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CHAPTER 38
BPOV ~
I'm not sure what time it was when I heard the bedroom door creek open—I had my back to it, but I knew it was Edward. Every nerve ending in my body was on high alert, patiently awaiting his arrival, and the moment he finally entered the bedroom it was almost as if I could feel his very presence inside of me.
I rolled over slowly, and watched as he quietly moved around the bedroom, opening and closing dresser drawers, before pulling his shirt up over his head. I watched in awe, as his perfectly toned back came into view, but I was quickly startled out of my ogling when he suddenly turned around.
"Bells?" he whispered, slowly walking towards the bed.
I hummed a response as I struggled to sit up a bit, but my man being the gentleman, was quick to extend his hand in offering. "You okay?" he asked. I looked at him curiously, not really getting the question. "You whimpered."
I blushed profusely. "I'm fine," I whispered sheepishly.
Edward leant down and placed a kiss on my forehead. "I'm glad you're still here," he whispered, his lips lingering a bit longer than usual.
My head snapped back at his statement, my eyes instantly filling with tears. "I … I …" I sniffled, wiping away my tears. "I'm sorry if I ever made you think otherwise, but I will always be here, Edward. I love you."
He exhaled a large gust of air and settled on the bed next to me. "I love you, too," he assured, wrapping his arms around me. "And you didn't. It was just my own insecurities." I knew my past actions were the reason for his insecurities, and that made me feel horrible. I would never again leave him, and definitely not without some sort of conversation.
I love Edward and desperately want us to be a family, but regardless of what our future may bring, it will never affect his relationship with our kids. I would never take them away or keep him from seeing them. I made a huge mistake four years ago, and while I can't change it, I can learn from it.
"Edward," I cried. "I love you, but whatever our future holds, whatever obstacles we may face, I will never walk out on you. I promise." I wiped my tears away as more continued to fall. "You deserve a conversation … to know where your kids are."
He smiled, wiping my still falling tears away. "Baby," he whispered. "There will never be a reason for a conversation like that. I love you so much … way too much to ever risk losing you."
I nodded my understanding, as I laid my head on his chest, but neither of us said anything. In fact, it remained silent for quite a while. Edward and I just lying there, wrapped in each other's arms, as his hand lightly caressed my back. I was almost back to sleep when he did start talking.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Jessica," he whispered into the quietness surrounding us.
I lifted my head off his chest, smiling a small smile, before placing a chaste kiss on his lips—I'm sure taking him by surprise. "Yes, I wish you would have told me," I admitted. "But the truth is I have no reason to be mad about what happened that day. Well, besides Masen seeing it. I was jealous, both then, and yesterday at the hospital—"
Edward chuckled, effectively cutting me off, and I narrowed my eyes. "You actually admitted you were jealous," he explained with the same damn chuckle in his voice. "That doesn't happen very often."
I smirked. "Ha-ha." I pressed another kiss to his lips, and went on. "We both know I'm a jealous bitch when you're involved, why must I admit it?" Edward laughed, but he didn't say anything; instead, he brought his lips back to mine for a heated kiss.
I whimpered, pulling myself closer, as my tongue fought for dominance with his. My belly was seriously getting in the way, but I wasn't backing down, and I believe Edward may have sensed it, because he eventually broke the kiss with a laugh.
"I don't think you're gonna get any closer, baby." He pulled me onto his lap so I was straddling him. I narrowed my eyes, and slapped him on the shoulder. Edward laughed and brought his lips to back to mine. "We're okay?" he asked, suddenly very serious, and since my hormones were blowing my emotions all out of proportion, my eyes filled with tears as I nodded.
"We're okay," I assured. "I may be jealous, Edward, but I trust you." I leaned forward and pressed my lips against his. "I can't guarantee I won't act like a crazy bitch from time to time, especially with you working with that—"
He silenced me with another kiss. "She is not going to be a problem, baby. I promise you that." I narrowed my eyes, but he quickly went on before I could say anything. "She knows we're together—"
"Tanya knew we were together," I interrupted.
"Jess isn't Tanya," he defended.
Are you seriously defending your bleach blond whore? I thought, narrowing my eyes at him, again.
