"Of Loss, Life, & Love"
A Ranma ½ Fanfic by Luna12
Chapter 22: "Education"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ranma stood pacing outside the gateway of the Tendo residence. Without his Pop around to spar, he had managed to make it to Akane's early enough to escort her to school. Heck, Ranma was pretty sure he'd have made it even if his old man had been around for the usual mandatory training. Ranma was determined to see her. His thoughts were a chaotic swirl since last night and the heavy news his mother brought him.

Akane stepped out into the brisk morning, dressed in her usual blue school uniform. She stopped, surprised to see Ranma waiting for her. Her heart started hammering a faster rhythm as memories of last night's kiss returned.

At first sight of Akane, Ranma temporarily forgot his anxiety and melancholy. She came towards him, her clear, kind eyes glowing at him… and then she smiled. Suddenly, nothing else in the world existed. The sun and moon couldn't compare. It wasn't her "I'm-being-polite-smile". It was a genuine, utterly cute smile that radiated joy. That smile was for him, and in that moment he felt as if everything in the world was perfect.

She laid her hand gently on his arm, and her nose wrinkled in amusement. "How long have you been out here? You could have come in, you know. I'm sure Kasumi would have given you some extra breakfast."

Her words broke the spell of her earlier smile. Ranma felt his mouth go dry, unsure how to break the bad news. At the brooding silence, Akane's expression grew concerned. "What's wrong?"

Ranma managed to find his voice, but he couldn't bring himself to make eye contact. "I'm not allowed inside."

Akane laughed nervously and her hand retreated from his arm. "What are you talking about? Of course you're always welcome!"

Ranma took a deep breath before explaining. "It's complicated. My mother made some kind of honor-bound promise with Ukyo, to help settle the dishonor over her swindled dowry."

Akane waited for Ranma to continue. She felt her throat close in nervous apprehension. Auntie Nodoka had seemed so upset with her lately. Was it possible Nodoka was trying to annul the betrothal in favor of Ukyo?

Ranma continued, his eyes downcast. "You know how uptight she is about honor and my manhood. She said I gotta make reparations to Ukyo…"

Ranma briefly explained the conditions. Akane wasn't allowed to come over to the apartment, and neither was Ranma allowed to go into the Tendo residence. He wasn't even allowed inside the dojo unless for teaching or training.

They continued walking as if under a black cloud. Akane felt too stunned to know what to say, at first. "For how long?" she croaked out, too upset to care that her voice cracked.

Ranma heard the distress in her voice, feeling both better and worse that Akane shared his feelings on the matter. "A month, but we'll see each other at school. And we got plenty of lessons and training and stuff."

"And after the month is over?" Akane asked.

Ranma brightened up. "Well, that's the good part. Then Ucchan has to give up being a fiancée. I still gotta save up and reimburse her dowry, but Mother even offered her services as a matchmaker."

Akane's eyebrows raised in surprise. That almost made the arrangement seem worth it, but her anxiety didn't diminish. Ukyo was pretty clever. Akane doubted she was doing this to be outright mean or spiteful - that wasn't in her character. If Ukyo had made such a drastic arrangement, she had to have some greater plan in mind.

Akane studied Ranma's face. He looked a picture of misery. "Do you know why Ukyo's doing this?"

Ranma cautiously watched Akane, knowing she would not like what he had to say. "Uh, yeah... something about courting me without you around, so I'll fall in love with her."

Akane's grip on her school bag tightened, her knuckles turning white. Ranma could feel the surge of angry aura radiate from her and prepared himself.

Akane glared at him. Her voice was cold. "So you'll be welcoming her everyday at your home while you're not even allowed to see me?"

Akane's envious reaction gave Ranma a momentary ego-boost. He gave her his most playful smile. "Feeling jealous?"

Akane huffed. Despite the progress in their relationship, he was still an immature jerk. Then again, she couldn't help falling into the trap of past behavior. "Why should I be?" she challenged back, purposely ignoring the twinkle in his eye. Her pace quickened and she felt tempted to throw him into the canal.

"Hey, wait up!" Ranma called after her.

