January 2011

"What are we doing?" Emily asked, her voice naturally hushed as Alison pulled her along the flattened leaves. Said leaves, covering the cold, muddy ground, looked as though they'd been walked on recently. Emily couldn't help but wonder if Alison had been the one to flatten them.

"I told you, it's a surprise," Alison insisted. A week into the new year, a day before school would start up for them again, and Alison was insisting that Emily follow her to some unknown location in the middle of the woods. Emily would have been terrified if anyone else was insisting that, but Emily could never be scared of Alison.

"It's really dark, Ali," Emily muttered, looking around at her surroundings. The air it self seemed black as pitch, because Emily couldn't even make out the shapes of the leaves on the trees she was walking past. Then, a warmth spread through Emily's entire body as Alison took her hand. She hadn't noticed, but they had stopped walking.

"We're fine, Em, I promise." Alison's voice was so soft and comforting that Emily felt her head nod instantly, and then they were walking again.

Reaching their supposed destination, Alison stopped them a few minutes later and fumbled for something in her pockets. She retrieved a small flashlight, which she clicked on and shone ahead of her.

It was a tree, standing alone in the center of what seemed to be a clearing. "What…?" Emily didn't finish her question as Alison also pulled out a pocket knife—a lot like the one that Emily's dad had. She wasn't sure when Alison had gotten one.

Alison got closer to the tree, and the light illuminated it more and more until Emily realized what it was. She'd heard about it before at school, from some of the upperclassmen.

The entire bark of the tree, stretching from taller than any high school student and to the very ground, was covered in hearts filled with names or initials. "Whoa," Emily muttered in awe. "How did you find it?"

"I heard some people talking about it during swim before break, and I heard the general location. I've been looking for it for a while, but I found it last night," Alison answered. "I don't know how anybody finds it. It's like a legend almost, passed along by word of mouth and somehow, everyone finds it eventually."

"What are we going to put on it? Our initials?" Emily wondered, raising an eyebrow. Alison quirked one of her own and smiled.

"Nobody ever reads these, and nobody even knows our names, Emily," Alison said, smiling a smile that made Emily light up naturally. "I'll write my name and you right yours."

After somehow managing to find a reachable area of bark that had enough room for their names, Alison began to carve hers into it. By the time she was done, it read "Alison +". Emily took the pocket knife from her best friend and added under it, in as neat of carved handwriting as she could, "Emily". She proceeded to encapsulate the whole statement in a heart, which was surprisingly neat in the end.

They stared at their little piece of the tree, and Emily couldn't help but wonder whether or not someone would ever see it. She found herself not feeling at all scared at the prospect of someone seeing it, though, only a sense of pride. That she and Alison had been brave enough to put their names up on a tree where somebody might see it. And even if she was scared of what could happen if everybody knew about her and Alison, Emily didn't feel scared in this moment. Not even a little.

January 2011

Emily stared down at her lined paper, doodling little shapes over it. A heart here, a star there. She doodled out her own name once or twice, and she hardly thought twice as she began to write out Alison's name in big cursive. She loved Alison's name. It just felt more eloquent and smooth sounding than the name "Emily". Plus, it looked much prettier on paper.

"Miss Fields, do you care to tell us the answer that you seem to be so busily scrawling out?" the teacher snapped from the front of the classroom in a stern voice. Emily immediately looked up, her eyes wide.

"Um…"

She hated getting attention called on herself, especially when it was bad. Alison liked attention a lot more than her, and even that wasn't much. "Or are you not actually busy doing math?"

Emily bit her lower lip nervously, and heard the sophomores around her smirking and chuckling. She was in an advanced math class, and she was one of three freshman in the class. She hated that. Focusing again on the teacher, she shook her head.

"Maybe you'd like to share what you've been drawing with the class?" the teacher snapped, flipping her hair over her shoulder. "No? Then I suggest you put it away and start taking notes before I send you to the principal."

"Yes ma'am," Emily muttered, flipping the page in her notebook to the next blank page, where she started to copy down the stuff written all over the whiteboard. It seemed like lately she couldn't get Alison off of her mind at all. Winter break had caused everyone to slack a little, but Emily felt like school was now her biggest enemy. She didn't mind swimming, especially since Alison had that with her, but everything else just felt like things getting in the way of her being with Alison.

As soon as the bell rang, Emily let out a relieved breath and jumped up, hugging her notebook to her chest and rushing off to her locker. She always felt so small in this place—not that anyone really felt big. There were a few seniors that seemed to think they owned the place, but no one ever had to worry about them. They were harmless.

After going to her locker and trading her notebook for a lunch bag, she hurried off to the front of the school to find Alison. She found her sitting comfortably in their normal spot, her own lunch spread out in front of her. "Hey," Emily greeted, sitting across from her.

"Hey!" Alison's face lit up almost immediately from seeing Emily. "How was math?"

Emily groaned. "Why do you ask questions like that? You know I'll say that it was awful—which is was. How was French?"

"Same," Alison answered. "Mona Vanderwaal is back from her winter trip to Paris, and she's flaunting it to everyone. Her new clothes, her new shoes. She learned things in French that we haven't learned yet, and she's made it a point to teach them only to her little group of mindless pussies. They kept whispering to each other about whatever the hell it was and then giggling like they were sharing secrets. She was gone for two weeks! You can't learn how to say every secret in French after being gone for two weeks! And it's not like she learned anymore than to ask 'Where are the shoes?' and 'How many calories is in that?' while she was gone."

Emily tried not to laugh, because when Alison got into rage mode about Mona Vanderwaal, she scowled nonstop and there was a little wrinkle in her forehead that always made Emily smile. "She sucks," she said instead, though one side of her mouth quirked up.