"I'm not defending her," he retorted, because I apparently said it aloud. "All I'm saying is Jess and I may have—"
"I don't need specifics," I interrupted, again. "I saw enough."
"Yeah," he retorted. "But what you didn't see, was her slapping me across the face after you and Masen left."
I could feel my eyes falling out of my face. "She slapped you?"
He laughed. "She went all ape shit on me because she thought I was cheating on you. I guess her ex-husband cheated on her for years, and she swore she'd never do that to another woman. I told her we weren't together, but I don't think she believed me."
"Wow," I laughed, placing my hands on either side of his face. "I like her spunk."
Edward laughed, again, just as there was a soft knock on the door. "Momma?"
Edward and I just looked at each other, chuckling softly. "Yes, Masen?" I answered in a singsong voice, as I climbed off Edward's lap.
The door opened slowly, at least until Edward came into his view; then it flung wide open, hitting the wall. "DADDY!" Masen exclaimed excitedly as he ran towards the bed.
"Masen!" Edward exclaimed, opening his arms up for a launching Masen.
It literally took our son a matter of seconds to clear the room and jump in his father's arms. Edward and I both laughed, but he was the first to talk. "Did you miss me that much?"
Masen nodded as he turned to look at me. "Momma did too," he informed. "She was sad."
Edward looked at me, but then returned his attention to Masen. "I know, buddy, but momma's better now." He glanced to me, again. "Isn't that right, mommy?"
I nodded, smiling brightly. "I am."
Masen looked at me carefully, before smiling a bright smile and turning back to his father. "Momma's gonna taking me shopping for your burfday pesent."
Edward eyed me skeptically. "Oh, she is, is she?"
I smiled. "Yup. Masen wants to pick out your present all by himself, don't ya, Mase?"
He nodded excitedly. "Uh-huh. I gonna buy you—"
"Masen, honey," I interrupted with a giggle. "Remember what I told you last night? It's a secret surprise."
He nodded, biting his lip slightly. "Oh, yeah. Sorry, daddy." Edward laughed, hugging Masen to him, as he kissed him on the top of the head.
"It's okay, Mase," he assured. "I like surprises." Edward turned his attention on me again, cocking his eyebrow slightly. I just smirked—Edward didn't like surprises anymore than I did.
I tickled the bottom of Masen's bare foot. "It's a bit early for you to be awake," I pointed out. It was just after seven in the morning, and considering it was closing in on one in the morning when I made him turn the T.V. off and go to sleep, he should have slept another three hours at least.
He pouted his bottom lip out and looked to his father. "I not tired." He wasn't at all convincing, considering he followed his words up with a yawn.
Edward chuckled, but I was the one to speak. "Well, that was one heck of a yawn for a little boy not tired. Sorry, buddy, but back to bed."
"Mommy," he whined.
"Hey," Edward soothed. "You need to be well rested if you're gonna go shopping with Momma later, and besides, I'm going to sleep for a little while."
"I sleep in here?" he asked, once again pouting his bottom lip. "Please?"
Edward and I both laughed. "I suppose," he relented, while I pouted a bit internally. I was hoping to get a little action before he fell asleep—my hormones were completely out of control.
"Yay!" Masen cheered.
Edward chuckled as he moved Masen off his lap and slid off the bed. "Get comfy," he instructed pointing to his side of the bed.
Masen scooted to his father's side of the bed, squirming his way beneath the blankets, as I watched Edward slip off his dress slacks and replace them with a pair of sleep pants. Masen had his back to us, cuddling his father's pillow, as Edward crawled over my legs and slid in between the two of us.
I had just cuddled into his side when Masen rolled over and pouted—lip and all. "Daddy, you cuddle wif me?" Edward lifted his arm, silently gesturing for Masen to snuggle in, but that wasn't enough for our son. "I can't sweep wike this," he explained. "I hasda face that way."
Edward sighed in defeat, before placing a kiss on top my head and rolling over to cuddle our master manipulator. I loved my child deeply, but he's become quite possessive of his father lately, and while he deserves Edward's attention, so did his brother and I. I could only image how things would be when the girls arrived.