Akane ignored him, purposely avoiding his gaze. Ranma jumped in front of her, forcing her to acknowledge him. The time for joking was over. "Look, I ain't happy about this. Ucchan might come over, but it's not 'cause I invited her. There really is nothin' for you to be jealous about. I promise."

Akane hardly looked convinced. She was trying so hard to give him the benefit of the doubt, but she felt her goodwill stretched to its limit. Her voice was quiet and her eyes clouded over. "What about the last time you made such a promise?"

Ranma stopped in place. He could feel the enormity of the moment, and with sudden clarity he realized that the next words he said could make or break Akane's trust in him. Despite his innocent intentions, he'd badly hurt Akane the last time he'd been left alone with Ukyo. Chaos stuck to him like white on rice, and experience painfully proved to him how even the most simple promise could be swept outside his control.

Akane shuffled her feet, waiting for a response and slightly terrified of what it could be. What if Ranma did fall in love with Ukyo? She'd be constantly visiting, probably cooking his favorite meals and buttering up his mother. He already thought she was cute and they were childhood friends.

Akane swallowed hard. The date she and Ranma had shared yesterday had been so perfect, like a dream. The thought of losing him now after they had come so far made her chest tight. Tears pricked her eyes and she quickly turned her head so he wouldn't see.

"Akane?" his voice called to her, but she felt too embarrassed to answer. Suddenly, strong arms wrapped around her. "Ranma...?" Her pride wanted her to fight and break away, but the comforting feel of Ranma embracing her in a hug soothed her insecurities and calmed her soul. She could feel his voice rumble deep in his chest. "No matter what Ukyo does this month, I'm not gonna fall in love with her. I don't want you thinkin' you're just one of my fiancées."

Akane gently pulled away to look at him. Her eyes met his and she found herself staring into the depths of his slate-blue eyes. The sincerity and truth in his eyes held her captive.

Ryoga's talk from before echoed in his mind. Ranma meant every word. He would not string Akane along, intentionally or not, especially while she was rocked by the loss of her father.

"Akane, you gotta know by now...I lo-"

!SPLASH!

Ranma sputtered and Akane broke out of his arms. Akane was only slightly wet, but Ranma had caught the little old lady's ladle of spirit cleansing water straight in the face.

Ranma mopped back his wet, red hair from his face angrily. "Damn stupid curse!"

Akane actually managed to laugh and handed him, now a her, her own pocket handkerchief to dry off.

"You were saying?" Akane pressed.

Ranma blushed. He wanted to tell Akane. It had seemed the perfect moment to finally gear up his courage and let her know, directly and with no fudging of words. But he was gonna do that as a man, dammit, not in this overly feminine cursed body. Maybe he would wait until Pop came back with his cure.

"Uh, I was saying something?" He stalled.

Akane started to frown. He wasn't going to backpedal on her again?! Akane sighed. She didn't want to start another fight. It was possible she read more into what he was about to say than what he meant.

She waved her hand mildly in disappointment. "Oh never mind. Maybe you'll remember later."

Ranma returned Akane's kerchief, but not before using it to gently wipe away a drop of water from her nose.

"I'm sure I will," he responded quietly, the beautifully curved cheekbones on his female face delicately pinked.

Akane smiled, and it felt to him like the sun breaking out from a patch of gray clouds. She grabbed his hand, now a size slightly smaller than Akane's. "C'mon, Ranma. Let's go get you some hot water before we're late."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Gosunkugi cackled like a mad man atop the roof of Furinkan High School. He was frolicking like an overenthusiastic 5-year-old flower girl - only instead of tossing petals, he was scattering his colorful flyers to rain down upon the student body.

Already the students were abuzz with gossip. Although Gosunkugi couldn't make out what anyone was saying from below, his imagination filled in the gaps for him: Ranma Saotome had gone to a sperm bank? What a weirdo. He wasn't even fertile? What a joke of a man! Ranma was a loser! Who would ever date such a pathetic eunuch?

Gosunkugi's pale face broke into a creepy smile as he daydreamed. The only thing that would make his revenge complete would be to see the reaction on Saotome's face when he arrived. Wherever was the jerk? It would be just like him to be late for the first day of school.

