili gave up, since nobody was listening to him, and Kili was afraid the poor guy would suffer from a hemorrhage any moment, due to how red and strained he looked.

Bilbo and Thorin continued to argue, Kili throwing in random words now and then, just to stoke the fire. Normally he wouldn't like being talked about, especially when it came to his love life, but he was, for some reason, enjoying this immensely. He figured part of it was due to the fact that they weren't worried so much about him as they were each other, and the other part was because he trusted and loved this group of people completely, which he'd never really experienced before.

The shouting match didn't seem like it was anywhere near an end when Fili seemingly decided enough was enough. The conversation was clearly too much for him, and to everyone's utter shock, the blonde stood from his chair and growled a firm, "Enough."

The two older men instantly shut up, and Kili stared up at the older boy with wide eyes - half shocked, half turned on.

"Yes, the two of us are involved with one another," Fili continued, almost causing Kili to snort with laughter at his word choice, "But I don't see why we have to make such a big deal out of it. We don't share any blood, and we weren't even raised together. I think this is a good thing for me. He makes me happy, so you both should just learn to accept it." He finished quickly and took a few deep breaths, having slightly run out of air.

"Fili, we aren't upset," Bilbo spoke, before giving Thorin a stern look. "At least, I'm not. Actually, I was quite shocked at first, but after thinking on it, I quite like the idea. Now I won't have to worry about either of you bringing strange boys over."

"I agree," Thorin nodded, sounding genuine, rather than just agreeing for the benefit of not getting in trouble with his husband.

"How did you even find out, Bilbo?" Kili asked, quirking an eyebrow. "How long have you known?"

Bilbo waved his hand about, dismissively. "Just a couple of weeks. I came in one day while you two were napping, and I just had a… feeling."

"And you didn't even question us about it?" Fili countered.

The small man crossed his arms over his chest and gave the blonde a warm smile. "I knew you'd come to us on your own time. I wasn't going to pester you about it. You're an adult."
Fili muttered under his breath, something about not being treated as such. Kili was still feeling rather amused by the whole situation but kind of wished Fili would calm down and take a seat.

"Although," Bilbo continued, crossing his arms and now eyeing the young boys with a very serious stare, "if either of you do anything stupid and hurt one or the other, I will personally deal with it - and none too kindly."

Kili smiled at Bilbo's words, warmed by the fact that he cared so much about them and was so accepting. "That's not going to happen. We promise. Right, Fee?"
Fili nodded in response, but there was a slight strain to his expression. His full lips were pulled into a thin, white line, and the muscles in his jaw and shoulders looked tense. Kili watched as a bead of sweat trickled down the blonde's temple and the side of his face, and it was by no means hot in the house. In fact, it was fairly cold.

"Fili?" he questioned out of concern. "What's wrong?"

Fili didn't respond, but swallowed slowly and let out a shaky breath.

Thorin stood and moved towards Fili. He pushed the youth back into his chair, whispering for him to sit down, and then said, "Is it the withdrawals?"

Fili nodded.

"You need a drink," Bilbo spoke, hopping up to head into the kitchen. They had a liquor cabinet that remained locked at all times, and the location of the key to it was completely unknown to Fili.

"I don't want a drink," he pleaded, looking up at Thorin with wet eyes. Kili wished there was something he could do to comfort him but figured he'd leave it to his family for now. They knew how to deal with this sort of thing, having done it before.

"You need one," Thorin grumbled softly, the deep, smooth sound of his voice soothing the blonde. "You can't go cold turkey on alcohol. You know that. It can kill you, and not to mention, it gives you horrendous mood swings. You need to take this slowly."

"I know," Fili broke eye contact with Thorin to stare down at his lap, tears now spilling silently down his pale cheeks. Kili silently wondered how things had managed to go bad so quickly but knew it wouldn't last long. He simply wished he could understand exactly what Fili was going through and help him fight it.

Bilbo returned moments later with a small wine glass, filled about halfway with a blood-red liquid. "Here, drink this," he spoke, handing the glass to Fili.

Fili stared at it for a moment, clearly hesitant to drink the poison his body so craved, but eventually tipped it back and drained the glass.

"This is so embarrassing," he complained, handing the glass back to Bilbo, his face painted a light red that was even noticeable in the soft firelight. The tears had stopped, and his face now just looked wet and blotchy, but Kili thought he looked as irresistible as ever.

"Don't be embarrassed," Bilbo smiled, giving his arm a light rub. "We aren't judging you. We are all here to help you through this."

"I know," Fili replied with a small, relieved laugh. "You guys are the best." He turned his head to give Kili a smile that was so filled with affection that it made the brunette blush like a version lass - which he practically was. "And I think I'm going to turn in early," the blonde continued, looking back at his fathers, who were still looming over him worriedly. "Sorry to ruin the night."

"Don't you worry about it," Bilbo said. "Are you not hungry, though?"

"Not really," Fili responded, standing up once more. "But the drink did make me feel better. Thank you."

Both of the older men gave Fili a hug, and just as Thorin released him and he turned to leave the room, Kili said, "I think I'll head that way as well. It was a pretty long day."

As he stood from his armchair, Bilbo gave him a knowing look, one eyebrow lifted high, and Kili almost laughed. "Don't worry," Kili assured him. "Nothing bad will happen to your son."

The small, curly-haired man chuckled and moved to give Kili a pat on the cheek. "You're our son as well. Now, off to bed with the both of you. I don't think Thorin will complain about having a peaceful night in without you two troublemakers."
Thorin, who'd now gone back to his place by the fire, nodded in agreement, a dramatic sigh escaping his lips. Fili and Kili both chuckled lightly before saying goodnight and heading towards the staircase together.