I understood he was trying to make up for lost time, and quite possibly trying to cram a lifetime of daddy and Masen time into the now, but Edward wasn't going anywhere. Esme suggested some one-on-one therapy for Masen, as well as some family sessions after Edward's accident, and I was really starting to consider it. It was a really hard time for Masen, and while Edward and I have done everything in our power to help him understand, it hasn't seemed to have helped. Add that to Liam's arrival and the impending addition of the twins, it leaves a very insecure almost four year old.
It didn't help that I was overly hormonal and haven't spent more than a few minutes with my boyfriend in nearly four days, and what time I did get to spend with him was ruined by his little—Jessica. Yes, I believed Edward, and her apology did seem sincere, so I didn't really foresee her causing any problems, but I still didn't like that she'd been intimate with him—that he'd been intimate with anyone during our split. Irrational I know.
Tears started filling my eyes as the past began to invade me, and try as I may; I wasn't able to keep them at bay. I didn't want to wake Masen or Edward with my crying, so as carefully and quietly as I could, I slid from the bed, grabbing the baby monitor as I did, and made my way downstairs.
Liam woke up just before six for a bottle, which meant I had a few hours before he would be stirring for the day; therefore, I grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch and sat down with my back against the armrest. I laid my head on the back of the couch and just let the tears fall. I didn't necessarily know what I was crying over—the mistakes of my past, Edward's torrid affair that resulted in a love child, or was it the completely stupid and totally unnecessary jealousy I was feeling toward my son? Yes, I know how idiotic that sounded, but the hormones where causing some irrational thoughts and feelings.
"Bella," Edward whispered breaking into my thoughts as he entered the family room. "Baby, you should be sleeping. What are you doing down here in the dark?"
I wiped my tears away as he made his way to the couch. "I just couldn't sleep. I hope I didn't wake you or Masen."
He lifted my legs, draping them over his lap, as he sat down next to me. "Are you crying?"
I shook my head. "No, I just—"
"Don't lie to me," he interrupted, lightly brushing my tears away. "Why are you crying?"
I scooted closer to Edward and rested my head on his shoulder. "It's stupid," I whispered, as he slipped his hand beneath the blanket and my nightgown, and gently started rubbing my thigh.
"Bella," he murmured against my forehead. "Baby, please talk to me." I nuzzled my face into his shoulder as he sighed. "Is it Jessica? Are you …?"
I lifted my head to look at him when he trailed off. "What? No. It's not—well, not …." I sighed. I didn't know how to explain how I was feeling. "It's a combination of things, Edward. I'm pregnant remember? I cry over everything." I could tell he wasn't buying it. He wanted an answer. "I just … I missed you."
That seemed to appease him, because he placed a gentle kiss on my lips, and then whispered, "I know, baby. I missed you, too. I hate being away from you for so long. Trust me; I'd change it if I could."
I nodded once and gave him a small smile. "I just … I hoped …."
Edward waited a moment before he spoke; I'm sure waiting to see if I was going to continue. "You just what, baby? What did you hope?" I felt my face flush with unnecessary embarrassment, as I burrowed in between his shoulder and the back of the couch. He nudged me with his elbow. "Bella?" he coaxed.
"I was hoping we could … it's been awhile …." I answered sheepishly.
Edward chuckled, as he lifted my chin so he could see my face. "It's been a few days, hasn't it?" He brought his lips to mine, sucking lightly on my bottom lip before he pulled away. "I fully intend to make it up to you."
I shivered, as the twins started kicking and moving around like crazy. I couldn't help the giggle—they were notorious for going nuts when their father paid special attention to me.
He laughed, pulling the blanket off me. "They're in there going nuts, aren't they?" he asked, pushing my nightgown up, before placing his hands on my bare belly. I nodded as he brought his lips to my stomach and placed a kiss on each side. I couldn't help the smile; I loved it when he lavished my belly with attention.
I giggled and ran my fingers through his hair. "Of course we are daddy."
He lightly ran his fingers around my baby bump, and whispered, "Good morning my little angels."
Both girls started kicking, and Edward smiled brightly, bringing tears to my eyes. I always wondered how it would have been if Edward had been around during my pregnancy, so seeing him coo and kiss my belly—the fact that he was so attentive to my wants and needs—tore my heart to shreds. Then I wondered had he been around during my pregnancy with Masen, would things be this way now?