It had cost Gosunkugi a small fortune to make the hundreds upon hundreds of copies, but the end result would be worth it; Ranma Saotome would finally get his comeuppance!

And maybe, just maybe, the beautiful Akane-chan would dump Saotome's ass.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ukyo arrived at Furinkan High School with an extra pep in her step. For the next thirty days, she'd have her Ranchan all to herself. Or at least, as all to herself as possible. Even she realized this would be her last chance. She would have to make each day count and really show Ranchan how happy he'd be with her as a wife.

Which was why she was waiting with a mixture of excitement and trepidation for Ranma to arrive to school. Ukyo frowned. It was getting late and she hadn't seen Akane yet, either. Ranma was living on the other side of town from the Tendo residence, so it wouldn't make any sense for them to walk to school together anymore. Ukyo unconsciously fingered the handle on her large battle spatula. It was just a coincidence they were both running a little late. It had to be.

No need to be paranoid, Ukyo reassured herself and took a deep breath. Paranoid isn't cute. And Ranchan likes cute.

An odd fluttering sound broke her out of her thoughts. Raining down from the sky were colorful sheets of paper.

Ukyo plucked one before it landed, many other students doing the same with equally puzzled expressions.

Her eyebrows nearly disappeared into her hairline. What the hell? Ranma was infertile? Ranchan had his fair share of enemies, but this data didn't look fabricated. There was a captured image with a video timestamp clearly showing Ranma at a sperm bank.

This couldn't be true. But if it was…

Ukyo gulped. She wanted to be a mother someday. She wanted kids. Even though she never envisioned herself as the idealized Japanese housewife and stay-at-home-mother, she always thought she'd have them. Preferably with Ranma taking on the role of homemaker while she got to be the breadwinner. Besides, Ranma was unlikely to support them as a martial artist, if Genma's finances were any indication.

In her imagination, Ukyo could just picture how cute and handsome any children produced between her and Ranma would be. She wanted to experience motherhood naturally with her husband. If Ranma couldn't...Ukyo shook her head. She'd deal with that if that really was the case. She didn't spend over a decade chasing after her stolen dowry to give up now. Besides, if Ranma really was broken goods, maybe the Tendos would give up on him! No point in trying to unite the schools to create some uber-heir if Ranma was shooting blanks.

She examined the flyers again. Could it be his curse at work? Or worse, maybe Ranma really did have a physical condition. He had certainly avoided her advances and Shampoo's.

The student body was abuzz with gossip, the flyers stirred up a hornet's nest of rumors. One of the bolder students approached Ukyo. "Hey, you're one of Ranma's fiancées. Is it true?"

Ukyo grimaced. "It better not be," she muttered, scanning the gates for Ranma's arrival. There was still no sign of him, and the first warning bell was chiming.

Ukyo reluctantly brought herself inside and took her seat, glaring at the classroom door. Ranma had some major explaining to do.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"This is not how I wanted to start my first day of senior year!" Akane grumbled, running full out towards the school. Ranma was right next to her, fully male once more. The detour to get Ranma's hot water was successful, but came at the cost of making them late.

The school's clock tower showed they had two minutes left before officially being tardy. Ranma smiled. "Relax, Akane. No way an athletic chick like you can't race to school in time."

Not surprisingly, they were the only ones outside the school building by the time they approached. What was surprising, however, was the littered piles of colorful paper on every inch of the courtyard. It seemed a bit early to be advertising for the school clubs, and they were usually neatly tacked onto the bulletin boards.

Ranma casually picked one up. His eyes bulged and without thought, he viciously crumpled the paper in his hand. He took in the littered grounds with a new sense of horror.

Akane spared a glance to look at him, puzzled and a bit annoyed at the delay. "Come on, Ranma!"

Ranma quickly hid his hands, (and the incriminating piece of paper behind his back), and laughed nervously. "Uh, you go on ahead. I'll be right behind you." Please, please, let that clueless tomboy rush ahead and NOT look at anything else, he mentally pleaded to any deity who could be listening.