Kili was honestly planning on sleeping in his own bed, but as he stopped outside his bedroom door, a roll of thunder was unleashed, so loud that it seemed to shake the whole house, and seconds later a crack of lightning reigned down, lighting the entire hallway. Kili reached out and grabbed Fili's wrist to keep him from walking passed to his own room.

"Kili, what is it?" he questioned after turning and seeing the terrified look on Kili's face.

Kili felt himself slipping back into his shy-mode, and he looked at Fili with a small blush on his cheeks. "Uhm… Uh, I've never done too well in thunderstorms, and I hate to ask, but…"

He trailed off, finding it hard to continue, but Fili seemed to understand what he was getting at. "Come on," the blonde smiled, lacing his fingers with Kili's, and pulled him further down the hallway to his bedroom. Kili couldn't begin to express how grateful he was, so he decided on keeping his mouth shut as he let Fili pull him along.

Fili's room was almost too dark to see anything, but after a bit of fumbling, Fili was able to find a box of matches and a candle and gave the room a bit of light with the small flame it produced. It gave the atmosphere a romantic feel, and the light reflected perfectly off of the stars painted on the ceiling.

"I should've grabbed some pajamas," Kili says, looking down at his still-damp jeans and Fili's shirt that he was wearing.

"Well you can wear the shirt to bed," Fili said, pulling out a couple pairs of clean boxers and some pajama pants. "And you can borrow a pair of underwear and some pants," he continued, handing said items to the brunette.

"Okay," Kili swallowed, taking the items out of his hands and clutched them to his chest, staring nervously. "Do you want me to change in the bathroom?"

Fili laughed and turned around, his own clothing in hand. "I won't look if you don't look."

Kili eyed the blonde for a moment and then turned his back towards him, agreeing quietly. He didn't understand why he was suddenly feeling so shy, since he'd been ready to rip the blonde's clothes off earlier, but he couldn't think of an explanation.

He quickly pulled off his wet pants and slid on the soft, dry ones, chuckling quietly at his own bashfulness, and turned to Fili to say something smart, but instead let out a small gasp when he got an eyeful completely bare backside, not one piece of clothing obscuring his view. Kili wasn't sure why the blonde had taken off his shirt, but since he'd only ever sent the older boy sleep without one, he assumed it was a normal thing. He was obviously in the process of figuring out whether the underwear he was clutching were inside-out or not, and the brunette took the moment to ogle Fili's perfectly muscled, compact body, from his strong, broad shoulders, all the way down to his toned calves, with of course a bit of lingering on his perfect, pert derrière. Kili had to stop himself from drooling and turned quickly away when Fili bent over to pull on his clothes.

"You good?" Fili eventually asked, and Kili said a quick yes, hoping he'd managed to school the look on his face to something neutral.

They turned back to look at each other, and Kili was sure that his face was beet-red, but if Fili noticed, he didn't say anything about it.

The two made haste to crawl into bed, curling up together under the mound of blankets Fili always slept under. Kili, finding his courage again, pulled Fili closer to him, and the blonde rested his head on Kili's chest, the warmth from his cheek radiating through the thin shirt he was wearing.

"So why do thunderstorms bother you so much?" Fili rumbled, giving Kili a squeeze with the arm he had draped over the brunette.

"When I was little, living in the orphanage, they used to give me the worst nightmares," Kili responded. "I always felt so alone in that place, and I suppose I still haven't gotten over it. I know, I'm kind of a baby."

"You're not a baby at all." Fili rubbed a soothing hand over Kili's chest and shut his eyes, smiling sleepily. "Tell me about it."

"The orphanage?"

"Yeah."

Kili looked down at the top of the blonde's head. "Well, what do you want to know? The food was terrible and the children were even worse."

Fili's laughter radiated through Kili's whole body, and his arm tightened even further around him. "What was wrong with the children."

"They were so homely," Kili sighed. "And mean. I had a couple of friends, when I was really young, but once they realized what a loser I was, they ditched me and made new, cooler friends. Then I was pretty antisocial until I met Ori at school, and even then I was alone at the orphanage. I got pretty good grades, though, with all that time for homework."

Fili didn't speak for a long time, still rubbing idly at Kili's chest. His breathing was evening out and Kili figured he was almost asleep and wouldn't reply, until he said, "You're not a baby. And you're not a loser."

"Sure."

"You're not," Fili spoke firmly. His hand came to a stop and clenched into a fist. "You've got to stop talking about yourself that way."

"Like you're any better," Kili retorted.

Fili pushed himself up, supporting himself on his elbow, to stare up at the brunette teen. "Both of us have negative views of ourselves, and I know that I do it too. Hell, I'm even worse, but that has to stop now. We'll always feel depressed if we don't buck up and learn to like ourselves."

"You're right," Kili said, giving Fili a small grin. "We will stop. From here on out, nothing but optimism and love!"

Fili laid back down, grinning widely, and nodded in agreement, the scruff on his cheeks snagging on Kili's shirt. "Good night, Kee," he added, tilting his head up to snag a quick kiss from Kili.

"Night, Fee," he responded once they'd settled in and both shut their eyes. A rumble of thunder sounded overhead, and Kili smiled softly to himself.


Poor little Orphan Kili.

So. Things will start to get interesting again in the next couple of chapters. Fili and Kili will finally go on that date, and some creepy notes might also make an appearance (ooooo foreshadowing!)

As always, Comments, Suggestions and Critique are most appreciated! Even if it's just a quick hello! I love hearing from you guys.