Of course, they would, my subconscious chided. You're talking about Edward remember?
"Daddy can't wait to meet you," he murmured against my belly. "To hold you in my arms—kiss your precious little cheeks, but in the meantime, be gentle on your momma. She's a tiny little thing."
I laughed. "I'm far from tiny, Edward."
He pressed another kiss against my belly and then brought his lips to mine. "Sorry, my love," he whispered. "But you aredefinitely tiny." His lips were back on mine before I had a chance to protest, and I couldn't have been happier. I missed his kisses.
I whimpered, attempting to pull him closer as he deepened the kiss and lightly moved his hand up and down my left side, softly caressing my pebbled skin. I was suddenly desperate for skin-to-skin contact and broke the kiss, panting with need.
"Edward," I moaned, grinding my thigh against his erection as he moved his lips over my jaw. "Make love to me, please? I need you."
"Gladly," he breathed against my neck, before pressing a kiss against it and pulling back. He quickly stood up and extended his hand to me. I looked at him curiously, but he didn't give me a chance to speak. "Not here. I want you comfortable, and every inch of your body easily accessible." I gasped, but Edward just smirked.
I placed my hand in his and allowed him to pull me from the couch. He led me through the house and back up the stairs to the guest bedroom. The moment the door closed behind us, he wrapped his arms around me from behind and griped my nightgown in his hands. Quickly, he pulled it over my head, tossing it to the side, before moving on to my panties.
Edward waited until I was completely naked, before he turned me around to face him. Yes, he'd seen me naked recently, but I still blushed with embarrassment. The room was bright as the sun shone in, lightening it up, as I stood before him in all my pregnant, naked, glory, and his eyes trailed over every inch of my pink skin.
He chuckled as he stepped forward and placed his hands on either side of my face. "You are absolutely gorgeous," he whispered, as his hands slid from my face, trailing slowly down my body to rest on my stomach. "Especially like this—pregnant with my babies."
Edward pulled me into his arms, as the sincerity of his words brought tears to my eyes. "I mean it, Bella. You've always been beautiful, but the way you glow when you're pregnant …." His words trailed off as he brought his lips to mine. "I love you," he whispered breaking the kiss. "So much, baby."
I relished the feel of his arms wrapped around me and nuzzled my face into his chest. "I love you, too," I whispered, before placing a kiss on his chest and following it up with a gentle nip. Edward moaned, spurring me on, as he gripped my ass in his hands and I repeated my actions.
The whimpers and moans filled the room around us, as we slowly made our way to the bed—his hands groping and kneading my ass, while I continued to pay homage to his chest. There was no doubt I was leaving my mark, but I couldn't bring myself to care. I was so incredible horny, and he tasted divine; therefore, I continued to nip and suck my way around his chest.
"You about done marking your territory?" he asked bringing me out of my lust induced haze.
I felt my face heat up immediately as tears filled my eyes. "I'm sorry," I whispered trying to pull away, but Edward wasn't allowing it.
He gripped my chin in his hand and forced me to look at him. "Don't be," he murmured bringing his lips to mine for a quick kiss. "I was just wondering when it was gonna be my turn."
He spun us around quickly, and I found myself standing between his legs, as he sat on the edge of the bed. The sudden movement brought forth some dizziness, and I gripped his shoulders to stabilize myself; luckily, he had a firm grip on my hips.
"Whoa, baby," Edward chuckled pulling me into his lap. "You okay?"
I nodded. "Just got a little dizzy," I explained, pulling my lip between my teeth as I moved to straddle his thighs. "Now, you said something about marking your territory?"
Edward growled, and before I knew it, his lips were against mine, kissing me with just enough passion and severity, as his hands moved frantically up and down my sides, his thumbs occasionally brushing over my nipples, while I ground my heated center against his hardened member.
I was panting with need and lack of oxygen, when Edward broke the kiss and trailed his lips down my neck, gently nipping and sucking, as he moved his hands to my hips and started guiding my movements. When he descended on my chest, I arched my back and cried out, rocking harder and faster on his cloth-covered cock.