Akane looked between Ranma and the clock tower. Despite the nagging feeling that she was missing something, there was no time to dwell on it. If Ranma wanted to be drained by Hinako-sensei again for being delinquent or hold buckets of water in the hallway, that was his business.

She ran into her homeroom just as the bell rang. The buzz of talking students was louder than usual, but when she entered it all came to a stop. Akane cautiously took to her seat, wondering what was making her fellow students behave stranger than usual.

"Psst...is it true?" her friend Yuka slipped her one of the colorful flyers from behind her seat.

Akane looked at the paper, slowly taking in the information. Along with the boldly printed insults at Ranma, there was what appeared to be a photocopied image of Ranma from a security feed. Beside that was another photocopied image of what appeared to be a medical lab test form. She couldn't understand all the medical jargon and various numbers, but there were key sentences that were highlighted. "Sperm Donor: Saotome, Ranma" was the most glaring piece of information, along with a large black inked stamp reading "infertile".

"What the...?" Akane was at a loss for words.

Another student, Shiro - who Akane recognized as one of the more idiotic members of the former hentai horde - leaned over to comment while the teacher's back was turned. "So does that mean Ranma can't get it up, Akane-chan?"

Akane's face went red. "Pervert!" In her indignation, Akane forgot to control her volume. The teacher glared at her, and seized the folded flyer from Akane's hand. "Passing notes and being unruly on our first day, Tendo-san? Tsk-tsk. Why don't you go carry some buckets of water while you contemplate the value of respectful silence in class."

Akane held in a grumble and marched out the door to begin her punishment. She desperately hoped her first day of school wasn't a taste of things to come. The embarrassment of being sent out as a delinquent - within minutes of arriving - was only dwarfed by her curiosity and vexation over that flyer.

Could it be true? She shook her head. It had to be a prank, someone trying to goad Ranma...right? It sounded like the kind of stuff Pantyhose Taro would say to get Ranma riled up.

Her mind suddenly recalled the scene outside the schoolyard. Hadn't there been piles of colorful flyers just like that, littered everywhere? At the time, she had been too worried about being late to stop and examine them.

Akane would have face palmed if she hasn't been holding buckets of water. If Ranma got a hold of this, he would blow a gasket. Speaking of which, where was he?

Uh oh. Akane recalled his funny behavior as they entered the school. If Ranma saw any of those, and found out who pranked him like this, they were a dead man.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ranma wiped away a trickle of sweat from his brow, his breathing hard and fast. Soon as Akane entered the school, Ranma had manically confiscated and, like a rabid wolverine, destroyed every flyer he could find. It had taken him all morning, but he was finally finished. Every trash can around the school was stuffed to the brim with colorful, confetti-like pieces of paper - the sole remnants of the shredded flyers.

At this point he felt satisfied that he kept Akane from seeing them, but hell, he didn't want anyone to see them! He had a bad feeling that his efforts were too little, too late. How long had they been out there?! How many people knew?!

More importantly, who had made and distributed them? He thought only Nabiki and the Amazons knew about his forced trip to the sperm bank. It didn't make any sense for them to spread the news. Even Nabiki wasn't that cold-hearted unless there was a chance for profit, and she would have come directly to him for blackmail first. Mousse would probably get a good laugh out of it, but Nabiki had told Ranma he was in on it. It made little sense for Mousse to stir up trouble after he'd helped free Shampoo from the Kiss of Marriage. Besides, the Amazons had packed up the Nekohaten and left for China already.

Ranma's eyes blazed. There was one other person who knew….

Gosunkugi. That little voodoo-loving twerp was asking for a fist to the face, but unlike Ryoga or Taro, Gosunkugi was a pathetic weakling. Ranma prided himself on keeping an honorable code. He wouldn't fight someone so untrained and incapable of defending himself.

But he could fight fire with fire.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Why, I just heard all the vicious rumors a student started, and had to set the record straight..."

Akane turned to see the strange girl in the lunch yard. She was dressed in the full length skirt and sailor suit top of Saint Hebereke's School for Girls. Although her hair was light brown and in a cropped cut, Akane knew that voice anywhere - especially when it was trying to be over-the-top cute.