Alison raised an eyebrow, her scowl gone. "What?"

"Nothing," Emily answered defensively, biting the inside of her lip. Alison now raised both of her eyebrows, waiting until Emily cracked and told her why she was smiling. "You're just cute, okay? It's not my fault."

Red rushed to Alison's cheeks as she lowered her eyes. It wasn't long before they flickered back up to Emily's though, a small smile now spread on her face. "You must've rubbed off on me," she answered coolly. Emily laughed as she began to eat her lunch, nudging her foot against Alison's under their table.

January 2011

"How is there even a choice in these movies?" Alison asked, looking at the DVDs spread over Emily's bed.

"What do you mean? They're all different," Emily stated, tilting her head slightly.

"They're all romances," Alison stated.

"So? You said I could pick the movie, but I couldn't choose between those." Emily shrugged. "I mean, read the backs. They're all different."

"Not really," Alison argued. "Haven't you ever noticed that every single romantic movie or romantic comedy always has the same plot? Sure, little things are different, but they're all so freaking predictable," Alison whined. "There's not a single love story that isn't predictable."

"Disagree," Emily stated plainly. "Grey's Anatomy had a bunch of unpredictable love stories."

Alison shook her head. "Sure, but that's a TV show. Plus, they have so many seasons that they can fit in really dynamic love stories. But movies? They can't fit something epic into a two hour film."

"Fine, do you want to watch something other than those?" Emily asked, gathering up her DVDs.

Alison frowned. "No. I said you could pick the movie, so just pick one of those and I'll watch it."

Emily smiled proudly and leaned down to place a kiss on Alison's lips. "Thank you!" Alison chuckled, rolling her eyes, and waiting for Emily to put on the movie. When it started to play, they curled up together on her bed. It really didn't even matter which movie they watched, because Alison was asleep in minutes, curled into her favorite person.

January 2011

"Emily, your dad should be here in a couple of hours! Make sure your room is clean. I don't want him to feel like there's anything he has to do while he's here," Pam called up to her daughter.

Emily smiled to herself. "Okay, mom!" She hadn't seen her dad in months, and it was safe to say that she was incredibly excited. She had all sorts of things to tell him, like how she was doing on the swim team—excellent, that is. She had to tell him about the first half of her first year of high school. Mostly, though, she just needed to know that he was there for her, like always, despite being away most all of the time.

Emily finished cleaning her room, and then spent an hour texting Alison. The blonde seemed to be amused by how excited Emily was, but the brunette felt almost bad for talking to her about her dad. Normally, she wouldn't, but considering that the papers for Alison's parents' divorce had just been signed and completed. Alison didn't really seem to mind, though, and that was something that Emily loved about her best friend.

About forty minutes before the time that her dad was due to arrive, there was a quiet knock on Emily's door. "Come in!" Emily called. Her door opened to reveal her mother, who looked a little bit upset about something. "What's up, mom?"

"Your dad called," Pam answered, her voice strangely quiet. "He uh, got called into work, so he won't be here."

Emily's face fell, and she set her phone down on the bed next to her as she sat up to process this new information. "But… he missed Christmas, and New Years… he's not even overseas, why can't he come?"

"They need him down in Texas, Emily," her mother answered, although she sounded just as upset as the younger girl. "Maybe we can go visit him in Texas sometime. Maybe for the summer, we can go see him and Uncle Charles."

"Maybe," Emily agreed, though her voice portrayed the only emotion she was feeling—anger. She picked her phone up again.

"I thought maybe we could stay in for dinner, by the way," Pam added in a soft voice.

Emily shook her head. "I'm going to Alison's."

"Emily, this is not your father's fault, and it's not mine," Pam told Emily firmly, but the younger girl didn't care. Her phone in hand, she walked past her mom and started out of the house.

A bike ride later found Emily walking into Alison's bedroom. The blonde, sprawled on her bed writing in something, looking up suddenly. "Emily. What are you doing here?"

Emily bit down on her lower lip, because now she didn't feel angry—just sad.

"Isn't your dad going to be here soon?" Despite the question, Alison's tone gave away that she could already guess what had happened. "Come here," she cooed softly, setting the book she'd been writing in on her end table as Emily approached the bed.

They curled up together, Alison wrapping her arms around her best friend and stroking her hair.

"It's not forever, you know? Your dad… he's committed to training people who are going to defend the country," Alison said softly.

"Well, it sucks that he can't do it here," Emily muttered, a tear slipping from her eyes.

"Do you want to sleep over?" Alison asked, more as a formality, since neither girl really asked the other to sleep over—they just did. Emily nodded as another tear rolled down her cheeks. Alison hugged her tighter and wiped the tear away. "I wish your dad could be here for you, Em. You always get so happy when he's here."

Emily took a deep breath. "I wish both of our dads could be here," Emily said quietly.

Alison didn't respond. Emily had taken her by surprise—the blonde hadn't expected any mention of her dad leaving. In fact, she hadn't thought that Emily thought much about the fact that Alison's family was in shreds. It was, when Alison thought about it in hindsight, a stupid thing to think. "Me too," she finally agreed.

The next morning was Sunday, and Emily's mom was dragging her out to church, so she had to leave relatively early. Alison, however, stayed at her house. She grabbed her journal and started to finish what she'd been writing the day before. Her writing was interrupted, however, when she noticed a white hoodie resting on her desk chair. She got off of her bed to approach the sweatshirt, and noticed that it was Emily's National Guard sweatshirt. Alison hadn't even noticed that she'd been wearing it the previous day.

Making a mental note to return it to Emily the following day, Alison slipped the sweatshirt over her head and returned to her diary.