"Jesus, baby," Edward groaned against my skin. "I can feel how wet you are … you're ready for me, aren't you?" He trailed his mouth to my breast, and pulled a nipple into his mouth, as he moved his left hand off my hip and skimmed his fingers over my throbbing clit, before dipping them into me to test his theory.
Edward started pumping his fingers, slowly, in and out, as he worked over my nipple. He was alternating between gently nipping, licking, sucking, and circling it with his tongue, add that to the antagonizingly slow movement of his fingers, and it was no wonder I was on the verge of insanity.
I threaded my fingers into his hair, to keep him where I wanted him, and bucked my hips greedily. "Oh, Edward … I am. Baby, please?" Edward moved his attention to my other breast and quickened the rhythm of his fingers.
I was teetering on the edge of my orgasm—it was literally just out of reach. "Oh, right there, Edward! Ohhh, God," I cried finding my release. "Yes!"
Edward continued to stroke me, in and out, as I straddled his thighs and came down from my high. My head was resting on his shoulder, the rest of my body sagging against his, as he rubbed my back with his other hand. I was utterly spent, but I was not anywhere close to being done with him. Yes, the finger fucking I'd just received was far more action then I'd gotten in nearly four days, but I desperately wanted him to make love to me.
"Edward," I whimpered lifting my face to meet his. By this point, both of his hands were on my hips, and he was rubbing small circles against them—I'm sure my lip was between my teeth, and if I wasn't already the brightest shade of red there was, I'm positive I would have been.
Edward brought his lips to mine and kissed me chastely, before breaking the kiss and lifting me off his lap. I pouted, lip and all, but all he did was smirk. I watched carefully as he stood and removed his sleep pants and boxers in one swift move. His cock sprang free and I felt myself becoming wet all over again. I couldn't wait to have him inside of me.
He chuckled. "See something you like?" he asked, bringing my attention to his face, because I was apparently ogling his glorious cock. I pulled my lip between my teeth and nodded sheepishly.
Edward laughed and pulled me to straddle his thighs, again. "Well, since you're already naked," he murmured, as his hardened member slowly started filling my wet center. I moaned, because it felt so fucking good to have him home again, and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him as close as I could with my pregnant belly.
He slowly started moving me on his cock. "Edward," I whimpered, before lightly sucking on his pulse point, careful not to leave a mark, as I moved my lips down his neck. "Oh, God … you feel …."
I started moving on my own accord, as Edward guided my movements and breathed hot against my neck. "I know, baby … so do you," he muttered in my ear. "So fucking good!"
Slowly, I unlocked my arms, leaving my hands on his shoulders, as I increased my movements and started moving harder and faster on his member. I was a whimpering mess of need when Edward brought his hands to my breasts and gently started fondling them, occasionally rolling my nipples between his fingers.
I rolled my hips, and Edward hissed, ducking his head to pull a nipple into his mouth, making me cry out in ecstasy. It felt so good having him buried so deep inside of me, as I continued to bounce around on top of him. I was on the verge of falling over the edge when Liam's faint cries seeped into the guest bedroom.
Edward brought his finger down to my clit and started rubbing earnestly when I groaned in disappointment. "Come on, baby. Come for me!" he breathed, pinching my clit, making me cum just as he pumped his load into me.
Liam's cries had subsided, but as much as I wanted to sit there wrapped in his arms, I knew it wasn't possible. Our little boy was probably hungry, and it was only a matter of time before his brother would be waking up for the day.
"I'll get him," Edward whispered, kissing me softly on the neck. I shivered, making Edward laugh, as I stood and started looking for my panties and nightgown.
"I'll get his bottle ready," I affirmed, pulling my nightgown over my head, as Edward pulled his sleep pants back on.
Edward gave me a sweet smile and wrapped his arms around me. "Do you have any idea how much I love you?" he breathed, before pressing a kiss against my lips. I, of course, returned the kiss and then stepped out of his embrace.
I smiled, glancing at him as I exited the bedroom. "As much as I love you," I supplied. "If I had to guess."
"Damn straight!" he assured, pulling me in for another quick kiss. We went our separate ways, me going downstairs to make a bottle and start breakfast, while Edward went in to collect and change a wet Liam.
**Author's Note**
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