Akane face palmed. This was going to be a disaster of some sort. She just had to wait and see what direction it would go in. So far, everyone else seemed clueless as to the identity of the "new girl" who was enthusiastically passing out her own black and white flyers.

When Ranma got near enough to Akane, she raised an eyebrow and half grumbled, half whispered out, "Ranma, what are you up to now, you idiot?"

Ranma's eyes momentarily widened in panic. Why was it that Akane could be so horribly oblivious to P-chan's identity, yet always see through his disguises? He whispered fiercely back to her. "Hey, don't blow this for me, tomboy!"

Akane just rolled her eyes. Ranma hadn't been in class all morning, but he chose now to show up in disguise?

One of the students examined the flyer with a critical eye. "What's with the squibbles?"

Akane had to hold in a giggle. Ranma's artistic endeavors did not favor a pen or pencil. Although she begrudgingly had to admit they might be better than her drawings, Ranma's were comically amateurish. On one side was a stick figure, labeled as Ranma, who was… flexing muscles? There were circles on the stick figure's arms, at least, with captions of "Don't believe the lies!" and "Manliest Man of All Time". The reverse side showed a photocopy of Gosunkugi - who was wearing their girl's dress uniform from the time he had ridiculously tried to pose as Akane - followed by the hand-written caption of "Gosunkugi: World's Girliest Man".

Another student piped up. "Why are you spreading these around?"

Ranma-in-disguise put a feminine hand to her mouth and tried to look demure. "Ho ho, why me? I just couldn't stand by and watch such a manly man be slandered."

Daisuke, who was completely fooled by Ranma's subterfuge despite being a good friend of his, shook his head ruefully. "Don't tell me you're another girl in love with Ranma?", he whined in pitiful jealousy.

Ukyo's ears perked up. She had been mildly aware of the school yard commotion, but had been putting most of her energy into selling hot Okonomiyaki from her portable grill and keeping an eye out for her Ranchan. The mention that there was another hussy after her rightful fiancé had her seeing red.

Ukyo abandoned her grill and stormed up to the new girl, spinning her around to face her. "Just who the hell are you, sugar? Ranma's my fiancé, got it?!"

The swift motion had dislodged Ranma's wig. Vivid red hair poked out from the badly askew hair piece. Ukyo's eyes narrowed in suspicion. Ranma quickly readjusted the wig and tried to giggle innocently. "Oh no, not me! I wish I was that lucky. I'm just trying to spread the truth."

"The truth, huh?" Ukyo growled and she quickly yanked off the wig.

"Hey!" The new girl, now clearly exposed as Ranma in his cursed form, squeaked.

Ukyo tossed the remains of her thermos of hot tea onto Ranma, triggering his transformation.

One of the other students called out sarcastically. "Yeah, very manly, Saotome!"

Ranma ripped off his now painfully, and embarrassingly, too tight female student attire. He had thankfully layered his clothing, and now was in his pants and sleeveless white undershirt.

"What's going on Ranchan? What's with everyone saying you've been to a sperm bank?!" Ukyo demanded as she waved her battle spatula threateningly. Ranma easily swayed and dodged. He caught Akane glaring at him, her expression a blend of curiosity and exasperation.

The school bell chimed, signaling the end of the lunch period. Ranma had never been so happy to hear a school bell in his life. "You better get back to class!" He interjected and ran off - in the opposite direction of the classrooms.

Akane shook her head in dismay, her arms crossed in front of her chest. She had yet to get an answer out of him about the previous flyers, but he couldn't hide from her forever.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

For the remainder of her classes, Akane was distracted and kept looking at the door and windows to see if Ranma had finally gotten over his embarrassment to show up again. Despite his gruff demeanor, he could be insanely sensitive - especially when his curse or perceived manliness was involved.

Soon as her homeroom was shuffled outside to begin physical education - (the girls were to play softball while the boys were to run laps around the field) - her fellow students swarmed Akane with nosy questions. Without Ranma in person to heckle, they had zeroed in on his former live-in fiancée.

Ranma's flyers had not put an end to the previous speculation. If anything, they had only intensified the students' curiosity. Each rumor seemed to grow more and more exaggerated, and soon she was crowded by people peppering her with ever more ridiculous and personal questions.

"Are you still going to marry Ranma?"

"Can Ranma have sex?"

"Is Ranma a dud in bed, Akane?"

"So is Ranma really a girl, then, and the curse turns him into a boy?"

Akane growled, at the end of her patience. "This is ridiculous! I've been to the cursed pools of Jusenkyo. His cursed form is a girl, not the other way around. I don't know anything about these flyers, but I bet it was some moron's idea of a prank to embarrass him. Probably Gosunkugi-kun..."

"Yeah, that little twerp was probably behind it all."

Akane whirled around at the familiar and welcome voice of her fiancé. Ranma had changed into the school's male athletic uniform. "About time you showed up!" she accused him, but there was a flash of joy in her eyes that belittled the gruff words.

Akane stood up on a bench and cleared her throat. Part of her couldn't believe she was going to do this, but if she didn't, who knew how far Ranma's pride would escalate the stupidity.

"Okay everyone, listen up! Ranma is a MAN, despite his curse or whatever stupid piece of paper you read. Anyone making rumors or jokes to the contrary can see me. Got it?"

Akane gave her fellow students a glare that could kill. They were more wary of Akane's temper than Ranma's, and nearly everyone was nodding.

Ranma's eyes were wide in awe. Right now Akane resembled some avenging angel. Her eyes smoldered and the angle of sunlight illuminated her face, creating a halo around her hair. She stepped down from the bench and walked over to Ranma, her expression softening but her eyes remained stern. She waved a finger at him, scolding. "And you better cut out this stupid flyer-war. It's only my opinion that should count, right?"

Ranma gave a good natured smirk. "You could have added 'man among men', but I guess that'll do."

Akane gave him a smack in the arm, but her face still broke out in a smile.

Starting to feel more serious, Ranma opened his mouth. "Thanks, Akane. I-"

Whatever else he was going to say was cut off by Ukyo grabbing his arm. "If anyone knows how much you're a man, it's me, Ranchan."

Akane's smile vanished and Ranma gave her a helpless look. The gathered crowd of students started to disperse and resumed their assigned tasks before the gym coaches could spot them loitering.

Akane had her hands on her hips, the levity from before vanished. Now was the time for some answers. "So why did Gosunkugi start such a hoax in the first place? Although that photograph looked pretty real…"

Then Ranma stuttered, and Akane saw through his awful poker face. "Heh, heh... yeah... all a hoax!"

Akane's mouth dropped open. Here she was defending him, and it was true?

Ranma saw the reaction on Akane's face and realized he was hosed. He managed to break away from Ukyo's grip, and in a blur of speed grabbed Akane's hand and dragged her away. He didn't stop until they reached the privacy of the P.E. equipment room to try to explain.

Akane stared at Ranma in befuddlement. "Why in the world were you at a sperm bank?"

Ranma sheepishly fiddled with his hands. "This is gonna be hard to explain..."

Akane crossed her arms. "Well start. Now."

Ranma took a deep breath. There was no point in hiding the truth any longer. "Remember when Shampoo picked that fight with you?"

Unconsciously, Akane fingered her ribs while she nodded for him to continue.

Ranma resumed, squirming under her gaze. "Well, it got me worried. Even Nabiki worried, and we had to get rid of the Amazons -"

Akane's eyes widened in horror. "So you were trying to get Shampoo pregnant?!"

"NO! Hell no. Not for real. Nabiki promised to rig it... so they would leave you and me alone. Then Cologne agreed to dissolve the Kiss of Marriage since she thinks I can't give her grandkids."

Akane's mouth opened and closed like a stunned fish. "That is the craziest thing I've ever heard," she finally managed to say. Akane cut off the start of Ranma's protest. "Which is probably why I believe you."

It was Ranma's turn to look stunned. "Huh?"

Akane shook her head at him in wonder. She knew how touchy he was about his manhood, but he agreed to go along with a plan that would force him to take a heavy blow to his reputation… and it was all for her sake.

Akane gently took one of his hands into her own. "I appreciate you trying to protect me, but next time, let me in on your plans, okay?"

With her free hand, she brushed the hair from his eyes and leaned towards him, shifting to her tip toes to bring her lips inches from his own.

"There you are!" The door to the equipment shed was wide open and Ukyo stood in the entry.

Ukyo stopped to take in the all-too cozy and private scene in the room. They had, in fact still were, standing far too close together. She felt both relieved that she had interrupted something, as well as upset that there had been something to interrupt.

She glared at Ranma. "Time to spill out the truth, sugar. What's the story about you at a sperm bank and not able to have kids?"

Akane tilted her head in thought. "You know, this whole testing debacle could work in our favor. If you go along with it, maybe Ukyo will dump you."

Ranma's eyebrows shot up, then he shook his head. Akane was missing the obvious problem. "Dummy. Whaddaya think she'll do when we have kids, huh? Exploding okonomiyaki in the hospital?"

Ranma's brain slowly caught up with his mouth.

Akane's face went from surprised shock to a warm blush. The way he said that...he was already planning to have children... with her.

Ranma stared to backpedal in panic. "I, uh, not that we, you know...uh..."

Akane put her fingers to his lips, and gave him one of her dashingly sweet smiles. Small, and cute, with a touch of bashfulness.

"You are jumping the gun - by a lot." She gave him a mock stern look. "We're not married, or anywhere near ready for even, uh, trying for children...yet."

Ranma nodded, his head a whirl from all the implications the word 'yet' implied. Along with that came the warm realization that Akane didn't mind the thought of having his children someday.

Ukyo felt like screaming. In fact, she did. "Hello! I'm right here!" How could they forget she was in front of them. It was if they had entered their own private world. When had this started to happen? Ukyo felt her heart twist painfully, as if someone was wringing it out as fiercely as she would a dirty dishtowel. Ranma and Akane were openly contemplating marriage and children?!

Ukyo was hurting. Hurting even worse than the day she received their wedding invitation, worse than when Ranma had seen Akane in the Mirror of True Love, and the hurt turned to bitterness. She had years of practice at bitter revenge, and her mind quickly took up the old pattern.

She swung her battle spatula out in a slicing maneuver directly between them. Ranma and Akane instantly backed away, their training kicked in automatically and no harm was done, except to the floor.

Ranma gave Ukyo a bashful, almost pitying look. "Relax, Ucchan. I'm 100 percent a man, even with my curse. The test result was a scam to fool the Amazons. Just keep quiet about it, unless you want Shampoo to rain hell on us?"

Ukyo did her best to take in deep, calming breaths, and focus on the positive. The closing of the Nekohanten wasn't a joke, and it did eliminate that Amazon slut from the competition. Ranchan wasn't infertile. She could still have Ranma's kids someday. Even better, she had Nodoka's promise to court Ranma for a full month in his home, and Ranma wasn't allowed to hang out at Akane's house. Ukyo could certainly win him over in thirty days. Akane just had an unfair advantage with the past few years, is all.

It was time to remind Akane just who had the right to be with her Ranchan right now. Ukyo placed her hand gently, but firmly on Ranma's bicep and led him out the door. "I should have known, honey. You're much too manly to fail a fertility test."

Ranma's chest puffed up from the flattery, exactly as Ukyo wanted. She gave him a huge smile, the one she knew showed off her dimples and made her very cute. "Now time to get back before the coaches give us detention." When Ranma's back was turned, Ukyo turned and stuck her tongue out at Akane.

Akane gritted her teeth, but kept quiet. It was going to be a long, and annoying, thirty days.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Author's Notes: Ugh, this chapter took forever to write. I could visualize what I wanted to happen, but couldn't find the right words. Hopefully you all liked it and I managed to add a splash of humor. I won't know unless you REVIEW. Please?

Many thanks to Angela Jewell, for patiently beta-reading and helping me brainstorm, along with PurseMonger for some fun chats and idea bouncing, and all of you who have been reviewing. It helps so much.

Original Publication Date: September 26, 2014